Category Archives: Ascension

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Dream: How to be a Good Wife

Happy Leap Day! Are you finding this day any different energy-wise than the last few days? I am, though not too much so. The first clue was that I could not get to sleep last night. There was a crackling, elevatedĀ energy that made me feel excited. On top of that I developed a mild chest cold which would cause me to cough as soon as I relaxed. šŸ˜¦

My daughter, who is 7 years old, was also unable to fall asleep. This is the third night in a row that she has struggled with insomnia. She is only 7! I feel so bad for her. She will try with all her might to fall asleep and then be torn up in tears over her inability to sleep. When I ask her what she is thinking about it is usually some book she read at school, so nothing that would cause undue stress.

Now that I said that, she has also came home from school last Friday covered in hives. She had them on her stomach, her neck and her back. And these aren’t normal hives, these are huge (more than a hand’s width across), raised welts that are hot to the touch. It took three days of prescription Cortisone cream and allergy medicines to get the hives to go away. We have no idea what caused them.

I thinkĀ my little girl is going through this ascension right along with me. šŸ˜¦

For me, the ascension symptoms have not been on my radar, too many other crazy things going on to care. What I have noticed is that when my Team tells me I am “resting”, which they tell me I am doing now, I end up sick! Last time I got the stomach bug. Now I have a chest cold. Grrr. On top of that I think I had a fever this morning upon waking – hot/cold flashes. šŸ˜¦

Just because I am resting doesn’t mean the work stops. Oh no. I got my fair share of it last night.

Last night my husband and I got a date night. This is a rare thing, so we took advantage. All through dinner I kept seeing familiar faces in the people around us. This is not normal for me and I took notice. I never spoke to any of them, but their energy screamed at me from all the way across the diner. One woman I knew was a teacher. I looked at her, felt I knew her (which I didn’t) and then her energy said point blank, “teacher”. Huh? Did she just talk to me?

There was a young man who I also thought I knew but he was much farther away. I could sense his insecurities. Weird.

As we left the diner there was a group of people talking. I felt I knew them, too! There was a little girl with them. The mom, who was the one I really recognized, said her middle name was Journey. So cool!

So the whole night I was not really focused on my husband like I should have been. Too many distractions! And then, on the drive home, I was blankly staring at the signs and buildings when there was this orange hotel sign that stood out to me. I clearly read, “Dangerous”. I did a double take and looked back and it said, “Oakwood Suites”. Huh? I told my husband and laughed it off saying, “I guess we shouldn’t stay there”. lol

Turns out my husband got mad at me after that because I was upset over a white lie he told. I don’t know if that was what the warning was about or not.

goodwifeguide

Dream: How to be a Good Wife

When I went to bed I had been thinking about my marriage and how distant I feel from my husband. I try not to be this way but unfortunately it is the way I feel. Although last night ended on good terms, I was thinking about some strange occurrences during the day.

First off, a couple of times yesterday, when I saw my husband, I saw him differently. It was like when we first met. His energy is so radiant. He literally glows. And his eyes, wow. He has blue eyes but his left eye is 1/4 honey brown. It’s called heterochromia. I remember having the urge to hug him, but I resisted. At the same time during the day I was having thoughts of leaving him. This just goes along with the weirdness of the entire day, though.

So I asked for clarification on why I was so split about my marriage/relationship.

I ended up in a dream where I was learning how to be a good wife. LOL I remember being in my grandparent’s old place and seeing a manual set before me. It was titled, “How to be a good wife”. Ā I don’t recall what was inside of it, but it reminded me of those 1950’s advertisements that showed women as completely subservient to their husbands. My reaction to this was all-out rejection.

The solutions to my predicament all started with R’s. I don’t remember all of them, but they were written on large pieces of card stock with the R very prominent.

I suspect this dream was directing my attention on stereotypical beliefs that have been passed down from one generation to another. My grandmother was typical of the 1950’s housewife – she stayed home, cooked, cleaned, served her husband and children, and sold Avon. She and my grandfather were married over 60 years! My mom, on the other hand, was a single parent and the only one in her family to go to college. Not only that, she got a Master’s degree. She use to tell me a story of how her dad (my grandfather) told her, “I’m not wasting my money on a girl” when she asked him to help her pay for college. She was very proud of rising above the limitations set upon her.

