It’s been a while since I’ve written so I thought I would post a quick update and recent dream.

For over over 2 weeks I’ve been experiencing mild insomnia in the form of not being able to fall asleep until well after midnight. Some nights I sleep okay, others not well at all and then there are times I sleep very deeply. Thankfully I am able to sleep past 8am most mornings thanks to it being summer and my work schedule, which helps. The insomnia is not upsetting, really. I suspect my body is just not tired and the energy this month is a likely contributor as well.

Along with my sleep issues I’ve shifted back into a very balanced and calm state where my mind is more quiet and my mood is stable. I still have upsets here and there, of course, but I don’t tend to dwell on the negative. All in all, I seem to have slipped into a state of acceptance and appreciation for what I have. This I did without really putting forth any effort other than making the decision to stop resisting and surrender.

Work is going well. I am still able to work from home half the week, which is the best part of it by far, and tomorrow is my 1 year work anniversary. Can you believe it? Back in 2016 with all the ascension shifts I was experiencing I purposefully left work and stayed home because of the overwhelm of being around people. It was what was best for me at the time but it felt like I would never be able to confront going back to work. It was just too overwhelming with my sensitivities to energy being as they were. Yet here I am, 1 whole year of working full-time, and handling the transition back into society (lol) like a champ.

It wasn’t/isn’t without struggle, though. I occasionally experience physical pain and ick/sick from others’ energy. I call it “energy sick” for lack of a better description. Normally it happens when someone is talking to me. The only way to describe it is painful, like an energetic dissonance felt within my energy body that can make me feel faint and sick to my stomach. I also have anxiety/panic attacks, though those have decreased tremendously. I have limited my caffeine intake to one cup of half-caffeine coffee a day and cut out alcohol and other crutches that seemed to increase my sensitivity. I have added a more consistent yoga practice, to include Kundalini yoga (when needed), and have been setting personal fitness goals and sticking to them.

Dreams

My dreams lately are pointing at some inner healing work being done. I’ve been seeing a guide that resembles a guide I met a long time ago in an OBE who I believe I called “Chris”. He has dark hair that is around shoulder length, a very prominent nose, and muscular build. His purpose seems to be to counsel me on my avoidance of the Kundalini energy, specifically the intense sexual desire and arousal that can sometimes accompany it. Last night I spoke with him quite a bit in dreamtime about just this topic.

Dream: Hippies

The dream began at a very large estate. I was inside a mansion with my mother who asked me to mow the yard, specifically saying, “It’s time you helped out around here.” I went outside and noticed construction of various pools and concrete paths. I saw how extensive the grounds were and how much mowing it would mean and thought, “How am I suppose to mow all this?” So rather than mowing I followed the pathways as if on an ATV only I was flying close to the ground.

The flying felt amazing and I was yelling in delight as if on a roller coaster. I was also talking to someone as I traveled, commenting on what I was seeing as we approached a sidewalk intersection (lol) that resembled a miniature highway intersection. I slowed as I got to a section where water was flowing across the sidewalk and construction crew in hard hats was busy putting in more sidewalk. I remember asking my friend, “Which way now?” I saw the water flowing under an overpass to my right as I asked, “Straight or right?” At the time I was splashing in the water a bit and wanted to follow the stream as if on a water ride.

We ended up going straight but I do not recall the traveling. Instead I was taken by my friend to an RV. Inside was a group of people who reminded me of hippies from the 60’s a little. My friend was visible – the guide I mentioned above – and he introduced me to the group and asked me if I wanted to stay and smoke a drug of some sort with them. I was hesitant and said, “Oh no. Anything that is smoked in a pipe is going to be too much.” He asked me, “What do you mean?” I replied that the drug would likely bring out parts of me that were not very nice, specifically giving the example of someone who took pleasure in hurting others and causing harm/pain. I gave an example of hurting animals and said, “I don’t like that part of me.” In the dream there was memory of hurting an animal but I cannot recall the specifics of it now, only that it felt good to this part of me and that sickened me.

The drug was brought out and I was participating. I was persuaded to give it a try but I was hesitant. I don’t remember actually smoking the drug. Instead I recall being closer with the group and playing a game of some kind. The game felt conflicted – like good and bad at the same time. What I recall most vividly was that I was being touched as if by many hands. I remember saying to someone, “Don’t do that.” The sense was that if I participated in this “game” that I was being “bad”.

I woke before the feelings manifested completely and my guide was close asking me questions to get me to think about why I reacted the way I did. There was a residual sense of feeling a very strong magnetic attraction but it was faint.

Mini-Dream

The conversation with my guide this morning was short-lived because I was so tired that I shifted into the in-between and lost memory of what was said. I recall having a mini-dream of being in my bed, just waking and groggy, and attempting to put on my contacts while still in bed. There was little light and I dropped the lens. I attempted to find it but couldn’t see well and remember not caring and thinking, “I can just get another one.”

Interpretation

My interpretation of the dream with the gypsies is that I am being asked to participate and do my part. This could be part of my greater mission or just my own path in this lifetime, or both. The sidewalk I travel has to do with my life path but it is a “safe” path, one where I am more confident and sure of my own success. The construction zones are areas where work is being done. The fact that the construction is at an intersection of other paths could indicate a decision is coming where I can go right or straight. My guess is that going right has to do with enjoyment, emotion and intuition since it is related to the flowing water. Straight is continuing on the path I am already on.

The group of hippies in the dream is about a path I would be taking if there were no self-imposed restraints of limitations. It can represent that path I want or desire to take but am not taking for various reasons (fear, uncertainty). The RV has to do with self-confidence and ability to adapt to change. The drug is likely something I see as temptation. Similar to a drug it has consequences, the tendency to bring up in me things I do not wish to confront, specifically dark aspects that I am aware of and do not like. I link this darker side to the positive feelings from the drug.

The mini-dream indicates I recognize that I am choosing not to see. I attempt to see but do not mind when I lose the ability since I can get it back whenever I choose. The groggy feeling indicates unconsciousness or unawareness.

The result of the dreams and conversation with my guide this morning was that I prefer to continue to do this work in my dreams for the time being. However, based upon his insistence I suspect he will not give up anytime soon. It feels like he wants me to face this head on.