Category Archives: energy

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Riding the Dragon

The Kundalini acceleration continues. I am definitely “riding the Dragon”.

I was awakened at 3am from a dream in which I was joining a new group. Prior to this I had visited a team I was overlooking and ran into a gentleman who was overly enamored of me. I was warned that my Light is amplified at this time and to expect more such encounters both in dreams/the astral and in the physical.

I was called to a meeting. I was late so it was embarrassing to be called in at the last minute. There was a special guest in front of the group. I felt out of place. Everyone was so much older than me it seemed. I was worried he would ask me to introduce myself. Thankfully he didn’t. Instead he began to read us all a story. All I recall of it now was that it was titled, “La Luna” and was about an ancient healing modality yet to be utilized on Earth. The healing was performed in conjunction with the phases of the moon.

I was awakened at this time and there was with me a young man who was very excited to meet me. He was not a guide but a member of the new group I had joined. His accent was odd and I could not place it. His energy was sky high and he was completely joyous. His name was Gerard and he told me he was from New Caledonia. I recognized the name but could not place it. He told me it was near Indonesia and French, which is why his accent was so strange. I looked it up this morning and sure enough this information is valid. So if you are Gerard – nice to meet you and I look forward to working with you.

Gerard had much to say. Thankfully, I now keep a notebook and pen beside my bed for times such as these. Here is what he told me:

Your Divine Fire has been lit. It will burn for the next 12-16 months. You are riding the Dragon. You are not doing this alone. Your counterpart is as well. There has been a Divine Union. You have a group of four; an inner circle. Like 2 split atoms; 2 became 4. 4 is a number you are familiar with. It repeats in your life. Your flame will burn uncontrollably until it reaches the 12th house (12th chakra? this is image I saw – chakras way up high over my head). This is complete embodiment. Whole. This process follows the cycles of the moon. La Luna. The magik of La Luna. Your fire will attract others. Be aware of your own energy. You are Brilliant and will be from now on. You are Awake. 

As he was talking to me there was a strange sensation in my root chakra. It felt like a hollow, glass tube was there. I could feel its expansiveness but the energy was normal.

I was able to return to sleep. I guess I am just too exhausted now after several days of interrupted sleep.

Root Chakra Explosion 

I found myself in a dream in which I was riding in a large SUV with family. We had been driving all night and stopped. That was when I saw the airbag had deployed but on the outside of the vehicle. It covered the entire hood.

As members of my group got out to deflate it, I saw a very tall individual wearing a blue jumpsuit. I identified the person as “she” and ran up to her calling her “sister”. She was strange looking – her face so dark I could not make out features. I remember her inviting me to join with her. I told her, “Not in this life, sister. Maybe in the next one.” I was so enthused at seeing her, though, that I gave her a hug. She was so tall that I had to jump into her arms to hug her. She had to be at least 8-9ft tall. She embraced me and kissed me. I held on to her and then realized she had initiated a kind of activation in my root chakra. Energy began to explode down toward my feet. It was a spectacular feeling and so intense that it woke me up. It continued for about 10 minutes afterward. The energy was so intense that it expanded down past my knees in a bubble. I could see it even – it was cherry red but not a solid color. It was more opalescent.

I have had root chakra activity in the past but nothing like this. It was pure ecstasy but also very sexual. I had no control over my body. It is embarrassing but at the same time I don’t really care. It was a spectacular experience.

After the energy abated my entire lower body up to my naval felt similar to how it felt after I had my babies. It is similar to intense menstrual cramping or back labor. I had a flash then of what had really happened. There had been some kind of spiritual surgery done and an intentional activation of the root chakra. It was explained that it was in preparation for the next step in the process coming on Tuesday.

I suspect that the tall, androgynous looking person wearing a blue jumper was likely an ET and one I am familiar with and not afraid of. This is likely why I could not see “her” face as well.

Implants

I was able to once again fall asleep (thank you!) but my sleep kept getting interrupted. I don’t know why They have to keep waking me up! I just wanted to sleep!

Anyway, I awoke this time around from a sign that was placed in front of my vision. I saw the message upon it written in cursive. It said, “Implants Placed.” Then below that was my real, legal name.

Of course this woke me with a start. This has not been the first time I have had a message about implants. I am not sure what they mean, but since my “other” name was used, I suspect these implants are being removed. Good.