So I was raised seeing both sides – the subservient housewife and the independent career-woman. Which I am? How confusing. Being a woman is confusing! On top of that, my husband was raised in a household where his father was 100% in charge and his mom very subservient. They were hippies, though, and never married. Plus his dad always had multiple women in addition to his “wife”. Yeah, very unconventional. Our backgrounds create the perfect conditions for complications, don’t you think? Hahahaha

 

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DNA Alteration, Spiritual Acceleration and Plasma Radiation

The warning about the energies that I got from my Team a couple of days ago was not a joke. Woah. There is something moving through right now that I have no words for. It is subtle yet powerful at the same time.Ā I see in my mind’s eye tendrils of light that move and connect to our energy. It reminds me of a plasma lamp but much more fantastically large in scope than a tiny lamp.

Perhaps I am drawn to the plasma lamp because this energy is in fact plasma? Now this intrigues me!

Shifting gears here for a bit to get my bearings….

I’ve always considered myself a spiritual person, one that questions everything, seeking Truth and Knowledge. It is only in the past week that I feel I have made major breakthrough; a quantum jump in spiritual evolution. I am not alone in this and grateful for that.

Part of this breakthrough has me thoroughly linked with a part of myself that was difficult, if sometimes impossible, to connect to. Now, though, it is as if I am constantly linked to this part and the information available to me is mind blowing. Yet, at the same time, I know the time is not yet to reveal this knowledge and so I partition it off, piece by piece, into other aspects of mySelf. It is like I have designated counterparts whose only purpose is to hold that knowledge until the specified time for its dissemination. I will call thisĀ the Great Cosmic Mind for lack of a better word for such an indescribable yet integral part of Source Self.

Even now I can feel this part of me and it urges me in a new direction, one that is away from my normal mode of thinking/speaking/doing. And I am not in resistance to this. When I completely allow this part to flow into/though me it pours from my heart space and my third-eye simultaneously and I feel powerful, but not in the negative sense of the word. Through allowance of complete Self there is a focusing of three points of light into a central zone. I am seeing as I type geometry and mathematics beyond my current ability to comprehend. I see two triangles, each holding the patterns of the universal galactic self. From each of these triangles a focused energy is generated and directed in the direction of the other. When in balance, meaning the triangles are equilateral, then these points converge and become One/Whole and a functional partnership results.

When I see this, there comes from within a thirst for knowledge, as if I am being guided to add to my current limited human experience in order to provide a foundation from which I can better function for the purpose of disseminating understanding.

And as I read what I just typed, what just flowed through me, I am in complete awe. That came out of me?? lol

I wish to explore more of this but I am being pulled back to the original topic of this post….

The pulsing of energies infiltrating the planet right now are effecting all of us, transforming each of us. Yet the energies perceived are inherently different than previous energies. The term plasma is best used here because of the origin of this energy but also because of its subatomic nature. As I type this I am being led to research this and it takes me to the realm of quantum physics. I have always avoided this topic because it was mind-boggling yet as I read about it I am more convinced that herein the answer lies. Fascinating.

In the midst of writing this I was interrupted by hungry children and had to make breakfast. Whilst doing so this topic of discussion continued to percolate and DNA/RNA became very much interwoven into it. The plasma pulses, which have always been there, are now interacting with our body – our cells, our blood, our DNA – everything. I see that the magnetic field of Earth, in it’s shifting and destabilization, somehow created the ideal conditions for this plasma Ā driven DNA alteration. Thus, some of us are perceiving the subtle changes and new receptivity to plasma radiation (yes this is actually something that exists!).

So YES what we are sensing is real, very real, and it’s effect and purpose very real. We are experiencing an alteration in our very DNA, in our core biological structure. At the same time we are spiritually accelerating and the two are intricately interconnected. One cannot occur without the other.

Complex, I know. I am far from understanding it. I hope my explanation helps you somewhat understand what is happening right now.

