Tag Archives: Astral Travel

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To the Moon

With all the excitement of my kundalini experience the other night (12/12/14) I almost forgot all about the OBE I had afterward. I specifically asked to astral. Never did I think I would astral to a place I actually intended to go!

To the Moon

I found myself in becoming more and more lucid from within a dream. I was alone in a room with very high ceilings. The walls were white and a huge screen took up the entire left side of the room. I was floating near the edge, looking over some railings at the room and taking it all in. I concluded that I must be in a theater.

I began to look closer at the screen to my left. In the center was the moon. It took up a large part of the screen and appeared to be 3 dimensional. I could see all of space spread out behind it – stars, galaxies, nebulae – all in vivid color. I was curious. Was it a picture or was it real?

I decided to fly out to it but became a bit concerned. Could I fly? Was this really a dream?

I floated up quickly and headed toward the screen. I then began falling quickly downward, so I grabbed onto the top edge. Then I realized I would not fall and that I was being silly. I let go and floated there right in front of the screen and the humungous moon. I touched the flat surface and the moon suddenly appeared more like a painting than a realistic picture.

At that moment I was certain I was OOB. With that, I felt energy build up within me. I felt like I was going to burst with excitement. I took one last look at the screen and then effortlessly flew into it.

I came out on the other side and found myself in the middle of space. In front of me was the moon, full and glorious. It was vividly white and bright and I could not help but want to fly toward her.

My awareness grew exponentially.  Maybe it was the amount of energy I was feeling or the fact that I had just experienced kundalini, but at that moment I felt powerful.

I felt my Higher Self call me back away from the scene and I immediately was sucked back into my body. I did not take much time to wake up. I obviously had done something wrong, or at least that is what it felt like.

Intention Set and Accomplished

It was not long ago that someone mentioned their OOB trip to the moon in one of the FB groups I am a member of. I recall thinking, “I want to go to the moon!” But I was worried I would freak out because outer space always feels so large and dominating to me. But I set the intention anyway. Why not?

I did not specifically set the intention to go to the moon that particular night, but the intention was set. That is how it works for me, anyway. I do not have to ask for something every night. I just ask once and then usually I eventually get it. I just wish I had actually gotten to the surface of the moon. Unfortunately, I did not specify what I wanted to do except to think, “I want to go to the moon”. And that is what I got.

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Test Preparation

My mood last night was very high. This was in complete contrast to how I felt when I awoke yesterday morning, so it was very nice. I was so awake that I struggled to fall asleep. Thankfully the meditation and self-healing work I did helped calm me down.

Dream Discussion

I had one very vivid dream that I recall from an otherwise very deep night of sleep.

In the dream I had gone to lunch with my best friend from high school. She seemed very unemotional while we were talking, almost as if she were holding a grudge against me. I, on the other hand, was very upbeat and happy, talking very fast and ignoring her odd mood.

We were sitting face to face and I was telling her about how I was going to start back on my weight lifting regime. I was explaining to her how I had been lifting successfully for one year when I found out I was pregnant and had to give it up and lose everything I had worked for. I was really proud of my accomplishments, discussing with her how I planned to start again, taking it in small steps. She did not seem too interested but I ignored this.

We continued to talk about other things, but most are lost to me now. What I distinctly remember is her and I discussing abortion. This is the friend whom I discussed in depth in another post. She had an abortion during her first marriage and regretted it later. I recall that I told her, “I don’t want to discuss the subject in depth but I take neither side in it. I can understand both sides”. As we talked about it, we went outside to the back yard and there was a small patch of grass with a very tiny hole in it. It was a one hole golf course! I told her that I had it there for my daughter to play with and sometimes she fell in (the hole was in a spot of ground connected to a tunnel that gaped open) but I would pull her out. I laughed about it, as if it were no big deal. My friend, on the other hand, seemed to get more and more serious about the subject as I talked.

Feeling her disapproval I recognized something about my past self. I had always attempted to make others happy and if I found that our views differed, I allowed them to be right by supporting them and even changing my own views. So, in the past, had someone asked me about abortion I would have learned what their viewpoint was and agreed with it being very careful so as to not make them upset by revealing my own, true views.

In seeing this about myself I cheerfully told her, “I will not tell you that I am against abortion. I am neither for or against it. It all depends on the situation. I will not change my views to make you happy”. These were not my exact words. I actually was much better at articulating what I meant in the dream. Basically, I told her about my decision to be proud of who I am and not adjust my views or Self to please others.

My friend accepted this and the discussion shifted. She seemed tired still, as if life had taken everything out of her and she had little left of herself. She brightened, though, for a minute and told me, “I am another year cancer-free. I beat the cancer”.

Upon hearing this my entire being filled with love and I told her, “I knew you wouldn’t die from it. I hope you know how important you are to me”. I hugged her and filled with such intense emotion that I began to cry. I woke up crying, still feeling the love I felt for my friend.

Upon waking I recognized I had overcome a very big obstacle in recognizing my own tendency to change for others.

little-angel-wallpaper_1280x1024_78423Test Preparation – OBE

I woke up and was wide awake for some time. Since I knew I could sleep in more I stated, “I want to go OOB”.

I felt more comfortable on my stomach and so lay in that position and fell asleep.

I recall dreaming for a while about arriving to work early. I knew I didn’t need to be there until 10am, yet I was there at the early time before things get moving. I saw my boss and another counselor talking and saw that they were holding test materials in their hands. I thought to myself, “I can help. I wonder if they want me to help them”. As I thought this, the other counselor turned and looked at me and gave me a look like, “You can’t help with this”.

Then I became somewhat lucid and was aware that I was laying in my bed and sleeping. I witnessed two individuals in the room with me. There was a male and a female. They were in the corner of my room and preparing for a test. I remember the man was being asked questions by the woman. He was reciting back to her something that resembled ancient literature. I wish I could remember what he was saying now as it feels very important! The woman would ask him something and each time he would recite back long amounts of information back to her. This went on for some time. The longer it went on, the more interested I became in it.

As if they knew I was becoming more and more interested and aware of what they were doing, they both turned their attention to me and told me they were preparing for the “test”. The test felt to be a major one similar to what schools give to students to determine if they have learned what they are suppose to in a specific subject area. In actuality, “we” (the male figure and I) were preparing for the test. I understood this without being told. It was at this point that I told them, “I want to go OOB”.

They continued to talk and prepare for the test and my attention turned inward. I was very highly aware of myself and my energy. I was also focused upon my intent to exit my body. I analyzed my energy and remember thinking, “I can exit now” and knowing/hearing, “Not yet. Wait”. I continued to sit in the energy and felt it pulse through me and shake. I am positive now that these feelings were the vibrations many feel when they are about to exit their body. They were very muted to me though I could tell that my energy was superimposed over my physical body and it felt to be moving up and down and side to side at the same time. This recognition of the vibrational frequency was very apparent to me at the time and I felt as if a part of myself were very adept at determining the exact right time to exit. I want to also say that I felt to be of two parts and the part that knew what it was doing was very obviously being listened to. This is a  HUGE win for me!

I (my Earth self) was very eager to get OOB. I (my Higher Self) remember mentally settling her, almost like reining her in like one would do to a horse ready to take off and run. I (my Earth self) was given permission to test my readiness to exit. So I kicked my feet and felt resistance. “There is no wall up against my bed!”, I thought. The movement of my astral legs out of my physical body was very distinct and I knew I could exit. With one smooth action, I rolled to my right and landed on the floor next to my bed.

The instant I hit the ground I felt very heavy and cumbersome. My eyes were open and the scene was light, not dark, but very shifty as if it were shimmering (if you watch the Lord of the Rings movies it looked like what Frodo saw when he put on the ring and was invisible). It took all my effort just to get up on my hands and knees and will myself to crawl. I instinctively knew I should not attempt to stand up. My energy was very low. I then stated, “I need more energy”. As soon as I did this it felt as if someone let go of invisible reigns and the heavy feeling lightened. I stayed on my hands and knees, though, because I sensed I still was not quite ready to stand up.

I felt as well as knew that I should focus on my breath. I also worried slightly after my last choking experience that I would not be able to breathe. I took two deep inhales and felt the breath come in and go out with ease. With each breath I felt lighter and more able to move.

I looked ahead of me intent on the door and leaving the room. I grabbed hold of the doorknob and twisted. It would not budge. I twisted again. Nothing. I had a thought, “It is locked. I won’t be able to get out”. Then a counter thought, “It will open”. I twisted the knob again and it gave way. The door opened!

I crawled out the door. As soon as I crossed the threshold I lifted up into the air and dropped my “body”. I was a ball of thought and whirled down a brightly lit hallway that had a golden hue that seemed to paint the otherwise white walls.

The hallway opened up into an unfamiliar living room. It was brightly lit and nicely furnished. The scene shimmered almost as if it were a holographic image and I took note of it. To my right was a large entertainment hutch that covered the wall. I was aware that it contained a t.v. but did not see it. My focus was upon the little girl who was standing in front of me, wide eyed. She appeared to be a toddler, about 18 months old, with short, wispy blonde hair. I thought she could be my daughter when she was little. She sure looked like her. I went toward her with a friendly smile and reached out to her saying, “Hello!” She responded by shrinking back some. She obviously did not know me. Who was she?

Unperturbed, I turned toward the entertainment system wanting to look at myself. There appeared before me a large mirror with a gold leafed frame. I got up on my tip toes to take a look at myself. I saw my face and for some reason wanted to see my body. I remember thinking, “I am naked” and then confirming I was by seeing my breasts in the mirror.

