The past few days have been interesting.

Integrating Change and Finding the Present Moment

Though I have not had any spectacular spiritual experiences like OBEs or kundalini energy zaps, I have been experiencing a new phenomenon. It is, I suspect, exactly what my guide warned me was coming. He said I would hear him differently, “from my heart”. I did not understand what he meant but I think I am beginning to.

What I have been experiencing is best described as being “moved” from within to do or say or be something other than is normal for me. Sometimes, though rarely, I do hear my guide as a very quiet thought instructing or directing me; prompting me to consider what I am doing and why. Most of the time, however, there is simply an urge or sudden disposition toward a certain direction.

Examples:

1. After an enturbulating morning cause by my preoccupation with a current problem at work, I began to view the problem from a different standpoint and the ridge of energy I had created against it began to melt away. With this relaxing and withdrawing from the problem, a feeling hit me to break my normal routine. The more I went with this feeling, the more my spirits lifted and I began to feel propelled into action. All I did that was out of the ordinary was go into places I normally wouldn’t and initiate conversations with people, some of whom I had never met.

As I allowed myself to open up, an unfolding occurred from within. It is hard to describe but I felt in my element, more myself than usual. I also noticed how people reacted to this change and how I reacted as well. There was no resistance and the spirits of both myself and those I communicated with were elevated substantially.

What I soon realized was that I had been allowing my Ego to control me and as I focused more upon the moment I was in, rather than on the past situations that my Ego held onto, I began to view everything with fresh perspective. It was as if the strings that held me back were cut and I was let free, free from invisible yet very tangible restraints.

2. Another instance similar to the one above was related to the same work problem. I had received an email and it caused me to become preoccupied with what to do and I was filled with a nervous energy. I became very aware of this energy and had a nudge from within to “let it go” and “focus on something else”. Listening, I decided to take a walk with all three of my children.

Halfway through my walk I felt relief and then an urge to play a game. I initiated what I will call the “color game” with my kids. I would pick a color and we would start looking around for the color and point it out to one another. We all had great fun and it turned into “I Spy” toward the end. All our spirits were lifted and I recognized that I not only had fun but that I had no more interest at all in the previous problem.

This example may seem like no big deal, but for me, it is. I usually do not initiate games nor do I have much fun in playing them.

Learning Lessons in Waking Life

It appears that the lessons I had been learning in OBEs have now shifted to physical reality. I have connected the two experiences and transferred the process into my waking life. I find the voiceless voice that guides me while OOB is guiding me in a similar way throughout my day. My perceptions are focused upon certain things quite suddenly and from within my core. It is almost like someone is saying, “Look here” or “Consider this”, but it is a feeling instead.

I find myself conversing with this part of me throughout the day and I am catching the conversations more and more. This is not the same as it once was where I would have conversations with my guide. It is more like when I am OOB, a kind of consciousness transfer, seamlessly enacted but being brought to the surface for observation and evaluation.

It is quite extraordinary.

How to Be Present in the Moment

I am being taught how to be present in the moment. It happens via the urge to change direction and focus and I do it without knowing I am doing it. When I find myself in the moment I am elated. Yet a part of me feels as if I have been “fooled”. I even one time told myself, “You’re quite clever. You know I resist if I feel forced to do something that is not my idea. So you make it my idea and I suspect nothing”.

The process is occurring more and more seamlessly now, but in the beginning it was a simple question put forth from within that propelled me into the present moment.

That question was simply: What if you look at this moment as if it had never happened, as if this were the first time you ever experienced it? What if you knew you would never again experience this moment? Imagine that.

This was the question/thought I had prior to the experience I had of looking at myself from outside myself. It was mind-blowing and life changing. I have gotten again and again and again.

And as I consider the questions even now, any ridged resistance to the moment melts away. I recognize that it is my Ego that sees these repetitive moments as drudgery because it has a past a present and a future. I have none of these things. I am eternal and timeless. I can experience anything brand new in any moment I choose.

And then there is joy, and the moment.

Other Lessons Learned

I also have seen how my Ego interferes with my purpose. My purpose is undeniable to me – I am here to help others. Currently I do this via counseling. I am seeing how my Ego makes problems, creates barriers and resistance. It forgets easily my purpose preferring to focus upon my physical representation (body) and perceived threats to it.

When I chose to look at the perceived threat from a coworker as an Ego resistance I saw it as it was and the resistance melted away. I was then left to pursue my calling and found joy in doing so. I also saw the reciprocity involved in my chosen path. That which I give to others, I also receive. The advice and lessons I provide as a counselor, I am also learning for myself. How better to learn them than to be a teacher of them. In this process I am both the teacher and the student. Ingenious!