Streamlining the Self

Update you all might be interested in. Thanks for reading! ❤

Dayna's avatarA Walk-In Life

Integration is almost complete and I am noticing a substantial difference in myself. I have been told for longer than I can recall, “You are changing.” I have noticed this and that along the way, but currently there are so many changes I am noticing that it is mind boggling. I am so different than I use to be in so many ways. It seems miraculous, but it isn’t.

My Companion says it is the result of “streamlining the Self”.

Streamline definition from Dictionary.com:

1. a teardrop line of contour offering the least possible resistance to a current of air, water, etc.
2. the path of a particle that is flowing steadily and without turbulence in a fluid past an object……..
4. to alter in order to make more efficient or simple.

The Discussion

After waking this morning I recalled that there was discussion in my dreams of all the progress I had made…

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Proof that a Life Issue is Resolving

Yesterday I felt a bit restless. I kept thinking that I needed to do something. Do something about the debt I let my husband incur last year. Do something to feel more fulfilled and purposeful. Just do Something! It was a nagging feeling. I even looked for jobs online and discovered an opening for a part-time school counselor position just a 9 minute commute from our house. I thought about it but hesitated. So I opted to update my resume and CV and then decide if I would apply. Even after doing that something wasn’t right about it. I remembered that Mercury went retrograde that same day. It is not a good idea to get a new job or interview during a Mercury retrograde. So, using that as an excuse, I sat on it. The posting doesn’t close until the 20th anyway.

Then today my husband comes home and tells me he is getting a $25,660 bonus. What!!!?? Whoa! Now that he is on the bonus system that came with his new position as general manager he gets bonuses every quarter. This is his first. He will get three more this year. It is likely they will be big like this one, but maybe not. They fluctuate.

Regardless, now I know why I hesitated about the job. I felt in my heart that I did not want it. It made me uneasy just to consider going back to work even after my most recent good experience. I just don’t want to. You know what is really crazy? His bonus is about what I would make if I were to work part-time again. I would have to spend an entire year dealing with education system bureaucracy to make that amount, too. Now, it is coming as a check next week. Ha!

As I was thinking about this whole sequence of events and its peculiarity, I recalled that last Saturday out of the blue I just decided that I was OK with being in debt and paying ridiculous interest. I saw it was just a condition I placed on myself and my life that stressed me out. Who on this planet doesn’t have some sort of debt anyway? Money is meant to be spent, life is meant to be lived. I don’t want to spend any more time worrying about money and choosing not to live and enjoy my life because something costs too much. I already spent too much of my life doing that and it has NOT made me a happy person. So I announced to my husband that I was done stressing and fighting over money. No more. Done.

Now he gets this bonus? Hmmm. I seriously doubt it’s a coincidence. My husband has been at odds with his boss since her parents (and previous owners) died. She put his younger brother in a top position and refused for two years to put my husband in the position he had been promised by her father. My husband pushed for the position because I pushed him to push for it. He finally got promoted in 2015 (and I promptly left my job) but she refused to let him get the bonuses he was suppose to for over a full year for this reason or that. Suddenly, this year, she is finally giving them to him and it comes right when we need it, after I decide to let go of my considerations about the debt we are in and after I opt out of yet another part-time position I don’t want yet would have chosen to work just for the money.

The way I see it, all of it is tied to me finally being ready to let go of my financial beliefs and considerations. It has been an on-going life struggle for me, one I seemed to bring in with me from another lifetime. As a child of only 7 years old I remember getting money and hoarding it, saving it for who knows what, while my sisters happily spent theirs and ate their candy or got their toy. I would sit and scowl at them thinking I was right, I knew better because some day that money would be needed. LOL

In the past two years I have made phenomenal progress towards resolving my issues with money. When I announced to my husband that I was OK with being in debt, that I no longer cared, I really meant it. You all have seen my progress with this issue via this blog here and there. Lately I forget to pay bills (scandalous!) and end up with high late fees and…I just don’t care. Our savings is the lowest it has ever been and….I just don’t care. Considering I always had at least three months salary (more usually) in savings this is unbelievable for me. In 2014 I use to check our checking account frequently, sometimes daily, and nag my husband about not staying on budget, spending this or that, etc. Now I can’t remember the last time I checked our checking account balance.