Happy with what I saw I turned to look for the little girl. She had gone to the side of the room and was looking at me. I remember speaking to her again, trying to get her to come to me. She wouldn’t move. So I began dancing and acting all silly (this always gets my kids to open up) and I heard a familiar song playing, “Let’s finish what we started” (Flaws by Bastille). I sang along and danced away happily. The little girl just watched me from the corner.

When I finished dancing I felt another presence in the room. I looked in the other corner of the room. Sitting in a recliner and looking at me was what appeared to be an older woman. Her hair was streaked with gray and cut short. I recognized her to be someone kind and safe, a caregiver to the little girl. I went over to her and she and I locked eyes. Her eyes were steely blue and intense but her communication to me through them was to come closer.

I got closer to her and we embraced. I realized that though her hair was gray, she was in fact much younger than I thought. She continued to look at me, her eyes piercing. I knew she wanted to kiss me and though I felt a bit uncomfortable I allowed her to. I showed her I was naked (I was proud of this for some reason) and she nodded approvingly. She looked me up and down as I sat in her lap (I was big but sitting in her lap like a child would). She said to me, “It looks like you are ready for next week”. I was thrown off by this statement for a moment but answered, “Yes”, a part of me recognizing this to be true but not registering what it meant. The woman pulled me close and began to suck on my left nipple. I felt embarrassed for some reason but did not withdraw because I could feel energy entering through my heart chakra. The energy shot down into my root chakra and then began to rise up into my second. It felt nice. I knew the feeling would increase if I stayed, building and exploding out of the top of my head, but I was ashamed to be allowing this woman to do what she was doing. I remember thinking, “I don’t want this”. The instant I thought it I went back to my body.

I awoke still laying on my stomach and still feeling the lingering energy in my second and third chakras. I asked my guide, “What did I do wrong?” I instantly knew I had tried to take control, go against what my Higher Self wanted. Had I stayed I would have allowed my energy to ground and expand. That was what was needed. But I was afraid of how it might look to others, specifically those who would read my blog.

Considerations

I wondered upon waking what the message about next week was about. Then I remembered next week, next Friday, is the 12th. I was pleased that the woman, whoever she was, said that I was ready. I hope so.

It is interesting to me that I was able to recognize two distinct parts of myself during this OBE. I appear to be more in communication with myself than in the past and recognized that this part of me knew more than I did. I actually deferred to “him” rather than fighting against him. I listened.

Factors Influencing Projection

Lucidity scale: 8

Intent stated?: Yes

Time to bed: 10:00pm

Time to wake: 6:00am, 7:40am

Meditation?: Yes

Physical Exercise?: Yes

Mood: Good

Body: headache, stuffy nose

Tiredness: Low

Number of wakings: 2

Technique?: No

Sleeping position: stomach

Supplements: Multivitamin, 400mg vitamin E, 1000mg Biotin, 1000mg Evening Primrose Oil,  Natural Calm, Sleepy Time Extra Tea, Benadryl 25mg, Calcium 500mg, Vitamin D 1000mg, Vitex 150mg, DonQuai 150mg

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The Trance State

In the wake of my most recent experience, I wanted to explain what exactly happened to me. I want to make it very clear that what I experienced 1. was not a dream, 2. is something anyone can do.

I began meditating in 2002. My first meditation was profound. Looking back, I believe it triggered a full opening of my 7th chakra and began the process of opening my 8th chakra. I know for sure that it propelled me into the journey of a lifetime. One. Simple, Guided. Meditation. It blew me away.

Years after this first meditation, after recognizing I had abilities beyond anything I even considered possible, I met a hypnotherapist from the U.K. He was fascinated with something called the “trance state”. I had never heard about it. He told me about how it worked. An individual was put under hypnosis through a specific guided imagery session. When done properly, they would resign their dominant personality and let Spirit take over. When this happened, Spirit, usually a spiritual guide, would talk through the individual. This is what Edgar Casey did as well as many, many others some well known, others not.

I was not sure I believed him but seeing was believing. I watched as he took a friend of mine into the trance state through hypnosis. When she let Spirit in a dramatic change occurred. Not only did her face seem to take on an altogether different look, but her voice changed. When she spoke she could even speak another language, a language she did not know! I was astonished.

I tried to tape record one session. My friend went under hypnosis and let my guide speak through her. I was super excited to hear what he had to say. He gave his real name. He spoke in Aramaic (confirmed later), and gave specifics about me that my friend couldn’t possibly have known. Afterward, eager to listen to it all over again, the tape was complete static. All that could be heard was me asking questions. The answers were all static.

I tried to go into the trance state several times. For some reason I just never could. I was terrified of letting go of control over my body. I was terrified of being “possessed”. All I was able to do was get into a semi-hypnotized state, which basically means I was really relaxed but never to the point of the trance state.

The Trance State: What is It?

Most people might think all that I just wrote is just a bunch of mumbo jumbo. A made up story or some joke played on me by my friend. However, the trance state is very real. It can be reached without hypnosis. It can be reached via meditation.

I use to think I could never get to the trance state but the more I meditated, the more relaxed I became and then I had some very profound things happen to me. My guide spoke to me, appeared to me, touched me, spoke to me in another language. My body would feel heavy and light at the same time. I would be washed in love, peace, calm and also relive past lives as if they were happening at that exact moment. All of this because of the trance state.

Technically, the trance state is just very deep relaxation. But it has been studied quite a bit and findings indicate that the brain hemispheres function together in a way they don’t normally. Brainwaves change. Brain activity lessens.

If you are curious and want to know more about the trance state and how to achieve it for yourself, check out The Trance State by Robert Bruce. The author provides different techniques to use to attain the trance state. My hypnotherapist friend used the “Steps” technique to help his clients achieve this state.

Personally, I do not use a “technique” to enter trance. I don’t think I have to, really. I entered the trance state last night when meditating. I find I enter it simply by keeping my mind clear and focusing on a repetitive thing. Last night I did self-healing. Any time my mind would wander and I would find myself day dreaming, I would simply stop myself and return to whatever I was doing before. I was sick last night, so I gave up, but I did feel the tell-tale signs of trance.

Signs of Trance

You know you are entering the trance state when you feel the following:

  • warm, cozy, and heavy feeling in your body
  • all over tingly feeling in body
  • difficulty focusing your thoughts, day dreaming
  • odd lights and/or colors flashing in your vision
  • disassociation with the physical body
  • buzzing or vibrating in the body, particularly the head
  • rapid eye movment (REM), fluttering of eyes behind eyelids
  • hypnagogic images
  • sensation of falling (sometimes)
  • odd noises, bumps, bangs, etc (indicate deep trance)
  • heart palpitations/increased heart rate

Guide Induced Trance

I have also experienced guide induced trance. This just means that my guide helped me get to the trance state. Most of my OBEs in the early days were because my guide would induce the trance state and out I would go. At the peak of this time I would literally lay down in bed, close my eyes, focus on my guide’s voice and be in the trance state almost instantly. I suspect that is where I am headed again. My guide used the trance state to communicate with me during my most recent experience. He did this often prior to 2005.

Bruce addresses the issue of falling into the trance state too easily. That is likely what happened to me prior to my shut down in 2005. For me, I was just conversing with my guide and “learning”. Now that I think about it, though, I was going into trance at least daily, sometimes more, for quite some time and I did experience a “disassociation from reality”. Ouch. I wish I had known this information then.

This is what Bruce says about too easily falling into trance:

This is an occasional side effect of long-term development work. If a person spends a lot of time in trance, the trance state eventually becomes second nature and is then very easily attained. People with this tendency can find themselves accidentally sliding into the trance state many times each day, at the drop of the proverbial hat. If not checked, this can cause frequent dissociation from reality, which is an unhealthy way to live. This can become a serious psychological disorder and may require professional treatment if it is not addressed.

Use of Trance

The trance state has a myriad of uses. The most obvious is stress reduction, relaxation, and achieving a deeper connection to ones self and God. For me, the trance state brought me closer to my guide/my Higher Self, and set me on the path of self-discovery and astral travel. My guide uses the trance state to relay messages to me in a more direct fashion. I have also communicated with Spirit to include passed loved ones via this state. While in a deep trance state I am not only able to communicate with my guide(s), but also with Spirit if I want to (which is not usually). I am also able to identify chakra imbalance, illness, weakness and other issues with my physical body. Additionally, I am better able to recognize my own thoughts, beliefs and emotions and this in turn helps me in waking life to better recognize and control my emotions and reactions to life.

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12/12/14

I had quite a few dreams once I entered dreamland, but now most are lost to me. I awoke after them and even went over and over them in my head, but I only remember tidbits of information.

The dream I remember parts of occurs at a very elaborate house – a mansion. I am there with my husband and some other people. We are sneaking around and it is very obvious we are trespassing. There are only glimpses of the dream left for me now. I recall there being a man who was very large. I knew he was going to die. I saw in a calendar in front of me and struggled to read it. I finally made out the date 12/12/14. I reconsidered, second guessing myself for a bit and thinking it must have said 12/14/14, but then I was corrected by someone (myself?) and settled on 12/12/14.

As my group was leaving one area, we drove under an arch that was heavy with ivy. The large man died and I confirmed that it was 12/12/14. I remember feeling various emotions at this but most of all I recall feeling unable to keep it from happening.

