While at the gym today I experienced a sudden drop in blood sugar. It took me totally by surprise. My heart was pounding in my chest so fast that I immediately entered into panic attack mode. I don’t think my heart has ever pounded that fast. It was like I had just done a sprint! On top of the pounding heart, I had this strange sensation in my head and the tips of my fingers and toes began to tingle. I thought for sure I was going to pass out right there, yet I never did. I was able to keep my thoughts under control, practiced deep breathing and just waited.

And waited. 10 minutes and still my heart was pounding out of my chest and there was an odd tingling and my head felt like there were fingers stretched over the top of it. I had been sitting and was terrified to stand for fear of passing out, but after 10 minutes I figured I needed to get up. So I did and I didn’t pass out. Instead I felt better. My heart was still pounding, though.

I stopped by the front desk and told someone what I was experiencing. The poor guy almost had a panic attack! lol But talking to him helped and he finally calmed down, too. In that time I entered into the most tremendous shakes I have ever experienced. My entire body was shaking! I bought an energy bar and went to my car and waited to feel better. The shaking never stopped and I began to get this bone chilling cold feeling along with an icky tummy. I began to get worried about driving and thought to call my husband to come get me. Unfortunately, I had accidentally taken the other car keys with me and he had left a message asking me about it. He couldn’t come get me if he had no keys! LOL

So I drove home, heart still pounding (though not as bad), entire body shaking, teeth chattering, feeling cold chills, dizziness and stomach feeling icky. It was like I had instant flu. When I got home I was starving so drank some orange juice and another energy bar. But I was still so cold! So I took a long hot bath. I felt a bit better after but my stomach is not happy still.

So no big deal, right? Um, usually I would say that but this episode was different. I’ve never had my blood sugar drop that fast and unexpectedly and then leave me feeling like I just had the flu. The entire time it was happening alarms were going off. This was not good.

Why it’s Scary

A few days ago I had conversation with one of my guides while in the in-between. It was a very lucid conversation but I only recall the last parts. We were talking about diabetes and renal failure. I disregarded the conversation because it made no sense at the time.

The next morning, Mary Tyler Moore died as a result of complications from diabetes. I thought, “That must have been what the conversation was about.” But they didn’t say her kidneys failed? I disregarded that. I have lots of in-between conversations that make no sense. I don’t over analyze them anymore.

So today, while in the midst of the panic attack-like heart pounding and low blood sugar symptoms the above information came back to me, specifically the diabetes part. I tried to disregard. The last thing I needed was to think too much and cause the panic to escalate. Yet the information kept coming, along with memories and connections.

When I first awakened back in 2003, one of the first questions I asked was, “How will I die?” I received back, “Kidney failure.” I wondered about it and then let it go. Whatever. That will be when I’m old….lol

Then there came the family connection. My maternal grandfather’s side of the family all had diabetes. My great aunt had it so bad she had a foot amputated. My grandfather got it in his 60’s. My mom has hypoglycemia so bad now that she is terrified of a “low blood sugar attack” and takes food with her everywhere. Also, there is a connection between Mary Tyler Moore and my mom, too. She long considered her as her “twin” not only in name but also in looks.

On top of it all I have not been nice to my body. In my twenties I was bulimic. Probably for a good seven years and sometimes really bad. I never used laxatives (thankfully) but I binged and purged sometimes seven or eight times a day at my worst. On top of that I exercised every day and obsessed over calories. I ended up with awful tooth issues and experienced my first episodes of hypoglycemia toward the end. My spiritual awakening put an end to all that. But was it too late?

Finally, during my first pregnancy I got preeclampsia pretty bad. My doctor was concerned and told me, “You’re kidneys are shutting down.” She showed me the tests. I had protein level of 9. This was ultimately the information that led us to decide to induce labor. I remember my husband’s face – totally white. On top of that my blood pressure was way too high. I am surprised I didn’t have a stroke considering how high it was: 165/105. Only after, when I was recovering did I realize just how sick I was.

Bulimia wreaks havoc on the kidneys. My family history is full of diabetes. Kidney issues are made worse by low blood sugar. Eek!

Maybe I am going overboard and none of this is really connected, but the way the information came to me all at once, like pieces of a puzzle, has me a bit unnerved. I receive personal information from my guidance, mySelf, all the time. It is accurate more than I want it to be. I don’t doubt that this is meant to get me to pay more attention to my body. Whether I can do anything about it now, I don’t know. I think the damage has been done, though, and I am not crying about it. There are worse deaths that I can imagine (like being drowned by your father – my last life).  Maybe I will just go into a diabetic coma and die in my sleep? 🙂

As you can tell I’m not freaking out. I do take this information seriously and will pay more attention to my body. I suspect I have a good 20+ years left of life, so I’m not stressing just yet. But that is only if I don’t consider that one time my guidance asked me, “What if you only had 10 years left to live?” That was in 2008……:)