Sources: Plasma Radiation, WikipediaĀ , Plasma

 

 

 

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Another Big One Coming

Just a quick post because my Team is driving me crazy about this upcoming Shift. I am already feeling it. It hit me at lunch time. Third-eye wide open and blazing, fatigue slamming me like a ton of bricks, eyes went dry, etc. Then they were pushing me to do a video. Fine, okay already. But really I didn’t have much to add. It is just going to be bigger than the last one and more crap is going to surface to be inspected. Probably more sleep interruptions.

My Team was talking about Gamma radiation and pulses hitting the Earth. I didn’t go into any of that in the video. I am flat out exhausted and they want me to get all scientific? The least they could do is send in a clear channel via my crown so I can take a break. Maybe next time. šŸ™‚

By the way, I read Lisa Transcendence Brown just now. Guess what she said is going on? We are being hit by Gamma which helps us clear timelines. We do thisĀ mostly when we are asleep and being woken up when there is something that needs our attention. Thus, the sleep disturbances. Gamma helps us – yep – Get’r done. She spelled it ” git’r’done”, even more hillbilly thanĀ the way I spelled it. Hahahaha!

I love how the universe works.

Guess it is time to prepare for sleep, er…work.

Ā 

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The Galactic StarBEing Awakening in a Human Body

Excerpts fromĀ an articleĀ written by Lisa Transcendence Brown. Full article here.

I found this article back in January. It kept coming up in my FB feed and was also postedĀ in the Walk-in group. It came up again yesterday, so I re-read it.

This article is the best explanation I have found for the process I am going through. This is why I am being told by my TeamĀ that I am experiencing a walk-in and am finally AWAKE. I am reintegrating a part of myself, my Light, that broke off a very long time ago.

We are becoming WHOLE again.

A StarBEing holds codes and sequences beyond the human understanding and the physical body is a storage container, if you will. When a StarBeing is “forced” into living as a human by unconscious humans, their expanded consciousness is suppressed and “shut down”. This shutting down is what we call “going to sleep” or “the slumber”, also known as amnesia between the realms and veils. It stagnates the StarBEing and forces their DNA to distort itself and to separate off in order to survive here. This creates discord within the physical body vessel, physical pain, emotional pain and suppression that ultimately must be REVERSED back to purity and love again. The magnitude that one experiences this “force” through not understanding will determine the amount of distortions created, suffering and reversal necessary to re-program back to light again. Where an individual does not understand, they will do this to their self. This is why it’s so important to re-educate all according to the higher frequency realms of NEW Earth NOW…….

…..When one awakens, the body has been asleep. Some are walk-ins, some incarnated at birth and now we have “walk-throughs” and “pass-throughs” and many others coming through. Only the human needs to put this in a box to understand it. It doesn’t really matter, other than how one chooses to DO from this moment NOW…….

…..All are here to merge and unify to release the SEPARATION CONSCIOUSNESS that kept one unconscious and asleep. As these long awaited gamma rays continue to increase the bombardment of galactic light, intensity and distortions shall be magnified to make visible any old density programming and illusions still held within. The old matrix gridwork gone that kept all held together before, bizarre and extreme is the new way for one still holding onto the need/desire to remain unconscious.

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Riding the Dragon

The Kundalini acceleration continues. I am definitely “riding the Dragon”.

I was awakened at 3am from a dream in which I was joining a new group. Prior to this I had visited a team I was overlooking and ran into a gentleman who was overly enamored of me. I was warned that my Light is amplified at this time and to expect more such encounters both in dreams/the astral and in the physical.

I was called to a meeting. I was late so it was embarrassing to be called in at the last minute. There was a special guest in front of the group. I felt out of place. Everyone was so much older than me it seemed. I was worried he would ask me to introduce myself. Thankfully he didn’t. Instead he began to read us all a story. All I recall of it now was that it was titled, “La Luna” and was about an ancient healing modality yet to be utilized on Earth. The healing was performed in conjunction with the phases of the moon.

I was awakened at this time and there was with me a young man who was very excited to meet me. He was not a guide but a member of the new group I had joined. His accent was odd and I could not place it. His energy was sky high and he was completely joyous. His name was Gerard and he told me he was from New Caledonia. I recognized the name but could not place it. He told me it was near Indonesia and French, which is why his accent was so strange. I looked it up this morning and sure enough this information is valid. So if you are Gerard – nice to meet you and I look forward to working with you.