We continued on and got out of the car. We found the owners face down in a jacuzzi and I screamed, “Call 9-1-1!” Then my husband (who was my ex husband now) turned and said, “They’re alive! They were playing a joke on us!”

I struggled with my lucidity at this point. I knew I was dreaming but seemed unable to control the way my dream turned out. I felt like I was playing tug-of-war with myself. For a while I would gain control and begin to take over and then I lose it and find myself sucked back into a dream I was not interested in.

OBE

I finally was able to gain control of the dream and instantly felt the familiar sensations that come with separation from my body. I soon found the scene changed. I was inside the mansion in the living room. Sitting before me was my three-year-old son. He was watching t.v., the light from the screen illuminated him making him seem to glow with energy. The room itself was dark except for my son and the t.v. but I could make out some of the furnishings and the curtains. It resembled my Mom’s house but not exactly.

I went up to my son and he saw me and reacted with a smile. I tried to get him to come with me but he would not budge. He wanted to watch t.v. I felt very aware and wanted desperately to make the darkness fade away. I left my son to his t.v. watching and went to the front door. As I opened it I stated, “There will be light!”

When I opened the door, though, there was no light. It was dark. I did see the moon illuminating the entire scene and felt as if I were being transported into a different world. I saw strange shapes hovering and when I tried to focus upon them, thinking they were familiar objects the scene would shimmer. The energy swirled around me, pulling me out into what I was seeing, but I resisted. I felt I could not control what was happening! I didn’t panic, I just was in shock or maybe awe. It is hard to describe.

I closed my eyes and began to chant, “Om”. I could feel it resonate deep within me and all at once my core shook, but not violently. My vision blacked out and I was swept up into the vibrations very quickly, almost like I was sucked into a tornado. It was not scary but I felt as if I were broken into millions of pieces. The force of it brought me back into my body.

Disappointed I lay there in bed wondering, “What happened?” My guide said, “You cannot force two dimensions into three”. I did not understand at first but then it all began to make sense at once. I will try to explain it but it is difficult to put into words.

What I experienced before chanting “Om” was movement from a lower dimension into a higher one. From what I understood, I was moving into the mental plane and the chant accelerated the process. Since I was already a bit resistant to the movement the vibrations and odd “breaking apart of myself” caused me to withdraw and retreat back into my body.

Can’t Breathe

A bit overwhelmed by what I just experienced, I decided to go back to sleep but stated first that I wanted to go OOB. I lay on my stomach and tried to get comfortable but my nose was stuffy and my head felt heavy. I closed my eyes and drifted into the in-between state.

My guide spoke to me while I was floating there in-between. I don’t remember everything he said but as he was talking I continued to periodically mentally chant, “Om”. When I did, I became very aware of where I was and what was going on and followed through on my intent to leave my body.

The first time I noted that I was at the point where I could leave my body, I began to kick my legs and felt them separate from my physical body. I rolled out of my body, rocking back and forth and then all the way over. It took tons of effort and I recognized this meant I was in the etheric. I hit the floor and began to crawl toward the door. It felt like my face was covered or draped with heavy blankets and I tried to pull them off to see better. As I did my throat constricted and I suddenly could not breathe. I gasped for air and then quickly returned to my body and took a deep breath.

I immediately allowed myself to relax and began to “Om” again. I felt my body vibrate and took advantage of it and rolled out of my body effortlessly. I again felt heavy and pulled myself up, trying to break the invisible chains that seemed to be holding me down. I felt like I was dragging myself toward the door when I was hit again with a constriction in my throat. I remained calm and kept putting the intent out there to stay OOB but it didn’t work. My body pulled me back and I gasped for air again.

This happened a couple of more times, each time I succeeded to consciously leave my body. Each time my throat constricted and I stopped breathing. I do have a head cold but it is not a bad one, but perhaps that is what caused the constriction? It really felt as if my physical body stopped breathing when I left it. Scary to think of it but I wonder if I were able to ignore my body if I would have suffocated?

Messages

There are some messages I received while in-between. I managed to remember most of them.

One message was about the 12/12/14 date. My guide told me, “The veil will be lifted” when I asked him what the significance of this date was. For me, the veil is the in-between state that I often find myself in when I meditate or am about to go OOB but my guide describes it as a separation between my physical and spiritual. I guess I will find out on the 12th. Perhaps I am not completely understanding what “the veil” is?

I was not concerned about this message but then was told, “You cannot stop it”.

Finally, I was told that I needed to stop trying to control my OBEs, that this is why I continue to remain at the same level experience after experience. The actual words I heard were, “You can’t control it”. This bothered me because I was always led to believe that I had control of myself when OOB and that all I had to do was set an intent and I could go wherever I wanted. As I questioned my guide about what he meant, I understood it to mean that whatever is happening to me is not something my Earth self has any control over. The message is that it WILL happen whether I like it or not.

Factors Influencing Projection

Lucidity scale: 5 increasing to 8

Intent stated?: Yes

Time to bed: 10:00pm

Time to wake: 4:00am; 6:00am, 7:30am

Meditation?: Yes

Physical Exercise?: Yoga

Mood: normal

Body: headache, stuffy head cold, body aches from exercise

Tiredness: Low

Number of wakings: 3

Technique?: No

Sleeping position: Left side, stomach

Supplements: Multivitamin, 500mg vitamin E, 1000mg Biotin, 1000mg Evening Primrose Oil,  Natural Calm, Sleepy Time Extra Tea, Benadryl 25mg, Calcium 500mg, Vitamin D 1000mg, Vitex 150mg, DonQuai 150mg

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Madonna

Yesterday was a long day. We spent most of the day at my Mom’s for Thanksgiving and then went directly to the church to have another Thanksgiving there. We did not get home until late and then I could not fall asleep. I must have had too much caffeine. I drank mostly iced tea the entire day.

I felt my guide close and also sensed quite a few more in Spirit, about 9 total. I felt I needed to meditate and so I did, trying to quiet my mind. However, as soon as I would get to a quieted mind my guide would become more noticeable. Finally, I just listened to him rather than try to quiet my mind.

In my mind I saw a hand extended to me and felt I should take it. I reached out with my own mental hand and took it. When I did, I felt a surge in my heart chakra that lingered and expanded. It did not fill me up with the usual intensely, wonderful feeling, though. Instead, it felt blocked and dulled. I then began to feel an energy in my feet and legs. It was heavy and tingly. When I felt it, I instinctively began to urge it upward, slowly. I felt the energy slowly move up into my solar plexus and then into my heart but I could not get it to extend any higher up. I was able to get some energy to move up, but only small amounts. I knew this meant I had too many blockages.

I spent some time doing self-healing. I don’t know how long I spent, but eventually I must have begun to doze off because I suddenly had a vision of my baby struggling to breathe. It woke me suddenly and I flew out of bed. I checked on my baby and he was fine but I was wide awake and on mommy alert. Why did I get such a vision? Was this a warning that the “test” I have been dreaming of will be that I lose my baby to SIDS?

I could not go to sleep after that. I was a ball of worry and suddenly became super aware of how my body was feeling. I could not breathe out of one nostril and the other one was so dry it hurt to breathe. I also had a headache. I noted the time and it was midnight.

Continued Energy Work During Dreamtime

I slept fitfully and had odd dreams, most of which I cannot remember fully. I do recall dreaming of a friend from high school who I use to work with as waitress. She was being asked to go with two women. They appeared to be making sexual advances upon her at first but when I studied them closer, I realized they just wanted to have her company as a friend. I urged her to go with the woman even though she was very afraid for some reason. She left with them, looking back at me and I was filled with huge amounts of sympathy and could feel my heart chakra radiating energy out toward her.

In another dream I do not fully recall, I was driving a car down a road with high, white sides. It reminded me a tunnel without a top. I watched as a man in uniform slowly removed orange and white cones from a section of the road ahead of me. The section had two off-shoots, one to the right and another to the left. The left side had been opened up but the man was still removing the cones from the right.

As I approached I put on my brakes when I saw that the right tunnel had not been cleared of cones. I stopped completely and another person in a white sedan who I knew had been following me barreled through the right side, tossing the cones and then flying high up into the air. Her car collided with the concrete of a nearby building. When I looked up, I noticed the car had changed to a motorcycle. It was completely totaled but my friend was unharmed. When I approached her and asked if she was ok, she said she was and then said she had to get out of there before they found her out. Then her motorcycle was miraculously repaired and I jumped on and drove it down stairs. The stairs turned to slides and I followed them down for what seemed like forever.

I awoke at that point and could still feel the energy lingering in my heart chakra.

ThirdEyeMadonna – Lucid Dream to OBE

I fell back to sleep for some time and then awoke at 6am. My kids were up and noisy and I could not fall back to sleep. I put a pillow over my head and tried to sleep. I stated mentally, “I want to go OOB”.

The next thing I remember was sitting in a chair next to my bed. I heard music and a woman was next to me and then seemed to be all around me. It was dark and I could only see shadows of varying shades of gray. I sensed the woman more than I saw her and recognized that she was tapping headphones that were on my head. The music sounded like dance music and the beat was unfamiliar. The woman asked me, “Do you know this song?” I recognized her then as Madonna and I told her, “No. Sorry”.

I heard the music continue to play and recognized some of the words but most are lost to me now. The song was not one I had ever heard but I do recall hearing the word “star”. The Madonna woman then asked me, “Do you like my music?” I said, “I don’t usually listen to your kind of music but I am starting to”.

