Tag Archives: ascension

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Dream: Weight of the World

This week has been riddled nightly with vivid and intensely emotional dreams. My days are “normal” with a bit of a numb feeling. But at night it’s like I am being hit from all sides. This one was from this morning. From what I can gather, there is some major clearing going on that goes beyond my individual clearing.

Dream: Weight of the World

Felt to be on a vessel of some sort. I was transferred to another one.

Then I was in a house with a group of people. We were putting up food. Lettuce was being put away. My food was open. I asked another person if they wanted some of my peas telling them I would pack them frozen and when they thawed they were perfect for eating. Then I went to the fridge and got out eggs. One split in half. It was frozen.

The others in the house were preparing to leave. 6 of us would stay. I remember discussing how we would live together in a sustainable community. We talked about solar power and I perked up, discussing how if we disconnected from the power grid when it failed we would be able to maintain our power as a group.

The scene shifted and I was floating along a road. I took a road and saw it went parallel to the main one. There was trash and beer cans indicating a party had been there the night before. I stopped at a church and ran into two women. One women was huffy and angry. She asked about a woman and a man. I told her they were in the hospital. I saw the woman in my mind sitting by the bed of a very sick man. He looked almost like someone with AIDS. There was such love between the two of them and I felt every bit of it. I mentioned to her that he was still sick and she said, “Then there is no point in picking her up, then.” She got very angry and walked away. The other woman talked to me for a bit about the woman having great potential, talking about how she was as a child and mentioning how good she would have been as an actress.

I turned and saw groups of people walking through the church. They looked to be in a parade. The main group I watched was all dressed in light blue scrubs, like they were all nurses. They were singing, “I’ve got guns in my head and they won’t go…..” When I saw them I filled with huge amounts of grief. It welled up from within, splitting my heart in two with such pain I could not breathe. They continued to sing, “I’ll be a dreamer ’til the day I die…” and the grief became super intense. I began to sob uncontrollably, the pain was so much that I didn’t know if I would survive it. As I began to gain consciousness I heard, “Autism” and I felt huge amounts of sorrow for everyone in the world who was struggling and feeling trapped in the human condition.

I woke in heaving sobs, my heart hurting so badly I did not know what to do about it. I couldn’t breathe for the crying and my throat felt like it would explode. It seemed like I was purging the heaviness of the world – all of the sorrow, grief, despair and pain of millions upon millions of people. I told my guidance the pain would surely kill me.

I went into the in-between and heard, “Be a manager. We will help you.”

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Picture of my butterfly friend.

Butterfly Friend

As I have been able to do since this onslaught began, I easily adjusted and went about my day as if all was “normal”. This afternoon, near the front of my car, I saw at my feet a small butterfly on the ground. He was very obviously struggling so I reached down and offered him my finger. He grabbed on and I carried him into my car. He traveled with me all the way home, slowly recovering from the colder temperatures that came in today. I took him inside, hoping he would completely recover but knowing I could not let him go and that ultimately he would die.

My youngest was fascinated with him and fiercely protected him from my other two children, shielding him with his entire body to make sure no one touched him or hurt him. Unfortunately, the poor butterfly died despite all his protection. He was just too weak.

The butterfly I found was a Buckeye Butterfly. Such a magnificent creature. So fragile and beautiful. Unfortunately, I am not sure his message is a positive one. Ending of a cycle perhaps? Or maybe something else.

I feel exhausted today. It is like all my inner strength has been sucked away. I would like a reprieve from this crazy emotional purging.

 

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Another Beneficial Conversation

I had another productive conversation with my spouse yesterday. I find it quite curious but welcome such conversations. For some reason I end up channeling information out of the blue in these conversations and it leaves me feeling awed and inspired.

The Council

These conversations are challenging because my husband is not on the ascension path with me. He is not familiar with the terms I use and finds it difficult to relate to my spiritual experiences. However, it is the very challenge of explaining certain concepts to him that creates the perfect opportunity for Spirit to use me as a channel.

