Tag Archives: blogging

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The Consciousness Ripple Effect

I am seeing something that should have been obvious to me but up until today was not. Consciousness is a ripple effect. It moves out from the center and touches all experiencers/experiences, increasing them all to the same degree.

I have so many thoughts pouring through me right now but I can’t get out of my mind this idea. I remember all my OBEs and the crazy child personality that often comes with them. I remember how I rarely stay in the moment in my OBEs, but flit from here to there. I recall how I struggle with myself and against myself while OOB, only recently letting go and surrendering, allowing myself to be taken off by the wind even. I recall how my vision is often a problem, as is my hearing.

I am the same in waking life as I am in my OBEs. I often am on autopilot. I often fight with myself. The world is mostly gray and dismal with sparks of color here and there. I also don’t listen too well.

Yet today I saw that as I increase consciousness in this experience so will it increase in the others. I can see that this experience is but one in a million or more experiences I am having all together at the same time. My consciousness can be with any one of them at any time it chooses. Yet it will not be more in one than it is in another.

Imagine being fully conscious and aware in any one of your experiences at any time. Imagine “waking up” all at once to all of them, at once.

Mind blowing.

I also recall setting the intention recently to be more present in the moment. This is for waking life. I sense that my experience could be more clear, more real than it has been. I want that and I am looking for it throughout my days, constantly reminding myself to be “present here” and pulling my thoughts away from the past or the future.

I am happier because of it.

We must master the present experience in order to master all experience.

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Do You Feel It?

I awoke this morning to the most fantastic, happy feeling I have ever felt upon waking. My guide was right there with me and I could not go back to sleep. Again. My energy has been high the past few days but this is beyond a normal happy feeling.

The feeling reminds me very much of how I feel after having really good sex. 😀 It is an “afterglow” feeling but it is much better than any afterglow I have ever had. I don’t recall doing anything unusual in dreamland either – no astral sex, no kundalini energy, nothing out of the ordinary.

Perhaps if I look into my dreams I will find the source of this fantastic, sublime, blow your mind feeling?

Asking Forgiveness

I had a really detailed dream where I met up with an old classmate. We were in a bar in Montana just chatting and talking. I had a semi-lucid moment where I realized who it was I was talking to and so told him, “You know when we were in 7th grade and I broke up with you the way I did? That was wrong of me and I’m sorry. I felt pressured to do it and I really felt bad about it. Still do”. He smiled and said, “No problem. I understand”.

We then spent time catching up on each others lives, him talking about his wife and introducing me to her.

Then someone stole my car out of the parking lot and there was a side-dream about that and me getting it back. It was a nice sports car. I think it was black.

That was when I awoke feeling so wonderful and my guide was there talking to me. I can’t remember everything we talked about now but he was trying to communicate something important to me, encouraging me to go into the in-between. Every time a message would start coming through I would become too aware and miss most of it, though. I was just too happy and excited.

Taking the Fence Down

In one of the in-between times I recall talking with my guide while standing in a green yard. He asked me, “Do you want to keep the fence up?” I said cheerfully, “No. Take it down”.

I woke up and knew this was important but I was not sure how. I think the fence symbolizes my resistance to something, perhaps the changes I have been going through. Me taking it down suggests I am open to allowing in more of this energy and change.

Hearing From the Heart

I also recall being told this by my guide:

“You will hear me differently. Soon.”

“What does that mean?”

“You will hear me from the heart”.

I didn’t and still don’t quite understand. Perhaps it is just feeling him and not so much hearing him.

I Finished!

Another in-between message I received was seeing and hearing my daughter as she jumped up and down. She yelled, “I finished! I finished!”

I woke up knowing I had finished something. I felt very proud.

You Can Project

I told my guide I wanted to leave my body. He told me I was “blue” indicating my energy was high enough to astral.

I tossed and turned for some time, not able to settle the amazing, excited energy I felt.

I finally laid on my back long enough to feel the vibrations indicative of astral. I was fully conscious and surprised at how intense the vibrations were.