Then I was out of the chair and the “Madonna” woman was in the chair. I was trying to see her more clearly but could not make out her face. She reached out to me and pulled me toward her and I sensed a sexual inquiry from her. I let her pull me close and hug me. I recall seeing her neck and noticing she was wearing earrings and a necklace. I looked at the necklace while she attempted to encourage me to kiss her. I did kiss her but something felt very wrong about it. It was then I knew I was dreaming and that I did not want this to for myself. I pulled away from her.

Now completely “awake” within my dream, I felt the woman’s presence change. It was still dark but I turned around to look and see who had replaced her as the energy felt masculine. I saw a man in her place and his energy suggested he wanted me to have sex with him. He came towards me and I let him get close enough to touch me. I looked at his face and saw his features were angular and he had blondish hair that was cut short. He reminded me of someone but I did not know who. He did not say anything to me but I could feel his intentions. They felt odd to me, like he was hiding something of his intentions and I knew quickly that he was a sexual deviant of some kind and that he was not someone I wanted to be around.

At that time I also recognized I was standing right next to my slumbering physical body. I was so close that I could feel the pull of it and I kept thinking I needed to get away from it. The man continued to will me toward him but I did not like the way he felt and wanted nothing to do with him. I decided at that point to get away from my slumbering body and the man so I went to the bedroom door. I tried to open it but found that the doorknob was on the wrong side of the door. It took me a while to realize this but when I did, I opened the door, went out and down the stairs. I could feel the man behind me and a part of me looked behind me while another saw straight in front of me (I think this is the 360 degree vision people speak of having in astral). I moved so swiftly that I do not recall seeing the stairs at all. I just recall being downstairs and seeing my two oldest children watching television.

I went out the front door and down several steps. These steps are not there in real life so I am not sure what house I was in, but it was not mine. I stopped in my tracks when I was confronted with a completely different place than I expected. The residential street I assumed I would be on was replaced with a very urban street lined with brightly lit up buildings that stretched for miles in both directions. The place was familiar and I knew far to the right was a tall, silver building that towered above all the others. The sky was clear and I could see thousands of stars spread out in front of me. It was as if the sky went on forever! The air was crisp and my vision was crystal clear despite it being dark. I was overcome with awe as I took it all in.

I instantly wanted to stay there as long as I could and so looked down at my hands to try and increase my awareness. I looked down not knowing what to expect after finding gloved hands in my last OBE. I only saw my hands, just as they appear in real life. There wasn’t even any glow to them. I found this peculiar but did not let it bother me.

My vision remained crisp and I took note of how real and solid everything felt. Had I not known I was OOB I would have thought I was awake! I looked from my hands to a large building across the street. It looked like a very pricy, old hotel from another era. It was lit up with yellowish lighting and was a spectacular sight. I wanted instantly to explore it.

As soon as I set the intention to fly over to explore the building I felt my conscious energy coalesce into a mental ball. I did not feel my astral form at all. It was as if all of my consciousness was a mass of energy. The mental me was pulled upward as if through a siphon and there was a force that built up as my consciousness rose up. I had no control of this it seemed and went quickly upward and then into my sleeping body. I did not even feel the familiar settling of energy like normal. I was just instantly back in my body and fully aware.

Considerations

Upon waking I had a headache and was very thirsty. I also felt like I had been sleeping in a bad position as my lower body was stiff. I began to think of the short OBE I had an how weird it was. I thought about not writing it down because it seemed so boring but I thought perhaps I should focus on how lucid I felt and the senses I was able to utilize.

My perceptions are mostly limited when I am OBE. I usually have vision, sometimes clear sometimes not so clear. I also often can feel others and objects without a problems. Taste is also not usually an issue but is not often used unless I am eating something. Hearing is almost nonexistent. I hear most everything in my mind. External noise is a consciousness trigger for me and usually pulls me back into my physical body quite quickly. I have heard some amazing things OOB but it has been a long while. The music I heard in this experience was muted but I did hear it. I do not recall using my sense of smell often, but I have smelled things. For example, in one OBE I smelled the rain and felt it as it hit my body. I also heard it as it came down, a quiet trickling sound. This was one of my OBEs where every one of my senses was utilized. I would have given it a 10 on lucidity.

I recognize that this OBE was one of the few where I was quite lucid and was increasing in awareness very quickly. I believe this happened too quickly which is why I came back into my body the way I did. I was super aware of my energy and how it moved and then it was as if no transition at all occurred when I reentered my body. I was simply “awake”.

The recognition of myself as energy rather than a body was also interesting to me. I have only felt the “siphoning” feeling once and it scared me. In that experience I was sleeping when suddenly I was awakening by feeling my consciousness being siphoned upward and out of my body. I felt like liquid energy dripping upward and out of my body. I recall thinking I was dying and freaking out. I have never felt that again until this morning’s experience but this one was in the opposite direction, back into my body.

Factors Influencing Projection

Lucidity scale: 5 increasing to 8

Intent stated?: Yes

Time to bed: Midnight

Time to wake: 4:00am; 6:00am, 8:00am

Meditation?: Yes

Physical Exercise?: None

Mood: normal

Body: headache

Tiredness: Low

Number of wakings: 3

Technique?: No

Sleeping position: Left side

Supplements: Multivitamin, Mineral supplement, Natural Calm, Sleepy Time Extra Tea, Benadryl 25mg, Calcium 500mg, Vitamin D 1000mg, Vitex 150mg, DonQuai 150mg

by

Beauty in the Dark

Before I go into detail on my morning’s excursion, I want to talk a bit about my day yesterday. My youngest (he’s almost 8 months now) has been going through a clingy, whiny stage for about a month now. Yesterday was probably the worst so far. I could not get anything done without having to endure wails of agony from my son. He also refused to take a nap and would not eat. I assume he is teething but there is no tooth or even swelling of the gums and one would think after a month of this a tooth would appear if it were teething! I spent most of the day catering to his needs. In between that I also had to cater to my older two children while fighting bouts of frustration and a feeling of overwhelm that kept rising up into my throat almost choking me.

Finally, after an entire day of enduring screaming and whimpering I took my baby to a room away from his siblings for some mommy time. He instantly cheered up, roaming around and playing but always coming back to mommy. I got out a book and read to him and he became elated, jumping up almost to standing and clapping his hands. He was so happy that later, when we ate dinner, he ate so much food I thought he would burst.

As the evening came to a close, my little baby settled down quietly and fell asleep earlier than usual, allowing me and my husband some alone time which was much needed. We ended up having some good conversations and for a very nice end to the day.

When I went to bed I did some yoga and read a bit of a book. I then set my intention: “I want to find my core self and continue whatever healing that has been started”. I did not set an intention to astral as I really did not have interest in it.

False Awakening

I awoke once at around midnight and then resumed sleep without incident.

I heard my baby crying very loudly for what seemed to be a long time. I ignored the screams and covered my head with a pillow, hoping my husband would take care of it. The screams continued for a while and then I heard the door open. I heard my husband come in and felt him set the baby on the bed. The baby continued to scream and my husband said to me, “You deal with him” and left the room. I sat up and grabbed the baby and had many thoughts hit me at once. I was so tired and just wanted to sleep and wanted to yell at my husband to come get the baby. I thought about doing this but felt conflicted because I knew my husband was frustrated and that I needed to take over.

I felt hazy at this time and struggled to understand what was going on. Part of me knew I was sleeping but the other part was sure I was awake.

I opened my eyes and heard my baby crying. I suddenly realized I had been dreaming and that none of the incident with my husband had even occurred. I suddenly became very concerned and got up to check on them. I found my husband soothing the baby downstairs and I let him be, sending him the thought, “Well done”. I noticed it was 5:50am, so I went back to bed.

Too Many Children

I could not go back to sleep at first. I was really cold and could not seem to get warm. I also kept hearing everything that was going on in the house. All my children soon got up and I heard the pitter patter of tiny feet along with talking (my oldest seems always to yell when she talks). I got irritated and began to curse my life silently to myself. I remember thinking, “I wish I had never had children. I wish I had never started this life”. Then I rolled over, put a pillow over my head and tried to sleep. I set an intention, “I want to go OOB”.

The next thing I remember is being outside with a group of people, most of them children. A story was played out in front of my eyes. It only lasted a second, like it had instantly been downloaded into my mind. I knew that a couple had started a family and had child after child very quickly. They had five children, the youngest just a baby. I saw in front of me these children and the couple. There were twin girls standing in front of me and a woman who was taking care of the baby.

I was semi-lucid as I heard myself talking with a woman while watching the scene in front of me. I saw the baby up close and knew he was a vampire baby. I shuddered at the thought. The woman taking care of him was not doing a good job and the next time I saw the baby he had become thin and gaunt and very close to death. The woman taking care of him was not concerned. I remembering thinking the baby was only half human.

The conversation in my mind continued. She recounted the story of the family, saying they got married quickly and jumped right into having child after child without giving themselves much time to bond with one another. I recognized this story as my own and remember saying to her, “I chose that adventure”, instantly recognizing that I was seeking adventure in life and grabbed onto an “acceptable” adventure which was getting married and having children. I did this without thinking of the long-term consequences and now I was stuck in the “adventure” and it was not so much fun.