Gerard had much to say. Thankfully, I now keep a notebook and pen beside my bed for times such as these. Here is what he told me:

Your Divine Fire has been lit. It will burn for the next 12-16 months. You are riding the Dragon. You are not doing this alone. Your counterpart is as well. There has been a Divine Union. You have a group of four; an inner circle. Like 2 split atoms; 2 became 4. 4 is a number you are familiar with. It repeats in your life. Your flame will burn uncontrollably until it reaches the 12th house (12th chakra? this is image I saw – chakras way up high over my head). This is complete embodiment. Whole. This process follows the cycles of the moon. La Luna. The magik of La Luna. Your fire will attract others. Be aware of your own energy. You are Brilliant and will be from now on. You are Awake.Ā 

As he was talking to me there was a strange sensation in my root chakra. It felt like a hollow, glass tube was there. I could feel its expansiveness but the energy was normal.

I was able to return to sleep. I guess I am just too exhausted now after several days of interrupted sleep.

Root Chakra ExplosionĀ 

I found myself in a dream in which I was riding in a large SUV with family. We had been driving all night and stopped. That was when I saw the airbag had deployed but on the outside of the vehicle. It covered the entire hood.

As members of my group got out to deflate it, I saw a very tall individual wearing a blue jumpsuit. I identified the person as “she” and ran up to her calling her “sister”. She was strange looking – her face so dark I could not make out features. I remember her inviting me to join with her. I told her, “Not in this life, sister. Maybe in the next one.” I was so enthused at seeing her, though, that I gave her a hug. She was so tall that I had to jump into her arms to hug her. She had to be at least 8-9ft tall. She embraced me and kissed me. I held on to her and then realized she had initiated a kind of activation in my root chakra. Energy began to explode down toward my feet. It was a spectacular feeling and so intense that it woke me up. It continued for about 10 minutes afterward. The energy was so intense that it expanded down past my knees in a bubble. I could see it even – it was cherry red but not a solid color. It was more opalescent.

I have had root chakra activity in the past but nothing like this. It was pure ecstasy but also very sexual. I had no control over my body. It is embarrassing but at the same time I don’t really care. It was a spectacular experience.

After the energy abated my entire lower body up to my naval felt similar to how it felt after I had my babies. It is similar to intense menstrual cramping or back labor. I had a flash then of what had really happened. There had been some kind of spiritual surgery done and an intentional activation of the root chakra. It was explained that it was in preparation for the next step in the process coming on Tuesday.

I suspect that the tall, androgynous looking person wearing a blue jumper was likely an ET and one I am familiar with and not afraid of. This is likely why I could not see “her” face as well.

Implants

I was able to once again fall asleep (thank you!) but my sleep kept getting interrupted. I don’t know why They have to keep waking me up! I just wanted to sleep!

Anyway, I awoke this time around from a sign that was placed in front of my vision. I saw the message upon it written in cursive. It said, “Implants Placed.” Then below that was my real, legal name.

Of course this woke me with a start. This has not been the first time I have had a message about implants. I am not sure what they mean, but since my “other” name was used, I suspect these implants are being removed. Good.

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A Selection of True Awakening Experiences Part II

I am participating in Barbara Frankenā€™s February challenge and sharing my personal awakening experience in A Selection of True Awakening Experiences Part II. šŸ™‚

When I consider my own spiritual awakening, I am at first overwhelmed by the enormity of the task I have set for myself when participating in this challenge. If I start in a linear fashion, from the very beginning of my awakening in 2003, the length of this post would be unbearably long. However, if I look at the various paths I took and the lessons I learned along the way, the task is much easier to swallow.

Constantly Questioning

From the minute I could form my first thought, there was a question. I haven’t stopped asking questions since.

As a child one of the first things I recall doing when I had the ability to, was to go back to my very first memory and remember all I could. Before that first memory, there was nothing. Just blackness. This intrigued me because I could feel something was being blocked from my view. Why was this? Why am I here? What happened before I got here? Where was I before I got here? Who am I?

