Category Archives: Ascension

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A Lesson on Choice

Lately I have come to receive guidance in the form of quick “downloads” unlike the downloads I have experienced in the past. They are super fast, seamlessly streaming information in the form of complete Knowingness that comes into my Being and then seems to have always been there. It is as if the download is not a download at all but more of an activation of cellular memory. The experience of it is hard to describe but one minute I am without memory and the next filled with it. Then I am left to process what I now Know, which is not always easy considering the information does not come in words.

What I am noticing with increasing frequency is that when these activations of memory occur they are received as instructions. Let me clarify – There is no one telling me I am to do anything. Quite the opposite. It is more of an urgency toward certain action that results. This is not a compulsion, either. I have felt compelled in the past, so I know that is not what the feeling is. It is more of a soul guidance, something that stems from the core of my very Being.

After yesterday’s messages I spent most of my day viewing a potential future path from the vantage point of the Observer. What is interesting to me is that although this future path has many unknowns, unknowns that would normally scare me, I felt no trepidation whatsoever. My viewpoint was and still is that I am willing to experience anything and so as such there is no fear, expectation, anticipation or otherwise connected to this potential future and all avenues it could take.

By the end of the day I was reminded that I am not without choice in the matter of my life and my future. Though I may have this soul guidance occurring, I can still choose. So, I announced that I preferred to keep things as they are, that I am happy with how they are and that I feel the choice outcomes would be more beneficial to all in the long-run. I fell asleep happy and quite content with my decision, too.

ginger

Dreams

My dreams last night indicate that I was mulling over my decision. I had a long dream where I was searching for my car (life path), the Prius (current life path), and could not find it. Someone stole it (feel like the path is being taken away) and another car was being presented to me as mine (new direction). A black sports type car (the unknown). I was rejecting it and upset that my Prius was gone.

In another dream I went on a date with a portly young man still in high school. I was aware that I was way older than him but that they all believed I was 18. Their house was interesting. They had two sets of fences (barriers) inside their living area (family). The fence was partial and in the way. I also recall a part of the dream where I was taking 2-liter bottles of soda that were attached at the middle and cutting them in half (disconnecting from a part of myself). I then put cellophane over the one on the left and stuck it into a deep freeze (suppression). I never drank the one on the right.

Then there was a dream where I was at this farm house. There were tall, chain link fences around it (feeling fenced in) but I could get in and out at certain openings (only certain exits). I watched as the owner and his family harvested their crop – ginger (security and comfort). It was in rows (feeling reserved). The plant itself looked like tall grass (reliance, security). Cows (dependence and family) came after and ate the ginger. I remember wondering why they would let cows eat their crop like that.

Still yet in another dream I had driven to the beach (transition between spiritual/physical) and parked. I ended up in the water (emotion) and a wave came and washed me out toward a small waterfall (letting go). I went under the water where I saw clearly hundreds of small, starfish (decisions) shaped sponges (over dependency on others). They were pink and sparkled (attractive to me). When I touched them though they shocked me horribly (sudden awareness) and so I tried to avoid them. Someone was talking to me while I swam showing me where to go to avoid being shocked. When I made it to the surface there was a man waiting. I found that he had taken my white convertible (power) for a joy ride. He left all my stuff, though, even a large amount of cash (quest for love/power). He had a convertible of his own only it was black (unknown path). I remember climbing into it (making a choice) and asking why he didn’t take my stuff and being very firm with him about his decision to steal my car.

Message

When I awoke I had an odd feeling that is hard to describe. I then saw a vision of a ticket, like to go to a show. The end tab was torn, so the ticket was “validated”. The ticket itself said, “Skyrocket” and had an image of a rocket taking off. When I saw it I knew the message was I was about to skyrocket. For some reason I did not see this as a positive message but as more of a fateful one. I knew that despite my deciding to stick with the life I have, to enjoy it and the security it offered, things were about to shift and the direction they would take me would propel me with great velocity.

