My assignment is to learn more about Alchemy. Here is my first lesson.
Author Archives
Preparation for June Shift
If you are experiencing what I am – extreme exhaustion, crown and third-eye chakra intensity, mental fog, inability to focus or keep your eyes open – then you are in the midst of a download right alongside me. I am told mine will last two days, but I suspect that everyone’s experience will vary depending on their individual needs.
We are heading headlong into another extreme energy shift that will begin in June and last until the summer solstice. June will be monumental for many. If you have already sensed that this is true for you, then your guidance has been trying to warn you. Well here is another warning. Caution: Treacherous terrain ahead.
I see a tightrope ahead of me. Balance is key. One cannot remain on this tightrope without remaining focused and maintaining balance. On either side is a pit of molten lava. Whew! It makes me a bit nervous seeing such a vision. Hopefully there aren’t too many others facing tightropes over deep, fiery pits. lol But I am reassured that this is just a warning. The circumstances surrounding this Shift will only be to the extent that you can handle, nothing more than that.
Women especially will experience this Shift uniquely. We are coming into our own power and releasing the bonds that have so strictly confined our creative power and energy. We will take a stand in various ways this summer. What exactly you will feel empowered to do will depend on what is needed for you to progress in your individual transformation.
This is not a forerunner only transformation either. As a forerunner myself, I often forget to directly address those of the other “waves” who have recently been activated. You are now coming into your own power as a group and taking up the reins of your projected paths. Some of you will be taking over where the forerunners left off – becoming gridworkers, gatekeepers, energy manipulators – you name it. But honestly, us forerunners are not all done, so the transfer will not be all at once. It doesn’t really matter, though, just know that you will hear you own “call” soon enough if you haven’t already.
I’ve Emerged from the Vortex
Whew! Feeling a bit out of it still, too. LOL
In the three days I was in Mt. Shasta I was in a constant vibratory state. I have never felt so alive in my life. WOW!
There is way too much to write and I am still in recovery mode. Actually, I think I am in a state of mild shock. Re-entry into my 3D life will take some effort on my part I think. I feel like I have been on the mother ship for three days.
Here are some photos of my trip to give you an idea of where I have been. 🙂 Enjoy!
Dream: Flight to Brussels
It is pouring rain here. Again. lol After 7 years of drought the rain is very welcomed but there seems to be an over abundance of it. Isn’t that how it is with spiritual transformation, too? That is what I have observed for myself anyway. Periods of drought (7 years for me, too) and then periodic deluges. I wonder why it works like that?
For some reason the rain makes me sleep deeper and gives me heavy eyes when I try to wake up. Such a wonderful, heavenly feeling. It makes me never want to wake up!
I had a very intensely vivid dream last night, too, which made me want to stay asleep a bit longer.
Dream: Flight to Brussels
I was led on board an airplane with my family except that my family consisted of my mom and my three children. My husband was not present.
The attendant led us to a grouping of seats and we each looked at our tickets to find where our seats were. There were approximately six rows of seats each three seats wide. We were spread out and not sitting together. My youngest’s seat was near the window and mine was on the aisle. I was upset about this for some reason. There was a man, a stranger, who questioned me about my upset. I don’t remember what I said now.
Then I noticed just how very large the airplane was. Instead of the aisle being a few feet wide it spread for probably a hundred feet, maybe more. In the center was a large dome and a circular area which had a circular half wall separating it from the rest of the aircraft. I knew that in this area was where demonstrations were held, specifically demonstrations between two people who were to experience Union. In the dream Union was assumed to be a sexual act.
There was discussion about arriving at our destination. I was told we had made it to Denmark but I was upset because my destination was Brussels.
When we arrived we did not exit the aircraft. Instead, a woman met me and we went into the domed area. She was shorter than me with dark hair and reminded me of a friend from school so I kept associating her with that person. Yet she was definitely not that person. She kept coming toward me and I kept avoiding her because my thought was that she wanted to have sex with me and I was in no way interested. I realize now that was not her intention.