There are countless more examples of how I’ve changed in regard to money. I’m a totally different person in that regard now. Really. And no, I am not going to the extreme opposite now and becoming a spendaholic and not caring at all. I still care, I just don’t obsess and stress anymore.

My consideration about money now? If it gets spent, that means more is on the way. There will always be more. My Companion told me (still does) – You will always have enough. My new consideration is also that. I will always have enough. And I always have.

What we resist does really persist. And when we stop resisting it, it really does resolve.

Final Preparations Continue

Had a full moon Kundalini lucid dream experience last night within an hour of falling asleep. It was another preparation for the full rising. Based on the dream symbolism I suspect more Kundalini dreams/experiences will be coming by Easter. Thanks for reading. ❤

Dayna's avatarA Walk-In Life

Last night while meditating my Companion told me he would be meeting me later that night. By the time I was in bed doing my nightly meditation I had all but forgotten about it. While meditating he reminded me. I had noticed a difference in the energy throughout the day and by this time it was very acute. So, I did not doubt my Companion would do what he said.

EFT

While meditating I was led to do something I have never done. I began to tap with three fingers on certain points on my body. At first I did this on my pelvis quite unconsciously but was led to pay attention to what I was doing. Next, I felt led to tap on the space just above my heart. After that I felt drawn to tap on my left wrist area. Then I was drawn to tap on the spaces right…

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Portal Section Theme: Form Follows Function

We are three days into the second section of the Equinox portal that opened up on April 7th. So far, I have not noticed any significant differences from the first section except a smoothing out of the energies and a rise in Kundalini energy. The Kundalini fluctuations may or may not be a part of your individual experiences, however.

Much work continues in the dreamstate. Deeper, more prolong periods of slumber accompany this section of the portal. During waking hours there is more immersion in 3D life, more focus and enjoyment of those things which previously there was disinterest or no motivation toward.

As a theme for this section I am led to the principal of “form follows function”. This is a principal used in architecture but it also has applications in Biology. “Form follows function” means that “structures are formed in direct correlation to what they are meant to do.” All the work we have been doing, all the healing, purging, integration, acceleration and accommodation of new energies, it has all been to update and bring into alignment our “form”. Form here does not only refer to our biological form, this is also applicable, but also to our energetic structure. We have been making adjustment to our “form” so that we can fulfill our “function” here, whatever that function may be. Function = mission. We are now at the point where we can begin our work and fulfill our intended mission(s) here.

Not all of us are ready yet. Our form must be tweaked and calibrated, adjustments may still be needed before we are 100% ready to jump into action. Action here doesn’t necessarily mean we are to make drastic, overnight change.  Though some of us may feel a near compulsion to do so, it is not advised. Think of this time period as a trial run where we try out our new form, get use to it and make adjustments to our lives to accommodate it.

Thus, the focus on 3D life again. We can’t know the exact applications (and implications) of our new form without taking it for a test drive in 3D. Yes, we have had many similar periods of more focus on 3D life, but this one is different. There will be less resistance, less fear and less internal conflict this time. Less doesn’t mean “none”, though. It all depends on your individual progress and readiness.

For me, personally, I am surprising myself. This weekend I have been extra busy and focused on 3D life. The most out-of-character thing I did was spontaneously invite my BIL’s and their families over for BBQ. I did this without taking to my husband first. Usually he is the social one and does the invites with resistance from me. Similarly, I let my daughter’s friend sleepover and took them shopping, buying them matching shirts. All the while my husband was putting in a new sprinkler line (my idea) and there was mud and mess going through my kitchen and living area. Total chaos that didn’t trigger me like usual. Finally, I decided to stop worrying over a large debt my husband and I owe, announcing to him that I was fine with us just paying the interest over time and that I was not going to stress over it anymore. Ha!

It is the focus on 3D that will help us to notice that we have changed and for the better. It also helps us see where we have more work to do.

 

Spirals within Spirals

Woke this morning with scattered memories of very detail-oriented dreams about the life continuum. I was working specifically with a symbol. I wish I could recall it now, but in the dream I was holding it and scrutinizing it. It was small, about the size of a fifty-cent piece, silver and mostly rectangular in shape.