It seems that the message is, “Yes you always have a choice but sometimes the choice is already made for you by your Self. In such cases the self has little or no say in the events that follow. The choice then is to resist or allow. So in this sense there is choice, though it may not seem so.”

The message continued with:

This life experience is a joint effort between Self and self. The Self is the path-paver. The self then walks the paved path, partaking in what the path has to offer along the way. The self perceives as it chooses. It creates the weather, chooses the pit stops and the company it keeps. The Self then adjusts the path it is paving to accommodate the self’s choices because sometimes the self wanders in circles or ends up going backward. In such cases a “dead end” will be constructed and other detours created to get the self back on the desired path. In a sense, the self can seem to be blindfolded in that it does not always see the path it is on as it was paved. This is where perception comes into play. If the Self has good working control of the self, as it should, there will be no blindfold but a good sense of where the path is and how to follow it.

You might think that I would wake in a bad mood because of a message like this. It seems to be saying, “Sorry, but you really have no say in this matter. The path has been chosen and now you get to walk it.” In the past I may have argued this with great gusto, saying, “You wanna bet? I will show you!” Ha!

Now I am more like, “Okay. I understand. I see my options clearly. I can choose to avoid, resist, and complicate the path ahead. Or I can choose to allow and follow it to where it leads me. I know that I may not like what lies ahead. I know that the path is likely to take me through desolate territory, through rugged terrain and into uncharted territory. I also know that it will take me through fields of green, snow topped mountains and beautiful beaches. The good thing is that the path has been paved and so I don’t have to worry about it being there. I can trust that it is. This is a huge relief. I don’t have to figure it all out by myself. All I have to do is follow what is already there.”

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Messages: Ezekiel and Echelon

I awoke in tears again this morning from dreams that should not have brought on tears. I am at a loss. The feeling of grief is so strong and so real yet I have no idea where it is coming from. It is like I am purging someone else’s emotions and issues.

The dreams I had could be a part of the emotion but it is hard to say. Rather than go into detail about them I will say it appears that I was discussing specific issues on Earth. Specifically the issues I recall covering were education and politics. One conversation I had with someone was about children refusing to participate in the education system – refusing to go to school, refusing to do their lessons – outright rebellion of anything and everything related to the education mandate. This rebellion was widespread resulting in empty classrooms and an increase in petty crime and vandalism. A woman was asking me for my help and opinion on what to do about it. I said something that surprised me. I said,”Let them rebel. When we tie education to citizenship they will change their minds. The uneducated cannot participate or have a say in their own government.” Another dream was also about education and the struggle of teens in the education system. It was like an overview of why the teens began to rebel. They felt unsafe and unable to do anything about it.

Yet when I awoke it was not the dreams themselves that incited the emotion but instead a feeling that Earth was a total mess and could not be salvaged. A feeling that some major changes were on the horizon. Upheaval, destruction, war, plague, etc. Not all at once but it felt like something drastic had to be done as a “reset” and so it would be done because it was the only way.

I am not sure why I am being pummeled with this emotion, this intense grief. It is as if I am being briefed on the state of the planet, at least that is how it felt this morning. My own issues do not seem to be the source of what I am feeling right now.

I heard last night as I was drifting to sleep, “You do not have a past anymore. You have only a future.” And this morning, the messages that came through added to the mysteriousness of last night’s message. I heard, “Adzekiel”. This is a name I have heard before and I recognized it. Though I cannot find Adzekiel online as an angel, I know the name represents the angel Ezekiel, the angel of transformation. Adzekiel is also mentioned in this blog in February, 2016,

As I began to drift back to sleep I saw a birthday cake with candles and saw a 23. This reminded me of my husband’s birthday, May 23. He will be out of town that day, though. Why was I being shown this?

Of course this brought me out of the dream and into the in-between where I entered into a moving vision. In it I saw what appeared to be streamers of light traveling from space to Earth. Their source appeared to be a ship but it was on the edge of my vision and my focus was on the streamers of Light. When I saw them I thought, “Starseeds”. There were thousands of them. I thought, “I am one of them.” Then I was brought out of the in-between when I heard, “The Echelons are awaiting your arrival.”