There was one point where I took off all my clothes and explained to her that it made me feel free. I remember wishing I were in the mountains at that time. How nice it would be to run around naked in the mountains, I thought. lol
I recall in speaking with this woman that I mentioned how people in my family had recently died. I specifically remember telling her my mom died. There were two others that had also died but I can’t remember who now. They were all family members.
Considerations
I believe the aircraft I was on was representative of a place that I visited that was not of the Earth plane. The domed area is familiar to me. My feeling from this dream is that I am preparing for Union, or the K-rising that I have been forewarned about. I am not sure why I was met by a woman but perhaps there is a need for me to be open to both sexes; to embrace both aspects of mySelf. This feels right and usually, in past dream experiences, the female gender has been embraced as often as the male, if not more. I have always been more attracted to the female form but not necessarily sexually attracted.
Two Recent Signs
The universe has been sending me some pretty obvious messages lately that I wanted to share.
Blue Jay
Blue Jay has visited me before back in January, but recently he is showing himself again. The first time was quite unexpected and unusual. I cannot recall just when this happened (a couple of weeks ago maybe?) but on a walk with my youngest one afternoon I came upon three baby blue jays hopping about on the sidewalk. They were too young to fly yet, so likely they had prematurely falling from their nest. They had enough feathers and ability to fly short distances but would have been an easy catch if I had wanted to do that. Instead, my son and I stopped and watched the three babies bounce about and chirp to their parents in the trees above.
I had never seen a baby Blue Jay before. In fact, I have not seen many jays in my lifetime, at least not this close up. When I lived a hour north of my location now blue jays were very, very rare. Here near the city they are more common, this year especially.
In addition to the close encounter with the baby jays I have a pair of blue jay parents dive bombing my bird feeder. I purposefully bought a finch feeder with very tiny perches to keep the larger birds away. I prefer feeding the pretty songbirds like Cardinals. Anyway, the jay is very smart and has figured out how to get to the seed despite being way to big for the feeder. I have been watching as they grab some sunflower seed, take it to a nearby tree to eat and then return for more. The somehow manage to get the seed by balancing on the lower perches sideways, wings flapping. They also have babies that look like adults who they share their winnings with.
Eleven
As if the Blue Jays weren’t enough of a hint, the universe decided to give me a more obvious message. Yesterday afternoon I kept feeling something on the inside of my pants that created a slightly annoying itch. I brushed my leg several times and the last time I noticed something was stuck to my leg. I pulled it off and it was this:
Though the image is very large here, this is a tiny sticker maybe half and inch square. It is likely an inspection sticker from my pants. When I saw it I laughed out loud. The universe couldn’t have been anymore obvious!
When looking up the angel number of 11 I usually go to the Joanne Sacred Scribes website. This time, however, that explanation did not feel right. So I went to this site instead. I like how it immediately states that the number 1, which is doubled in 11, indicates a new chapter or fresh start. Two ones together, 11, symbolize a doorway. New opportunities await.
The message hit me hard while I was doing yoga. This is not unusual, something about yoga intensifies the connection I have with my Team. Usually my crown or third-eye will light up. I was hit very hard with a realization that something profound was approaching. I remember the realization made me hold my breath because the consideration of “it” made me a bit nervous. It was primarily a feeling so I can’t say what exactly “it” is. Regardless, the message of 11 was reinforced.
Kundalini After Effects
It’s times like these I wonder, “Why me?” lol
Two mornings ago, after my last Kundalini episode, I began to notice the tell-tell signs of a yeast infection. This is not a common occurrence for me, I’ve maybe had 3 my entire life, so I was a bit slow in figuring it out. Yesterday there was no longer any doubt in my mind. Ugh! So bought the treatment but had to wait until evening to use it. Not that a yeast infection is a big deal for me, just a minor nuisance.
Then last night, right before bed and after 30 minutes of Hatha yoga my throat began to get hot and sore. On top of that I had an unusual amount of saliva! Both right when I was trying to get to sleep. The throat soreness was bearable but the saliva kept me from falling asleep because I kept having to swallow and with each swallow I was reminded of my throat soreness.
Online research said what I was experiencing was normal. Since I have had this happen in the past I accepted this answer. The solution was taking Benadryl as it will dry out the sinuses. So that is what I did.
