Incentives Needed

The lack of motivation continues. In considering it further, I realize that I have been feeling this lack for some time. Months, years even. It is intricately linked to my dislike of being in this world, of participating in life. I struggle to find things that make me smile. Daily I search for them, hoping for a brief reprieve in this drudgery. Thankfully I am surrounded by my children and my youngest is a great source of joy. He is walking, talking, babbling joy.

Right now we all are in an integration stage, preparing for the next step or whatever you want to call. A friend of mine said it perfectly: Integration is being stuck on third base (I don’t know) until CONFIRMATION comes to the plate and drives you Home.

My dreams were indicative of my struggle with finding the motivation to move forward, to take the steps I need to take. When I awoke I heard my guides say, “We will give you incentives.” Hmmm. Intriguing.

Dream: In High School Again

Once again I found myself in the all-too-familiar dreamscape of high school. I was a student in a present-day high school taking all the courses I had already taken and blending in with the students there. I remember at one point getting a math assignment and feeling fed up with such assignments. I already knew how to do this level of math. It was 9th grade math. I was way beyond 9th grade – miles above it.

A fellow student gave me the last bunch of math problems – simple algebraic equations. I took the paper, sighed and rolled my eyes. The student asked me if I could do them. I said, “Of course, I can. I can do all of it. It is just tedious and time consuming.” In my mind I thought of how long it would take to solve each problem and just considering it made me tired.

I continued to talk to the student and others gathered around to listen to me. I remember telling the student my secret: I graduated high school already. Years ago. They asked how long ago and I said, “Well I graduated in 1994, so more than 20 years now.” They all gasped. lol In the dream I looked/felt young like them so I had no issue with being so old, but now I laugh because damn, I’m old now! lol

A young girl and I walked through the school together talking. She was African American with beautiful, shoulder length curls that hung in ringlets around her face. Exactly the way I wish I looked in this lifetime. We were going to a part of the school we were not allowed to go and I was excited to be doing something different. I remember we got to an area where there was a large bed and living area. Sitting at a desk was an dark complected teacher. She allowed us to leave and we exited the scene.

Dream: Water Park Prison

I was working at a water park. It was early in the morning and the water had not been turned on yet. I told some waiting children that the water would be on soon. I told them to watch the massive blue slides for signs of water turning on. When it did, the children were allowed to slide on them and for a moment I was one of those children, joyfully sliding down the slides.

I remember being at the front desk with others and offering to help. For some reason I ended up playing the role of waitress or servant, bringing drinks. It was like the front desk area turned into a restaurant. Interestingly, helping made me feel useful and needed so I found enjoyment in it.

Then I was inside a county jail that reminded me of a school except it was most definitely set up to imprison its occupants. I was there to visit a young Hispanic man. I remember that an older woman was with me and was helping me to get in since I was not suppose to be there visiting him. I remember little about our meeting now, but I do recall meeting with him. He was in the middle of eating his dinner but it was too early for dinner – around 4:30pm – and I apologized for interrupting it. He kept his head down and wouldn’t look at me, but my message to him was that I was there to get him out. He would be released soon.

Interpretation

In considering these dreams, it is obvious to me that I feel imprisoned in this Earth experience. Life is a drudgery. It isn’t a challenge anymore – or at least not a challenge that I find worthwhile. The problems I have I feel I can solve easily but I don’t see the point. If I have already graduated, what am I doing here still? I look at the math problems and feel as if all desire to live is sucked completely out of me. And I do feel I CAN solve them without issue, but the idea of taking the time to do so is exhausting.

The second dream is interesting. I think someone was trying to get me to see the fun that can be found in this “game”. Emotions (water) can be something exhilarating (water slide). One doesn’t have to drown in them. And the waitress part I think was me being shown that I found enjoyment in being of service – which I do.

The prison scene appears to be them showing me that I could help free others from the “prison-school”. Who it was I was visiting, I’m not sure, but I suspect it was someone who I felt I could help.