This morning I was curious so Googled echelon as soon as I could. I stumbled upon this article: An Explanation of the Order of Melchizedek.  When I read the first few paragraphs and got to the part that said the first echelon is known as the “Clarion Call” I knew this article was meant for me to read. Too many syncs for me to dismiss it.

The entire first echelon is called the “Clarion Call” -the call to the heart. It bears witness to the large number of souls awakening at this time to bring forth the fruit of man’s potential. Levels one through six in this echelon are for those who “get” that there is something to this spiritual awakening process within them. These individuals have committed to looking further within themselves for more. Levels six through nine recognize the power of the clarion call and what it truly means. These neophytes commit themselves entirely in service to the clarion call for humanity. Levels nine through twelve know there is no turning back. These initiates completely dedicate their lives to fulfilling their potential of becoming “Godman” or an Ascended Master.

Not only have I received the message “Clarion Call” several times but I have also felt it and its power. I have also received the message about reaching a “point of no return” and been told many times, “There is no turning back.” Ha!

Echelon two is as they say “another ball of wax entirely”. The first three levels that are presently available to be initiated into are guaranteed to bring up all your survival issues. The first level is called The Gate. This initiation will bring up all your demons that your thoughts and emotions subconsciously create. The second level is called the Red Feather of Courage. To be initiated into this level you must have the courage and be willing to stand firm in service for God. Expect to be shunned, ignored, and ridiculed for your good deeds. The third level is called the Floor of Malkuth. Here you must symbolically be able to stand equally on the black tiles as the white. What this means is that the initiate must so profoundly master their thoughts and emotions, all levels of good and bad or evil become equalized and divine. Again, in this initiation you can expect all illusions of what you believe to be bad will manifest in your life to be re-qualified. To pass this level, you will need to see only good, at all times.

I am not sure I want to visit echelon two, especially the first level, “The Gate”. Would you? lol

Of course the echelons could be a group or fleet of ships as is one of the definitions – a formation of troops, ships, aircraft, or vehicles in parallel rows with the end of each row projecting further than the one in front. But who knows. I sometimes wish that these strange messages would be withheld from me.

Back to the angel Ezekiel. This is the second morning that the name came to mind when I awoke. I understand that I am in the midst of a powerful transformation and I can feel change approaching. I have also received messages to that extent, specifically angel number 53 most recently number 25. I even had a profound Knowing to expect major upheaval in my life soon; that all things related to my current identity will be dismantled one by one. Ouch!

To receive these messages and profound Knowing is not easy nor preferred. Like the article about Ezekiel says: “Change is at times an overwhelming concept. If you let go of something even if you are not happy with it, then what will happen? The unknown causes many people to become stuck, to freeze in place even though they do not like where they are. They would rather be unhappy than face the unknown.” These words describe me in a nutshell – frozen in place, choosing to stay the same rather than venture into the unknown.

No wonder I am waking up in grief all the time. Look at what I am being prepared for!

 

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Molting

Sorry I’ve been so quiet. I’ve been struggling through an intense physical and emotional purging these last six days or so. It all was building up prior to that but got especially intense around May 1st.

As I mentioned previously, I have been struggling with a string of illnesses. First a lingering head cold (which is STILL lingering) and then intestinal complications that stretched out for days. Well, that wasn’t the end of it. My entire family got a nasty stomach bug. It started with my son Sunday night and on Tuesday the rest of us got it one-by-one within hours of each other. I had naively thought I was immune, assuming I was the one who gave it to the rest of the family so was surprised when I came down with it.

Every time I get the stomach bug I think it is the worst. The last time I had it I was five months pregnant with my youngest (over 3 years ago). Pregnant with the stomach bug is awful and potentially dangerous. I thought at the time it was the worst I had ever felt. Well, I was wrong. This hit me so hard and so violently that I nearly passed out. Twice. I was sweating profusely, my head felt ice cold, I couldn’t see and when I could see the room was spinning and I couldn’t judge distance properly. It literally seemed at the time that I was about to be sucked into an abyss where death was awaiting me. And then after the vomiting stage was over I was extremely weak to the point that walking a few steps would incite dizziness, rapid heartbeat, and breathlessness.