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A Selection of True Awakening Experiences Part II

I am participating in Barbara Franken’s February challenge and sharing my personal awakening experience in A Selection of True Awakening Experiences Part II. 🙂

When I consider my own spiritual awakening, I am at first overwhelmed by the enormity of the task I have set for myself when participating in this challenge. If I start in a linear fashion, from the very beginning of my awakening in 2003, the length of this post would be unbearably long. However, if I look at the various paths I took and the lessons I learned along the way, the task is much easier to swallow.

Constantly Questioning

From the minute I could form my first thought, there was a question. I haven’t stopped asking questions since.

As a child one of the first things I recall doing when I had the ability to, was to go back to my very first memory and remember all I could. Before that first memory, there was nothing. Just blackness. This intrigued me because I could feel something was being blocked from my view. Why was this? Why am I here? What happened before I got here? Where was I before I got here? Who am I?

Sometimes asking these questions sent me down unbearably dark paths for when I asked, “Why am I here?” I often asked my someone external to myself like my mother or my sister. Other times it brought me into great moments of joy and awe for sometimes I was presented with a question in return – What do you think? – and when that happened so did some pretty wonderful realizations.

Meeting Myself

Ultimately, like all those who go searching the deepest, darkest places, I was ran face first into the many facets of myself. I opened a Pandora’s Box and there was no going back. I had to confront myself; everything “good” and everything “dark” had to be inspected. I did this with the help of my Companion, Steven, who is my counterpart in Spirit. He is the part of me who Remembers, as he likes to say. And his role is to share some of that memory with me, in little bits and pieces. But I have to ask the right questions. It is all in asking the right questions.

Eventually, all this questioning, led me to my spiritual gifts. This happened seemingly all at once but really it took about a month for them all to manifest. Suddenly, I was a medium, a healer, a medical intuitive, a channel, and a psychic all at once. This threw me into a tailspin. I quit my job, changed my name, and went on a journey which ultimately led to the beginning of my Dark Night of the Soul. It was an eye-opening journey and one that taught me how to love myself when in the past I could barely look at my own reflection.

During my Dark Night my spiritual progression intensified exponentially. I had spontaneous past life memories that I would re-experience as if they were happening in the present. These would be presented to me for inspection and clearing. My Companion or one of my Assistants would take me through the life, asking me questions similar to how a hypnotherapist does when they walk their client through a past life. Each question would open up more of the life and the accompanying emotions. This was an excruciating process as you can imagine. Many lives had to be visited more than once in order to be cleared. Some are still in the process of clearing.

To date, I have Remembered 30+ Earth lives. The time frame extends from before 10,000BC to the present. Many of them are recorded in my blog sequentially, but I have not yet included them all. I have also recalled lives from other planets/dimensions.

Self-Exploration

In addition to revisiting my past lives during my Dark Night, I also experienced my first spontaneous OBE. This opened up a path of exploration that I never knew existed. What was most amazing is that OBEs finally allowed me to be face-to-face with my Team of guides and, most importantly, with my Companion. Talk about exciting! Suddenly I was visiting other dimensions, other planets, other realms, and my Companion was always there with me. Sometimes I would see him, touch him, hear him. Other times I would just feel him next to me, guiding me and showing me what I needed to see. Through OBEs I was able to tap into yet another unknown part of myself – the timeless, multidimensional, manifesting, and powerful I AM.

Kundalini

Right from the get-go I had Kundalini activity. I didn’t know what it was at first, so it was quite scary. As I got use to it, however, she became like an old friend. She started from the top down at first and all I can say is, “Wow!” Nothing compares to a top-down Kundalini activation. Instant awareness and connection to Source/All That Is. Intense clearing, spontaneous past life recollections, spirit guide communication, and every kind of healing you can imagine.

Then she went dormant for over 7 years accompanied by a seemingly complete loss of my spiritual gifts, a significant reduction in OBEs, and extremely limited communication with my Team of guides. She returned with a vengeance in 2014, this time on a wild ride from root to crown. The sensations this time around are even more intense and the experiences more profound than the first and I don’t think she will be letting up anytime soon.