What I brought back was Knowing that the spiral of life is much more complex than I ever could have imagined. I saw spirals within spirals that doubled back on themselves creating a circuit of extremes. It would be like the infinity symbol made of spirals – no ending and no beginning. One section would have much more distance between the points on the spiral, making the spiral-circle appear lopsided. All of these spirals contained within them lifetimes. Not just one lifetime but lifetimes – plural. However, one spiral contained a particular life theme or lesson meant to be learned within the spirals of lifetimes contained within it.

All of these spirals within spirals seemed to double back on themselves, returning to the point of origination, or the point on the spiral where the concept of the experience first “split” and then split again and again and so on. Whatever the concept was, it would expand into so many versions of itself that the spirals multiplied exponentially.

The symbol that I mentioned earlier represents one concept on one spiral of experiences within a larger spiral of experience. My scrutiny of it was similar to how a researcher looks at the results of an experiment. The feeling was that I was seeking a specific result and would make adjustments in order to get to the end result I wanted. Each adjustment resulted in a new spiral. That end result ultimately is a return to the original concept, a full-circle from initial conception to complete maturation through experiential means.

When I woke up and had this information in my mind I was a bit overwhelmed. It felt as if I had spent the night in a laboratory discussing scientific subjects beyond my human ability to comprehend.

When I attempted to recall the dream that went with this Knowing I received back a reminder of a movie I watched a couple of weeks ago. The movie is called, The Discovery.

You will have to watch the movie to get how it helps to explain the information I brought back from dreamtime. It provides more of an understanding of how the spirals might look from a human, experiential perspective, though.

At this point in my spiritual evolution I have learned when to stop trying to understand something that is way beyond my human ability to comprehend. This is one of those times. I have to trust that at some level this process, of which life plays a part, is purposeful and that I understand and choose to participate in it.

Lucid Dream: Dry Lake to Control Freak

Slept 11 hours last night. I’m really enjoying sleeping this much. It is a rarity. Unfortunately, I awoke to my daughter freaking out because her younger brother had broken a glass all over the kitchen floor. She had a sleepover last night so I had two drama queens to contend with. lol Thankfully her friend seems not to be a morning person and was pretty quiet.

Dream: Dry Lake to Control Freak

Woke at 5:30am and asked to project. Fell back to sleep and entered into a semi-lucid dream. I was traveling with a man across the tallest bridge I have ever seen over a massive lake. The bridge was golden in color and had what seemed like levels that rose high up into the sky. There were people in these levels, too, all waiting for something. Men, women, children of all races. They wore nondescript clothing that appeared identical to me. All of them had looks of anticipation on their faces, as if they were hoping something or someone had come for them. To help? To bring them something? I don’t know.

I closed my eyes, scared of being up so high. I took a peek out several times. Every time I did I would look down and see the lake below me and this very narrow, golden footpath my partner was using but I never saw his feet. It was like we were floating. I knew then my partner was carrying me.

We arrived at a lake and I lost track of my partner. I swam across it with a group of people. On the opposite shore we turned back to go to a spot out in the lake to see a penguin. I recall wearing goggles. From there we watched something on a large screen, me wearing my goggles. I took them off momentarily to adjust them and felt someone grab my leg. I was pulled under and I could not make it back up for air. I was held under far longer than I should have survived and knew I was dreaming. Full-on lucidity resulted.

I came up out of the water and saw my friends were all gone. There was a giant killer whale float we had been using and it was in the distance. I swan toward it only to find the water disappearing. I saw thousands of people and floats coming toward me walking in the waist deep water. I asked someone if they had seen my partner. No one had.

By the then the water was completely gone. I saw a pick-up and began to push it toward the shore. It’s headlights were on. The sun was peeking over the tops of the trees and I could see a hedge of bushes in front of me. I stopped the truck there and looked at a short wall. There was a subdivision of houses on the other side. I wanted to explore it.  I thought, “Should I take control of the dream?” I decided, “No, I think I will see where this takes me. I am curious.”