With that, I will add that I have been feeling a huge loss. The feeling of ALIVEness that came with the heart connection and kundalini episodes of the past 6 months is now gone. I feel it has been unfairly taken from me and without it, I don’t see anything ahead of me but a bleak,  uninteresting life. It seems always to happen this way for me. I am given a gift and then it is snatched away from me or I lose interest in it because it is no longer new. Similar to how a child plays with a new toy for a day or two and then it ends up under their bed, forgotten, and they seek out another new toy to play with. That’s me. Easily bored. Always wanting something new and exciting and without it sulking in the corner until I get what I want.

 

 

Snail

This morning I went outside and sat for a while. I noticed movement below me. I looked down and saw a tiny snail crawling along a blade of grass. I knew it was a message to me: slow down, give yourself time to change and adapt.

The message of the snail is far beyond slowing down. The shell represents the spiral and expansion, thought and evolution. The snail itself represents taking one’s time to reach one’s goals, adapting to changes and growing with change. The spiral in other culture’s symbolizes the moon and the phases of the moon. It is also the snail’s only means of defense. Additionally, it is the snail’s home. It is at home wherever it is.

The message to me seems to be to work with what I have now and to take things slowly and allow everything to unfold in its own time.

Message: The New Grid

With the new moon approaching, I decided to spend some time considering what exactly I want to manifest in my life. So last night, I did this, speaking aloud my intent. Instead of giving specific Earthly manifestations I would like to see, I spoke of quality. For example, “I AM in loving, mutually respectful relationships with others.” This was not the specific one I vocalized but it is similar.

Prior to voicing my intent, I did Hatha yoga and spent some time meditating. I had full crown chakra activation while meditation and the energy snaked down my neck by the end of it.

Again, as has been the norm for this entire week, a major thunderstorm struck after bedtime. This one had house-shaking thunder and room-brightening lightening along with torrential downpours. I have lived in and visited many places but never have I encountered such intense storms as the ones we get here in Texas. Wow.

Dream: Hybrid Children

This dream began with me driving down the road away from my mother’s house. Someone else was driving the car and I was looking out the window. I saw a woman curled up in the fetal position on the side of the road. Her belongings were packed in a suitcase. I told the driver  to turn around. He did not want to. We were on a schedule. I convinced him to anyway.

I got out of the car but the woman was not there. Instead, there was a very long vehicle that looked like a station wagon that had been stretched into a limousine. Inside were more children than I could count. They were playing and all around them was a golden light. I was immediately drawn to them and began talking to them. One girl showed me her toy. It was made for her fingers and she showed me how to use it. I remember commenting that I had never seen anything like it.

I remember the children had a caretaker with them but he stayed back and allowed me to talk with them for a while. I felt such love for them and wanted to stay but knew I was needed elsewhere. So I moved on.

I came upon a strange structure that could have come from a Dr. Seuss book it was so bizarre. It was a long machine that appeared to have row upon row of teeth. You put an object in at one end and out the other end it appeared transformed.  A young man was with me explaining how it worked. I never saw him until after he had been inside the machine. When he came out he had changed. Instead of looking human, he looked very alien. His face had changed dramatically. His eyes became hollow and deep set in his skull and his mouth and nose merged. His lips disappeared and his mouth widened, stretching towards his now nonexistent ears. His nose became two slits.

I remember saying to him, “You are an avian-human hybrid! Look, you are covered from head to toe in tiny, down-like feathers!” I looked him up and down and was shocked at his transformation. His entire body was a light, golden brown color, like the color of the golden eagle. He wore no clothing and his body was very slim. But most noticeable was his face. He looked very odd but to the me in the dream he was quite normal looking, beautiful even.