My guide said, “You can project now”, as if he wanted me to just get up out of my body.

I didn’t know if I could do that so asked, “How?”

He told me to relax into the vibrations. I tried but relaxation was not forthcoming. Again, I was too happy and excited and you know what? I didn’t mind not going OOB. I was fine right here in the physical.

The energy intensified around my head like a helmet. I also felt energy in my second chakra as well as in the other chakras. It tickled and was pleasant.

Continued Energy Helmet

I have had the energy helmet over my entire head all day. As I drove my son to his doctor appointment it was intense and I felt very floaty as I traveled the highway. I actually felt similar to how I feel in astral and I felt a juxtaposition occur. I feel like I am here and there at the same time, riding a wave right through the middle of two worlds and able to navigate either one at any time. Weird!

I was asked if I wanted it to stop and I told my guide “No”. I knew the worry was all me and the feeling was completely controllable. Just like in astral.

The energy continues even now and the amazing feeling is still with me.

I have just been all smiles today. Ear to ear.

Do you feel it?

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The Next Three Weeks: What to Expect

As the full moon approaches the energy seems to be building and building. I feel about ready to explode with energy! Yesterday I spent most of my day outside or exercising in an attempt to control the energy. Though I ended up feeling physically exhausted by day’s end, I did not sleep well. I tossed and turned most of the night and woke up four or five times. Each time I woke up from a vivid dream. All this despite taking Benadryl to help me sleep.

Today I can still feel the energy and I know it is only going to keep on rising. On a personal level this doesn’t really concern me since I seem to be better able to handle the energy increases than I use to. However, I know that with such increases others are not so good at adjusting and channeling the excess energy.

I have been forewarned that today there will be a “spike” at around 2pm CST. I am ready!

I can’t help but think about the message I received not long ago about a period of three weeks starting around the time of the full moon (coming up this Saturday). What do the upcoming changes mean for those still struggling with the Shift?

What to Expect

I am told that those who are in the beginning stages of the Shift, both conscious and unconscious of it, will be overwhelmed by the waves of energy soon to come. Some will be downright plowed over by it. This can result in flu-like symptoms – body aches and pains, headaches, fatigue, digestive problems, joint pain, stiffness, and lack of motivation to name a few. Mentally there will be some who just cannot handle the mental fog that descends down upon them seemingly from out of nowhere. They will be more negative – snapping at people and just being downright nasty at times.

Those who have progressed to the middle and later stages of the Shift may not notice much. It all depends on what chakra centers are being purged and aligned for them. Those working on the heart may find themselves overly emotionally charged both positive and negative. They also may have higher incidences of anxiety and heart palpitations. Those working on the throat chakra may be more or less talkative, have difficulties swallowing and/or have symptoms in the throat area that come on suddenly and then disappear just as suddenly.

Those working on the third-eye will sense the energy of others which could, in turn, cause them to mistakenly assume the emotions they are feeling are their own. They may pick up a myriad of emotions from others and this can be a challenge, especially if they are around people struggling with adjustment. For those new to this ultra-sensitivity to others emotions (empathy) it is a good idea to practice self-protection by grounding and protecting, using a crystal or just avoiding negative people.

Finally, those working on the crown chakra can expect physical symptoms such as skin rashes and sensitivity, insomnia, and stomach upset. Some will have more incidences of communication with their Higher Self and/or knowingness, intensely vivid dreams and even astral travel or trance states.

This website has a great list of the chakras and the body systems they affect. If you are struggling regularly with a specific physical or emotional issue you can look for it on this site and it will tell you which chakras it relates to. Then you will know what chakra(s) you are currently clearing and aligning.

I also want to remind you that chakra clearing does not always happen in a recognizable sequence. So, you may be experiencing multiple chakras clearing at once and in no particular order. I have found in my own experience, however, that the lower four chakras tend to clear prior to the three higher ones.

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Orphans at School

Prior to my unexpected OBE this morning, I had a very vivid dream.