I jumped the wall and went up to a street sign. It was still very dark but I saw the street was S. 48th St. I knew it was far from my home. I walked along the streets for a while when a small mobile home caught my eye. It was well taken care of and I decided to explore it. I walked up the ramp leading the the front door. There was a very large grandfather clock taking up half the walkway. I bumped into it and it almost fell.

The door was open. I went inside and saw a small child laying on the sofa. She woke up crying and I picked her up. She looked Indian and was very small. She said her head hurt. I saw an Indian woman in the other room watching TV and went toward her. She panicked at first but then was concerned for the child, too. She said to me, “I knew someone would come looking for her mother.” The woman took us to a bed around the corner. The woman was there asleep. The child crawled up to her mom.

Then the woman told me their story. How the mom got sick and could not function. She had terrible, incapacitating headaches. Now her daughter was getting them, too. I went up to the woman who was conscious. I told her something like, “You have to learn to let go. You can’t control everything. You are killing yourself by trying.” I then told her three things she should stop trying to control but I can’t recall them now. I realized as I was telling her these things that my problem was also trying to control everything. I knew the dream had fulfilled its purpose then and I felt myself return to my body.

Interpretation

I am transitioning (bridge). There are others relying on me (people on bridge) and the message is it is important that I cross through this stage.

I feel restricted (lake) and am exploring my emotional state (swimming). I am trying to protect myself from emotional harm (goggles) and need to confront something in my waking life that I know is hurting me. I am told the situation is not as serious as I think and to relax (penguin). My emotions will subside (receding water) and guidance will be given (killer whale). Then I can pick-up where I left off (truck). I am seeking illumination (headlights). I go in search of solutions to what is holding me back (hedge and barrier). I find a situation that is temporary (mobile home) and am shown to not let my emotions get the better of me (headache). I give myself advice about control and am told to let go of certain issues, to trust all is working out as intended.

I find it interesting that I do not take over the dream but allow it to show me what I need to see. This is not common for me. While I am allowing the dream to show me things I am also observing it and learning from it to the point that I recognize it’s lesson and end the dream when the message is received.

When I woke up the song Complicated was going through my mind – “Why do you have to go and make things so complicated?”. lol Yet I feel a part of this message is not meant for me but for someone I know in my life – “I see the way you’re acting like you’re somebody else gets me frustrated.” They spend the majority of their life acting like they are somebody else, but I know them, have seen their true self and it is frustrating to me that they continue to act like someone they aren’t to fit in. The message to both of us is to stop complicating life, to stop putting conditions on life (conditional thinking, putting conditions on people and situations), and to be true to ourselves. There is no need to pretend we are someone else. Honesty is needed.

4 OBEs, Same Theme

Slept nearly 12 hours last night! Whoa, right!? The K-Index was in and out of the yellow, too. Sometimes I sleep more with geomagnetic storms, sometimes not. Regardless, I had some dreams and a series of OBEs early this morning.

Dream: Bouncing Bullet

Dreamed of this small, bullet-sized ball that when thrown would ricochet off of everything. If it happened to hit someone, it would act like a bullet, piercing their skin and potentially killing them. Knowing this, I picked up a ball and threw it as hard as I could into the wall. It began to bounce off of everything with such speed I couldn’t track it. Someone warned me that I could die. As if to demonstrate my lack of fear, I put my hand to make sure the ball hit me and said, “I don’t care if I die.”

Interpretation

I have repressed anger (bullets) that could result in hurting someone or me. It don’t care and purposefully throw it and put myself in harm’s way. This indicates that I am reckless with my anger to the point that I am willing to accept the consequences of it no matter the end result.

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Dream: Burning Lettuce and Asparagus

In this dream I was inside a women’s prison unit. I’m not sure why I was there but I took an interest in them and began to try and get to know the inmates. One inmate asked me point blank, “Why are you being so friendly?” I said to her, “I want to get to know you better.” The feeling from her was one of distrust and animosity which was understandable. She had committed crimes, some pretty bad ones (murder), and was being punished for them. I recall feeling immense compassion for her and wanting to hug her but I didn’t because her energy was not receptive.