I put his briefcase into the machine and out the end came what appeared to be something edible. I remember saying to the hybrid man, “You probably won’t like this.” I remember thinking he would want to eat worms now. lol

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Message 

When I awoke I was upset because I knew I was suppose to remember a name and could not recall it. I also could not recall anything about the context in which I had received it. But I did recall the hybrid children and avian hybrid.

I did, however, remember other dream experiences at this time. I had dreamed of being on planes and traveling. Plane after plane after plane. All with the same group of individuals who were “family”. I remember one man clearly. He was from my Mt. Shasta trip. My family had bought me a ticket to travel with them. I remember it was on American Airlines. We were traveling to Chicago. I had already been there, I told them. But had I?

I knew that the dream was symbolic of my travels in my sleep. I had been on craft, traveling and discussing my mission.

Another dream came forward in my memory. In this one I was a new recruit and after arriving for training had gotten distracted and could not find my squadron. I was distracted by this body (physical reality). I did find three others who were as lost as I was. I remember seeing an indoor water park with one of those wave pools and recognizing I had been overwhelmed by the huge waves (emotions). Me and the other recruits sought out help and a short, black woman came up to us. I remember standing in front of this woman and her looking at me very closely. She asked me, “What’s wrong with you?” I felt that no matter how tall I tried to stand that my eyes shifted to the ground and my shoulders slumped. She said, “Where is your motivation!? We need to do something about that.” I replied, “I know, sir.”

With all these memories there came the voice of one of my guides. When I looked at him, he was very tall. His shoulders would be at my eye-level, that’s how enormous he was. His arms were very thin and sinewy and I remember reaching for his hand and holding it. The fingers were as long as my own hand and very thin also. I hugged him. Then I became aware of massive wings. When I noticed them he said, “We all have them, even you.”

I did not question this. I understood I was being shown one of many thousands of forms We take. There were more important things to discuss. My mission especially. I acknowledged my lack of motivation. He asked me, “What can we do for you?” I honestly had no answer. Where did this lack of motivation come from? I knew it was because everything that is my life does not match my heart. The intents that I had stated prior to sleep are not my reality and I need to take action to make it so. Knowing this made me completely apathetic.

I was then asked to come with them. They wanted to show me something. Soon I was seeing a map of the U.S. below me. It was an outline map. My attention was directed immediately to west Texas and I saw a small stream of yellow that grew massive the farther west we moved. The yellow was like a stream in Texas but by the time it got to New Mexico almost the entire state was covered in yellow. Arizona, especially the central to southern half, was completely covered and so was the entirety of southern California.

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I grew too conscious of what I as being shown at this point and withdrew. What was this? What was this yellow color? There was memory of the human physical aura and I understood that this was equivalent to the physical aura of the U.S. What composed it? The collective thoughts of the people inhabiting these regions. Yellow in the physical aura indicates a virus. Yellow in the mental aura indicates over thinking/analytical thought. Do the people in this southwestern U.S. have a collective mental virus?

My attention was brought to other areas of the U.S. The Midwest and central regions were dotted with red and yellow. Red is inflammation and anger, it can also be sexual energy. My thought here was that many in these areas were locked up in root chakra issues. Then I was taken to the region just over the Great Lakes and a bit above into Canada. Blue and aqua. Quite beautiful. Then I was taken down toward the southern U.S. and saw once again red streaks. There were several giant bubbles of red over Kentucky, Tennessee and Alabama along with more yellow streaks.

Memory then returned of my lessons about the energy grid and how it had been disassembled. My gridwork was complete but another type of gridwork had begun. Work with the collective consciousness. Connections needed to be established. It is like a world-wide-web of consciousness. This is the new grid. It is IN US, in OUR thoughts.

But there is still the question of my lack of motivation. It is horribly apparent. I can’t help but think that this Mars retrograde is to blame. But then the lack of motivation is suppose to be affecting the men, not the women. Why am I so affected?

Featured image taken from http://www.viralnova.com/hybrid-children/

 

 

 

Sharing

It’s time to share yourself with others. However you can: share. It can be a smile. A touch. A silent prayer. A hug. A positive thought. Whatever you have, give it. It is time.