Sometimes asking these questions sent me down unbearably dark paths for when I asked, ā€œWhy am I here?ā€ I often asked my someone external to myself like my mother or my sister. Other times it brought me into great moments of joy and awe for sometimes I was presented with a question in return ā€“ What do you think? – and when that happened so did some pretty wonderful realizations.

Meeting Myself

Ultimately, like all those who go searching the deepest, darkest places, I was ran face first into the many facets of myself. I opened a Pandora’s Box and there was no going back. I had to confront myself; everything “good” and everything “dark” had to be inspected. I did this with the help of my Companion, Steven, who is my counterpart in Spirit. He is the part of me who Remembers, as he likes to say. And his role is to share some of that memory with me, in little bits and pieces. But I have to ask the right questions. It is all in asking the right questions.

Eventually, all this questioning, led me to my spiritual gifts. This happened seemingly all at once but really it took about a month for them all to manifest. Suddenly, I was a medium, a healer, a medical intuitive, a channel, and a psychic all at once. This threw me into a tailspin. I quit my job, changed my name, and went on a journey which ultimately led to theĀ beginning of my Dark Night of the Soul. It was an eye-opening journey and one that taught me how to love myself when in the past I could barely look at my own reflection.

During my Dark Night my spiritual progression intensified exponentially. I had spontaneous past life memories that I would re-experience as if they were happening in the present. These would be presented to me for inspection and clearing. My Companion or one of my Assistants would take me through the life, asking me questions similar to how a hypnotherapist does when they walk their client through a past life. Each question would open up more of the life and the accompanying emotions. This was an excruciating process as you can imagine. Many lives had to be visited more than once in order to be cleared. Some are still in the process of clearing.

To date, I have Remembered 30+ Earth lives. The time frame extends from before 10,000BC to the present. Many of them are recorded in my blog sequentially, but I have not yet included them all. I have also recalled lives from other planets/dimensions.

Self-Exploration

In addition to revisiting my past lives during my Dark Night,Ā I also experienced my first spontaneous OBE. This opened up a path of exploration that I never knew existed. What was most amazing is that OBEs finally allowed me to be face-to-face with my Team of guides and, most importantly, with my Companion. Talk about exciting! Suddenly I was visiting other dimensions, other planets, other realms, and my Companion was always there with me. Sometimes I would see him, touch him, hear him. Other times I would just feel him next to me, guiding me and showing me what I needed to see. Through OBEs I was able to tap into yet another unknown part of myself ā€“ the timeless, multidimensional, manifesting, and powerful I AM.

Kundalini

Right from the get-go I had Kundalini activity. I didn’t know what it was at first, so it was quite scary. As I got use to it, however, she became like an old friend. She started from the top down at first and all I can say is, ā€œWow!ā€ Nothing compares to a top-down Kundalini activation. Instant awareness and connection to Source/All That Is. Intense clearing, spontaneous past life recollections, spirit guide communication, and every kind of healing you can imagine.

Then she went dormant for over 7 years accompanied by a seemingly complete loss of my spiritual gifts, a significant reduction in OBEs, and extremely limited communication with my Team of guides. She returned with a vengeance in 2014, this time on a wild ride from root to crown. The sensations this time around are even more intense and the experiences more profound than the firstĀ and I don’t think she will be letting up anytime soon.

Contact

The most recent path I have been led down has been the most difficult for me. Contact was made with me by other worldly Beings – Beings from other dimensions, other planets, other times. The first visits were while I was OOB and fully aware. They showed themselves as my own reflection in the mirror or would stand in the shadows. Other times they would wake me in the morning for ā€œbriefingsā€ and I would have intense channeling sessions where my crown would seem to just open up and information (light) would pour into me. Oftentimes this would come in the form of codes, or light language. These experiences were also accompanied by memories of the “work” I do as part of the Galactic Federation of Light Ground Crew as a grid-worker and energy worker/healer.

Service

Finally, I am Remembering more and more of my path/purpose here. I am just now beginning to see it fully forming ahead of me; though, unbeknownst to me, I have been traveling it from the beginning. It is the path of service- the reason I am here. To help. To be of assistance. To prepare the path for those to come. I am not completely sure what this will look like but I am more than ready to get started.