Contact

The most recent path I have been led down has been the most difficult for me. Contact was made with me by other worldly Beings – Beings from other dimensions, other planets, other times. The first visits were while I was OOB and fully aware. They showed themselves as my own reflection in the mirror or would stand in the shadows. Other times they would wake me in the morning for “briefings” and I would have intense channeling sessions where my crown would seem to just open up and information (light) would pour into me. Oftentimes this would come in the form of codes, or light language. These experiences were also accompanied by memories of the “work” I do as part of the Galactic Federation of Light Ground Crew as a grid-worker and energy worker/healer.

Service

Finally, I am Remembering more and more of my path/purpose here. I am just now beginning to see it fully forming ahead of me; though, unbeknownst to me, I have been traveling it from the beginning. It is the path of service- the reason I am here. To help. To be of assistance. To prepare the path for those to come. I am not completely sure what this will look like but I am more than ready to get started.

So this is my story of awakening thus far and in a nut shell. It is ever-changing and I know it will not be the same today as tomorrow or the next day. My Team knows I get bored easily and need to be kept on my toes and they do their job extremely well! I am never disappointed. 🙂

Next up in the challenge is Mick.

 

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More Heart Chakra Blasts

Today started out well enough and then by noon it was energy blasts to my high heart and heart center followed by a strange excitement/nervousness/panic – in that order. lol These would come in at an angle from my back through to the front in waves that lasted anywhere from 5 to 10 minutes. Afterward, I became very hot and thirsty and had to lay down several times on the floor to ground. My throat, crown and third eye were all buzzing with energy. I also found I could not go near the computer as it would trigger a weird panic. This also happened around the TV and other large electronics. A first for me and just plain weird!

By 4pm things began to settle and now I feel almost normal except that now that I am typing and sitting at my PC my heart is doing weird things again and I have energy around the back of my head.

Also, a strange thing happened to me this morning, prior to all this heart activity. While making breakfast I froze mid-egg-breaking as a knowingness hit me – hard. I suddenly knew that very soon I am going to be asked to move on to my next step. One of these happened in April 2014 and another happened in October 2002. The former was a tear-jerking realization and message from my Team. The latter was an actual command to “Get out now”. I guess this was part of the message I got to “Get er’ done” earlier today. Pretty funny then, not so much now.

I don’t know if the heart chakra blasts are connected to this sudden knowing or not. I was not too happy in getting this knowing because this next step/move is a very uncomfortable one. I hope beyond hope that I get more time to sort things, but sadly, the way these instances have worked out in the past, things really move. FAST.

Now that things are settling I feel like a major shift just occurred. I don’t know exactly what it means or what happened, but I can feel it. Something major just cleared out.

Oh and just so happens the K-Index is still in the red. STILL. Geez!

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Today’s Energy

Just an FYI – I won’t be posting all my videos here. So check out my YouTube channel if you are interested in other ones. 

So the energy is intense today isn’t it? I’ve been riding the wave all day long and on one of those energy high’s I love so much. We are in the midst of an intense upgrade if you haven’t noticed. Looks like my Team wasn’t kidding when they warned me of its coming 8 days ago. Soon = Soon, this time around. lol

I’ve discovered that, for me at least, focusing on my heart center at this time is not the way to go. If I focus there I go into brain-dead mode and feel like I am floating around in La-La land. No good. I have kids to take care of and life to live. I can’t function in La-La land. So, I’ve been outside most of this beautiful Spring (yes I said Spring) day. It is near 80 degrees today in Texas with clear skies and blooming trees. That ground hog wasn’t joking when he said Spring was coming early!

Speaking of “ground” hogs (lol),I have been focusing all day on grounding, grounding, grounding. Yet even though I keep doing grounding things – being outside, exercise, essential oils, staying hydrated, eating grounding foods – I am still feeling my energy is all over the place. Thankfully I am at home and not interacting with groups of people or trying to have two-way communication with an adult. 😉

Yet I am still on this amazing high and feel so full of energy and information that I am ready to burst. I feel like a can of soda that has been shaken and shaken and shaken and when opened will spew it’s contents all over the place. This upgrade is indeed intense and I can’t seem to channel all this extra energy no matter how hard I try! If you watch the video, though I sound out of it (brain fog), my eyes are so dang blue! I don’t have a clue why they did that other than to blame all this crazy energy. The whole time I was trying to talk in the video I was spacing out and forgetting things. Talk about La-La land!

