Category Archives: mediumship

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More Spirit Communication

Active night.

First, I dreamed that I was getting a divorce. My husband was angry and went to the freezer (cold emotion, preservation) and started pulling out various meats (achievement, choice, control) leaving them to thaw and ruin. I remember seeing some packages of meat out and him saying something indicating he left them out on purpose. I grabbed some meats that were already thawed. One was a huge package of hotdog wieners (sexual urges) and another was a big package of individual whole chickens (material well being, success). I told him I would just cook the meat rather than let it go to waste. I picked up the hotdogs and decided against cooking them since, well, they’re hotdogs and they aren’t healthy. So, I selected the chicken and told him I would cook them all. The chicken was too small to actually be chicken, though. It looked more like Cornish game hens.

Audible Conversation

I woke several times early in the morning and eventually settled back to try and get some sleep. My mind was quite active with thoughts about various things. My sister’s birthday is coming up and I was trying to figure out what to give her for her birthday. I was thinking about getting her a card and mailing it to her and want to include a gift card or something in it. I never decided what gift card or how much, though. My thoughts seemed to drift at this time and I know I was in the in-between – not quite awake but not fully asleep either.

Somehow I found myself in a conversation about the drug trade. Most likely it came about because of my concerns about my sister’s drug habit. At first it seemed like I was the one talking (telepathically) to someone else. I noticed the thoughts/words as they moved from me to the other person. If I had been vocalizing my thoughts it would be as if someone else were speaking using my voice. The thoughts coming through weren’t mine. Yet I was not protesting or stopping the communication. It seemed completely normal.

At one point I was saying, “When we enter a new area, we send a fox into the neighborhood….” A loud, male voice interrupted, coming from my left and said, “WOLF” as soon as the word “fox” was said. It was audible, as if the man was standing right next to me, and so spooked me momentarily.This is when I realized I wasn’t speaking at all, it was someone else to my right. I knew the rest of what was being said – “When we enter a new area, we send a fox (wolf) into the neighborhood. We claim the territory as our own and then move on to the next neighborhood.” With these words were images and Knowing. It was as if I had done what was being spoken – gone into a neighborhood and “taken it over” in whatever way necessary. The feeling was pride mixed with a bit of urgency.

I tried to ignore the conversation. So what if I was in the middle of it, I wanted to sleep. The conversation continued only this time the words didn’t seem to come through me and the voice on my right was audible as if someone was right beside me. The tone, pitch and loudness were apparent. I listened for a while but much of the words are lost to memory now because, well, he said quite a bit. He was talking to the other man as if explaining himself. I rarely heard the man on my left, but when I did it was always louder and more gruff. 

The man on my right was talking to the man on my left about his health and arguing that he ate healthy, describing his lifestyle. In that moment I saw someone who had a large belly, a belly that I associate with those who like to drink beer (beer belly). I didn’t see his face. The info was coming in too fast, coming across me as if a stream of energy that I was able to reach into and grab pieces of info.

I was once again pulled out of my reverie by the loud, gruff voice on my left. He said two words, “Warrant” and “Christian”. They seemed to be related to what the man on my right was saying. If I had to guess, the man on my right had a warrant which may have been what actually led to his demise, not his eating habits. 

Finally, tired of the back and forth with me in the middle, I told the man on my right, “Can you please go away?” I got from him a bit of surprise and questioning and I said, “I’m trying to sleep.” It got quiet then and I tried to go back to sleep but called in my guidance for assistance telling them, “I just want to sleep.” I heard back, “But you’ve been asking for this.” This statement, though not entirely true, caught my interest. Had I ask for this? 