Our missions are being revealed. Notes have been taken over countless years of preparation and training. Our practicums are ahead. Time to put into practice what we’ve learned. Time to step up.

Guidance will be provided. You will not be alone in this. However, you may find physical connections will abound. Your not-aloneness will be felt in physicality. We will gather. In pairs. In small groups. In social media. The “web” will grow. It will be slow at first. We have lots to do in preparation of this. Some of us still have some learning to do. We’ve put the hardest lessons aside for too long. They are coming up because, well, they are all that’s left.

An Example of Sharing

Last night I was alone with my three kids. My husband is out of town until Friday night so its just us four. I spent the night playing games with them. I have not laughed so much in a while. My guidance told me, “You were in the present moment. You glowed.” I do not doubt it.

After the games, I did some stretching/yoga with my daughter, instructing her on the proper positioning. Then I taught her how to Om. We sat face-to-face, cross legged, and Om’ed together. Her tone was higher than mine and she kept laughing.

I asked her to give me her hands and we Om’ed together like that. Holding her hands made my tone lower. Releasing her hands made it come out higher. Interesting!

Then I showed her the energy. I asked her to put her hands toward me, palms facing up. Then I put my hands over hers and asked her to feel. Within minutes there was a crackling energy between our hands and she was fascinated. She asked, “How do you do that? It is so warm!”

I moved my hands and she noted the changes. I put my hands on either side of her head and her eyes got really wide.

Then I noticed my right palm was pulling almost painfully, so I got out one of my crystals. My daughter was full of questions. I answered them. I let her hold the crystal. I taught her about positive and negative charge. I taught her about the atom. I taught her about us and how we channel energy/charge. She listened attentively.

This is how I shared myself – my energy, my knowledge – last night. It is simple yet powerful. Anyone can do it. We just have to remember to do it.

 

In the Funk No More

Yesterday Mars was the closest to Earth it has been in 11 years! Did you feel it?

For me, the sensation and energy was much like a mild hibernation period. I was not exhausted or mindless, just calm and rolling with the energy. I went to the gym and observed people while I worked out. The energy of most was directed inward. Focus on the Self. Conserve emotional and mental resources. Nourish the physical body. Where usually I get direct stares by both men and woman, there were very few others looking outward and being open to others.

The morning here in Texas was rainy. There was thunder and lightening. It was like the floodgates of Heaven were unleashed. Then, just as suddenly, the rain stopped, the clouds parted and it was blue, cloudless skies. To me this was a message that “All storms eventually pass and clarity soon follows.”

My husband was a continual energy circuit. He was in an organizing and cleaning out mood. I came home from the gym and an entire closet had been cleaned out and our stairway wall was covered in his many oil paintings (and some of my paintings, too). He said, “I should not keep my art hidden away in a closet. I should be proud of it and show it to the world.” lol The wall does look superb.

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So while some of us were being hit hard and retreating because of the intensity of Mars’ retrograde energy so close to Earth, other’s of us were feeling more in our power, at least my husband was. What I found was that by the end of the day this energy helped the communication between my husband and I. We were more in sync than we have been in a long while. Though we didn’t agree on everything, it didn’t matter as he seemed to embrace our differences. He was more appreciative and accepting of my point of view. His receptivity to my offered advice was refreshing. Rather than reject that he was unable to feel comfortable with one choice or another, he accepted his indecision and the fact that it may not be time yet to make a decision or move. Pieces of the puzzle are still needed.

I have found that Mars retrograde has turned my normally decisive husband into a mess of indecision. He has also been extremely lethargic at times, which is very much unlike him. I do not have an issue with stepping into my power and taking control. lol However, some women will find this very, very uncomfortable. If you have men in your life who are unable to do something that needs to be done it is time for you to step up.