To my surprise, my husband brought up a memory he had of what he called “the Committee.” He described this committee as a group with a dark agenda who made him feel small, insignificant and afraid. He encountered them while in session (similar to hypnosis) and described having multiple memories of this committee. He described the time related to these encounters as “folding in on itself” – as if time was nonexistent. Each time he recalled an encounter he felt judged by them. Finally, however, he recalled confronting this group. He said they told him what he would do and he said to them, “No, I will not do that.” He said then he felt freed of them and relieved.

I smiled in recognition and told him the time element was likely nonexistent because encounters with such committees (which I told him I called the Council) occur between lives and beyond the realm of Time/Space.

Then I shared with him my experiences with the Council. How when I first encountered them I also felt afraid, small and insignificant, like a child being sent to the principal’s office. However, after many experiences and discussions with them, I realized that this feeling was brought about by my Forgetfulness while in a human body and by the largeness of their energy. It does make one feel small and overpowered. There is a sense that what they say is what must be done and a sense that my own choices are faulty in comparison to their great wisdom.

Then I explained to him that how the Council appears to us is a direct reflection of us. If we are highly critical, judgmental, doubtful, fearful, etc – then we will perceive them through those lenses. As we become more aware of our own power and potential, the Council shifts dramatically from an authoritative or dictatorial group to a democratic or mentoring group. I congratulated him on his successful recognition that he was the director of his own life and no one, not even the Council, had the authority to tell him what to do unless he gave them that power.

Dreams as Teachers

The conversation then shifted to dreams and how I interpret them. I explained that I see everything in my dreams as a reflection of myself. Dreams are, to me, a gateway to the subconscious/superconscious and through them I am able to reach into a deeper, unseen part of myself and initiate great healing and growth. I explained that I am seeing my experiences in the physical in a similar way now. That each person, situation and event that comes into my life is a mirror of mySelf offering great potential for learning. He seemed to grasp the benefit to this.

Divine Connection

The conversation shifted to soulmates/twin flames/Divine counterparts (you choose your term). He wanted to understand what it was. I told him, “So do I!” I began by asking him if he thought it possible that his Higher Self could experience many lifetimes at the same time. He was curious to know what I meant.

Since he was in agreement with me that we exist outside Space/Time as Spirit, I started there, explaining that if we function from outside that boundary that we could in fact experience many lifetimes in many forms all at once. I used an octopus to illustrate my point. I told him to imagine that his Higher Self was the body of the octopus and that each of his legs extended into a different Space/Time. Each leg connects to an individualized consciousness that then experiences an individual lifetime. When that lifetime concluded it would retract back to the body of the octopus and be integrated there into the Whole. I explained that from where we are (in a human body) it would appear that we are the body of the octopus but in reality we are just one aspect, one leg, extended forth into a timeline to have a separate experience.

He seemed to relate and understand so I continued. I said, “What if two legs were on the same timeline? What if three or four or even more were on the same timeline? Is it possible?” He agreed that it would be (so do I). I asked him, “What if two of those individuals met? What do you think it would be like to meet yourself?” He thought about it. He didn’t answer but his face showed that he realized it would be an exceptional experience. Then I said, “That is the closest I can come to explaining the (soulmate/twin flame/Divine Counterpart) experience.”

The image of the octopus has stayed with me ever since this conversation. I see it as purple for some reason. The idea resonates with me and I can’t help but smile when I think about it. I hope it was helpful to you.

Teachable Moments

There is something educators are very good at: taking advantage of teachable moments. A teachable moment is an unplanned opportunity that arises in the classroom where a teacher has an ideal chance to offer insight to his or her students. It is a fleeting opportunity that must be sensed and seized by the teacher. Teachable moments have maximum impact.

As I reflect on this most recent conversation with my husband, it is obvious to me that it was a teachable moment. I have had many such similar moments with others, also. What is exceptional about these moments is that the teacher also becomes the student whether they are aware of it or not. It is the same from the student perspective, also. The student is also the teacher. The more we allow ourselves to take advantage of teachable moments in our lives, the more potential there is for growth on all dynamics.

 

 

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Taking Your Place

This is it ya’ll. It’s time to get in position and make our mark. You ready?