Honestly, I might have but a very long time ago, back when I was a practicing medium and struggled to hear complete sentences from Spirit. I recently spoke to my brother about it because he had a session with a medium who was unable to give him messages from our father. I explained that it is difficult, acting as an intermediary between a living person and a dead person. It is difficult to receive full sentences without the conscious mind getting in the way. I told him about how our father visited me via OBE, how real everything was, and explained that was the best way to get full communication, voice and all. I shared with him times when Spirit had come to me when I was awake and how it always scared the you-know-what out of me. It hasn’t been often because I tell them to come to me in the in-between where my fear doesn’t take over like it does when I’m awake.

But I don’t recall wishing to have the experience, not exactly. I do recall missing OBEs and, yes, the very kind of experience I just had because they are cool and unusual. Hmmmm.

I finally just asked, “What’s your name?” The man on my right said, “I already told you.” Note: This communication was not audible but more like I am use to. It’s came through as if my own complete thought. Confused, I tried to recall any names. This is when I remembered “Warrant” and “Christian”. I thought back, “Oh. Christian.” If I make a sentence out of those two words, I think the other man said, “You had a warrant, Christian.” lol 

He left and I lay in bed pondering everything until I finally got up because I surely wasn’t going back to sleep!

Other Incidents

Not long ago (Nov 10th)  my son had a sleep paralysis episode and a very active night. He got up to go to the restroom and heard an audible, male voice say to him, “Hey! Don’t come in here.” It spooked him but he said he wasn’t afraid.

Just a couple of nights ago my youngest son came into my room and sat on the bed. Not long after he said to me in surprise, “Mom! Someone just said hello to me!” I laughed but didn’t inquire into the experience. This morning I asked him about it. Did you hear it audibly? He said, “Yes! It was a woman!” 

My older son has had two incidences now where he has been freaked out by, “sparkles and smoke in the air” over his head. The first one had him so scared he was in tears because it was following him around our living room. I reassured him that it was harmless and told him to tell it to go away. He immediately relaxed. It happened again, though, this time outside. He said his friends saw it, too, which made him feel better (less crazy). When I asked him to describe what he saw inside and outside, he said inside it was “sparkly gold and smoke” and outside was “the same but with black”. He said he has seen it outside more than inside.

What Gives?

So what gives? IDK and am really not too concerned. Some might be freaked out to think that there is more than one Spirit lingering around their home “spying” on them. Trust me, they are and it is nothing to be worried about. Nothing is private. I realized this many years ago when I first opened to my gift of mediumship. They.are.everywhere. LOL

It is rare that I hear them audibly but I’ve experienced it enough now (both when awake and in the in-between) to have very little reaction to it at all. Usually I just get annoyed. Like, come on! People gotta sleep here in the waking world! I’ve also had the experience of feeling “taken over” (trance mediumship) enough times now not to be alarmed, though it is very weird and not my preference. This morning was only the second time and I felt no energetic or physical side-effects like the first time.

If these are indicators that I could potentially be returning to mediumship, I am game, especially if I can hear Spirit audibly. How exciting! I have played this game enough to 1. not be afraid, 2. know I am in control and can turn it off/on, and 3. recognize the value in it.

Oh, and if you know someone named Christian who had a beer belly and died as a result of being involved in the drug trade (not his unhealthy diet), then he’s still arguing with his male friend about why his life came to an end. My guess is he got into it with the cops but I didn’t ask for specifics.

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A Spark

Another mediumship experience to share.

Target

I had to venture into Target again despite swearing I would stay away. Many of the big stores are going to pure self-checkout. They have few actual cashiers and I hate self-checkout. My favorite Target is now remodeled and no matter what time of day I visit there are way more people in there than I would like. It is just crowded now. 

I did my shopping singing a little song to myself to make myself feel better about all the sleep-walking people around me. When I got to the cashier line there were two cashiers to pick from (rare). I picked the lady I am familiar with. She always recognizes me and smiles, genuinely happy to see me. 