Again the carriage with the baby came into my vision. I peered into it, assuming I would see a skeleton baby since he was surely almost dead the last time I saw him. I even envisioned the skeleton to prepare myself for the horror of it. Instead I saw only a blanket, no baby. I inquired where he was and the woman said, “Over there” and I looked and saw a plump little blond boy crawling around on top of a changing table. I asked, “He was almost dead the last time I saw him!” The woman replied, “That was his old caregiver. She neglected him a lot. He is fine now”. I saw the boy’s rosy cheeks and smile and wondered about him. The woman said, “He has a lot of energy”. I watched as the boy scooted to the side of the table and wiggled around. He did have a lot of energy. I was then aware that this baby needed a lot of attention and needed patience and help so he could learn to channel the energy properly.

Alaska – OBE

Something about the dream conversation shifted my awareness and the scene instantly changed to a new one. I found myself inside a house. The lights were out but I could make out the furniture and surroundings. It was a nice place and very cold. I was standing in the kitchen and could see the silhouette of sliding glass doors to my right. Moonlight poured through the window and illuminated the kitchen bar in front of me.

I was in the middle of another conversation with an invisible woman. Lost inside my mind, I talked to her until her voice was gone and I was talking to myself. I was rejecting the idea of my current “adventure”, mad at myself for taking on so much. One part of me was the voice of reason, the other part (the me in the dream) was the stubborn child.

Suddenly an idea came to me that I should look at buying a house. It was in Alaska and I got very upset by this. I looked down and saw I was holding a real estate brochure for a home. I glanced at it and saw it was a very nice house and a part of me was interested in buying it. I remember saying, “No! I don’t want to buy a house! I don’t want to live in Alaska!” I closed the brochure but my interest was peaked and I began to think about living in Alaska. I thought of the long winters and balked at the prospect of driving on icy roads again. I rejected that part. Then I thought, “I want to lay in the sun” and thought of going outside in the sun and then remembered I couldn’t do that in Alaska. I remembered when I lived there. The isolation. The darkness. I didn’t want that. Then I remembered I use to go to tanning beds and thought, “I could go to a tanning bed”. I looked at the brochure again and saw the price for the house was $1.5 million but then the price vanished and I couldn’t find it. That was way too much for a house!

Something clicked at this point and I looked at the glass doors and said aloud, “This is a dream”. Instantly aware I was creating all of this, I immediately recognized I was wearing heavy winter clothing. I tore off an imaginary coat and began to rip off what appeared to be a hat and goggles. I then went through the glass doors and outside, still tugging at my imaginary winter garb. I felt shrouded in heavy winter clothing and wanted it off.

Outside the moonlight was still illuminating everything quite well and I saw the yard was surrounded with trees and tall shrubs. The air was crisp and I knew it was still summer. My vision was blurry and I again took off goggles of some kind. My vision instantly cleared and I blinked a few times. I then looked more closely at the shrubbery and thought, “I should go that way” but then stopped myself thinking, “I don’t want to go that way” thinking that way meant I would be alone. I instantly wanted to go to the front yard so turned that way. I saw a privacy fence between myself and the front. I had the idea that if I crossed the fence I would find other people and not be alone. I decided to jump the fence and propelled myself upward. I went up quite fast, flying up so high that I worried I would not come down. To my delight, I did a flip mid-air and landed on the other side of the fence. In front of me I saw an open yard dotted with trees but I was still alone and it was still dark. I brought my hands up to look at them as it usually helps me feel more solid but when I brought my hands up instead of seeing glowing hands I saw heavily gloved hands. Disappointed and wondering why the gloves were still there (hadn’t I taken them off?) I decided I would try singing as it seems to always help me gain awareness. I launched myself into the air and began to sing loudly, “Ah ah ah” (like from the Little Mermaid). I began to be pulled upward very fast and I closed my eyes as I sang but my voice kept cracking and I could not get the cracking sound to go away. I kept singing, though, hoping I would escape the place I had been in.

I felt my energy settle back into my sleeping body and opened my eyes.

Beauty in the Dark

When I awoke I was pleased that my intention to astral had worked but I was not pleased that I had seemed to get nowhere in my experience. I also was upset to find myself yet again in Alaska. What did Alaska represent? Being alone. It represented all that I had felt when I had lived there in reality. I had gone in search of adventure but found the adventure was shrouded in loneliness. I had thought I could handle being alone but it had nearly killed me. The new adventure I had sought, having a family, was also shrouded in loneliness, but of a different kind. It was more bearable but I was drowning and felt similar emotions to how I felt when I lived in Alaska. In my OBE I had tried to escape the trap I had put myself in but could not. I felt burdened by a heavy shroud of winter clothing yet I felt cold still. It was very representative of my life and how heavy the burden of it felt. I could not free myself of it and the OBE seemed to indicate trying to escape was not the solution.

As I type this I am reminded of a song I wrote when I was living in Alaska. Back then I had yet to connect with my guide yet I was drawn to write music. I wrote many songs, the lyrics seeming to just flow out of me. I found moments of joy in the mostly sad songs I wrote. One of my favorites was called Beauty in the Dark.

Beauty in the Dark

I understand your sorrow
I understand your pain
I want to see you smile
I want to hold your hand.
And although this place is colder
And darker than where we’ve been
I’ll take you somewhere warmer
Be your light
In the dark.

Chorus

Take the darkness and wrap it around you
And you’ll find beauty in the dark
Don’t let the winds of the arctic prevent you
From searching for your heart

(Alternate ending)
I’ll find a way
I’ll take you there
Find somewhere where you belong.

Can’t you see the colors
Of the Northern Lights
They will offer comfort
In the dead of night.
And as the wind blows memories
Of places and times gone by
My love will be a blanket
Of warmth, of warmth.

Let me kiss the teardrops
From your swollen eyes
There is nothing to fear
It will be alright.
And as the days grow longer
In the Land of the Midnight Sun
Our love will grow much stronger
Lead us on, and on.

Chorus

Look to the bands of color
That paint the northern sky
A canvas filled with wonder
If you would only try.

Chorus (with alternate ending)

I guess I need to find beauty in the dark again.

Lucidity scale: 5

Intent stated?: Yes

Time to bed: 9:30pm

Time to wake: 5:50am; 7:30am

Meditation?: None

Physical Exercise?: Yoga

Mood: normal to low

Body: muscle aches

Tiredness: Moderate

Number of wakings: 2

Technique?: No

Sleeping position: stomach

Supplements: Natural Calm, Sleepy Time Extra Tea, Benadryl 25mg, Calcium 500mg, Vitamin D 1000mg, Vitex 150mg, DonQuai 150mg

by

Merging Unveiled

A while ago now, my guide told me that he and I were in the process of “merging”. I never quite understood everything about merging, but I did recognize that it meant that he would no longer be viewed by me as separate from me. For some reason, the idea of merging was scary to me, especially the thought of losing my companion traveler who has always been by my side in this life.

Recently the subject of merging was brought up in my astral projectors FB group by a friend, Jurgen Ziewe, who is a well-known author of books on astral projection and higher consciousness. He is in the process of writing a book about his personal experience of merging with his Higher Self who he calls his “silent companion”. The discussion question that was asked was about spirit guides. Several individuals wanted more information on spirit guides. I responded by saying, “[My guide] is the quiet inner voice that answers questions I pose to myself both during OBE and out. I found mine through meditation.”

This response was that I was actually describing my Higher Self. To that I replied:

That is what a spirit guide is, at least in my understanding. My primary guide tells me often “I am You” and after this experience I asked what the energy I felt was when I hugged him and he said, “It was You”. I have other guides who he refers to as Assistants. I do not really concern myself with them, though I see them in my dreams as well, especially a female one with an M name. Some say we have a separate guide and I am bit confused as to if this is true since I am regularly told we are all One and separateness is an illusion. I suppose then that the name “guide” is confusing because of this illusion of separateness. From the way my guide feels, he has been with me always and always will be. He is an aspect of myself who Remembers all that Is while I am the aspect that has chosen to Forget. I wish I could remember the story he told me about those who Remember and those who Forget, but it makes so much sense and explains the separateness that we on Earth have chosen for ourselves.

That is when I got the great explanation about merging and what it means from Jurgen:

Yes Dayna, the “guide” feels like a separate presence and it is easy to consider it as such and of course there are no guarantees that they are not separate, which can make it all a bit more complicated. The golden man in your experience could be a manifestation, but If there are guides we perceive as separate and they actually are separate they only serve one purpose, to connect you ultimately to your higher self. I always referred to this awareness of “not being alone”, of this presence in my life, as my “Silent Companion”.

I had a guide before I became aware of this permanent presence in my life. I first came into contact with him, whom I regarded as “my teacher” during an OBE. He was most definitely a separate entity, with his own history, raucous character, attitude, a chap I recognized as a very old friend. He poked fun at me and played games, but always with a lesson attached. He then came to me regularly for several months and put me through a training program, which allowed me later to enter much higher dimensional levels.

That was before my so called “silent companion” showed up, when this happened he no longer featured. Though on occasion other people showed up during OBEs, who took me to places and showed me various things. One of them identified himself as Phil, with a completely different personality to the first guy. He too disappeared, but during the waking hours and the day it was always my silent companion which was the more constant aspect in my life and finally, over a year ago I clearly got to know it. There was no longer any doubt what this aspect was as I merged fully into it, my higher self.

So I still think there are different awarenesses we can be linked to, some are friends, helpers, guides, but I think they respectfully step aside when our awareness of who we are, rises to the fore and we have a direct link to the higher self, the “knower”. You become more confident in that knowledge, but also more humble as your old identifications are gradually pushed to one side. The purpose of the silent companion is union, which is when we merge fully with our higher self.