Orphan at School

I was both the dreamer and the observer in this dream.

I watched as a small, blonde toddler was dropped off at an orphanage. She looked like a little baby doll with golden ringlets and cherub cheeks. She was scared and a group of older ladies ushered her into the building. Along the way she saw other little boys and girls her age and knew they had all been dropped at the orphanage.

There was a tall man and other adults who oversaw the orphanage. I remember that an older lady who looked like the fairy God Mother from Cinderella was talking with me and helping me adjust. I was asking her questions and I remember she told me that each of the new children got an entire roasted chicken to eat. She gave me mine and I took it. Later, I asked for something different to eat and she told me, “You will get chicken for the first week while you are adjusting”. I said, “Oh, but I wanted turkey”.

At one point I was told by a man who was the leader of this orphanage that I was not in an orphanage but in a school. When he told me I suddenly realized he was right and with that I changed from the little girl into an adult. As we talked I recognized that I was not dropped off either, but that I was sent there along with others to learn. The feeling I got was that this was a school to teach us how to use our abilities.

Understanding hit me and I immediately began to practice my abilities with the teacher. We put stood in front of one another and reached out, placing our hands in front of each other. Then we both sent energy toward one another through our hands and soon began to lift off the floor. I shot up quickly and laughed.

Afterward I was laying side by side with a man I didn’t know on one side and my teacher on the other. I recall being instructed to get to know the man and so when I did he began to kiss me and the next thing I knew we were having astral sex. The teacher was there and I remember asking if he wanted to join but he declined. Strangely, I did not wake up from this experience and I remember very little of the actual sexual act (thankfully).

Afterward we were all three together and the man I had been with sexually began to sing. He had such a beautiful voice and I remember wanting to join him. I was hit suddenly with such emotion that it woke me up.

Interpretation

The fact that I was a child in this dream and going to an orphanage symbolizes my fear, specifically of being abandoned and/or alone. The chicken also symbolizes fear. Based upon how the dream made me feel, I believe my guide was trying to get me to take the next step and we were discussing my fear of it. Later in the dream I must have taken that step because I “grew up” and began to practice my abilities.

Conversation with Guide

When I woke up I had tears in my eyes. I saw it was 5am and I was made because I had specifically asked to not have in-depth dreams that woke me up! Despite being upset, I recognized that I was being shown something but at the time I did not want to acknowledge it.

My guide began to ask me to listen, he wanted to tell me something. I told him, “Not now. I want to sleep!” But he kept bugging me and so I rolled over on my back and tried to listen. I fell into the in-between several times at t his point and kept waking up in the midst of receiving information.

I only remember a few things but one was that in the coming weeks there would be more negative things happening on Earth similar to the recent plane crash. More people were going to die. I did not want to hear about negative things and so told my guide this quite sternly. Another thing I remembered was being told that I needed to remember the things that made me the happiest in life – one of those is singing as was revealed in the dream. Finally, I recall seeing a map of the U.S. and instantly rejecting the message that came with it which was again about future weather-related disasters in the east and southeast. There were other brief beginnings of messages along with a feeling of urgency. I was in no mood to hear them, though and kept asking to sleep.

The last thing I remember was arguing with my guide in the in-between. That is when I realized I could exit my body and so that is exactly what I did.

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OBE: Going Home via the Spiritual Processing Hub

I became aware while in the in-between. My guide was trying to get me to listen to something he had to say and I had no interest. When I woke up in this state I immediately knew I had a choice – experience kundalini rising which would result in orgasmic sensations or have an OBE. I chose the latter.

Spiritual Processing Hub

There were no vibrations, just a knowing I could exit and that is exactly what I did.

I just got up out of my body and found my vision was compromised. I felt like a blind person!

I knew I was in the etheric as the energy was somewhat dense and sluggish. So I immediately went to my bedroom door and felt around for it. When I found it I stopped and set the intention to pop out on the other side. It didn’t work and so I ended up opening the door.