Then my throat started really burning, like hot hell fire burning. I had to suck on a nasty Cepocal lozenge just to make it bearable. At the same time I guess the medication for the yeast infection exacerbated the situation because it became very uncomfortable in that area as well.
So there I was in bed, hoping for a good night’s sleep realizing that was not going to happen. No way! I had a fire in my crotch (lol) and a fire in my throat at the same time! I’m thinking, “OMG what kind of joke is this?? Really!?”
I got maybe 4 hours of sleep total last night. Each time I would enter into a dream I would end up awake from the burning in my throat. Sigh.
I blame Kundalini for this. The last cycle of energies must have blown out a blockage in my root and fifth chakras. I’m pleased to have cleared something but not pleased that my body reacted with illness. I wish that didn’t happen. I ended up with a two week long sinus infection last time. Hoping this time the issues remain minor as I will be in Mt Shasta by Friday and really don’t want to be sick and miserable.
At least I am getting a good laugh. The universe really has a sense of humor!
Chapter 5
So much has transpired in the last week that I tend to forget some of what I am told by my Team of guides.
One such tidbit of information was that I had begun Chapter 5. If you have been following my blog for some time, you will be familiar with the chapter theme. I have been given chapter numbers for a while now and Chapter 4 began in March, 2016.
In considering what has transpired since March this year, I will say that indeed my focus was put all on my family and spiritual transformation. Distractions were removed but it took some time on my part to remove them all. I do not recall being asked to channel much in this time period, though. I believe my distraction was the main cause. I was too fixated on a particular issue to be bothered with channeling.
Chapter 5 is about communication and interaction with others. In receiving information about this particular chapter I noticed how this chapter seems very much to correspond with the 5th chakra. In considering this it was confirmed that chapter progression is linked to the Kundalini progression upward through each chakra. This makes complete sense considering I was told there are 7 chapters total.
What I was shown/knew about this next stage in my development was that I was to work on expressing mySelf and all I had learned about mySelf via the most recent transformative process (beginning the fall of 2015). Communication is an essential part of manifestation. You must state clearly what it is you wish to manifest. This involves also being in tune with yourSelf, specifically having a clear and open heart.
Honestly, I don’t feel I have an issue with communicating. If anything, I am too blunt and honest and don’t put near enough thought into what I have to say before I say it. I blame my Sagittarius moon for this personality flaw (or gift depending on how you look at it). Yet there are things I rarely express in words with the people in my life that will need to be said at some point. Most is related to my spiritual beliefs and experiences.
Then there is the sharing of my experiences with others outside of my family. The focus is on face-to-face communication here. Getting out and meeting new people. This is also part of Chapter 5. I will be flying to Mt. Shasta, CA at the end of this week, so this part of my path is set to begin really soon.
Chapter 5’s theme also goes along really well with what my astrological forecast showed would be happening for me starting this summer and ending next summer.
Dreams: Prison, Dead Dog and History Class
Found this in my drafts folder from over a month ago. Not sure why I never posted it.
Very active dream night.
Dream: Prison
I was with a group consisting of two men and two women and myself. We had just been released from prison and were in holding together. There was a backstory connected to the two men, but I cannot remember it now. What I do remember is being with the other women, segregated from the men. I was suppose to take a bath and clean up and was walking back and forth between the bathroom/women’s quarters and another place. I don’t remember being naked but I do recall the men staring at me. Yet I was comfortable with them. It was like they were my family.
The feeling is that we were preparing to be released after years spent in a sort of prison. Prison is the best word, though I do not feel it is an accurate description.
Dream: Dead Dog
I was in a dorm-type room and it felt similar to college for some reason. I did not feel like I belonged there. Again, it was a segregated-type feeling. Men were with men, women with women. The women didn’t like me and had killed my little, white dog. They laughed at me as I took the body of the dog and fled out of the room. When no one was looking, I took the body of my dog, now in a small wooden box, and sneaked outside. It was a brilliantly beautiful day and I could see a field of green in front of me. In the distance was a forest. I could see the door behind me, lit up against a stark, white building with no other openings. The building rose so high I could not see the top.