As usual we chatted as she checked me out. She’s older, maybe 70, and has similar views to my own about the city we live in and the changes going on around us. This time she told me she had been out a couple of days. When I asked why, she said she had been sick. Her son died on Labor Day and she has been struggling. She said she was the one who discovered his body. She went on to say she has been emptying his apartment in a rush to avoid paying another month’s rent and the landlord was nice enough to release them from paying for breaking the lease. She also relayed to me that she has his dog which offers her some comfort. Ultimately, her stomach was giving her problems so she had to take time off from work. I told her the body will force us to heal if we don’t listen to it. She agreed.

On my way out of the store I began to feel the emotion and by the time I was in the parking lot I was crying. Inside my car I sobbed. The woman was not showing any heightened emotion, so I doubt I was picking up on her emotion, but maybe. My immediate thought was that her son was close, maybe even following me out of the store.

I wanted to do something to help her, to show her I cared. I thought of taking her a card the next time I visited the store, maybe slipping a $100 bill inside. “Money can’t help her” was my immediate thought. No one should have to experience the loss of their child. 

Sometime in the night I awoke to use the restroom. My mind was still fuzzy with dreams. As I entered the bathroom I received a very vivid image of people standing in my periphery. The image was tunnel-like and back lit. There was one person at the front – a man who was somewhat short and round. There were two others behind him, only shadows in my memory now. I immediately knew he was the woman’s son. I acknowledged the man briefly, only partially conscious of the dialogue. The name “John” was relayed and as I returned to bed I worried I would not get to sleep because of his presence. As soon as I had the thought he retreated. Relieved, I thanked him and returned to sleep. 

All I am left with now are remnants of our conversation. His message was only that he was concerned about his mom and wanted her to know he was okay. The top message I received from Spirit is that they are not gone, just in another place – a much better place. I remember wondering how I could help. The woman didn’t ask me to connect. It was inappropriate to just tell her, “I’m a medium”. I could potentially write a note to her in the card that did not give away that I was directly communicating with her son. I remember that he told me about a song, one that was linked to him in life. I didn’t get details of the song. I was also reminded of how, when I first became aware of my gifts, I passed on messages all the time without anyone ever knowing I was directly communicating with Spirit. Perhaps I did already when I told the lady that I am sure her son is happy to know his dog is with her. Saying that made the woman smile. Perhaps it gave her a moment of relief? I hope so.

Mediumship

One of the most difficult parts of mediumship for me is the emotion. If the connection is strong I am usually overwhelmed to the point of tears. When giving a reading I don’t want to be a snotty, teary mess. I can’t speak and I need to in order to pass on the messages. I will get extremely hot as the emotion hits me. Sometimes I will actually feel how the person passed from this life – their physical body symptoms. Often I cannot control the violent shivers I experience from all the energy going through me. 

I don’t have to be giving a reading to have these “symptoms” of mediumship. In fact, I think most of the time I am picking up information even though I work very hard to block it. 

Lately I have been feeling extremely numb in general, so when the emotion hit me in the parking lot yesterday it was like night and day. When considering the memory of that experience I remember hearing that it is okay to feel and to be overwhelmed (cry uncontrollably). I know I have been conditioned not to cry – it means I’m “weak/vulnerable”. I also know from my K experiences that being open and vulnerable is a good thing.

As for why all this is happening now, I suppose it is inevitable. In fact, it might be the perfect storm for such gifts to resurface. 

A long time ago now I was wide-open and didn’t mind being that way. When an opportunity presented itself to pass on a message I took it. I learned some hard lessons, though. Most people are not open to receiving. Even now, with mediumship on T.V. and more people embracing it, there is resistance and skepticism. I think the biggest misconception is that a medium is able to get a crystal clear picture of their loved ones(s) and experiences them like a person in the physical world. That is not my experience and it is difficult, sometimes impossible, to get the names and other specifics requested. I’ve had people yell (and curse) at me and their loved ones in Spirit in frustration at not getting the answers they desire. Sigh.

For now it may only be that my gift of mediumship is serving to reconnect me with myself, that part of me that feels deeply and wants only to help ease the suffering of this world. My Light can spark the Light within others.