On the other side of the door I was met by a woman. I did not see her really, just felt her and saw her shadow similar to what one sees when the are seeing in the dark. I was pleased to have a companion and asked her, “What’s your name?”

She replied, “Trick”.

She took my hand and led me to the stairs and we began to descend.

I thought again about her name and asked, “What was your name again?”

She replied, “Treat”.

I said, “That is a strange name”. (I laugh now as her name was literally “Trick or Treat”)

We continued to descend flight after flight of stairs and I realized I was not in my home but somewhere else. My mood was very happy and there was a full feeling in my chest like excitement being contained.

When we got to the bottom of the stairs my vision began to open up and I could see her more clearly. She was a Hispanic woman with long, wavy black hair. She was taller than me and thin and very attractive.

She let go of my hand and began to depart. I called back to her, “Where am I?”

She said, “I don’t know”.

I looked up and saw her above me on the stairs looking down at me. She began to speak in Spanish. She said a whole sentence but all I recall now is “para mi trabajo”. I understood what she said to mean that all she knew was that her job was to take me to this place and now she was done.

Alone now, I looked around and my vision was bright and crisp. I was standing in a large hallway that reminded me of a conference building. In front of me were tall windows and a glass door leading into another room. I went toward it but paused as I noticed a man walking down the hall toward me. He was wearing a blue janitor’s uniform and holding a broom. He was Hispanic and looking right at me. I wondered what to do for a moment and then decided to go through the glass doors.

When I went inside there were people mingling about. I saw couples of individuals talking dressed in nice clothing with cups in their hands. I recognized that I had entered into a social gathering similar to a cocktail party.

A couple was right in front of me. The dark haired woman wearing a blue cocktail dress and holding a martini looked and then stared at me. Others in the room where also staring and I realized suddenly that my breasts were exposed. The woman in blue smiled as I pulled up my top and covered myself. Then everyone seemed to ignore me and go back to socializing.

universeI walked through the room and it opened up into this expansive area that reminded me of the inside of an airport. It had very high ceilings and was a bright, golden color. What was amazing to me was how many people were inside! There were thousands of them all coming and going! I observed that most were going to stand in long lines. The lines were all over the place. Some winding to the right and others going to the left.

I was in awe and so pleased as I walked amidst the crowds of happy, brightly dressed people. They were of all ages and races and most were adults. However, I saw a group of small children to my right in a sitting area. There was a large set of windows that led outside where there was a gigantic playground. I saw older women with the children. Some of the women had three or four and were holding babies and toddlers in their arms. I saw children happily playing on the playground and I had such joy in my heart when I saw them. I remembered my own childhood and felt the thrill of it rise up in my chest. I wanted to join them but felt I should not and so moved on.

I passed close by an older woman holding a toddler as I moved away. I then ran into a long, winding line of people and had to push my way through an opening. I said, “Excuse me” as I squeezed through and a tall, blonde man reached out with his hand and touched my side. I turned and he smiled at me as if he were saying, “Welcome”. I smiled back and continued on my way.

On the other side of the line I paused and turned to face the crowds of people. I looked down at my hands and they were clear without any glow and I could see my arms all the way up to my biceps. I jumped with glee because I was overcome with such a feeling of being Home and felt inside, “I made it!” I am not sure where this feeling came from but I was almost overwhelmed by it and there was a quiet thought that said, “Remember, emotional objectivity”.

I calmed a bit upon hearing this and then heard, “Do you feel the wind?” And suddenly I was distinctly aware that I felt so much, I felt completely and utterly ALIVE! The wind blew over my skin and I could feel the hairs on my arms and my skin tighten with goosebumps. I twirled around and spread my arms out like a child and spun and spun.

The wind picked up and my vision blacked out. I almost panicked but again just surrendered to it. I felt myself picked up by the wind and then I became the wind, blowing to a new place. I felt almost as if I dematerialized and though it was new and somewhat scary, I did not end up back in my body.