So this is my story of awakening thus far and in a nut shell. It is ever-changing and I know it will not be the same today as tomorrow or the next day. My Team knows I get bored easily and need to be kept on my toes and they do their job extremely well! I am never disappointed. šŸ™‚

Next up in the challenge is Mick.

 

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More Heart Chakra Blasts

Today started out well enough and then by noon it was energy blasts to my high heart and heart center followed by a strange excitement/nervousness/panic – in that order. lol These would come in at an angle from my back throughĀ to the front in waves that lasted anywhere from 5 to 10 minutes. Afterward, I became very hot and thirsty and had to lay down several times on the floor to ground. My throat, crown and third eye were all buzzing with energy. I also found I could not go near the computer as it would trigger a weird panic. This also happened around the TV and other large electronics. A first for me and just plain weird!

By 4pm things began to settle and now I feel almost normal except that now that I am typing and sitting at my PC my heart is doing weird things again and I have energy around the back of my head.

Also, a strange thing happened toĀ me this morning, prior to all this heart activity. While making breakfastĀ I froze mid-egg-breaking as a knowingness hit me – hard. IĀ suddenlyĀ knew that very soon I am going to be asked to move on to my next step. One of these happened in April 2014 and another happened in October 2002. TheĀ formerĀ was a tear-jerking realization and message from my Team. The latter was an actual command to “Get out now”. I guess this was part of the message I got to “Get er’ done” earlier today. Pretty funny then, not so much now.

I don’t know if the heart chakra blasts are connected to this sudden knowing or not. I was not too happy in getting this knowing because this next step/move is a very uncomfortable one. I hope beyond hope that I get more time to sort things, but sadly, the way these instances have worked out in the past, things really move. FAST.

Now that things are settling I feel like a major shift just occurred. I don’t know exactly what it means or what happened, but I can feel it. Something major just cleared out.

Oh and just so happens the K-Index is still in the red. STILL. Geez!

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Today’s Energy

Just an FYI – I won’t be posting all my videos here. So check out my YouTube channel if you are interested in other ones.Ā 

So the energy is intense today isn’t it? I’ve been riding the wave all day long and on one of those energy high’s I love so much. We are in the midst of an intense upgrade if you haven’t noticed. Looks like my Team wasn’t kidding when they warned me of its coming 8 days ago. Soon = Soon, this time around. lol

I’ve discovered that, for me at least, focusing on my heart center at this time is not the way to go. If I focus there I go into brain-dead mode and feel like I am floating around in La-La land. No good. I have kids to take care of and life to live. I can’t function in La-La land. So, I’ve been outside most of this beautiful Spring (yes I said Spring) day. It is near 80 degreesĀ today in Texas with clear skies and blooming trees. That ground hog wasn’t joking when he said Spring was coming early!

Speaking of “ground” hogs (lol),I have been focusing all day on grounding, grounding, grounding. Yet even though I keep doing grounding things – being outside, exercise, essential oils, staying hydrated, eating grounding foods – I am still feeling my energyĀ is all over the place.Ā Thankfully I am at home and not interacting with groups of people or trying to have two-way communication with an adult. šŸ˜‰

Yet I am still on this amazing high and feel so full of energy and information that I am ready to burst. I feel like a can of soda that has been shaken and shaken and shaken and when opened will spew it’s contents all over the place. This upgrade is indeed intense and I can’t seem to channel all this extra energy no matter how hard I try! If you watch the video, though I sound out of it (brain fog), my eyes are so dang blue! I don’t have a clue why they did that other than to blame all this crazy energy. The whole time I was trying to talk in the video I was spacing out and forgetting things. Talk about La-La land!

Oh, I just remembered. I was told, two days in a row now (keep forgetting) that there are “craft” of the inter-dimensional kind above Ecuador, Spain and Paris, France. I don’t know why They tell me such things. When I asked why, They told me these areas were areas that need attention – unstable energy that looks like jagged lines of green and yellows. Apparently the grid is still in flux and needing reinforcement. How this correlates to what is going on globally is beyond me. I don’t have time to watch the news and if I did my I would likely go into zone-out mode. I would love to hear if you all know, though. Fill me in. šŸ˜‰

 

 

 

 

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Heart Sensations Return

I’ve begun this post several times and each time deleted it in its entirety. I’m not sure exactly why, though.