Oh, I just remembered. I was told, two days in a row now (keep forgetting) that there are “craft” of the inter-dimensional kind above Ecuador, Spain and Paris, France. I don’t know why They tell me such things. When I asked why, They told me these areas were areas that need attention – unstable energy that looks like jagged lines of green and yellows. Apparently the grid is still in flux and needing reinforcement. How this correlates to what is going on globally is beyond me. I don’t have time to watch the news and if I did my I would likely go into zone-out mode. I would love to hear if you all know, though. Fill me in. 😉

 

 

 

 

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Heart Sensations Return

I’ve begun this post several times and each time deleted it in its entirety. I’m not sure exactly why, though.

There has been a strange energy today following me around. It is not bad or good, just shifty, like the energy is about to take a leap forward. I checked the K-index and there is an active storm but nothing that would normally cause me to notice.

Perhaps it has to do with what happened last night. Last night is what I originally was trying to post about and kept deleting. I will summarize and just say that I had some intense heart chakra sensations. These didn’t hurt. In fact, they were the good kind and went all the way from front to back. It was like someone placed a tube right through my heart center and energy poured through it.

The heart sensations came with specific thoughts and knowingness. It happened at a time when I was speaking with someone, a kind of counselor. I was telling her about things I could not sort out in my life – very personal things. This is when the heart sensations kicked in. I was lucky I did not burst into tears. I was able to get out of the conversation in time. Then I was just in shock for a while. I had not expected my heart to burst open like that. I had done such a good job of shutting it down – or so I’d thought.

Then, after I returned home and the kids were in bed my heart started doing it again and I was overcome with an intense shaking all over my body. I am familiar with the feeling. It is something I had to deal with every time I did a mediumship reading and made contact with Spirit. It is like their energy is too much for me. It can get so bad that my teeth chatter – thankfully it did not get that bad last night. The shaking can also happen when I am talking with another person about deeply personal things. I have never quite figured out why it happens, though.

I wondered why I was having the shaking. I was not tuning into Spirit and not talking to anyone, so it made no sense. I felt my Team near and I wondered if maybe it was coming from them. As if to answer my question, I heard my guide ask me to focus on how I felt. When I did this, I could sense a blockage at my heart level. I was told that I was resisting the energy – the heart energy – and that I have been avoiding something.

And then the shaking was really bad.

And then it was just…gone as was the heart energy.

When I awoke this morning my dreams were instantly gone as soon as I tried to recover them. Frustrated, I tried to feel what happened in the night and knew I had agreed yet again to something, but I don’t know what. My heart chakra lit up again but faded not long after. With it, I was asked if I was willing to accept what it was telling me. I said I was, but honestly I am not sure about any of it. I don’t know what it is telling me, or at least I don’t think I do. Honestly, I am afraid of knowing.

Right before I got out of bed my Team again reminded me of the upgrade that is soon to come. I was told this time that it may frighten me. Then I saw a visual of light pouring down into my crown chakra and going all the way down through all my chakras and into my feet. From the looks of it, it didn’t seem so bad, but then if they say it might scare me, well, it probably will.

It has me wondering now if the strange feeling I’ve had all day has anything to do with this coming upgrade. I guess I’ll find out.

Meet-Up

There is one other thing. A group I am a part of on FB is planning a meeting in Mt. Shasta, California in May. I have been following the preparations from the beginning. Yesterday I decided, out of the blue, that I should go. I told my husband about it and, strangely, he had no objections. When I communicated today with the contact about arranging my flight my heart chakra was blazing with energy. Even typing about it now makes my heart light up. I got thoroughly excited about going and my energy went sky high.

Then, in the afternoon, I began to doubt my decision about attending because I only know the people who will be there via the internet. I also began to panic over something very odd. I had this strange feeling that if I went I would not want to come home. Then an internal panic button went off and I got a strange split in two feeling. It was really odd and I almost thought I was about to go OOB right then and there.

After this happened the heart energy ceased – well up until now anyway. I am wondering if this is any indicator of what it is that I am not willing to know/accept. Part of me thinks it is and when I try to consider it, the fear returns. All I want to do is cuss a million cuss words just considering that possibility.

 

 

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Adviser Adzekiel and the Requiem Room

I asked to project again but knew that a break was needed. My body needed rest as did my mind. So no projections last night.

