It’s no secret, marriage is hard. Marriage is hard enough when you live in a house with multiple rooms, that you can hide in to get away from each other. (Not that I used to do that…) But what if you live in an RV that is 272 square feet? I knew that when we decided to completely turn our lives around, sell all our stuff, and move into an RV to travel the country that, not only were our day to day lives going to change but our marriage as well.
We have always been pretty attached to each other. From day one, way back when we were in 8th grade, Gerrit was my best friend. We’ve been inseparable ever sense, but living in an RV gives the word, inseparable, a whole new meaning.
Our anniversary is coming up in May and I couldn’t help but reflect on the past three years we’ve spent as a married couple and how much we’ve changed while living in the RV.
We are with one another 24 hours a day 7 days a week. I can honestly count on one hand how many hours we’ve spent apart since we moved into the RV. Aside from the occasional grocery store or laundry run, we are always together. Let me paint that picture for you a bit more clear. I wake up, he’s there making coffee in the kitchen that is three steps away from our bed. I’m getting ready in the bathroom and he’s there getting ready for the day too because we have one bathroom, it is only 2 feet wide I might add. Then I make breakfast and go about our day with a max of 32 feet between us at any given point. Point blank, in order to survive you have to be able to get along, and get along real well. No more fighting over little stuff, like who left the milk out, or who ate the rest of the Oreos because being in a tight space can raise those tensions way too high and fast.
Of course one of you can always just go outside to get some distance, but we’ve come to a point where we’re so attached that we hardly go outside with out the other person. It’s hard to describe what it’s like to be this in tune with another human being.
Living in an RV has pushed us together, more than I would have even thought imaginable. And honestly, I can not imagine a life without Gerrit and I being together all day everyday. We’re more of a team now than we have ever been. If everyday was a team sport, then we would win more times than not. It is a little hard to get into a routine when you are changing location all the time but the things we have to do on a daily basis pretty much stay the same. We have to attach and detach the jeep on travel days, level the RV, exercise the dogs, etc. Those things don’t change but they require effort from both of us and we have to work together to get those things done quickly and efficiently.
That’s not to say we don’t still argue every once in a while, we still have disagreements but overall when we do argue we reach a conclusion much quicker and with less heartache.
All of this reflection on how our marriage has strengthened over the past four months led me to the thought of how my relationship with God has changed, in a big way. I am closer with God now than I have ever felt in my entire life. And if you know us, you know that we both grew up in the church, that is were we met. In Indy we attended a very large fancy church. We truly enjoyed going almost every Sunday and we learned a lot from a variety of great teachers. While that was all well and good we didn’t really feel “at home.”
Being in the presence of His creation every single day has brought the presence of God into our home in a way that is stronger than it ever was before. I see him everywhere now, in everything we see and do and say. I look out my window at his creation and thank him for the beautiful day and life he has given my family. I am able to talk to him like I do my husband. He has become my ultimate best friend and I am so thankful that the experience of living in an RV these past 4 months have brought me that. While my relationship with God is far from perfect, my perspective has shifted and that is exciting!
Living in a tiny space with your spouse does not sound appealing to most, but I would challenge anyone to do it! With less material stuff, there is more room for our marriage to grow and for our hearts to be filled with God’s gracious beauty.
Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.