Tag Archives: energy

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Limbic System

While sitting on the sofa watching T.V. I had a sudden strange energetic sensation hit me. With the feeling came an all-over-body calm, as if I had taken pain medication and it had just taken effect.

At first I thought it was a download because it was centered around my head, but the sensation was not the same. This energy was wrapped around my head and shot down my spine, ending approximately halfway down my back between my shoulder blades. My previously sore neck was now relaxed and almost numb in comparison and my head felt expanded though it also had a strange numbness about it. The feeling reminded me of when I had a spinal block – my entire body seemed expansive and floaty.

I sat there in awe of the feeling, assuming I was receiving healing and grateful for it. I have never felt such intense energy in my head. I could specifically feel it in each of the lobes of my brain, specifically more intense in my right lobe than my left.

I enjoyed it for a while and then went back to watching my television show.

Then I was hit with an increase in intensity of the feeling and I sent out a query to my guide. “What’s going on?” I received back a feeling that all was well and to expect more of the same.

Focusing back on my show, which was a very serious (I was watching Fringe), I suddenly began to cry for no reason. There was a sudden sadness and a few tears, but they did not make sense – completely out of place.

I sent another query out, feeling a bit confused. I saw in my mind’s eye an individual standing in front of me and off to my left and felt from them that I needn’t worry.

Then I heard simply, “Limbic System“. I knew this system was related to the brain and I suspected it was linked to emotions. Sure enough, upon researching it I found that it was. Hmmm. This area of my brain has been worked on before (amygdala).

Currently

The energetic sensations are still present and I feel like I am a walking balloon-head at the moment. Thankfully, the feeling is calming and I am having fun pretending that I am merely experiencing some kind of spiritual “high” for the time being. The sensation makes me want to lay down and close my eyes and just drift off into dreamland. Of course, I can’t do that. Sigh.

I have to add that there came with this energy a strange feeling that this was E.T. related. When I asked what was going on, I sensed a being standing near me to my left. I could not see him and just assumed he was one of my guides. Yet, I connected seeing him to stories of alien abductions – I felt that what was happening to me was similar. I then immediately began to reject what was happening. I quickly calmed this part of me down, but it is still quite alarming if I think about it. This part of me feels quite violated for some reason. Why do I need to be “worked on” and to what purpose? Why is “someone” messing with my emotions like this?

It literally feels like I have been hit with some kind of energy beam from above. It is shooting into my head and down through my spine. My body is reacting to it like it would some kind of narcotic drug and my emotions are turning on for no reason.

All I can do is trust that all is okay. These sensations, these energy “bolts” from out of nowhere don’t hurt me or cause me to get worse. They seem to make me better and better and better. It really is quite surreal. Like something from a SciFi movie.

I feel like saying, “Beam me up, Scottie”.

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Wide Open

I had a realization yesterday. While at yet another meeting, I began feeling anxious and panicky for no reason whatsoever. Yes, I was at a meeting and expected to voice my two cents, but it was nothing out of the ordinary and usually I am quite relaxed at such meetings. So the anxiety was out of place.

I thought at first there must be geomagnetic storms or something causing the anxiety but something didn’t feel right about that conclusion. I felt I should inspect the feeling more and recognized that I had increases in the anxious feeling when I would focus one whomever was talking.

Was I perhaps picking up on their energy?

That was when the idea came to me to surround myself in protection; to block the energies coming in from all around me.

I visualized an egg-shaped shield of protection around my body while focusing my energy into the ground and out through my crown chakra. When I did this, I unintentionally put up the violet flame. I don’t normally do this. Honestly, I don’t remember the last time I put up an energy shield and I don’t recall ever using the violet flame. In fact, I didn’t consciously think, “I invoke the violet flame”. I just noticed that the shield I had erected around me was a pinkish-purple color and the words “violet flame” popped into my head.

Taking deep breaths I left the shield in place and focused my full attention back on the meeting. My heart rate dropped significantly and my breathing settled. I no longer had anxious thoughts when just moments before I had thought, “I am going to pass out” or “I need to get out of here”.