I began to tip-toe into the field when I heard a voice and saw that a group of the men were coming in from a training exercise. I could not hide. I was out in the open. So I just froze there, hoping no one would see me. I never got to bury my dog as I was seen and taken back inside to my room.
Dream: History Class
I found myself inside a classroom with other students. In front of me was a test, a U.S. History test. I felt out of place and did not understand why I was in this class again! I saw the teacher in the front of the room watching everyone. I took the test but knew all the answers and didn’t care if I passed or failed. I was going to get this fixed because I did not belong in this class.
The teacher had us grade our own tests. I only missed one. He took them up and then passed them out again and had marked on my test. The grade was an 86 and he marked two more wrong. 3 wrong? I was angry at him.
I left the classroom intent on fixing the issue by changing my schedule. I was NOT taking that stupid class again!!
Interpretation
Writing what I think the dreams mean now, versus a month ago when I had them.
The prison dream had a feeling of awakening with it and upon reading it again I realize this is an accurate interpretation. There was a series of dreams at this time in which I was with a small group of family in Spirit. We were being released from contracts I believe and preparing to go out “on our own” so to speak. I can see the developments in my life pertaining to this dream now as I prepare to head to Mt. Shasta.
The second dream is relating to how I had been feeling at the time. Trapped and struggling with an internal split. I felt betrayed (dead dog) but not sure by who. I escaped but was recaptured indicating a feeling of failure or lack of ability to free myself from life’s circumstances.
The history class I believe is related to past life events and healing/learning from them. I feel I have already been there/done that yet I am still required to review and test over the same subject. It is very frustrating!
Revelations from the Kundalini
It has been an Ah-Ha kinda morning! When I woke up, I even talked to my husband for a good 30 minutes straight about my realizations. That in itself is a shock. lol
Since the Kundalini has begun to rise with such intensity, my Companion continues to ask me the same question over and over. “What do you feel?” he will ask. I think and think but the answer has been too complicated. What I feel is too difficult to describe! It is beyond my ability to articulate!
At night and during any meditation break I am asked this question. Last night was no exception. “What do you feel?” I was asked again. Just thinking about the feeling made me cry. It is so amazingly beautiful!
I was unable to stop my tears. They just slowly dripped from my eyes as I recalled the feeling of the Kundalini. My memory of it brought back the heart warmth and only made me miss it more. I remember thinking, “This must be what a heroine addict feels like.” lol
As I calmed, the only word that came to mind was “potentiality”.
That’s when it hit me. The feelings were my own potentiality being realized. The Kundalini is self-realization.
I had already heard of self-realization, or self-actualization, from my school years. Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs came to mind. Read the article in the link if you need a refresher. With this my understanding of self-realization/self-actualization was complete. I never truly understood it until now.
In explaining it to my husband this morning, it was just made more clear to me. The reason the K is so intense, so overwhelming beautiful, is that as it rises one’s full potential is expanded and realized via each of the chakras. So, as the K rises through the root chakra, all one’s potential to create and experience within the scope of this chakra is realized. It creates a heavenly explosion of all that the root chakra encompasses. And to be clear, the explosion of potentiality is neither good nor bad, it just IS. And with each chakra the potentiality is realized and builds upon the others.
In my mind I understood with complete clarity what was occurring and why and what I was feeling. It is like every emotion, every lifetime, and all the potential within me to express myself is contained in the K energy. It is unrestrained, unrestricted, undefined. It is timeless and all-encompassing. And all of it, every seductive, succulent piece of it, is ME.
This potentiality within the experience of the Kundalini is so vast, so expansive, that when one succumbs to it (which one cannot avoid) there is no longer a need to experience within the confines of the physical because the potentiality of all of the Self is realized. This explains the feeling of impending “death” that accompanies the K. With death, one completely succumbs and let’s go. They transcend this reality and enter the the place of no-time. The place where everything just IS, all at once. There is no wanting, no lacking, no judgement.
Within the lower chakras is contained every emotion and expression therein that I am capable of. Within the upper chakras is contained my manifestation potential. The spark that lights the fire of creation. My fifth chakra, the chakra of communication, is the first manifestation outlet. Speak your truth. Create your reality via expression. Sing your emotions. Sing the life you wish to create. Give your potential a voice, a personality, a channel from which to project itself.