There has been a strange energy today following me around. It is not bad or good, just shifty, like the energy is about to take a leap forward. I checked the K-index and there is an active storm but nothing that would normally cause me to notice.

Perhaps it has to do with what happened last night. Last night is what I originally was trying to post about and kept deleting. I will summarize and just say that I had some intense heart chakra sensations. These didn’t hurt. In fact, they were the good kind and went all the way from front to back. It was like someone placed a tube right through my heart center and energy pouredĀ through it.

The heart sensations came with specific thoughts and knowingness. It happened at a time when I was speaking with someone, a kind of counselor. I was telling her about things I could not sort out in my life – very personal things. This is when the heart sensations kicked in. I was lucky I did not burst into tears. I was able to get out of the conversation in time. Then I was just in shock for a while. I had not expected my heart to burst open like that. I had done such a good job of shutting it down – or so I’d thought.

Then, after I returned home and the kids were in bed my heart started doing it again and I was overcome with an intense shaking all over my body. I am familiar with the feeling. It is something I had to deal with every time I did a mediumship reading and made contact with Spirit. It is like their energy is too much for me. It can get so bad that my teeth chatter – thankfully it did not get that bad last night. The shaking can also happen when I am talking with another person about deeply personal things. I have never quite figured out why it happens, though.

I wondered why I was having the shaking. I was not tuning into Spirit and not talking to anyone, so it made no sense. I felt my Team near and I wondered if maybe it was coming from them. As if to answer my question, I heard my guide ask me to focus on how I felt. When I did this, I could sense a blockage at my heart level. I was told that I was resisting the energy – the heart energy – and that I have been avoiding something.

And then the shaking was really bad.

And then it was just…gone as wasĀ the heart energy.

When I awoke this morning my dreams were instantly gone as soon as I tried to recover them. Frustrated, I tried to feel what happened in the night and knew I had agreed yet again to something, but I don’t know what. My heart chakra lit up again but faded not long after. With it, I was asked if I was willing to accept what it was telling me. I said I was, but honestly I am not sure about any of it. I don’t know what it is telling me, or at least I don’t think I do. Honestly, I am afraid of knowing.

Right before I got out of bed my Team again reminded me of the upgrade that is soon to come. I was told this time that it may frighten me. Then I saw a visual of light pouring down into my crown chakra and going all the way down through all my chakras and into my feet. From the looks of it, it didn’t seem so bad, but then if they say it might scare me, well, it probably will.

It has me wondering now if the strange feeling I’ve had all day has anything to do with this coming upgrade. I guess I’ll find out.

Meet-Up

There is one other thing. A group I am a part of on FB is planning a meeting in Mt. Shasta, California in May. I have been following the preparations from the beginning. YesterdayĀ I decided, out of the blue, that I should go. I told my husband about it and, strangely, he had no objections. When I communicated today with the contact about arranging my flight my heart chakra was blazing with energy. Even typing about it now makes my heart light up. I got thoroughly excited about going and my energy went sky high.

Then, in the afternoon, I began to doubt my decision about attending because I only know the people who will be there via the internet. I also began to panic over something very odd. I had this strange feeling that if I went I would not want to come home. ThenĀ an internal panic button went off and I got a strange split in two feeling. It was really odd and I almost thought I was about to go OOB right then and there.

After this happened the heart energy ceased – well up until now anyway. I am wondering if this is any indicator of what it is that I am not willing to know/accept. Part of me thinks it is and when I try to consider it, the fear returns. All I want to do is cuss a million cuss words just considering that possibility.

 

 

by

Becoming Whole

At around 5pm CST I received the first of several blasts of energy to my heart center. They did not last long, the longest lasting maybe a few minutes.

All this happened when I was watching T.V. and alone. I had the house to myself and was enjoying just being. This is when my attention was suddenly diverted from the T.V. to my left. I swear I felt/heard/sensed someone trying to get my attention. Then came the heart blast. I smiled from ear to ear.