Then I was outside with the female inmates. They were cooking food on open grills and enjoying their temporary freedom. I looked at the grills and instead of seeing the grill with coals underneath I saw a tiny garden. In the garden there were new sprouts and they were being cooked by a fire. Half the sprouts were lettuce and half were asparagus. I was horrified that they were cooking the garden and said, “You will kill all the plants!” I saw some of the sprouts were being spared. The others had small fired burning at their base and had a roasted look. One large asparagus shoot was not on fire. I said, “I don’t like asparagus anyway.”

Interpretation

The first part of this dream is me attempting to get to know other aspects of myself, aspects that maybe I am not proud of or who have done “bad” things. My Shadow self. The second half seems to be a consideration that my hard work (garden), abundance (lettuce) and prosperity (asparagus) are being destroyed (fire) before they ever completely materialize (sprouts). I try to make less of the situation by saying I disliked prosperity (asparagus).

4 OBEs

I woke up in between the dreams from a Kundalini dream. The Kundalini had been raging in my heart chakra and I said to someone, “I can’t resist it!” When I woke up I heard, “Then embrace it.”

Then I said to my guidance, “I want to project.” Not long after I entered into the in-between and began to hear noises-off, specifically a radio playing very loudly next to my head. I experienced almost no vibrations and found it difficult to tell if I had phased (gone OOB) or not. This occurred with all 4 OBEs.

In all of the OBEs I was in my bedroom, sat up OOB, tried to exit my bedroom and then re-entered my body. Re-entry happened at the exact moment of exiting the bedroom. It appears I was being told not to leave the vicinity of my sleeping body, but I’m not sure why. Two times I tried exiting through my bedroom door. The first time I re-entered as I was opening it. The second time I had actually opened the door but had a blanket wrapped around my foot keeping me from moving. In one another attempt to exit, I tried to leave via the window but the window was closed. I opened it, removed the screen and then began to jump/fly out the window. I never passed through the threshold. Finally, I tried to get to the window again and shifted back into my body before I could even touch the window.

In 3 of the OBEs my vision was on but the room was almost pitch black. The last OBE (the one where I opened the window) my vision came on and I saw the early morning light coming in the window. I began to sing to raise my vibration but I didn’t need to. My energy level was solid. There were thoughts in this OBE that movement was taking too long. I should be able to think myself to any location I desired. I felt to be slowed down. This all became apparent as I was opening the window. I knew I should have been able to just move through it but I was forced to use it like I would in physicality.

I had similar thoughts about movement in the other OBEs but I was blocked in the same way. I had to open the door. I couldn’t just go through it. Was it belief that trapped me in my bedroom? Was it to help me see how I feel trapped in life for similar reasons? Or was it to remind me that in physical reality we can’t just jump past the hard, boring or otherwise unwanted steps, we have to move through it all?

When I awoke the song, Stay With Me, came into my mind. I recognized a feeling from the early dreams of the night. The feeling told me that there was still some work to do at deeper levels. I need to handle my resistance to life. I heard something about being a part of the collective, reminding me that I am not here for just myself. It was not an accusation of being “selfish” by any means but a reminder that there are still remnants of the Ego, or small self, that are interfering and must be handled. I saw a visual of cobwebs sticking to me. They are extremely sticky. You can pull them off only to have them stick to your hands or some other body part. I guess that’s how these last remnants of the self are, too. They just adhere to another part and are difficult to get rid of.

 

 

Preparation for Vertical Alignment and Full Exchange

Account of this morning’s Kundalini experience that I want to share with you all.

Dayna's avatarA Walk-In Life

I was approached last night by my Companion Traveler. He requested we resume our work. He did this by inserting a familiar song in my head – I Swear. Specifically he sent me the chorus: “I swear, by the moon and the stars in the sky, I’ll be there. I swear, like a shadow that’s by your side, I’ll be there…..I’ll love you with every beat of my heart, I swear.” Considering I haven’t heard that song in years (over a decade) I knew immediately where it came from and why. It’s a popular wedding song.

I was reluctant but finally agreed. My one request was that he appear to me in a different form. His normal form upset me too much.