When I settled and felt whole again I opened my eyes but could not see. I was somewhere new and I felt a presence with me but could not see. I spoke to him, “Where am I now?”

I got no reply.

I felt around and felt to be in an enclosed place. As I felt around I kept asking where I was and got no reply.

Finally my vision came back and I saw that I was inside a vehicle that resembled my own SUV. All the seats were down and I was in the trunk, or so it seemed. In front of me I saw the windshield and outside were millions upon trillions of stars! I also felt to be moving, as if in a spaceship but it looked like my SUV.

I then said, “I’m flying through galaxies in outer space!” It was meant like a question but came out an exclamation.

My vision then blacked out and I felt myself come back to my body quite quickly. My heart was pounding and I had to take a few deep breathes to get it to calm. I knew instantly my guide had resorted to OBE to get me to listen. It worked and I was pleased with the message I got.

I knew also I had been taken to a spiritual hub; a place where people go after death to continue to their next destination. That is what all the lines were – people heading Home.

That is why I felt I had made it Home. I had.

Factors Influencing Projection

Lucidity scale: 9

Intent stated?: Yes

Time to bed: 9pm

Time to wake: 5am

Meditation?: No

Physical Exercise?: None

Mood: normal

Body: None

Tiredness: Low

Number of wakings: 2

Technique?: WBTB

Sleeping position: Back

Supplements: Multivitamin, Natural Calm 400mg, Sleepy Time Extra Tea, Biotin 1000mg, Vitamin E 400mg, Calcium 500mg, Vitamin D 350mg, Bendadryl 25mg

Essential Oils: none

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Tending House

My sleep is being interrupted again and this time I cannot return to sleep. My dreams are very involved and near lucid, making it difficult for me: 1. to forget and 2. to get a good rest.

Runaway Truck

I recall watching from above, as if viewing a movie, as a green garbage truck drove itself down a road. It then changed its mind and turned around. It did this again and again running into things in the process. I recall having a discussion with a police officer from a large city about this disturbance at the time. The feeling was that I was overseeing this small town and was being evaluated by my supervisor.

Me and my supervisor then hovered over continents of green. I had a feeling of being a traveler at this time and reviewing past travels. I do not remember all that was said but there was a mini-story in which I was with a group deciding where to go next.

I then was on land in a field of green watching my superior talking to an old woman. The old lady had Alzheimer’s and I recognized she had been the truck from before. Now she was driving an ATV amidst a field of buffalo. She accidentally ran into a cow and apologized as she returned. I watched all of this as an observer.

Interpretation

A garbage truck is a symbol of old habits that need to be “trashed”. To be a police officer represents one’s morality and conscience. Since my superior is also an officer it suggests I am being helped to follow this moral path. The Alzheimer’s woman likely symbolizes me and my “forgetfulness”. Since the woman runs into a buffalo, which symbolizes survival, strength or power, it suggests that my forgetfulness could harm my survival.

Tending House

I was watering my lawn which was dying and being overgrown by weeds. A kindly neighbor was helping me decide where to water. On one side I discovered a rocky creek with towering trees built into my yard. The trees went up so high I could not see the sky through them. I recall thinking someone had planted them all at the same time.

Inside I was rearranging furniture. I had three living areas and saw more towering trees, this time inside the house! There were people working on art projects as well. I complimented a student on his. He wheeled toward me a cart with a tray of opaque, white goo on it. They were heating it up. Another tray contained pomegranate but it looked more like circular, gel balls. I took one ball and mixed it with the goo and heated it up. I scortched it a little but then took the ball and rubbed it on my feet.

Interpretation

A house is an aspect of my subconscious. The front yard is the part of me I allow others to see. I have weeds in my yard suggesting there are things needing tending to in my life. The water is emotion and my attempt to grow positive relationships in my life. The trees represent a positive aspect of this part of me, specifically my spiritual development and focus on myself. It is the most orderly part of the yard.