Adviser Adzekiel 

I was awakened several times last night from children. Each time I had that lovely drowsy feeling that lulls one back into sleep. However, I also have knowing that I had been busy in my sleep and tried to retrieve my dreams as proof. This is when one of my guides interrupted, telling me, “Remember not your dreams but what is behind them.”

During one of my early morning wakings, after just having dream in which I had been at a university receiving my test results, I awoke and once again attempted to retrieve my dreams. I felt the presence of my guide and as soon as I would attempt a retrieval the dream would vanish and the feeling with it. It was very odd but not an unfamiliar experience.

This guide remained ever present and quite big, though not intrusive. His energy was very gentle and not at all dominant. It was as if he were a passive observer but I know better than that. At one point I asked him who he was and he gave me the name, “Adzekiel”. I was not familiar with the name and asked it to be repeated because I didn’t think the “d” should be there. However, that is the name and it was confirmed.

He showed me who he was visually and I was surprised to see a long flowing, white robe. Around his neck he wore a golden sash. I was immediately reminded of an OBE where I met up with several individuals who appeared similar. I could not make out his face but I saw dark hair. I asked where his black robe was because I remembered black. He said, “I can wear black if you like, but I usually wear white.” I got the feeling this is because of his role. I asked if he always appeared male. He said, “We can appear however we choose.” I asked him why he chose male. He answered, “Because you prefer it.” I then asked, “What do you prefer to look like?” Then I saw his image change and his hair became long and blonde and he was very obviously female. I questioned this and he said, “We [all of us] are both male and female.” I knew this already but still it was nice to hear.

I asked what his role is. “Are you on my Council?” He said, “I am part of your ‘Team’ – as you call it.” Trying to figure out exactly what he did and why he was wearing a different color, I asked more questions. In the end it was determined that he was more of an adviser to me than my guides in black. Those in black are involved in my life plan on a daily basis while he is called in at certain times when advisement is needed. He also stated he was an adviser to many others, others not just of my group. He told me, “You will find my name is used by others [channels].” I got the feeling he was a member of the Council, but he avoided this term and used another, which I cannot recall now.

Requiem Room

In my dream I had been in a library-like setting. It had wood walls with tall bookshelves and comfortable seating. I was with a small group of individuals and we were discussing our test results and our classes. The environment and discussion reminded me very much of a university. I had successfully passed my final test for “History” and was progressing to the next class. There was a feeling of relief on my part – like I no longer had to worry about some past pattern repeating. A male student who was part of my group did not receive such great news. I saw his test returned to him with marks indicating areas that needed improvement. I felt very sorry for him and knew he would remain in his class for a while longer.

I asked where we had been and was told it was of no consequence. However, I heard the word, “Requiem” pop into my head straight away and knew we had been in the Requiem Room. I could not understand why the term requiem was being used to describe the room. In my mind it was a piece of music. However, I found that it’s Latin origins indicate that it means “Rest”. This makes perfect sense and is so much better than being told we were in the “Rest Room”. lol 😉

New Level

Adzekiel announced to me that I was moving to “the next level”, whatever that means. As you know, I have heard this before. I move to another level often it seems. The “briefing” I received after this announcement came in the form of me “feeling” the information and interpreting that feeling with my mind.

My dream was first to be “felt” out. I was again instructed to not focus on the dream but to Remember what was behind the dream. It was easier than I realized and I knew what my “Test” was and why I passed it. Apparently, the feelings and urges I had pertaining to finances and needing a job were part of this test. I had an overwhelming knowingness that these feelings were old patterns being released, some mine and some the “groups” (world’s). Also, my actions were being observed. Would I resist and ignore my “instructions”? Or would I give into them? I did resist, somewhat, but ultimately I was open to finding work and did search many times for it. However, none ever felt right. So this was the test that I passed.

With this understanding I felt something had shifted and I no longer needed to find work. My husband would have advances in his work (he has been very unhappy) and my focus could remain on my spiritual journey. Yay!! Writing is the focus and I have been asked if I would be open to writing a book. I am, since I have already written one, but no further instructions have been given. There was a nudge from Adzekiel at this time to proceed with creating a new blog outlining my walk-in experiences. I felt this nudge strongly and was told this would be “foundation work”. He told me, “There will be many walk-ins”. I have little time – less than 7 months – for the plan is for great change is to happen around my 40th birthday and they pertain to the walk-in. Woah.