When this process has finally tipped the balance in favour of our higher self our awareness turns into an awareness of “the stillness of the present moment”, constantly, day and night, unmistakably, unshakable, always, permanently, moment by moment, without break and no knowledge or any clue even of how we could possibly get back to our old separateness. We don’t even remember any more, what it was like as our old self, because it was such a flimsy artifice. Life then changes for good, without return.

I captured it here in the twelve points I noted down, how life is transformed when we merge with our silent companion, which turns into the stillness: The Higher Consciousness.

I am still absorbing and digesting the validation and information I received from this FB conversation. As you all know, I do not often go out in search of books or articles that relate to my experiences. I rarely feel drawn to do this and when I have questioned myself about these tendencies the answers I receive indicate that there is no need for that which is already understood and accepted from the Self. When I have sought after validation through outside sources (outside myself that is) I have found my confidence in myself becomes muddled with questions and self-doubt which only serves to slow down my own spiritual progress. However, such as is this circumstance, lately my answers come to me from without and often do so in larges chunks such as is this case.

It is obvious to me now that merging is part of the process of awakening; IS the awakening. I have noticed that my guide (higher self) is much closer and more ever-present than the previous 7 years. I also recognize that the message I received back in June of this year about my upcoming “death” was in fact not a physical death but a death of the me that I have been throughout this life. I suspected this.

Jurgen describes this “death” of transformation perfectly:

It was as if a cage of frosted glass, which had obscured my vision for so long, had been shattered into billions of tiny pieces and there was simply no longer a way of putting them back together again to form the old frosted cage. Whereas in the past I would take glimpses into higher states of awareness, spontaneously or through meditation, I was inevitably posted back into my old mundane self, striving to find my way back into the clear light of reality which was unimpeded by viewpoints, judgements or personal issues. Now it felt as if the bridges back had been incinerated and for the time being at least I appeared to be permanently located on a new viewing platform with no roadmap back to my old self and any interest whatsoever in returning to my old ways had simply dissipated.

I was given a time period of four years from this past June until the time of “death”. It seems a long time but to be told that it is coming is a gift. My guide spoke to me last night as has been the usual in the evenings since the birth of my son. He reassured me that the coming changes are good and to be patient with myself as I struggle through some of the difficulties of accepting myself back into myself. I asked how to invite him in, and he told me, “It is not something that can be explained in words but something that must be experienced to understand”. Yet I saw in my mind a visual of opening my heart and accepting myself without fear or judgment. With this vision I recognized how much I fear what I will find when I open up to all that I am, have been and will be. To do so without judgment is perhaps the most difficult task of them all because it comes with the human tendency to label ourselves and our choices as “good” or “bad”. For so long it has been whispered to me when I criticize myself for a “wrong” decision, “There are no mistakes, only choices”. How does one step back and view life without labels? How does one ignore the illusions and accept what is before them as it IS with love and acceptance? I shudder to think of the lives I have lived (that I remember) where I have been so horrible that the mere memory of it causes me to withdraw and contract from myself. I can’t do this if I want to reunite with myself. What a huge feat it seems yet my guide reassures me that it is achievable.

by

Contract

Yesterday, for our 7th anniversary, my husband and I decided to try indoor skydiving. I actually had the idea pop into my head about a week ago. It kept coming to me so I told my husband and he set it up. He was really excited about it. I was a bit nervous but I kept hearing my guide encourage me to do it so I went ahead.

When we got to the facility I was nervous and my palms got all cold and clammy. I hate it when that happens. All the others in our group were kids, too, which was weird. The instructor was a blonde woman from Australia and very likeable.  She immediately reassured me that I would do good saying women are the best flyers. By the time we were waiting our turn in the wind tunnel waiting area I was calm. I kept thinking, “I do this all the time in my dreams” and also decided that I would just do breathing and relaxation techniques while flying because the instructor said relaxing was the key to good flight.

When it was my turn I just jumped in and at first was unsteady but found it felt a lot like being in a deep pool of water. The air folded around me like a blanket. I felt so light! It so reminded me of times when I would fly through the sky in astral. If only the tunnel sides had projected blue skies with clouds, it would have been just the same feeling!

On the my second turn I did much better and was able to maintain flight on my own and even go higher. I noticed I kept holding my breath and had to remind myself to breath more than once. The master instructor asked me if I wanted a trip high up into the tunnel. I had watched him take flyers and spin them circularly all the way up and down two to three times. The speed of the wind was also increased and the flyers I saw doing it, including my husband, looked to be completely thrilled throughout it. So, I agreed to let him take me for a “spin”.

He barely touched me and I began to spin very fast and then I felt him grab hold of me and the circular spinning motion intensified. I went so fast I began to scream from the thrill of it. I could not see much as I spun, but it didn’t matter, it was so freeing and wonderful! I could have stayed in there for much longer than my 2 minutes.

My guide was right. This was a good experience for me and my husband. I have not had that much fun with him in a long time.

Dream: Daddy’s Missing

I went to bed last night and set an intention. I stated: “I want to work on healing my past (memory inserted of past life). I want to experience what I can of this OOB if possible”.

I fell asleep quickly. I had a dream about my father but I never once saw him in my dreams. Instead, I got news that my father was missing and had been missing for over a year. He had been overseas on an island country doing work. He had an apartment and everything but had just up and vanished one day. In the dream I recall that he had come to my high school graduation but I had not seen him since.

There was an investigation. I remember seeing the ocean and crossing it, going to an island. I drew in closer to the island and went to my father’s apartment. I looked around and through his things. His phone was there and I noticed it was out of service. I looked through his bed sheets and under the mattress. I found a book under the mattress and opened it up to find some slips of paper that he had written on. One was scribblings and the other had numbers as if he were doing accounting. I remember the numbers very vividly. It was amounts of money in the thousands with deductions in the hundreds. I concluded that he had lost money on a job but do not remember what I concluded about the rest of it.

His apartment rent had been paid for and had been for a year despite him being missing. Everything was where he had left it, untouched. I found this perplexing and walked around a bit, talking to the landlord who explained that my father had made sure that everything was paid for while he was gone. I went back to his phone and found it reactivated. This gave me hope.

mainpuraOBE: Contract

I awoke from this dream to sounds of two screaming children. My oldest son was crying for daddy and my baby was downstairs trying to get up. I went and got the baby and soothed him and put my toddler back to bed. It was 6:00am and so I went back to sleep.

Within minutes it seemed I was back in dreamland but this time I was lucid and becoming more so. I felt sluggish and heavy but separate from my physical body. I recognized I was in bed with my husband and we were talking about something. He said to me, “You forgot to sign” and put in front of me a paper with lots of typed words and a signature line that was highlighted.

I looked at it and knew it was a contract of some kind. I then saw my signature was already there and said to him, “I already signed, see?” I showed him my signature. Then I looked and saw that the other side of the opened “book” had an identical contract on it. This one was my husband’s. I said to him, “You are the one who hasn’t signed yet” and pointed to the highlighted signature line showing him it was blank.

I then felt my energy shift and then shift again. It felt like part of me was being pushed or nudged in one direction while another part of me was staying still. This was a bit unsettling but it caused me to gain more awareness and I wanted that. I could not see well but I could feel my body and the bed. I then willed for my husband to touch me. I wanted to feel it and so know what I was experiencing was real.

I soon felt a hand cover my own. For some reason my hand felt very small, like a child’s and the hand that covered mine also did. I closed my fingers around the hand tightly and felt a wonderful energy pouring into me. I let the energy flow up into my midsection and enjoyed it for a moment. Then I felt a hand touch my side. It was warm and larger than the child’s hand I had been clasping. I turned around and my astral vision came on suddenly. I saw next to me a man with golden skin. It was shimmering and sparkly, like he was more energy than form. He was not wearing any clothing so his entire body was this gold, shimmering energy. He was smiling and sitting very close to me. I expected to see my husband, since that is who I had been talking to about signing the contract. That is who I saw at first, and I was filled with happiness. But as I looked closer, trying to make out his features, his face shifted and blurred, looking to be several faces in one.

I did not care who it was that was with me, I just knew he was part of me and wonderful. I fell into his gold, shimmering arms and felt them wrap around me. When we embraced, the wonderful energy poured into me again. I kept waiting for it to shoot up through my heart and crown but it never did. Instead it settled in my mid-section and radiated outward. It was a different feeling than what I have felt come from my heart. I felt safe and loved and the feeling was warm and comforting. It said to me, “I am here. Everything is okay”.

As is normal for me when I come in direct contact with my guide, I began to gain awareness very quickly and all at once. I immediately lost the safe feeling as the energy shifted and I came quickly back into my physical body/awareness. I opened my eyes and was not upset that I was waking but I did feel spiritually tired and depleted, not wanting to return to physical reality.

Husband’s Dream

I asked my husband if he had any dreams about me and he stated that he did. He told me that in his dream I was his instructor and teaching him how to fly. I told him about my OBE and the contract he had yet to sign. I asked him if he thought maybe he was deciding if he wanted to learn from me since he had a dream about me being his instructor. He thought maybe he was. I find it interesting that he had his dream at the same time I had my OBE.

