From the perspective of the old.

I am feeling utterly abandoned by the other me. It is as if she just vanished. The drop from bliss to normal has been a shock. I feel like the donkey being led by the carrot. It is such a tease to have such wonderful wholeness and then to be left feeling lacking once again.

If I remember to focus on my heart center, the shock is much less, but it has been difficult for me, especially yesterday. I let my mind do too much thinking about metaphysical and philosophical things. I was warned to avoid thinking as this is the Ego’s domain and of course Ego came out and caused some upset in my household not long after it was allowed free reign.

Symptoms of the Swap

I wanted to list out some of the changes I have noticed in myself since the 28th and the sudden drop back to normalcy.

• Losing time
• Blue, electrical-looking lights upon waking
• Sudden descending calm
• Emotional detachment
• Feeling as if my life and body are not mine
• Warmth in lower three chakras, especially the second chakra
• Increase in psychic chills
• Ringing in ears
• Feeling watched
• Seeing Spirit
• Buzzing around back of head connecting ears
• Third eye buzzing
• Confusion
• Passivity; letting go
• Acceptance
• Perceiving own future
• Mental blocks or fog
• Loss of interest in OBEs
• Odd, jumpy and shifty vibrations upon waking
• Feeling “done” with life
• Deep, dream-filled sleep
• Inability to remember dreams upon waking
• Profound Knowing
• Sudden Remembering

My 5am briefings have stopped but I am still waking around this time. This is normally when I notice the blue lights. They surround images of my fading dreams as I regain conscious awareness of my body. They literally look like neurotransmitters or electrical pulses. Most every time I wake I feel odd vibrations, as if my body is being shaken up and down and left to right all at the same time. I also quickly lose dream images and story lines abruptly upon waking and recall is impossible even when I set the intention to remember.

The ringing is my ears just began a couple of days ago. It starts and then gets very loud. Then, the sound remains for a very long time, so long I get use to it and lose the sound. Yet if I focus on it I can find it immediately, still there. This disappears during the day, thankfully.

The loss of time and detachment to this life are really disorienting. I have been waking up with amnesia and it takes a while to recover my memories and locate myself in time. During the day I often forget what day it is or what time of day it is or even what I am suppose to be doing. I will have to reorient myself – “Okay, it’s Friday. I know this because I just went to work (insert regaining memory of work routine)” – only to once again forget an hour or so later. I did this so many times yesterday that I began to wonder if I was going somewhere else and it was causing these time hiccups. This sudden amnesia and detachment has been going on all week and increasing in intensity and frequency.

There is odd activity in my lower three chakras as well. It is interesting to me, since I have had a dullness in this area for many years now. It is as if my lower chakras have been on vacation, especially my second chakra. Lately, when my heart is activated and the New me comes close, initiating psychic chills (wonderful feeling) my second chakra will light up and a warmth will spread out in that area. It is so nice to feel in that area again!

Some changes have been on-going since the week of bliss and feeling whole. The descending calm, buzzing in upper chakras. profound Knowing, Remembering, loss of interest in OBEs, acceptance, letting-go, mental fog/blocks, seeing Spirit and feeling watched, and perceiving my own future are all such changes. Perhaps these are permanent?