I knew the male class member in my dream had not been completely successful. I felt he was close to me but not “family” and learned quickly that my classmates and I were not part of the same soul family. There were two men and three woman, including me, in our small class. Classes are organized and dispersed often and members are picked based upon the similarity of need. My soul family may or may not be included depending on their need/level. Interesting!

 

 

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OBE: Good Vibrations

Since I was told I would soon be experiencing another upgrade soon, I asked if I could astral project. I got the go-ahead and so requested again prior to sleep.

Lucid Dream: Uncomfortable Sexual Situation

I found myself inside a dorm room with several other young people. For some reason we were all in one bed together. A young woman with brown hair was entertaining two boys. She was very sexually promiscuous and proceeded to have sex with one boy while the other watched. I was in bed with them with my back turned trying to ignore it all and thinking, “Is she really? Are they really?” This brought me into semi-lucidity.

I finally had enough when I felt something wet on my leg. Disgusted I got out and retreated to the bathroom where I found a bed inside one of the stalls. I tried to lay down and rest there but felt I needed to return to the dorm room.

When I came back out I was inside a large common area and people were everywhere with bags and boxes in their hands. Moving. I saw a young woman who was getting cords and wires together to set up her laptop. She inquired if I was ready. When I saw her I got a very uncomfortable feeling and began to cry. I said, “No, I don’t want to!” With my upset I felt my lucidity increase and the scene shifted.

OBE: Good Vibrations

Then I was drifting in the in-between receiving information about the future plans of Earth. At the time it was like a huge screen was in front of me and it had all sorts of data and graphs on it. The main parts I recall are the maps of various places on Earth. They had horizontal lines of different colors over the top of them. Each line had words inside with a set goal. It was very political but I can’t remember anything that was written and it really bothers me because I know it is important!

Then I was looking at a demographic map of the U.S. The areas where the population was low were marked as areas that needed attention. The goal was to move people to these places. This I didn’t understand but I didn’t question. These desolate areas were important but I am not sure how. I specifically recall thinking these areas would include the states of North and South Dakota, Montana, Wyoming, Idaho and parts of Utah. I did not consider any Midwestern states which surprises me.

Then I was hearing a discussion about travelers who were to visit these low population areas. I heard about a prophet who was very ancient and often traveled to these places to visit certain people.

Then I was observing a field. It reminded me of the fields in Montana – sage brush and grass everywhere. In front of me were three identical midgets. They had brown hair and short beards. I knew they were the Prophet I had just heard about. They had traveled a very long way to be here and I knew they were important so I was very curious about them.

They spoke to a man who was standing in the field. I never actually saw him, though, just felt he was there. When these little men spoke they spoke as if they were one person. One would start talking and the next would pick up in the middle of the sentence and then the third would pick up where the other left off. It continued like this. Not one of them ever finished a sentence without the others. I don’t remember what they said, though.

This is when I entered the scene with full lucidity. I was OOB before but not actually in any specific space. At this point it was like I was shifted into the scene.

The midgets vanished. The unseen man vanished. I was laying horizontally on a hard surface. I could see the sagebrush field in my peripheral vision. My attention was completely focused on the night sky above me. There were millions of stars and my vision was so completely clear that I was in awe while also a bit confused as to what was going on.

I felt the three men around me then but they were not men any longer. I could not see them but I felt them. One stood at my feet and one was on my left and the other on my right at around my stomach area.

I felt a pressure in my root chakra and then an intense vibration. It shot up through the root chakra along my spine and spread out. These vibrations were not like any I have ever experienced while OOB or receiving K energy. It literally felt like someone had put one of those vibrating massagers inside me or a very, very, very long dildo. lol

Startled, my first thought was that these Beings were trying to sexually stimulate me. I tensed up, anticipating that my body would respond. However, I felt absolutely no sexual response from my body at all. I also felt that I needed to not focus on my physical body and to just allow the vibrations to continue.

That is when I felt (was told?) to focus on “the light”. Prior to this I had not seen any light, yet there, high in the night sky, was a very large, almost moon-sized, perfectly white light. It was just off to the right and I focused on it as instructed. What is weird is that I perceived there was another light shining behind me and my conscious mind imagined it to be a street light. It also felt like the light behind me and the light in the sky were one and the same.