The rest of the day was similarly clouded with anxious thoughts that made no sense. I did not take the time to put the shield in place as I was too distracted and had already forgotten about my experience in the meeting. I had another meeting at the end of the day which had me a bundle of nerves and no matter how I tried to settled (I even stopped to meditate) the nerves would not calm down. I knew in my heart there was no reason for my concern but I seemed unable to control the anxiety over this meeting because my boss had not told me why we were having it.

At the meeting I soon discovered that my intuition had been right. There was no need for the worry. I was being called in for a consult! Haha!

You are Wide Open

I had a headache most of the day that came and went along with the strange changes in mood. I just felt off-kilter most of the day and could not wait to settle down to sleep. Except, like all of my nights this week, I could not fall asleep. I was tired but wide awake and alert for no reason. Thankfully my thoughts were not ridden with negative visions or strange concerns.

As I lay there trying to meditate I focused on my third-eye and heart simultaneously. When I did, I suddenly saw this odd pattern of energy dancing around me. I recognized it as my aura but it was unlike any visual I have ever had of my energy body. It was in waves of pink and indigo and was moving in and out and through me very quickly like electricity. I could see tendrils of color oscillating across my line of sight. It was absolutely spectacular.

As I recognized what I was seeing, a question began to form in my mind. Before the thought was completed my Companion said to me, “You are wide open”.

With this came an understanding that the current process I was going through was causing this sudden openness to everything that I had previously been closed off to. It was like I had returned to my youth, a period when I was bombarded with similar unwanted feelings and found it difficult to cope. But this time I knew how to shield myself but had gotten lazy over time because it had become second-nature. Apparently I could not rely on the shield just automatically being there right now. It would take specific intention to keep myself shielded from unwanted emotion, energy and negative feedback.

Thankfully my headache is gone today but I have energy sensations around my head. It feels like gentle healing energy all around my head and face. Almost like someone is wrapping me in a pillow of energy. It is subtle and calming.

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Zapped with the Dizzies

It happened again. I felt faint, dizzy and fought a full-on panic attack. All this while in a meeting at work! I immediately thought, “I should’ve eaten a snack before this meeting” and looked at the time. It was 10am and I was struggling to control a fast heart-beat by looking out the window at the approaching storm clouds.

Then, almost as quickly as it came on, the feeling faded and by 10:45 the feeling was almost completely gone. I had a snack and it helped me settle even more.

I suspected another geomagnetic K-index of 5 or 6 being that is what initiated the feelings before. I looked it up and sure enough at the time of my dizzy spell and near panic attack there was a K-index of 6.

It looks like this activity will  be going on through tomorrow and there is a watch for more activity later. This is going to be an intense week energy-wise.

K-index definition and explanation.

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You May Now Exit the Roller Coaster

After this morning’s detached feeling, my day began to get frustrating. First, my car was dead when I tried to drive to the gym with my kids. They were all buckled in and then….click. Ominous silence. I am thinking, “Maybe I should just skip the gym today? I don’t really have to go there to do my workout…”.

So out we climbed, me irritated and my youngest unable to process that he was not going to go somewhere in the big car with mommy and his brother. He then followed me yell-crying – “Ouw-wow-wow-wow mahhh-wahhh” – while I called my husband to see if he would come give my car a jump.

My husband called the neighbor who came over with a battery charger in tow. It didn’t work too well. My car was totally dead.

Then we could not get the car into neutral so we could back it out of the garage and properly jump the battery. Apparently, Toyota makes their cars idiot-proof by making sure it won’t go into gear when the battery is dead. Thank goodness for Google which revealed there is a hidden box with a secret button that miraculously unlocks the shifter.

By now I am over an hour later than normal but I still head off to the gym. I had a momentary consideration that maybe I should just skip the gym today. This was the second time I had it. And the second time I disregarded it.

At the gym my littlest became a screaming mess and howled as I left him at the daycare while my older son happily went to play. The childcare worker assured me this was normal and he would calm down when I left. After my 5 minute warm-up the familiar face of the childcare worker popped in to tell me I had to get my child. “We have a policy on crying. We can’t hold them and we can only let them cry so much”.

Really?