I’m having a good day today. I feel solid. Balanced. Work is spectacular. I’m setting in. I’m making an impact. I’m getting hugs. Lots and lots of hugs. Don’t you love hugs?

Today for the first time I actually looked forward to work. This is a GOOD sign. Whew! I was worried for a bit because the first few days were so bumpy with me shifting all over the place and not feeling like I belonged.

I’m getting recognized and acknowledged by others. I’m getting appreciation. It’s nice to be appreciated.

I can see why I was placed in this assignment and I accept that I will be given another assignment after. I’m okay with wherever that might be. I understand that I am picking up pieces of experience, a tool-kit of sorts, to use later. “Pay attention.” “Learn.” “Listen.” These are messages that come through all day long. I can feel the importance of my location even if I don’t quite understand it yet.

I am told we are being given our assignments. These aren’t little assignments either. These are not “lessons” or “preparation” tasks, though they do have these components. We are being placed in locations to practice what we have learned. It is practicum time. Internship. Whatever you want to call it. These placements put our skills to use in 3D where we shine our Light in our own special way. Some of us have already been doing this. Me, I’m a little “slow”. I liked my cave too much I guess.

When we have completed our missions, we will be sent elsewhere to continue our work. These are not necessarily locations we would expect. Our expectations go out the window with this. Funny enough, I am accepting and living day by day, moment to moment. And you know what? It is happening without me getting in the way of myself. I have no anxiety or stress (except for the traffic but that’s another story). I am not overthinking or looking too far ahead. And I am learning to like surprises instead of dread them.

I had thought that returning to work meant I would lose my spiritual experiences and connection. Not true. At all. In fact, I am probably more tuned in to my guidance than I was. The energetic experiences (Kundalini) are even back. Who’d have thought? Ha!

Perhaps we needed to be tried and tested to get to this point. I know I did. I had to lose control, or at least feel like I did, to get back to myself. Where I am assigned (and that IS what it is) is perfect for me. I will be challenged but it is all stuff I can do and have done – I have just been resisting it. With this challenge comes growth but also satisfaction and appreciation for all the hard work that led me to this point.

Now it’s time to take 5D TO 3D. But don’t worry about HOW that is done. Just DO it. That is what you came here for. 🙂 Yay!

 

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Mission: Illuminate Mankind

Wow, where to start. Lots to write about…..

Okay, well, I will likely have to split this all up into two posts to make any sense of it.

Dream: White Winged Unicorn

I was at an amusement center of some kind. One of those indoor kinds with video games, food, bumper cars, etc. People were everywhere. Kids especially. I was with my family, but none of them were recognizable except my middle son. There was a place where there was suppose to have been a bowling ally put in but it was not there and someone directed me to the restroom. Inside it was very cramped and two women came in and got into a shower fully clothed. The shower was literally right up against the back of the toilet and positioned above it so that the person on the toilet was underneath the shower. I got sprayed by the water and got grossed out.  I left as soon as I could. Amusement park is enjoyment of life. Shower is renewal and forgiveness.

I went outside and everyone was talking about this new ride. I saw a billboard sign of the ride but can’t recall the name now. My guides tell me the name was “Apex” so I take their word for it. We walked to the entrance and I looked up. I saw a horse-shaped orange statue high above us. Then it moved and I knew it wasn’t a statue. One of the kids pointed and yelled to look. The orange horse creature then moved and as it did it morphed into this brilliantly white winged unicorn.

I lost the family group then because I was staring at the winged unicorn. It became very large then, as if I or him shifted positions so that we were much closer. He was on this ramp leading up at a very steep angle. He could not go anywhere but up because he was pinned in by railing on both sides of the ramp. He was up on his hind legs kicking at the railings and trying to get out only to get stuck and have to stay on the ramp. His horn was exceptionally long and he was using it like a sword. He was neighing very loudly and snorting in anger. Eventually he reared up and took off, galloping up the ramp at breakneck speeds. I watched him reach the end, leap up into the air and fly off into the distance. It was magnificent. He was the most beautiful creature. Winged unicorn is a mixture of unicorn and Pegasus. Pegasus is swiftness and bravery in a stormy relationship. Unicorn is high ideals, hope and insight into a situation. White is purity.