The vibrations continued for some time. I felt them from my root chakra through my 2nd chakra and there was a rod-shaped central area they seemed to emanate from. The vibrations spread all the way through my hips and lower abdomen and even down my thighs some. I knew that when the light in the sky disappeared that the vibrations would stop.

The light disappeared and the vibrations stopped.

Then it was over as suddenly as it started and I was on my hands and knees staring out across a sagebrush field. It was dark outside and the stars shown so brightly and were so absolutely clear that I was once again in awe. It reminded me of a night long ago when I slept under the stars in the mountains of Montana – so intensely beautiful.

I looked around and said aloud to my guides, “What do I do now?”

I woke up almost immediately afterward.  The Beings were still with me. I will write about what happened next in the next post.

 

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Upgrade Approaching

It’s been an odd day.

First, something felt off this morning and it lasted until about noon. I had a feeling in my gut that was not going away. Since I had the urge to look for a job, I searched online and it only made the feeling in my gut turn into an anxiety in my heart chakra. When I finally stopped the job search all off feelings vanished as if they were never there to begin with.

Later, during my youngest’s nap, I took some time alone outside and just stared up at the cloudless sky. I had been having trouble thinking all day and so I had no thoughts. My mind was just blank. That’s when one of my guides announced to me, “There will be an upgrade soon. We have been preparing you. It will be intense.” Funny enough, I didn’t bat an eye. I am so use to these kinds of announcements that I just wanted to know when. The answer was predictable: “Soon.” My feeling was that it was likely to hit me in the middle of the night. I said, “I can’t handle anymore crazy emotional up’s and down’s.” His response to that was, “You need to be clear.” Okay. So that likely means I need to have some tissue on hand. Or maybe it will be one of those intense crown chakra blasts this time? Who knows. I will just wait and see.

After that, I went to get the mail with my daughter. A neighbor was there getting hers as well and I instantly recognized her. She had lost her husband right before Christmas and talked to me in-depth one day about her struggle to make it through the holidays. I almost asked her how she was but hesitated because my daughter was there with me and I knew the woman’s deceased husband was right there and wanting to pass on a message. He followed me home telling me how he wanted to tell his wife he was with their cat and giving me the name “Grace”. I felt bad but at the same time I had no idea how I would have approached the subject with my neighbor.

As I prepared my bath just a while ago I asked about the coming upgrade. Was everyone going to experience this? I was told that the upgrades will not hit everyone at the same time nor in the same way. I was shown that I am cycling through them. Each one will clear something new, taking off more and more layers. It will cycle through pretty fast I am told, much faster than I have previously experienced (meaning weeks pass rather than months I guess?).

I must say that I’m not looking forward to this. Based upon my most recent emotional outpouring followed by awful intestinal flu, I am not sure I can take much more. Oh wait, that was the “preparation”…. Hmmm Well, at least they told me the upgrade is coming and it will be “intense”. I am trying to remember what happened the last time they used the word intense. I can’t remember. Not surprised being my brain is not working.

 

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Lucid to OBE: Great Blizzard

I was awakened at 3am by crying children. My youngest was screaming and my middle son was upset. My husband was cleaning up puke. My middle son had gotten sick and vomited all over the place. Looks like my stomach bug is continuing its progression through the family.

After tending to my youngest for about an hour, I returned to sleep. I knew I would go OOB.

Lucid to OBE: Great Blizzard

I became aware of dreaming while in a scene that resembled a hallway. I was talking to a woman who was leaving her husband, a much older man than she. She was upset and he was calling for her from inside their bedroom.

I went inside to talk to her husband. He was laying in a huge waterbed and asking for her. I told him she would not come and then commented on his huge waterbed. He was a gross old man in some respects and got sexual with me. I remember he grabbed me and pulled me toward his crotch. He was naked and his penis exposed. I got completely grossed out and pulled away.

Then I was in the main hallway again and had full lucidity. The minute I realized I was dreaming, I began to receive a barrage of images. They appeared not in my mind but right in front of me as if they were playing out. I saw image after image of newscasts discussing a “great blizzard” that was hitting the U.S. from the south as far as Texas all the way north to New York and the Great Lakes region. I remember hearing the newscasts as well. People were stranded and dying. There was no power. The roads were impassible. There was destruction from flooding. There were calls for help but no one could answer or it was delayed.