Lucid Dream with Kundalini

Early this morning, I entered into a dream and became lucid quite quickly. My lucidity began to increase upon meeting up with a…

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Rainbows, Butterflies and Duality

A synchronicity has been presenting itself to me over and over these past couple of weeks. Usually it comes in pairs but other times it is just that I notice it briefly. The specific symbol is the rainbow.

Honestly, it has taken me a while to notice the sign. I even had a dream filled with rainbow eggs and shrugged off the symbolism of the rainbow after seeing a friend of mine from Shasta write about his own rainbow dream the very next day.

Rainbows to me equate to “the pot of gold” and “hope”. I haven’t been feeling particularly hopeful the last few weeks. In fact, I feel uninspired, unmotivated and stuck in the mud. I know this is purposeful and I am acutely aware of the Equinox portal (stargate) and the peeling away of the last remnants of the False Self, parts I seem to cling onto for dear life and are just a PITA all around. Just so happens, tomorrow is the next section of the Equinox portal as told to me by my guidance. April 7 all hell breaks loose. Or something like that. I am not shaking in my boots or anything over here. I’m in a “Whatever” shrugging my shoulders mood at the moment.

Anyway, believe-it-or-not, I think the rainbow symbol/message to me is not about a pot of gold or some “reward” for all my hard work. Actually, I believe it is more along the lines of symbolizing duality and bridging Heaven and Earth. Somehow we’ve got to straddle the razor blade of duality to find and establish our direct link to the Divine. It reminds me of the 8 winds in Buddhism and the lesson of non-attachment.

Worthy persons deserve to be called so because they are not carried away by the eight winds: prosperity, decline, disgrace, honor, praise, censure, suffering, and pleasure. They are neither elated by prosperity nor grieved by decline.

The more I internalize this lesson (which seems never-ending) the more I recognize that it is the not the attachment we are meant to avoid, nor the emotions that arise from it. Instead, non-attachment is not becoming the effect of the inevitable emotions that will arise from attachment. We breathe through the emotions, whether they be good or bad, and then allow them to pass. We let ourselves learn from the experiences and flow with them. Both “good” and “bad” are beautiful. We recognize we are the experience and do not judge our reaction. This is allowing. Attachment is part of the human condition, thus, it is part of why we became human in the first place.

It is important to be impartial towards such perceptions we receive and to determine not to be driven by emotional expressions. Our path to enlightenment will be obstructed when we assign a sense of influential authority on our feelings and on our lives by the experienced situations – rather than becoming unswayed by their impact. Source

Even more interesting is that as I am writing about the rainbow and remembering all the many synchronistic signs from it, I recall I have been seeing butterflies quite a bit, too. Then I hear part of a song and it makes me smile. “It’s not always rainbows and butterflies, its compromise that moves us along”. Duality again. 🙂

The deeper I go within, the more pockets of resistance I encounter. Resistance that I never knew existed pops up. It’s usually always resistance to those things I judge as being “bad” or “non-optimum”. Yet sometimes there is resistance toward things others would be attracted to. Resistance to success, power, self-praise. Oh how worthy yet unworthy I am all at once. So paradoxical, yet that is the point I think.

Like my friend wrote recently, we must Know the self fully before we can destroy it.

It’s a curious thing that my self has to be healed, strengthened, and built up, only to then be dissolved. (There is an old saying in spiritual practice that you must have a self before you can get rid of the self. I think this is what it refers to. You cannot have sustainable spiritual transformation without the psychological healing, otherwise you end up with a completely fractured personality.)

My guidance often reminds me to “relax and just enjoy the experience of life.” It is funny how difficult it is to do. I know I use to do it. I remember doing it in childhood. I see my own children doing it every day. It is possible to be that way yet be “grown up” and “responsible”. It is similar to being “worthy” and “unworthy” at the same time. If we can be both of those, then why not a grown-up, responsible child at heart? I like the sound of that!

So, my goal through this next portal/gateway/stargate section is to stop resisting. To stop rejecting things I perceive as “bad” to the point that experiencing them does not create a resistance reaction within, but rather an understanding and appreciation for the fleeting moment I have been given to experience duality is all its glory.

 

Problem Solving Dreams

More dreams to document. Seems like I am working through a lot of life issues and a resistance to moving forward.