Stunned, I walked into the APEX ride location.  I was late. It was meant to start at 11. My family group was already inside. The ticket agent asked for my ticket.  An old man from my group gave it to the ticket lady. She looked at the ticket and said, “This is a very old ticket. Ancient.” My interpretation of this was that it came from the 1980’s and I saw in my mind this very old and tattered ticket stub. A ticket is the start of something and the price one has to pay to gain admittance. This one is old, like I’ve been trying to gain admittance for a long time.

I went inside but had a gallon water jug with me. I set it on the floor because I couldn’t take it with me. As I went in, I saw a grouping of chairs with at least a dozen jugs of water on them. Contained or controlled emotion.

Inside was pitch black. It was like a movie theater without the screen. I felt around, calling for my group. The old man grabbed my hand and said, “We’re sitting on the floor” and led me away from the first grouping of seats. I wonder what kind of ride this was. It felt like a screen was located on the ceiling.

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Message

I woke up with a start knowing the dream was a good message. I saw it was 5am. I had slept straight through the night, not waking even once. The winged unicorn was very vivid in my memory. I loved winged unicorns as a child. In fact, I was obsessed with drawing them (and horses) until we moved in 1986.

I fell into the in-between. Here I saw a black stallion rearing up and neighing loudly. He was kicking his feet at masses of clutter and several people that were surrounding him. The scene was very colorful. The clutter was very bright, especially the color red.

This vision brought me out of the in-between. I noticed the contrast between the white winged unicorn and the black stallion (one of my all-time favorite childhood movies BTW). Too tired to think about it, I attempted sleep.

This time I entered a scene where I was floating or moving through a tunnel filled with various designs and geometric shapes. It was as if I was flying through inter-dimensional space or some kind of wormhole. In front of me written very clearly was the word, “Pleiades”. The E, I, A, and D were bright white and the other letters dim in comparison. Then I both saw and heard, “Illuminate Mankind”.

I came out of my reverie and felt different. I can’t explain it really. It was clear to me that I was being communicated with by my group. They were informing me of my mission but also of their mission. The Pleiadian mission is to illuminate mankind. It couldn’t have been made more clear. lol This is also my mission (finally! Thank you!). I wonder now what is meant by “illuminate”. Does it mean to “make bright” like the letters in my vision? Or to “make lucid or clear”? Or “enlighten as with knowledge”?  Probably all of them.

 

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Down for the Count

Tomorrow I start back to work (yeah I got a job) so you all will not see as much of me. Since I have also been awfully irritable and grumpy for the past couple of days, I hope I can stand being at work all day. I want to be a hermit but can’t. There is nothing more nasty than a hermit that can’t hide or retreat. Trust me. Training starts at 7am and with a 20 minute commute there, it will be a very early morning for me. God help the other employees who have to sit next to me all day in training. LOL Coffee will be my friend.

I am blaming the atrociously intense energies for my moodiness and increase in hermit tendencies. There has been a geomagnetic storm raging for 4 days staight. Yep – FOUR DAYS! All I can say is WTF sun? Can you please let up a bit so I can be somewhat normal for my first day of work tomorrow? Pretty please? Some are saying this is major DNA upgrade time. All I can say is if this is an upgrade it feels like I got gypped. Either that or I accidentally got a downgrade to 1988. lol

On top of all the raging geomagnetic storms, I am dealing with the return of my husband and his ever-high energy (can you say Gemini overload?). After a whole month of just my three children’s energies to contend with (love my babies) now I have to readjust. Again. Let me remind you, my husband is very social. So, with me in hermit mode we are like night and day. Opposite extremes is an understatement. However, I cautiously ventured to a neighbor’s party last night just to be socially correct and because my husband requested my attendance. I stayed an hour. Within that time I got a headache and began to feel nauseous. Once I got home both of those symptoms vanished. Did I tell him this? No. I hid away from everyone until bedtime. I needed to retreat. Big time.