By this time I was about ready to lose my cool. I got home and called my husband, thanking him for his help and then bursting into tears when I asked him if he could spare his lunch to watch the kids so I could get a little “me” time. He agreed. I’m not really sure why I cried.

I still felt oddly disconnected as I made lunch and cooled down. By the time my husband called to say he was on his way home I was 100% better and I recognized my failure to listen to the warnings which I had gotten all morning long before, during and now after the ordeal.

After my workout (yes – I finally got to go to the gym!) I got a surge of energy and stability. I finally felt reconnected to my body (a good workout will do that) and still do now.

What is funny is that this hiccup in my day and the high’s and low’s it created left me feeling similar to how one feels when they exit a roller coaster. What a wild ride! hehe

And all I keep thinking is, “This is a dream. This is a dream. This is a dream”.

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Rewired

The 180 degree shift in perspective I experienced on the 1st was brief. It barely lasted 24 hours. The day after was difficult with me falling back into pessimism and doubt. It didn’t help that I stupidly drank some wine so I ended up with only 5 hours total sleep.

Events from Yesterday

It actually started the night before last when my husband got mad at me because I wanted to be alone and he didn’t. He saw this as me “rejecting” him and went into a “tantrum” of sorts. The last thing he said to me was that he thought maybe we should consider “other” options for our marriage. These kinds of phrases are becoming more and more his weapon against me and I should have known it was nothing other than hot air, but it bothered me nonetheless. This, along with the one glass of wine I drank kept me up until 1am.

The next morning I awoke grumpy and went to work without incident. The day went fine but I could not shake the unease caused by my husband’s words the night before. I spent the day thinking about my life and what I wanted to keep and what I didn’t want to keep. Sadly, I was ready to throw it all to the wind and this bothered me immensely. Where was my heart in all this? Non-existent it seemed. Note: Apparently Venus retrograde invites reflection upon relationships to determine if they should stay or go but to hold off on the decision until after it goes direct. Venus goes direct on the 8th but I do not plan to make any changes.

When I got home it was like chaos had hit with a vengeance. My mother-in-law watches my two youngest during the day. She had been instructed to not let them upstairs unattended, but apparently she forgot and I discovered a pair of my eyeglasses had been twisted backward. Thankfully they were the old pair but my new, $400 pair was missing. I went searching and found them safe and sound but covered in little fingerprints.

What was really crazy is that my MIL had done damage all on her own. She had gotten a spoon stuck in the garbage disposal and somehow flushed one of my baby’s shirts down the toilet!

My remedy to this awful mess at home was to lock myself in my bedroom and do 35 minutes of heart-centered yoga. Ahhh!

Rewired

I went to bed wanting the day to disappear and asking questions of my Companion about the purpose of all this and how to fix it all. He responded, but I don’t recall now what he said (this seems to be the pattern these days). I meditated myself to sleep and had more strange dreams.

In one dream I was depositing a $5,200 something check. In another I went to an airport and found a black and white cat in a bag on the elevator. Then I was discussing going on a trip to the Caribbean but I could not take my “boss” with me. At this point I suffered extreme sadness and loneliness as I was told that this trip was a solo trip.

When I awoke I felt somber and asked why I had been told, “We will bring you Home” only to have not have this happen. I was told that Home was within me and that I had misunderstood the message. This, of course, only made me more depressed. It was explained to me that I was being “rewired” but at the same time I heard “retrial”. I felt them to be one in the same.

Strange Memories Resurfacing and Evaporating

Finally, I have strange past-life memories resurfacing at odd times. Mostly, I do not remember them after I have them resurface. It is like they are rising up out of me like smoke, disappearing as they escape. Sometime I can regain the memory, but this is unusual.

One such memory of remembering returned to me while driving. I suddenly remembered waking up one night and remembering suddenly that I had once murdered my own child by drowning him. The memory was not as vivid as the extreme guilt that came with it and I thought to myself, “I should be punished”. With this thought came my Companion’s words, “Haven’t you been punished enough?” and I recalled the life before this one where my own father had drowned me when I was only a child. With this memory came the realization that I have been holding onto the belief that I deserve to be miserable for what I did and that I have been punishing myself ever since. With this belief came also the belief that I was not a good parent. I saw the Karmic cycle and at first thought the child I had drowned had drown me in a later life. I knew this was not the case as it was the actual emotional loss that was cycling, not the relationship. Karma is not revenge, it is a self-inflicted purging.