Inside my house there are also trees indicating strength. Living rooms represents beliefs I have about myself and life and the barriers I put up between my public and private self. The pomegranate represents good health but also the allure and invitation of sex. The fact that I am rubbing this into my feet suggests that I am seeking to add this into my life and identity.

I felt really off when I woke up over an hour before I was suppose to. I told my guides, “If my sleep is going to keep being interrupted by these weird dreams, I would rather not remember them”. I was reminded of the time period when I did this before and how lacking I felt. I saw this truth but then also saw there was still something lacking. I recognized this “lacking” to be what is interrupting my sleep and causing me to feel disconnected from my life. I saw then the connection between my feet in the dream and my current feelings of being disconnected from my life.

Current Symptoms of the Shift

  • Interrupted sleep
  • Weird dreams
  • Shooting pain up and down right side of body (brief episodes)
  • Itchy Dry skin/acne
  • Melancholy
  • Disinterest in life
  • Aches and pains in body
  • Ringing in ears
  • Moments in life hitting me with vivid clarity/being fully Present
  • Zoning out during the day
  • Disconnected feeling
  • Thirsty
  • Nausea in morning
  • Sty in left eye
  • Restless legs/shooting pains in legs
  • Having to ground at night more often
  • Visual anomalies – lights, flashes, colors, shapes
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You are the Lotus – Message from the High Council

Like many others right now, I am finding myself conflicted with myself over some things in my life. It is not with all things that this happens. As I wrote yesterday, I most often do not disagree with the adjustments and changes I am being asked to consider. However, there is a big one that keeps coming to me: slowly remove myself from social media and decrease my focus upon spiritual pursuits and in turn put my focus more upon living life. In this one small action I allow myself to experience more fully that which I came here to do.

I do not remember my dreams from last night but when I awoke I knew this change was something I was being asked to consider. Thus, I was not happy when I opened my eyes. I did not want to get out of my bed. There is still a part of me that wants to put all my focus in the spiritual but I know, I KNOW, this is not good and will not help me advance.

I decided then and there to stop completely my focus upon the spiritual (this is normal for me – all or nothing mentality) and heard right away my guide saying, “You do not have to do that. Just focus on both equally”.

I don’t know if I can.

As I sat down to write about my experiences I got a message. Perhaps this will resonate with some of you as well.

There comes a time amidst and within the depths of the most uniquely challenging aspects of the Shift, that you will find yourself split between the “I” of the old you and the “We” of the new you. As this occurs, you will feel undoubtedly conflicted about what to do and sometimes even what exactly it is that you are feeling.

This particular process is what you have come here to experience. That which was the old way of living life on Earth is now being discarded, tossed into the wind. Within this action of letting go there is always to be expected some resistance. Fear, nervous apprehension – this is unmistakably the hardest aspect of the Shift many will encounter. It is important that during this time you listen to you inner, most deepest longings; that part of you that wells up from within when you are moved by a moment of love. This part of you, the We that has been emerging for some time, wants only to embrace you and help you lovingly transition into this new world. Like the lotus flower, you will emerge bright and open to experiences, lovingly accepting all that Is into your arms without judgement or self-interest. This is where you will land when this culminating period passes.

All is within your reach.

Do you see it? It is right in front of you! There you are!! Aren’t you beautiful!?

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Shifting Perspective

My perception seems to be shifting. I think it has been going on for some time now but only now am I starting to recognize it as such. Let me explain.

I am finding that I am not motivated to do things for myself as I once use to be. I have always been a very, very selfish person. I struggle with my selfishness problem. Motherhood made my problem even more painfully obvious to me. Yet, even motherhood did not bring about such a dramatic shift in my perception. It helped, yes, but that alone cannot be blamed for this change.

I am by no means saying I am no longer selfish BUT my selfish thoughts are matter-of-factually slammed down by the other Me almost immediately. What is even funnier and out of character for me is that I step back humbly and accept it most of the time. Other times I still argue with myself; yet ultimately I back down.