September is kicking my butt, ya’ll. Yep. I’m down for the count. Well at least until I have to get up and go to work (BAD timing!). Wish me luck. Maybe, just maybe I will survive and come home with a smile instead of a headache.

 

 

 

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Upgrade Time

At least for me. It is going on a week (more?) but the last two days and nights have been over the top. The energy itself is bearable. It is the information with the download that is overloading my system. I am soooooo tired right now. If I could put on the brakes I would, but apparently the only options available to me are accelerate or neutral. Neutral it is. Not interested in accelerating this right now. My mind is fried. My body hurts (back mainly). My eyes can’t focus well. I’m not hungry. My motivation is nonexistent.

This is affecting my family, too. Last night my husband laid on the floor next to me and said, “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I had an awfully unproductive weekend (insert multiple examples here). Can’t you do something to help? Do I have to ask you for help?” There I am laying in a similar unmotivated fashion thinking, huh? I told him, “First off, your mom went into the hospital. That was your main focus. Second, how am I suppose to motivate you? I can’t even motivate myself!” lol This morning he was saying the same stuff. At 6am! I told him, “You don’t have to be doing all the time. Maybe you just need to not do, feel the feelings you are having, then maybe you will know what’s really going on. Have you thought of that? Maybe you should relax?” He said, “Relaxing for me is doing something productive, like a project.” I told him, “Sounds like you need to give yourself permission to not do. Change your definition of relax.” Then I invited him to come to my mom’s with me and the kids this afternoon (so he could relax lol). He hesitated and said, “Sorry, I have too much to do today.” He should have come with us. Sigh. Gemini’s. lol

My middle son is really struggling today, too. After about 30 minutes of swimming he fell asleep and now he is sleeping again! My mom thinks he is sick but he seems fine. He is just plain exhausted. Me, too!!!

I stayed in the pool probably 2 hours. I didn’t want to get out. Then, when I did get out, I felt so heavy and tired. Afterward, the drive home was tough. I was struggling not to go OOB on the highway. The highway seems to do that to me a lot these days. I see the rows of cars, hear my music playing, and begin to lose focus. It all gets very dream-like and unreal. Sometimes I see the highway like a tunnel or feel like my car is me flying (really cool). I have to tell myself over and over, “Focus.” Thankfully, I don’t stress out or anything. And no, this happens even when I am not tired. Today I had to focus a bit harder than usual.

And the downloads coming in, well, I will just call it a “building up”. My guidance tells me we are approaching an embodiment phase. Lots of us are about to receive a massive download called our Higher Self. Ready? Me, too.

Edit: I just learned that Neptune went retrograde this evening. Since Neptune is pretty much the planet that propelled me into this spiritual journey I am on, this must be significant for me, especially considering I am entering into another spiritual upswing as mentioned in my forecast.

 

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Preparation for June Shift

If you are experiencing what I am – extreme exhaustion, crown and third-eye chakra intensity, mental fog, inability to focus or keep your eyes open – then you are in the midst of a download right alongside me. I am told mine will last two days, but I suspect that everyone’s experience will vary depending on their individual needs.

We are heading headlong into another extreme energy shift that will begin in June and last until the summer solstice. June will be monumental for many. If you have already sensed that this is true for you, then your guidance has been trying to warn you. Well here is another warning. Caution: Treacherous terrain ahead.

I see a tightrope ahead of me. Balance is key. One cannot remain on this tightrope without remaining focused and maintaining balance. On either side is a pit of molten lava. Whew! It makes me a bit nervous seeing such a vision. Hopefully there aren’t too many others facing tightropes over deep, fiery pits. lol But I am reassured that this is just a warning. The circumstances surrounding this Shift will only be to the extent that you can handle, nothing more than that.

femininepowerWomen especially will experience this Shift uniquely. We are coming into our own power and releasing the bonds that have so strictly confined our creative power and energy. We will take a stand in various ways this summer. What exactly you will feel empowered to do  will depend on what is needed for you to progress in your individual transformation.