Factors Influencing Projection

Lucidity scale: 5

Intent stated?: Yes

Time to bed: 9:30pm

Time to wake: 6:00am; 7:30am

Meditation?: None

Physical Exercise?: Indoor skydiving

Mood: normal to low

Body: headache, lower back ache

Tiredness: Moderate

Number of wakings: 2

Technique?: No

Sleeping position: stomach

Supplements: Natural Calm, Sleepy Time Extra Tea, Benadryl 25mg, Calcium 500mg, Vitamin D 1000mg, Vitex 150mg, DonQuai 150mg

by

Bullet Holes

Before I went to bed last night, I did not read as is my usual routine. The book I have been reading has me a bit overwhelmed and I need time to process it. So instead of reading, I decided to ask to astral. I said, “I would like to confront my fears and defeat my demons.” I focused on my third chakra as I mentally said this. Then I said, “I would like to see my core Self”. After I said this, I had a bit of fear rise up within me. It was surprising and my guide said, “Okay”.

Finding Daddy

I awoke sometime around midnight and do not remember my dreams. I went back to sleep almost instantly.

I slowly became more and more aware as I was dreaming. At first, the dream is a haze but I do recall being outside of a row of houses in a fairly nice neighborhood. There was a park with bright green grass across from the particular house I was standing in front of. The day was bright but not too bright and I had a feeling it was mid-morning.

I was with several other people, but I do not remember any except one man and one woman. The man was who I was speaking with the most at this time. We were discussing OBEs and how to initiate one. I don’t recall who came up with the idea to try, but I laid down on the front steps of the house after recognizing the heaviness I felt and commenting that I needed to use it to my advantage. At the time I really do not recall feeling “heavy” or anything of the sort, though, which is odd to me.

When I laid down, I close my eyes in the dream and could feel the heavy feeling I had just commented to my friend about. The scene was still there but turned gray as I closed my astral eyes. I was not fully aware just yet but was attempting to bring more consciousness into the experience and I am assuming this was the method that made most sense at this time. I felt my “body” but it was not my physical body. It felt heavy and cumbersome and now that I look back on that moment, I believe I was feeling my etheric body. I don’t remember much about the shift but when it happened I instantly recognized I had achieved my goal of going OOB. All I recall of the feeling now is a funny shifty energy similar to what I feel when I exit my physical body.

When I got OOB (and it is funny because I believe I already was OOB prior) I was elated. I had instant astral vision and was facing the vivid green grass of the park. The sky was blue and spotted with clouds and I reveled in the clarity that surrounded me as I have not had much of that in a while. I could still hear the friend who I had been with but I don’t remember now what he said to me. I turned around, though, suddenly wondering if I could get a glimpse of my body. I looked toward the steps of the house where I knew I had fallen asleep and saw a body, curled up underneath a heavy green and blue blanket, my body!

After seeing my body, for some reason I was surrounded by several men of various ages and we all set off through the park. I immediately began to think of my father and was thinking/saying, “I have to find my Daddy”. We ended up inside a busy restaurant. I think we teleported there because one minute I was in the park and the next I was inside a restaurant. The men were still with me, too.

I looked about, noticing there were many, many people eating and conversing inside the restaurant. It was also a very nice restaurant and the people were all wearing business attire. Most were businessmen of various ages. I looked at them closely, thinking once I saw the back of my Dad’s head after hearing one of the men I was with saying, “Look for him”.

After a few minutes I said aloud, “I don’t think my Dad is here. I don’t think he is in astral anymore”. I felt that he had moved higher up and knowing this made me instantly forget about looking for him.

willowGutted Apartments

As soon as I lost interest in finding my Dad I was transported to yet another scene. This was instantaneous and almost imperceptible. There was no loss in vision that I recall. One minute I was in the restaurant, the next I was standing outside on a paved road underneath a huge weeping willow tree. I stood there dazed for a moment, trying to get my bearings. I looked up and saw the trees heavy, green branches hanging over my head. I then noticed that it was raining a light mist and it was coming down all around me. It was very light rain, just a dusting but enough of it to get wet, although I do not recall feeling “wet” but I did feel the tickle of the rain on my skin. I remember saying aloud, “Come on! I thought I was past this!” as I said this, I saw past the rain a sliver of sunlight peak through rain clouds. I instantly forgot the rain and began to focus upon the tree that was hanging over my head.

I reached up into the tree’s branches and attempted to use it to spring up into the air. As I did, It felt like the tree reached out and wrapped itself around me. I was only able to get about six feet up and then it seemed to gently push me back toward the ground. I tried one more time to get airborne and it happened again. I soon gave up, deciding I was meant to walk, not fly.

It was at the point that I began to look around me. I was standing in a street that led to a large group of apartments that circled a round parking area and street. My vision was still bright and the day still almost cloudless. I scanned the apartments and noted their varying states of decay. Some looked like they had been bombed while others just looked neglected or unfinished. They were all white with several stories and every one of them had no glass in their windows. Instead of windows, there were black, gaping holes that screamed emptiness and isolation.

I did not feel concerned about the apartments as I walked toward them, surveying each of them. I headed toward the last row as I thought I detected a ray of sunlight shining through one of the windows in the very back of one of the apartments. I thought perhaps I could get through to the other side of the apartment, so I went inside.

When I walked in, I noticed the walls were barren, cold and grayish white. I yelled something like, “Hello! I am here!” but got no answer, just an echo of my own voice. There was no furniture and the windows did show there was an other side to the building. I walked toward it but as I did, the walls seemed to shift. I went through a window and it turned into a staircase that went down, or did it go up? I went up the staircase and into another room and again hit another staircase as I tried to go through a window. This one appeared to also go down.

I followed the stairs into a round room that was made of the same grayish walls. There were tiny windows cut out in it, but there was more wall on the other side with only teeny, tiny slits that opened to daylight on the other side. The walls appeared to be made of cement and were very hard and I noted tiny, round moldings decorated the walls. I tried to find the way through but I kept going in circles and could not get out. I then wondered how I got there as I was confused – did I go up or down? It was very disorienting and the room almost seemed to spin around me as I kept trying to get out.

Bullet Holes

I came into my body briefly then and recognized it. I was cold and shifted my position and then went back to sleep.

I did not come back with full lucidity but I was lucid enough to remember that I was talking with someone. There were two – a man and a woman. I recounted my experience to the man, telling him excitedly, “I saw my body!”. Most of this I remember as if re-dreaming everything. I felt like he was there to take notes on my experience.

Within this semi-lucid state while I was recounting my experience, I found myself in a completely different scene. Laid out in front of me was a multicolored board. It was like a canvas but I cannot tell what was painted on it, just that it had lots of vivid reds, blues, and other colors on it. I was carefully filling tiny holes that dotted the canvas with a yellowish putty. I dipped the putty from a container that was held by a woman. She had blonde hair and was very bright. As I dipped into the putty she said, “I can only help you if you are clear”. I immediately understood that she could only help me heal if I was focused upon what I wanted to heal. I looked down at the canvas and the tiny holes all over it. I recognized the holes as bullet holes; wounds.

This vision and message woke me up. I was very cold and a bit shaken by what I had just seen. Was I really so wounded?

It Has Been So Long

I noticed the time and then rolled over to try and sleep. But I couldn’t. I was wide awake. I kept thinking, “I am healing”. My guide was close and he covered me in his calming energy. It swept over me, entering my left arm and then spreading over my entire body. I let it pull me into relaxation, reveling in it.

I must have dozed a bit, as I was awakened by my guide saying to me, “Encourage you to explore yourself. Encourage you to share your experiences with everyone you can.” This brought me to full wakefulness as I digested what I had just been told. I questioned my guide, “Share my experiences???” My guide sent another waves of energy throughout my body. It was more intense this time and I thought for sure something big was happening. I allowed myself to be overcome with the energy and felt it rising in my midsection. Then, it then began to slowly withdraw the last of it lingering in my head until it was gone.

I asked my guide, “Why do you do that? I love it when you do that. It has been so long. Why did you stop?” All these questions came at once along with a feeling of hope that I cannot describe and a welling up of emotion that said, “It has been so long”. It was like I was meeting up with someone I had left behind and only when I saw them again did I realize just how much I missed them. It was the feeling of Home that I have been chasing after my entire life.

I could feel my heart filling up but it fell short of the amazing outpouring of love that I have felt in the past. I was left feeling incomplete but at peace.

Factors Influencing Projection

Lucidity scale: 7

Intent stated?: Yes

Time to bed: 10pm

Time to wake: 7:30am

Meditation?: None

Physical Exercise?: None

Mood: normal to low

Body: neck ache, lower back ache

Tiredness: Moderate

Number of wakings: 2

Technique?: No

Sleeping position: left

Supplements: Natural Calm, Sleepy Time Extra Tea, Benadryl 25mg, Calcium 500mg, Vitamin D 1000mg, Vitex 150mg, DonQuai 150mg

 

 

by

Roberto and Tina

I awoke in the morning feeling very cold. I turned over to lay on my back and had a strong thought: “Get the blanket”. With the thought came a visual of the baby blanket laying in the crib nearby. In the vision I got the blanket and put it over myself for more warmth. It was so cold I thought back, “It’s too cold” and snuggled up under the covers. The thought kept coming, “Get it”. After a few times, I finally gave in to it and retrieved the blanket and put it over me. I fell back to sleep very quickly after that.