Dream: Coping with the Future

Something had happened that decimated the population of the planet. I was with a group traveling through the now mostly destroyed land. We came upon an open field with flocks of chickens roaming about. There was a large barn and mill located next to it and up the hill was a college. We discussed what might have happened had the college students known the chickens were there. Likely a fight or worse. But no one was there now. The sickness had taken the people and the chickens were all that was left.

We talked about how the chickens might be infected. There were some that were very erratic. We also discussed possibly staying there but decided instead to take a couple of eggs with us.

We moved along and found a patch of earth to plant a small garden in. We buried the eggs. I’m not sure why we did this. It seemed we thought the soil (accidentally wrote “soul” here) would incubate the eggs.

Not long after someone had come through and uprooted our plants and dug up and cracked one egg. One egg was hard boiled and was eaten. The other was lost. We discovered a small group nearby and they confessed. They welcomed us in and it seemed they had a nice community going but something felt off. We went driving into the nearby town (we called it Fairbanks) and saw some groups of survivors in tattered clothing. One family, a man, wife and two kids was walking by. The man had a very tiny, black and white puppy in his hands. I smiled at him and he chased our car trying to get handouts.

Then there was an entire scene about a man needing a lawyer. They searched for one and brought in a woman who he identified as his wife who he thought had died in the outbreak. He had a new partner and so did she and there was no issue between them.

Interpretation

This dreams seems to be all about moving forward, goals and commitment to them. I am discussing my fears (chickens) and my potential (eggs). I leave the fear behind and move on to focus on my potential, hoping for growth (burying them). I feel like all my hard work (garden) is destroyed. The people I know are not who they seem to be. Help is available if I ask (lawyer).

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Dream: Parking Ticket in New York

I was invited to my mom’s but was very upset with her and gave her a piece of my mind about some things. I told her the energy was ruined and I couldn’t stay. She didn’t understand. I remember telling her, “Do you know you are spending $6k a year on them? That will be $18k in 3 years!”

I went into a side room to repaint a painting I had completed. I began to outline it but got paint all over some towels and eventually gave up because of so many mistakes. Then I saw I had been painting on the wrong side and the original painting was fine. It was a painting of the Earth from a distance with clouds and rainbows of color around it.

Then I was outside on a wooden deck. It had large holes in it where it rotted out. I was talking to my ex-in-laws about it. I ended up showing them a cool trick I could do. I believe I became pretty lucid here, almost to the point I could have taken over the dream. I was putting up my hands in front of me like hanging onto an invisible rope. Then I would let myself fall forward or backwards and it was like I was swinging on thin air. It felt really cool.

I left and went outside to drive home for the day. The scene felt different. I knew I was in N.Y., New York. It was raining outside and I opened the door to a very large, black pick-up. I got soaked in the process. Then I saw a huge sign on the front of my windshield. It said, “Do Not Leave Until You Pay.” I got out of the car (it stopped raining) and pulled off the sticker. Under it was a parking ticket. There were objects placed on my truck to keep me from driving away. I was about to get angry when I realized there was no point. The ticket was for $321 and I had to pay in order to go home.

There is a whole scene here where I seem to be going in circles. I realize I am getting nowhere once I figure it all out. I get frustrated and say aloud, “What is the point of all this! I want out!” I see in my mind a visual of two signs. The one on the left says, “Lesson 1”. The one on the right, which is double the size says, “Lesson 2”.

I wake up and I am angry.

Interpretation

The first part is again me dealing with family issues. The numbers are likely messages. 6 and 18. I am looking to recreate the picture of the situation but keep running into emotional messes (paint on towels) only to discover the painting is complete. There is a disconnect with my Self (holes in deck) being addressed. I am being advised to fully Trust that all is working out as it should (invisible rope section of dream). I am seeking to go Home (leaving from work). I see my life experience – work (the truck) – as negative (black). There is emotion with this (rain). I feel unable to move forward and lost (parking ticket). The number 321 is likely a message in and of itself. I can’t go Home until I finish what I started. The message “Do not leave until you pay” is a direct message. I am shown how cycles repeat and also given another direct message that I have two lessons that need to be learned.