This all occurred in mere seconds. The words of my guide seemed to help evaporate the feelings that arose within me and I fell asleep quite quickly upon their erasure, the memory of it gone as quickly as it arrives. Yet, it returned to me the next day only to again be lost. I only remembered it yet again when I began to fall asleep that night.

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Thank Heavens for September!

I don’t know about you, but the last few days have been heavy ones for me. The energy seemed stifled and often I felt trapped in a corner without knowing why. Strangely, I was able to remain pretty calm despite this. I could observe the storm brewing deep inside me and I let it brew but kept it from escaping – for the most part.

Then last night, at about 8pm CST, the storm was gone. The energy of it vanished and I felt myself rise up to a higher vibration almost instantly. It was a night and day experience. For the first time in a while my spirits were lifted and my pessimism replaced with a strange optimism. Since I was tired and preparing for bed, I didn’t try to analyze what happened, I just meditated myself to sleep.

I awoke 2 hours later quite suddenly. I saw that the clock said 10:40pm. “That can’t be right”, I thought. So I checked the clock in the hall. Hmm. It really was 10:40pm.

Exchange

Then next time I awoke it was from a dream in which I was discussing an affair I had with Tom Cruise (really not my type). I awoke in the midst of a strong energy rising through my lower three chakras. It had a strong sexual pull with it but was also quite distinctly something else. The energy, unfortunately, hit my second and third chakras in a painful twisted way, but was not so painful as to make me want the energy to stop rising upward.

I let the energy linger for some time but sent a questioning thought to my Companion. The reply was simply, “Exchange” and I knew that the old energy in these chakras was being exchanged for new energy. In my mind a longer explanation came to me suddenly. This exchange had already occurred in the upper chakras and “pain” from this exchange was simply the new energy breaking through old blockages.

Still very optimistic, I let my Companion know that I would be happy to have more similar experiences. The energy was pleasant and persuasive. I could feel the hope and optimism created by the 2nd chakra and willed it to expand. I have missed it!

Peaceful Optimism

After the exchange experience, I fell into a deep sleep and vivid dreams. Every time I would wake up, I felt to have been asleep for many more hours than I had. There was also a strange, heavy energy settled over my head similar to the energy helmet I am use to. My third eye chakra was also active.

The peaceful, optimistic feeling is still with me. Life no longer seems grueling and difficult like it has felt most of August. Relief came with September and I am truly grateful I persevered to this point.

Note: I began taking Maca root yesterday afternoon. Since this is my first experience taking it, I am not sure if it is the cause of this change in mood or if it is indeed an energy shift. It is likely both, but if it is the Maca then it is my new best friend. 🙂

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Something’s Up

Perhaps it is the solar flare activity again or maybe there is another influx of ascension energy (or maybe the two are one in the same?), but I can sense a shift about to take place.

It is hard to put my finger on the exact feeling, so it is hard to describe how it feels. What I will say about the feeling is that it is similar to being put on alert when there is an approaching storm; like a tornado warning. It is not all doom and gloom but more like there is a possibility that something will affect me and my immediate surroundings.

I am, of course, taking it all in stride. There is no immediate threat to me, if threat is even the right word. Like in a tornado warning, I am not concerned. We get them (tornado warnings) all the time in Texas and very rarely does it result in anything other than a thunderstorm. Similarly, I have been through many, many energetic shifts on this path of ascension and so I am use to nothing much happening.

Last night was when the shift in energy became most noticeable. I was watching T.V. and my attention was drawn away from the screen to my Higher Self and that was when the alert feeling occurred. Later, I did 55 minutes of Hatha Yoga and felt my head begin to buzz with energy. This was soon followed by my third eye. The energy then snaked down to my throat area and settled about where my thyroid is located. I became so relaxed during this meditation break that when the woman’s voice returned my entire body twitched because I had forgotten I was doing a video.