Lucid Dream

I soon found myself in my mother’s house, a familiar astral environment of mine. I was not fully aware, but I was somewhat lucid in that I recognized I should not be there and something was not quite right. My mind was a buzz with thought; conversations with myself dominating. I was upset about the book I just finished reading: Doing Time on Earth by Catherine Berger. Specifically, I was upset about the parts of the book where she remembers being on the Other Side. What bothered me most was that she felt no emotional connection to her sister when they met in the afterlife. She had loved her very much in life but was practically repelled by her sister in the afterlife and tried to avoid her. I also was upset by the fact that she allowed her Higher Self to do all the next life planning. She almost seemed completely naive and happily ignorant of anything more than her self-created illusion of Heaven. These two aspects of Berger’s description of the Other Side had gone with me into my sleep and I was certain that I was likely just as naive and ignorant as Berger was between lives. I compared myself and what I have remembered of my past lives to her accounts and found myself horribly lacking. It upset me because I had begun to think myself more advanced than most people. I know this is an Ego issue more than anything but at the time of the dream I was not considering that Ego was even a part of how I was feeling. It just seemed pointless to struggle through life after life, slowly and painfully making “progress”. It was unfair!

As I was thinking of these things, I was acting out a dream with other players. They were familiar to me but not people I know in this life. I spent a lot of time in the living room and the bedroom. In the living area I spoke with a man who was very attractive and I felt drawn to him. I thought of him as my step-brother. He was discussing a “plan” and I wanted to be a part of it. In the dream it was about bodybuilding but the objects I was seeing looked more like 3D computer code, cut out in various colors and set upon a board. I recall feeling a bit split during the dream. There was the me that was dreaming and the me that was talking to herself, mulling over her considerations about life after death.

At one point, I entered the bathroom to put in my contact lenses. I had a plan: I was going to get the attention of the man but I needed to get ready and put in my contacts. The bathroom was a mess. It looked like someone had emptied out all the lower cabinets. One side was full of makeup and I remember thinking it was my younger sister’s stuff. I looked through it curiously and then lost interest. The other side was full of toys – action figures and magnetic toys that a young boy would play with. I looked for my contact lens case within the mess of toys and found it. I opened one side and smoothly extracted the lens and popped it into my eye. I could see clearer in that eye and, satisfied, went to put in the other lens. When I opened that side of the case, the left side, I found a large, tan, gauze bandage. It was perfectly square. I brought it up to my eye before I noticed what it was and stopped and looked at it. “I can’t put this in my eye! Someone has taken my contact lens!”, I thought to myself. I immediately thought it must have been my younger brother.

The dream seemed to become hazy and shifty at this point and I found myself going across the road to my neighbor’s house. I was uncertain why I was there at first. I saw a African America woman walking in her garage. The garage door was open and she was inspecting a large, black piece of machinery. I approached her saying to her, “You’re my neighbor!” I looked closely at her, noting her short stature, short, relaxed, black hair and smooth skin. I knew she was about 50ish and I remembered seeing her and her husband in their garage often. I had waved at her just a couple of days ago. She looked at me and smiled. “Yes! Hello!” then thought for a moment and said, “Are you interested in buying our treadmill? We are about the same age and I think you would like it”. I looked at it and noted it was a Nordic Track. It was in good condition. I also thought it odd that she thought we were the same age.

The lady went over to another black metal piece and said, “This is part of it. It makes it incline”. I told her, “Yes. It is a good treadmill. I have heard good things about Nordic Track”. She showed me how the incline worked saying, “If you want it, you should get it now. Some people are coming to look at it soon.” I said, “I would buy it if I didn’t already have one. Mine is a ProForm and over 10 years old but works really good”. I then looked down at the floor of the garage and saw that it was covered in wood, laminate flooring. I remarked about this, thinking it odd and out of place, but the lady did not respond.

This conversation was very real to me and I felt very much like I had somehow walked over to this woman’s house but could not remember how I got there. It was also daytime and the weather was nice with a bright, almost cloudless sky. The scene seemed off to me and something about it told me I was dreaming. What was weird is that the conversation I had with this neighbor was all very easy to recall and the information, at least mine, was accurate. Also, my neighbor really did look like this lady and I now wonder if she is really selling a treadmill.

It was at this point that I began to gain lucidity. It was gradual but as I left my neighbor’s house I went back towards my own house and then popped quickly into a house I was not familiar with. I decided to fly and immediately found myself flying and very much enjoying the feeling. The house I was in was large and Spanish looking. I saw a woman and two girls in the kitchen. They were very obviously of Spanish origin. I remember thinking, “Why is everyone Hispanic?” I flew through the living area which had a very golden light to it. It had ornate wooden trim and very nice furnishings. Whoever lived here was well off.

I flew under the arches of the kitchen and the two girls saw me. They appeared to be twins, both wearing white smocks. The mother had her back to me.

I left them in the kitchen, fully knowing I was dreaming and happily exploring the area. I had an inkling I was not myself so looked for a mirror. I wanted to see who I was.

I located an ornate mirror with gold embellishments. I went up to it and instantly saw myself. I was much shorter than I thought myself to be and as I looked at my face, it shifted and turned a more tan color than is my original coloring. My hair was golden and cut short like it is in waking life but it also shifted and turned a darker shade, though remained golden. I tried to focus on the face but it kept shifting. I then smiled and said, “I am Tina!”

I turned, suddenly filled with elation at knowing who I was and where I was. I had transported to another life and I was happy to explore and reunite with my family.

I flew outside to a courtyard and saw many people milling about. It was a bright and sunny day and the scene reminded me of something out of a Spanish or Mexican painting with all kinds of oranges and browns mixed with bright reds and yellows. The Mexican feel was strong and as I saw it I grew ever more pleased. I flew high up in the air and looked down. I swear I yelled down at the people but I don’t know what I said. They looked up at me, smiling. There were at least 10 or 12 or them, maybe more. All dressed in Mexican clothing that was woven with bright colors.

I asked the crowd, “Where’s my brother?” A woman pointed toward a corner section. I wanted to see him and so headed that direction. When I got to him, he appeared to be in bed, covered with blankets and sleeping. I don’t know why I didn’t see that a bed in the middle of a courtyard was out of place. I didn’t seem to care. I was more interested in finding this man. He peeked his face out of the blankets and when I saw him I was filled with glee. I went towards him and my vision blacked out.

OBE: Roberto and Tina

I felt the familiar energy of being OOB and knew I was near my physical body. I set the intention to return and did almost immediately.

I found myself back inside the Spanish style house. I flew into the kitchen and accidentally bumped into a mother and child who were drying dishes. They exclaimed when I did and I quickly apologized. I remember being surprised that they responded to me and could see me.

I went into a bedroom and there were two girls watching TV covered up in white bedding. These were the same two girls I saw previously wearing white smocks. I knew they were my sisters. I asked, “Where is Roberto?” They pointed to another bed in the corner.

I went up to the bed and saw a man was laying in it. I knew this was my brother and I knew we were in love. I was happy and knew I wanted to be with him. I said, “Roberto!” and he popped his head out of the covers and smiled at me.

Roberto was light skinned with very black hair. It was shoulder length and thick. He smiled when he saw me and I took his hand. He floated out of the bed and I let him grab onto me from behind, piggy back style. I was aware that his thighs were uncovered and very smooth and feminine looking. My intent was to make love to him. I hadn’t seen him in a long time! There was a part of me thinking, “He’s my brother. That is wrong” but another part was thinking, “It doesn’t matter!”

Roberto was happy to see me and I knew we had a history together. I remember thinking to myself, “I need to remember this. I need to remember his name and my name”. So I thought about the names, spelling them in my head multiple times. I also knew I was saying my name wrong. I was saying “Tina” like in America but it was suppose to have a “ny” sound. I said it to myself that way and laughed. It was nice to be reunited with him!

In the kitchen I put him down and turned toward him. He was unclothed and appeared very feminine looking, but I did not care. I fell into him and we began to make love on the table. What is odd is that while this was happening, I felt myself on the other side of the room, talking to him and watching as we made love. I then saw that I was cuddling a small, hairless kitten or cat and talking with Roberto, not making love to him. Yet I could feel my root chakra very activated. It was like I was in two places and really weird. It all felt very scandalous but something in me knew it didn’t matter what we did – it was all an illusion anyway.

I came back to my body then and felt very relaxed and calm. Yet I was also very unhappy, still thinking about the book and the author’s experience of the Other Side. Again I began to consider how very pointless all the relationships I had in this life would appear once I died. It bothered me that I could end up not feeling the same for them once I left this body. I concluded that I had returned to a past life situation and played out something that normally would have been “wrong” and “taboo”. I did so without guilt because I knew the taboo was an illusion and the wrongness of it was relative.

Factors Influencing Projection

I decided I am going to start recording certain information along with my OBEs and lucid dreams so that I can determine if there are any factors that may be affecting my projections.

Time of going to bed: 10pm
Time of waking up: 6:30am

Meditation: none.
Physical Exercise: none.
Mood: disinterested, depressed
Body: normal, no pain
Level of tiredness: moderate
Number of night wakings: 2

Projection techniques used: none

Sleeping position(s): on side, on back (projected when laying on my back)

Food and drink (not norml): ate out for lunch – Fish Tacos.
Dietary supplements taken (if any): Natural Calm, Sleepy Time Extra Tea, Benadryl 25mg, Calcium 500mg, Vitamin D 1000mg, Vitex 150mg, DonQuai 150mg

Lucidity on a scale of 1-10 (1 being lowest level and 10 being hyper lucid awareness (more real than real)): 7