This is not a forerunner only transformation either. As a forerunner myself, I often forget to directly address those of the other “waves” who have recently been activated. You are now coming into your own power as a group and taking up the reins of your projected paths. Some of you will be taking over where the forerunners left off – becoming gridworkers, gatekeepers, energy manipulators – you name it. But honestly, us forerunners are not all done, so the transfer will not be all at once. It doesn’t really matter, though, just know that you will hear you own “call” soon enough if you haven’t already.

 

 

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Kundalini After Effects

It’s times like these I wonder, “Why me?” lol

Two mornings ago, after my last Kundalini episode, I began to notice the tell-tell signs of a yeast infection. This is not a common occurrence for me, I’ve maybe had 3 my entire life, so I was a bit slow in figuring it out. Yesterday there was no longer any doubt in my mind. Ugh! So bought the treatment but had to wait until evening to use it. Not that a yeast infection is a big deal for me, just a minor nuisance.

Then last night, right before bed and after 30 minutes of Hatha yoga my throat began to get hot and sore. On top of that I had an unusual amount of saliva! Both right when I was trying to get to sleep. The throat soreness was bearable but the saliva kept me from falling asleep because I kept having to swallow and with each swallow I was reminded of my throat soreness.

Online research said what I was experiencing was normal. Since I have had this happen in the past I accepted this answer. The solution was taking Benadryl as it will dry out the sinuses. So that is what I did.

Then my throat started really burning, like hot hell fire burning. I had to suck on a nasty Cepocal  lozenge just to make it bearable. At the same time I guess the medication for the yeast infection exacerbated the situation because it became very uncomfortable in that area as well.

So there I was in bed, hoping for a  good night’s sleep realizing that was not going to happen. No way! I had a fire in my crotch (lol) and a fire in my throat at the same time! I’m thinking, “OMG what kind of joke is this?? Really!?”

I got maybe 4 hours of sleep total last night. Each time I would enter into a dream I would end up awake from the burning in my throat. Sigh.

I blame Kundalini for this. The last cycle of energies must have blown out a blockage in my root and fifth chakras. I’m pleased to have cleared something but not pleased that my body reacted with illness. I wish that didn’t happen. I ended up with a two week long sinus infection last time. Hoping this time the issues remain minor as I will be in Mt Shasta by Friday and really don’t want to be sick and miserable.

At least I am getting a good laugh. The universe really has a sense of humor!

 

 

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Chapter 5

So much has transpired in the last week that I tend to forget some of what I am told by my Team of guides.

One such tidbit of information was that I had begun Chapter 5. If you have been following my blog for some time, you will be familiar with the chapter theme. I have been given chapter numbers for a while now and Chapter 4 began in March, 2016.

In considering what has transpired since March this year, I will say that indeed my focus was put all on my family and spiritual transformation. Distractions were removed but it took some time on my part to remove them all. I do not recall being asked to channel much in this time period, though. I believe my distraction was the main cause. I was too fixated on a particular issue to be bothered with channeling.

Chapter 5 is about communication and interaction with others. In receiving information about this particular chapter I noticed how this chapter seems very much to correspond with the 5th chakra. In considering this it was confirmed that chapter progression is linked to the Kundalini progression upward through each chakra. This makes complete sense considering I was told there are 7 chapters total.

What I was shown/knew about this next stage in my development was that I was to work on expressing mySelf and all I had learned about mySelf via the most recent transformative process (beginning the fall of 2015). Communication is an essential part of manifestation. You must state clearly what it is you wish to manifest. This involves also being in tune with yourSelf, specifically having a clear and open heart.

Honestly, I don’t feel I have an issue with communicating. If anything, I am too blunt and honest and don’t put near enough thought into what I have to say before I say it. I blame my Sagittarius moon for this personality flaw (or gift depending on how you look at it). Yet there are things I rarely express in words with the people in my life that will need to be said at some point. Most is related to my spiritual beliefs and experiences.

Then there is the sharing of my experiences with others outside of my family. The focus is on face-to-face communication here. Getting out and meeting new people. This is also part of Chapter 5. I will be flying to Mt. Shasta, CA at the end of this week, so this part of my path is set to begin really soon.

Chapter 5’s theme also goes along really well with what my astrological forecast showed would be happening for me starting this summer and ending next summer.