When I settled down to sleep I again felt the alert feeling and thought perhaps I would have one of my interesting and somewhat intense nightly excursions OOB. But nothing of the sort happened. Instead, I slept very deeply and had many dreams, one in which I met up with my ex-husband and then watched as streamers of light shot off into the starry sky over an ocean of blue dotted with tropical islands.

When I awoke the song A Rush of Blood to the Head was going through my head as was the song, Come Home. The latter was just the part of the song that says, “So, come home” and the former the part, “And they call as they beckon you on, They said, Start as you mean to go on”.

The feeling is still here today. It is something I just can’t quite put my finger on. So I stay on alert to whatever is coming.

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Kundalini Surge

It’s been a long week. I have read that the energies shifted sometime in the middle of the week. I, personally, did not feel this particular shift, at least not until this morning.

Before bed I asked my guide/Companion/Higher Self to please give me some kind of spiritual experience. It has been many weeks since I have had anything significant and I really, really needed something to keep me motivated. I felt asleep not expecting much since I have been asking the same thing pretty much non-stop since this “break” began mid-June.

Kundalini Surge

I was awakened suddenly out of dream by an intense shooting energy that originated in my root chakra and shot up through my third chakra. The energy was different but very obviously K (Kundalini). I desperately wanted it to rise all the way to my heart chakra but awoke before it got there and was saying to my guide, “No! No!”. I am not sure if it was that I was saying “No” to it rising or “No” to it stopping.

The energy itself was pleasantly painful. I hate to call it that but that is the only way to describe it. It felt like my chakras were being ripped apart but in a good way. Kind of like painfully good sex. The only time in my life I have felt similar sensations in my body was during sex but only while pregnant. For men this will be hard to understand but for those of you who are women and have had sex while pregnant you may.

When pregnant, a woman is either highly sexual or loses all interest in sex. For me, I am a mixture of both – I don’t want sex but I am not against it and when I do have it I suddenly am very, very interested. The entire sexual experience is also very different for me when pregnant. Everything is enhanced and there is a heightened sensitivity to touch. The result is a intensely pleasant and somewhat “painful” experience.

Like I said, hard to describe but this is how last night’s experience was.

I lay there a while wanting the energy to rise to my heart. This was an almost desperate desire for the energy to move and I heard my guide close instructing me to actually take the energy and nudge it upward. Unfortunately, I was too distracted because I needed to use the restroom. When I returned to bed the energy had lessened, though there was quite a bit still lingering in my third chakra and my heart and head had also begun buzzing.

As I tried to fall back to sleep I was reminded of a message my guide had given me of how the integration process would be occurring in the bottom three chakras, originating in the root and rising upward. This was the second such rising.

I lay on my stomach for a while and when I did the energy intensified and I could feel the energy balled up where my second chakra is. It is odd to feel it all the way through to the back! This has happened with my heart before, though.

The energy swirled in a tight ball at first but then began to expand upward into my third chakra where it then expanded more. From there it filled the entire bottom of my rib cage. The energy between the two chakras settled along my spine. It was both hot and cold at the same time and seemed about two inches wider than my spine. It also moved haphazardly back and forth along the spinal column. This is the first time I have felt the K resemble the slithering serpent. It was very cool!

I fell asleep still feeling the ball of energy in my third chakra, though much subtler. This morning my hips ache.

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NASA Has Been Reached

I was planning to take Benadryl last night to help me feel rested but instead felt I should not take my normal B-Complex prior to bed. It worked like a charm! I feel rested and pleasant this morning and I only woke up twice in the night. I am guessing the B-Complex was making my brain too active.

Dream: Whirlpools

I discovered my husband had begun dating a friend of ours after we had a fight. I protested and told him that I had not meant that we should quit our marriage. He decided to return to keep working on fixing our marriage and I was happy with this.

We ended up at a gathering of our church friends. They were all standing in line for some reason and I had a talk with a coworker there who was leaving her job to go to Bigfoot (city name). I told her to take a long vacation and she said she couldn’t because she had a child with special needs. I wondered where Bigfoot was. I’d never heard of such a city. I was pulled South in my mind but doubted it. Turns out it is in Texas!