Entrance into the physical reality singles out one’s potential. It is focus upon specific potentialities. So that when we are here in this physical experience, we are choosing to manifest a specific aspect of ourSelf – a potentiality in physical form. The reason the K can create such upset for one within the physical experience of it is because the physical is incapable of expressing all of one’s potential in one lifetime. It is meant to limit us to only the expression of some of our potential. It is finite.
The path to K is overwhelming to the physical Experiencer and can result in insanity if irresponsibly set upon. Resistance to the K once initiated can also result in a feeling of insanity. So if you have K-rising, just accept and succumb. The results will be beyond imagining.
Another Past Life Revealed
After the Kundalini experience this morning (which I wrote about here), I fell to sleep and entered into a vivid dream. This dream revealed yet another past life, one which I had not previously recalled.
Dream: Past Life
I was standing outside on a pier. I don’t know where this pier was nor the time period. My main intention for being there was to resolve an issue from a past life. I knew this. I also knew I was male.
In front of me was a person I know from this life. She was a classmate of mine from 5th grade until graduation from high school. When I saw her in the dream, though, I knew her as someone I had wronged. She had been my lover many years before and I had left her suddenly without cause or reason given. This had left her wondering and sad for the remainder of her life. Though she continued on in that life, she was left with the scar. I had come to ask her forgiveness and allow us both to heal.
I approached her, asking her how she had been all this time. She was melancholy and there was discussion of her marrying and having children. I recall seeing scenes from her life but now they are a blur. I was very caring with her and gentle, trying to sooth her upset. I apologized for my actions, for leaving her without notice and never contacting her to explain. There was discussion of a child lost. A young boy who died as a child. I am not sure but he may have been our child and I remember feeling very sorry for never having met him.
There was toward the end of this dream a feeling of moving on for us both.
Resolution?
Upon waking I knew with certainty why my relationship with her in this life had been what it had been. It was so very clear!
The entire time I knew her in this life she was very beautiful and one of the popular girls. I envied her for both things but also recognized that her position was gained only because she was presented a false version of herself to others. I absolutely despise those who are fake/lie and cannot stand to be around them. In middle school I did not know this about myself. I assumed I was just jealous and was hard on myself for my tendency to shy away from most girls my age because of their fakeness.
At one point this girl, who I will call B, wanted to be my friend. She was especially persistent in acquiring my friendship and I eagerly became her best friend despite not liking her very much. She had a strange interest in me, though, and I did in her as well. My interest was mostly curiosity. I wanted to know who she really was. I quickly learned more than I wanted to know.
She was always looking at me when I undressed and commenting on my appearance. I was especially mature for my age. At 13 I looked like I do now. She, on the other hand, had not even begun to get her breasts. She also wanted to know everything about me. She was constantly asking questions and wanting to come spend the night. When over at my house she would ask my family about me. It made me very uncomfortable. I later learned she was gaining information to use against me if needed. This was how she played all of her friends. Quite despicable!
She also used our friendship to get material things. She had little money-wise and considered me “rich” because we had a swimming pool (funny!). She often was able to get me to buy her things – she was very persuasive!
Eventually she began to use our friendship to her advantage at school. I was one of the smart kids in school. She was not. lol She often got answers to math questions from me and at one point I got fed up with it. I did not like being a part of her cheating. During a test I loudly stated, “No, I will not let you cheat off me, B.” Everyone in the classroom, including the teacher, heard me and stared at her wide-eyed. I’m sure she was completely humiliated. When things calmed she turned to me with an evil look and said, “I guess we aren’t friends anymore.” I responded, “I guess not.”
From that point on she made it her job to make my life miserable as best she could. I, thankfully, didn’t care much about social acceptance and kept to myself. But I hated her from then on because what she presented to others was a lie. She has been in my dreams on and off ever since, which drove me crazy!
Upon realizing this past life, I understood why we were destined to have this relationship in this life. Had we been of opposite genders, then we likely would have played into our past life roles. Either way, we would have hated one another because the past life was left with such animosity on her part because our relationship was never resolved. I hope now that it has been!