Above all else, though, the perception shift seems to be that I am becoming less me and more Me. I don’t know how else to put it. The me who wants all the attention, all the credit, all the notice is being overtaken by a Me that wants to give all that away.

It makes me want to cry – in joy and grief at the same time. I am at a loss.

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Swamp Man

Besides the two OBEs I had last night/this morning, I also had vivid dreams in between. In fact, I was dreaming and waking and dreaming and waking all night long. I don’t feel very rested this morning.

Swamp Man

This dream was set in the country. I was with other people talking about different plots of land; farms that were being renovated.

We walked to a small farm that was hidden amidst trees. There was a rundown one-room cabin that no one lived in and I wandered off to explore.

I came upon what appeared to be an animal covered in mud. I was standing atop a hill of dirt and leaves and looked down at him. I had pity for him and so fed him some grass, which he ate. He then moved closer and I finally recognized him as a man. I said, “You’re human!” I could see his face showing through some patches of mud and slime.

Now friends, we walked toward the house that was being renovated and discussed the plumbing. He showed me how they had hooked up the hot water heater and I saw this pump at the base of the house with pipes coming out. He mentioned that the pipes leaked and I saw they were leaking at the joints. We discusses probable solutions and I told him that it made more sense to just rip out all the old plumbing and replace it rather than try to fix really old, brittle pipes.

The Swamp Man then embraced me and I was caught up in an intense energy that woke me up. This is when I felt intense energy sensations and went OOB for the first of two times that night.

Heroine Addict

I was with a group of people inside an apartment in the Projects. No one was inside and we were going to make a recipe and needed specific ingredients. I recall looking for cornmeal and searching through food on the counter and finding some. There was a conversation about being lied to about the results achieved from using this particular recipe.

I was then watching an older, light skinned, African American woman talking to a man. Her face was very vivid in the dream. She had her hair underneath a cloth and was about 50 years of age. She was a Heroine addict but did not appear to be high.

The man with her was interrogating her about our recent visit. What was interesting was how clean her apartment was and how high class it appeared. I could see the other apartments around hers and they were also very high class and upscale. I remember thinking, “They sure have it nice here”.

colors dropplet ripples waterShower

The dreams continued but I will skip to the last one.

There was this very large, glass encased shower. It was the size of a small office. A woman and a man were going inside. I was also inside at times and recall the water coming out of a shower head high above us. It was misting and we were all asked to inhale the midst. This was linked to the heroine dream and I recall thinking this was a way to detox.

I had the idea to change the flow and when I did the mist stopped and a flood of water came out. It was suggested to me that this was not best and so I turned it back to the mist.

It was then that I noticed the man in the shower was the Swamp Man from my previous dream. There he was covered in mud and in front of him was an older woman whose nakedness was very obvious. They embraced and the woman’s breasts pressed up against the Swamp Man and he kissed them. I was completely grossed out by this! The woman caressed the man’s head and I saw the mud begin to come off. There was a bright blue, scaly patch on his head that seemed to glow. I noticed it with great interest and came in for a closer look. It was then that I saw who the Swamp Man really was – he was the man who called himself “Tom Arnold” from my previous OBE!

I immediately awoke from the dream overcome with such loss that I cannot explain. I recognized my guide from the dream and began to talk with him about what was going on. I felt such loss, as if I had let myself down. I did not understand why I was failing at this task!

There was energy all over me, specifically at my crown and the back of my head. I also felt it intensely in my throat, which is a first for me.

I asked “Tom” why he was all covered in mud. He said, “You don’t want to see me”. I also knew this meant there was something about myself I did not want to see. Our conversation revealed that I am afraid to really “see” myself. I am also afraid to trust myself.

I cannot see the truth in the world and in others if I cannot see it within myself.

I was told that I am close and to not despair. But how could I not? The feeling of failure was so intense that I could not return to sleep. As I tried, I was asked to consider how I could lift my spirits, and thus my energy. I resolved to focus upon my family. When I finally fell asleep, I went OOB and had my second OBE of the night.