Daily Archives: January 14, 2016

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Horse Symbolism

It has been a beautiful day today and I have been outside most all of it. Today I went to visit my mom as is my normal weekly routine. I do it because I love her but also because I feel I should – as if my time with her is limited and so I should make the most of it while I can.

While at my mom’s house I sat in the sun, absorbing it’s warmth as much as I could and watching the clouds fly past. It seemed like they were in a hurry to get somewhere. Their exuberance was appealing to me. I wish I was up there with them.

Here are some shots of the clouds today. I wish I had taken video now so you could see just how fast they were moving through the sky.

After tending to (and playing with) the chickens we caught the attention of the neighbors horses. My children and I spent most of the rest of our time there with the two horses, feeding them and petting them. They were so gentle, their muzzles so soft as they tried to find food in our empty hands or eat our hair. lol

I was especially drawn to the horses today for some reason. I see them every visit but don’t care much to communicate with or pet them. But today I wanted to get up close and hug one. The closest I got was to pet their faces and smell their horse smell. That was enough considering I really am afraid of them. Baby steps. 🙂

When we got home I was still thinking about the horses. I was reminded that I have had many, many encounters with horses in dreams and OBEs. A horse has even talked to me while OOB! lol It has been suggested by many others that horse is likely one of my totems and I tend to agree. I was obsessed with them as a child and use to draw pictures of wild mustangs constantly. Every picture I drew had either a horse or a unicorn in it. 🙂 Strangely, when in the presence of a horse I am often nervous and afraid of how big and powerful they are.

I know that horses symbolize freedom, especially the wild ones. Tame horses, on the other hand, tend to represent aspects of one’s personality that they keep confined.

Rather than write it all out, you can read about the horse here.

From what I can tell, it appears that I am being drawn to the horse at this time in my life to help me with some of the current challenges I am facing. I have been really struggling with the transformation or whatever it is that I am going through. I have never in my life experienced such a split within myself and it is painfully present at all times during the day. The only reprieve I get is while I sleep but it comes back as soon as I wake. I am learning to be in my heart space despite feeling this split and it is getting easier – er well maybe I am just getting use to it. There is guidance but it is limited because whatever is happening to me is something my Team cannot interfere with. From what I can tell, there is a mountain sized issue standing in my path and I don’t think I will be able to go around it this time. Makes me want to spew out every cuss word that exists.

Thinking I should have just gone over the fence and given that horse a hug now. Maybe it would have made me feel better? Or maybe it would have kicked the crap out of me. LOL

 

 

 

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Dream: Graduation Commencement

So yesterday, after a clear message that I needed to rest and recuperate from a very intense month of upgrades, energy acceleration and heart opening, I took time to relax and unwind in my own way. It was a beautiful, warm, sunny day and I took advantage of it by being outside as much as I could. It helped immensely and I felt almost normal by the end of the day.

I recognized a definite shift in my energy at one point and before I had a chance to celebrate the return to “normalcy” my third-eye began to intensely buzz and energy quickly covered the entire crown of my head. With this came a very clear message, “Lightening bolt”. There was no missing the message. The feeling behind it was that there was more to come and it would be like a lightening bolt to me and my life.

I wondered aloud to my Team, “Hadn’t I just had a lightening bolt occur? If not, then what is this ‘lightening bolt’?” Worry quickly took over and just as suddenly I didn’t care. I told my Team, “Whatever happens, happens. I am so over all of this and I am sure I can handle whatever it is that life throws at me.”

I retreated to bed not long after succumbing to a physical and mental exhaustion that I had not noticed until that evening. It literally felt like the four weeks of intense change had left me an empty shell. Everything hurt down to an aching in my bones.

Dream: Graduation Commencement

I was discussing with my group (family) my upcoming graduation which I had somehow forgotten about. I was told I would be late if I didn’t hurry up. I was not happy about graduating. In fact, I felt totally disinterested and not at all excited. My group reminded me that I would be singing and giving a speech of some sort because of my class ranking. This made me nervous and I struggled to remember the words of the song. I remember saying, “But I have not even heard the song yet! How am I suppose to sing it if I haven’t rehearsed?” They reassured me that I already knew the song. I didn’t believe them.

As we approached the event hall I was overwhelmed by the sheer number of people in attendance. I said, “We are almost 2 hours early. Why are there already so many people here?” There were so many cars and people that I could not see past them! I remember the time was 6:40pm and the graduation did not start until 8.

Inside the event hall it was packed wall-to-wall with people. I wondered, “Why are there so many people here for such a small graduating class?” In my mind I confused the dream graduation with my own high school graduation of which there were only 35 graduates. The answer I received to my question was that the people attending were family of family of family ad infinitum.

Here the dream split off into many mini-dreams of which I won’t go into specific detail. There was a moment where I was married to a 70 year old man and in another I was discussing a pregnancy with a woman who resembled me and was very, very pregnant.

Interpretation

Graduation is always symbolic of transition and movement to a higher level. Forgetting about graduation indicates not being mentally prepared for the next level and subconsciously resisting. To me, singing represents a celebration within myself of my accomplishment and a rising of vibration. Singing always brings me joy. I seem to fear that I will not know the song so perhaps I am afraid of feeling joy?

The marriage to a 70 year old could indicate an upcoming death while the pregnancy indicates an upcoming birth. More transformation. Lightening bolt.

Messages

When I woke this morning I felt very calm and did not want to wake up. Sleep felt so good. Wonderful in fact. I felt like I had been asleep for a 100 years and I did not want the feeling to go away. Yet I was reminded upon waking that I had been recuperating and that my rest was nearly finished. What? I had hoped for a longer reprieve!

Before I could react fully and while still in-between I noticed I was not alone. My Companion was on my left and with him was another member of our Team. To my right, though, stood three brilliant white lights. They looked to me like white flames of energy. There was no body shape as I am use to seeing when I see energy beings. They looked like white fire. When I saw them I overflowed with hope and a longing to be with them. I mistakenly thought I they had come to take me Home and I was so ready to go with them. My Companion rudely interrupted and said very firmly, “No”. You can imagine my disappointment.

He told me, “They are here to help you”. I was upset, rightfully so. The urge to go with them was very strong and yet here I was being told I couldn’t go with them, or at least I couldn’t stay with them. They were likely the reason why when I woke up I felt so good. I felt rejuvenated and whole again. My heart didn’t hurt, my body didn’t hurt, I felt like I did before all the craziness of December hit me.

With the realization that I could not go Home yet, all the memory of my recent experiences came flooding back and hit me like a ton of bricks. Thankfully it was muted but it was enough that I began to feel again like I would die from the force of it. I asked, begged, to not have a repeat of it all.

I was then reminded of the past life I recently recalled. I feel like it may be time to go through it in more detail.