I wandered into another area where there was a large pool. A friend was in the water with her newborn baby (she is currently pregnant and due in September). She saw me and handed the baby to me, “Here, hold him”, she said. I didn’t want to, though.

I ended up in the pool and the dream shifted dramatically. The pool was very shallow and the bottom was a 3D version of the earth. It covered the entire pool and the vivid greens of the continents moved as the earth rotated. I saw small whirlpools all over the place and happily played in them, the water coming up only to my hips. The whirlpools were all very small and would form and then disappear only to form somewhere else.

I then got pulled toward a very large whirlpool. I heard someone informing me of such occurrences when this happened. I was pulled down quickly. I briefly thought I would go completely under but never did. Instead, I was propelled across the world to another large whirlpool which then flung me again to another and then another. It went so fast I could not see and felt disoriented.

I was then given a survey of what I had experienced. I was not alone, my husband was with me and our responses were being compared. His experiences sometimes matched mine and other times did not.

Whoever was instructing me stopped the process and all was still. I again saw the realistic earth and the swirling whirlpools that covered its surface. It no longer appeared to be water but more like a fluid substance resembling water in which energy currents flowed. I understood the whirlpools to be vortexes. I was reminded of the grid system of energy that covers the earth and knew it had been disrupted. These vortexes were the result of the shift. I was also reminded of the sun and her solar flares. The two were related.

NASA Has Been Reached

I awoke from this realization hearing, “NASA has been reached”. My crown was buzzing and I felt strangely peaceful. There were messages coming in quite quickly but I only remember some of it. I was told my emotional up’s and down’s were a direct result of the vortexes of energy I had just learned about. I was also told, “Your mind is restructuring”.

I wanted to know more about the vortexes. What were they? What caused them? Why were they affecting me when in the past they seemed not to?

The only answer I am now able to remember is that the recent solar flare/sunspot activity has something to do with the amount and intensity of the vortexes, as does the shifting of the poles. The reason I had not been so affected by them in the past was because I was not undergoing the total restructuring process that I am now. The combination of the two creates breaks in the circuitry of the brain at higher rates than would normally occur.

I wondered about the message, “NASA has been reached”. I briefly wondered if I misunderstood. Maybe it was, “NASA has been breached?” I felt it was not correct, though. It makes no sense to me why I received this message. What does NASA have to do with the energy vortexes I saw? Did the solar flares reach the space station? I could not find any evidence of it except an article about the space station losing power on Tuesday.

I was also told, “You are not alone” and understood this to mean in my experiences of late. These same circumstances are also wreaking havoc on others going through the restructuring process.

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What was That?

Sleep deprived me went to work today. Perhaps that is why I had the experience I had?

What was That?

Today I had to report for the typical back to work gathering to welcome new staff and learn about the coming year. I was in a good mood and not thinking about anything in particular when my boss called on me to introduce myself. As this was sudden and unexpected, I looked at him like, “What?” He just smiled and waved me on.

The minute I stood up this energy came seemingly down from above and from the left at the same time. It was like I was shrouded in it. I felt suddenly very much like I was dreaming, as if I had been pushed back from the scene. The faces of the people looking back at me, the tables and windows, the sun shining into the room – it all seemed very shifty. It was literally like whenever this energy settled upon me that the room and its contents shifted upward and away from me, or I shifted upward and away from them.

At the same time this happened I felt very calm and composed. There was not one ounce of anxiety or nervousness. When I spoke my voice sounded hollow, like I was talking through a paper tube.

I continued to speak, saying who I was and what I did. When I finished I could feel my face flushing as I sat down. This was the only sign of nervousness I had.

I immediately felt I had messed up, yet I knew it didn’t matter. All of it felt very unreal.

Hours later I am still wondering what happened.

Was this my Higher Self descending down and somehow taking over?

Or was this the “walk-in” soul taking charge like I was told he would?

Was the original soul displaced when this walk-in came in suddenly? Is that why everything seemed so dreamlike and shifty? Did I get pushed aside? Did I become the observer rather than the performer?

Will this happen again??

Since then I have felt normal. Things feel real enough. The only thing I notice is that my head is buzzing at the back and sides again.