During maybe the third or fourth heart blast I heard very loudly, “Did you miss me?” This shocked me for it seemed to come from within and without at the same time. Usually I can determine a direction and locate where the message is coming from, but this one seemed to originate from within me, from within my very center. Woah.

This startled me to the point that I began to panic a bit. I was reminded to stay out of my mind and when I did that and focused back on my heart the energy there increased and I calmed substantially.

I recognized the voice and the feeling behind it as that of my Companion. So quiet these last few weeks it was/is nice to have communication from him again.

Every once in a while I will convince myself that I am insane and that this entire experience I am having is some kind of psychotic break with reality. This rarely lasts long as I am instantly reminded of the very real experiences I have had and the amazing feeling of love that accompanies them. It is like I am being presented with the decision – to Believe or not to Believe – over and over again. This is what happened last night as I sat alone, overwhelmed once again with what was happening to me. In that moment I was reminded that I created this experience – it is purposeful. I am on a journey of reUnification; a journey to wholeness. And I heard, “We can do this, for We already are.”

We Can Be All Places, All Times

As I continued to try and watch T.V. my attention continued to be diverted to other things. My mind would blank out and I would feel I was receiving communication but there were no words, no images of this communication. I was just a receiving. Then there came an idea that I could choose to be in more than once place at once – that this was my true nature. I Remembered briefly how to do this, how to be in multiple places at once. I do this when I view the future for myself or another. I have done it before, but a limited version of it, one my human mind can accept for to view too many timelines at once can overwhelm the mind and create a break with reality.

I attempted to see the future, or at least one of them, and felt myself to be observing myself and moving through time to a point in the not so distant future. I saw my family arriving and me helping with the baby. Then I shifted to look at present time reality. Where was my family at this moment? I saw them settling into the car and knew they were about 20 minutes away. I saw the inside of the car with clarity and saw my middle son drifting off to sleep.

This is remote viewing and I have done it before. I rarely do it because I have a lack of belief in it caused by not bringing back information that can be proved. I do it sometimes on accident, though, and to my surprise it has been proven. Still I don’t do it often for lack of belief.

I discovered the clarity of my perceptions in remote viewing is increased when I have a psychic bond with the individual(s) I am viewing. This can be done if I have a link to an object or place as well. However, I find it fascinating that I can view the happenings of someone I have never met from a far distance just because there is a strong link between us. It is beautiful but at the same time I feel wrong to do it. I feel I am invading their privacy. Yet I know they also can see/perceiveĀ me. For this particular person it happens quite by accident, without any intention on my part. Why? I have no idea but it is so astonishingly clear and makes me smile every time. In my life I have never experienced such a link to anyone, not even my own child.

Becoming Whole

After about an hour or so of on and off heart blasts, I got out the wine. This stopped the heart energy but my third-eye flickered on and off and my Companion did not leave. I could still feel him and still feel he wanted me to focus on the remote viewing “lesson”. Sigh.

I fell asleep quickly and slept deeply (thank you wine!) but awoke at around 5:30am with my Companion very present. I recalled my dreams and remembered what had been occurring through the night. We were together discussing my inability to accept my “other half”. I was reminded that this body is but a shell that I occupy for a short time. In reality I am neither male or female. The dream, which involved a discussion about a man who was undergoing a sex change/gender reassignment was vivid in my mind. How could a man be a woman, too? Yet, that is what we are. We are both. Even in understanding this, my human mind struggled to understand it. How can I be both?

I had flashes of my Companion in his non-human form. In this form he had no gender. He reminded me that We can take on any form we choose. He reminded me again the he is me and I am him. This is so hard for me to digest because I am talking to him, which means then that I am talking to myself. Talk about making a person feel insane.

I am reminded that we are in stasis – We I mean. That We are a Pleiadian Starseed, from the planet Lyra. That We are currently experiencing on Earth to help but also to grow, and that we have been doing this for many hundreds of Earth years. We split in two to do this. He lived and I observed and then vice versa. There is something very special about this lifetime for Us. We will both be in this body. I don’t understand it fully. It is a bit overwhelming and I find myself back at the point where I want him to go away. Of course, he never goes away.

I also know we are now writing Chapter 3.