The images just kept coming and I pleaded to my guide, “I don’t wanna see anymore” and I began to pull myself out of the projection. I was stopped. I felt him pull my energy back. “You need to see this.” I began to cry from the intensity of the scenes. The last one that I saw was from Texas. The snow was sparse but there had been an ice storm. I knew it was North Texas – Dallas or somewhere close to there. I saw a huge semi-truck on its side and heard, “multiple fatalities”.

Finally the scenes stopped and I saw my guide standing in front of me, clear as day. My upset was gone immediately and I said to him, “I know you!” He looked me straight in the eye and said, “Yes you do.” Then he walked around me and I kept staring at him. He was so perfectly clear and real and I wondered if I would go back to my body as I was so aware that I felt completely awake.

I asked him, “Where do I know you from? What is your name?” He said, “You know me from Heaven. My name is Jeb, Jeb Christianson.” I began laughing while saying, “Heaven??” Then I wondered about his name and he sent back an entire address, but all I recall now is “Burnet Road”. I figured he was joking around with me. I recognized him from a previous OBE and he had been playful then, so it made sense.

Then he was outright yelling. His voice was so loud it startled me and I thought for sure it would push me back into my body. Yet I remained. He yelled, “Do you think just because I show you scenes of disaster that it means it’s the end of the world!?? I never said it was the end of the world!!” This caught me so off guard that if I had been in my body I would have stopped breathing. Why was he yelling at me? He sent back, “Because you aren’t listening!!!!!” Woah.

I woke up with a start and felt him still close. “Why were you yelling at me?” He said back, “You don’t listen. This [life] is your best chance!” With that I understood that he was referring to getting things done – progressing spiritually – meeting my goals.

To say the least I felt very repentant but not entirely sure why. I have never had a guide yell at me like that and he continued to act serious afterward. I also find it curious how he was able to prevent me from going back to my body. I literally felt him pull my energy and keep it OOB. I didn’t know they could do that!

 

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Memory: Twisted Love

I had a memory resurface from last night.

In the memory, I am alone with a man. I do not know him personally here in the physical but the feeling was that we have been “forever together”. I can’t see what he looks like in my memory. There is only the silhouette of a man who is taller than me. I remember dark hair, I think, but this is also hard to recall. When I try to remember all I see is a dark blur where his face should be. 😦

I ran to him, excited and out of breath over something I had just learned. I remember thinking how dense I have been to not have realized it sooner. I said a whole string of things to him that made perfect sense to me, but now I can’t remember even one of the words I said. There only remains a feeling. Ultimately, though, the lesson I learned was recognizing where jealousy comes from and why I had been so horribly jealous when it concerned him.

At the time, I remember that it was the feeling or vibration of jealousy that caused me to have the “ah-ha” moment. I recognized the jealousy vibration was the same as the love vibration. The source was the same. The difference was that jealousy is love twisted by fear – fear of loss of love. The jealousy is equally proportionate to the love. So, if one loves at the highest intensity, then the jealousy felt would reverberate back at an equal intensity. It is the same with other “negative” emotions. They all originate as love but fear twists them into something altogether different.

That is the end of the memory. I remembered it while shopping at the grocery store with my kids. It was just there and I thought it odd that it would come to me at such a mundane life moment.

After processing the memory I knew the memory was a reflection of a part of myself I avoid in the physical because of the intensity of the emotion of jealousy. I have felt it in this lifetime once and I never want to revisit it. I turned into some kind of obsessed idiot and did not like myself at all. Now that particular relationship was completely of the lower chakras. I did not love the man, I lusted after him. We were drawn together like magnets, though, and it was a very uncomfortable experience when we were apart – for both of us. I told Steven afterwards, “I don’t want to ever do that again. It’s not worth it.”  I suspect this lesson was not completely learned – that it was a “warm-up” of sorts. So the memory seemed to be a reminder that my green-eyed alter-ego still lurks in the shadows.

There was something else I brought back with that memory. I realized this jealousy issue is part of why I am not ready for an intense, heart-connected relationship. Yet there was also a feeling that I am being prepared for just that.