So the funk of yesterday is behind me and today I feel refreshed and ready for whatever June has to offer. Hopefully you are feeling it, too – a more optimistic outlook, an openness to change and a surge of creativity from within.

Message 87

Today I felt like searching online for jobs which had a spiritual component to them. I just randomly went where Google led me. I found this website. So many of the jobs would be great for me if I were single. Sigh. The adventurous side of me really wanted to go to Costa Rica. lol

While I was browsing a summer job located in Hunt, Texas, I felt something on the back of my neck. Thinking it was a bug or something poking me, I reached back and felt a very small piece of something stuck to me. I pulled it off. It was a tiny sticker.

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Another one of those inspection tags that you find on new clothing. lol Seems to be a common method of message transmission by my guides these days.

Guess what message the number 87 brings?

Angel Number 87 meaning gives a powerful communication from the angel numbers that if you have spiritual inclinations, the time is highly auspicious to get into a spiritual based vocation and spread this knowledge to others. You will have the blessings of the angels in your ambitions and you will be able to put it into reality. They recognize your efforts to spread spiritual awareness in the society and will be happy to support you in this endeavor.

I have been laughing ever since. Message received loud and clear.

Now, please, just direct me where I need to go.

“I Knew Their Hearts” ~Jeff Olsen

This is the most heart warming video message. I was led to this post by my guidance who had recently given me similar messages. It was confirmation and I think I cried through most of the video. I have felt the bubble of peace he experienced. There is nothing like it.

AngelicView's avatarAngelicView

GuardianAngelandBabyAngelicView: This is a video of NDE’r Jeff Olsen speaking at Findhorn’s 2015 “We Do Not Die” Conference. I turned it on last night – late – and stayed glued to it until the end. I ended up closing up my computer at almost 5am last night – I just couldn’t go to bed without hearing what happened next.

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Preparation for June Shift

If you are experiencing what I am – extreme exhaustion, crown and third-eye chakra intensity, mental fog, inability to focus or keep your eyes open – then you are in the midst of a download right alongside me. I am told mine will last two days, but I suspect that everyone’s experience will vary depending on their individual needs.

We are heading headlong into another extreme energy shift that will begin in June and last until the summer solstice. June will be monumental for many. If you have already sensed that this is true for you, then your guidance has been trying to warn you. Well here is another warning. Caution: Treacherous terrain ahead.

I see a tightrope ahead of me. Balance is key. One cannot remain on this tightrope without remaining focused and maintaining balance. On either side is a pit of molten lava. Whew! It makes me a bit nervous seeing such a vision. Hopefully there aren’t too many others facing tightropes over deep, fiery pits. lol But I am reassured that this is just a warning. The circumstances surrounding this Shift will only be to the extent that you can handle, nothing more than that.

femininepowerWomen especially will experience this Shift uniquely. We are coming into our own power and releasing the bonds that have so strictly confined our creative power and energy. We will take a stand in various ways this summer. What exactly you will feel empowered to do  will depend on what is needed for you to progress in your individual transformation.

This is not a forerunner only transformation either. As a forerunner myself, I often forget to directly address those of the other “waves” who have recently been activated. You are now coming into your own power as a group and taking up the reins of your projected paths. Some of you will be taking over where the forerunners left off – becoming gridworkers, gatekeepers, energy manipulators – you name it. But honestly, us forerunners are not all done, so the transfer will not be all at once. It doesn’t really matter, though, just know that you will hear you own “call” soon enough if you haven’t already.

 

 

I’ve Emerged from the Vortex

Whew! Feeling a bit out of it still, too. LOL

In the three days I was in Mt. Shasta I was in a constant vibratory state. I have never felt so alive in my life. WOW!

There is way too much to write and I am still in recovery mode. Actually, I think I am in a state of mild shock. Re-entry into my 3D life will take some effort on my part I think. I feel like I have been on the mother ship for three days.

Here are some photos of my trip to give you an idea of where I have been. 🙂 Enjoy!

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