Through all of it I was still coughing, courtesy of the ever-lingering cold that doesn’t go away.

To top it all I got an awful sore throat the day after the stomach bug. Thankfully that has now subsided.

Amidst all of this illness I went through a gauntlet of emotional upheaval. Mostly the emotional purging occurred during sleep. I would wake up crying, sometimes multiple times in one night, from dreams that often disappeared as soon as I tried to recall them. If I did recall them, the dreams were confusing or linked to past experiences that I thought I had long put behind me.

To top it all off, the Kundalini has been active. This time, however, it has been painful, or at least what I recall of it has been. It started out with just some energy fluctuations and surges. Then I got sick. Since the stomach flu I have now had two instances where I have experienced pain from the Kundalini energy. It feels like someone sticks their hand into a chakra and then twists forcefully. The specific areas of this pain are the root, sacral and solar plexus.

This is the first time I have had physical illness mixed in with an intense emotional purging. The two together are extreme but not as bad as last November and December.

On to the Next Section – The Molt

So what is going on? This is the Reset I wrote about last week. Clearing out lingering blockages in preparation for whatever comes next. All of the emotional purging is to clear away the last vestiges of the False Self. Those patterns, beliefs and falsehoods that are the basis of the illusory reality it clings to. And man oh man am I ever hanging on.

This is also the result of the next section of the Equinox Portal that is available to us through mid-summer. I am told there are two in this month alone, with the third opening just as May ends and June begins. One right after the other. I am not sure I can handle it if it is more of what I just went though, though. This is intense! Yet I know it needs to be this intense to release the vice grip of the False Self. I see an image of a hand holding tightly to something and another hand releasing the grip finger by finger.

All in all I feel like I am in my death throes. I wake up most mornings thinking, “I am dying.” I even had a dream where I was in a hospital talking to a nurse whose job it was to educate the dying on the death process. WTF right!? During the day I often feel like my body is dying, too. It is a very real feeling but then at the same time I am not concerned one bit. Totally accepting of whatever fate awaits me. It is like I am molting, shedding my human skin.

 

Trooper

Me and my dog Trooper in December 2002.

 

Dreams

Here are some examples of the dreams I’ve been having, the ones I have recalled that is:

I am my sister talking to my mother. I am telling her I can’t stay very long and I only came to check-in and see how everyone is doing. I am asked to stay and I begin to cry. I wake up crying and feeling as if I am dying from the inside out.

I am with my aunt in a darkened library. I am crying and hysterical. I ask her to help me. I say, “Why is he here? I just want him to go away and leave me alone. Make him go away!” She says, “Remember when I visited 10 weeks ago? It was nice, wasn’t it?” I stop crying and smile and say, “Yes, it was.” Then I return to crying. I feel beside myself with angst. I wake up in tears. My pillow is soaked.

I was inside a car with someone who I couldn’t see but knew was a woman. There was a tiny brown snake that resembled a large worm in the crease of the seat. Then there were many little worm-like snakes all over. I knew they were extremely poisonous so was using scientific-looking tongs to pick them off one-by-one.

I was sitting on my bed clearing dirt off of it with my hands. I noticed my dog Trooper in the room. I went up to him and hugged him close. He felt skinny and fragile. He stared into my eyes for a long time and I knew he was communicating with me. He was telling me he was sick, that he didn’t feel good and that it was time for him to go (to die).” I hugged him close again and thought, “It’s okay if you want to go. I will be alright.” But instead I looked into his eyes and said, “Thank you for being my companion.”

I woke up crying but understood that this was him showing me that in life he had also stared at me and communicated the same message. I had given him what he wanted. Sometimes when we think we are hurting another we are actually helping them.

 

 

fidgetspinner

Fidget Spinner in action. See the Vesica Pisces? 

 

Signs and Symbols

Angel number 53 – Received over a week ago. Preparing me for “change” and “major life challenges”.
Angel number 250 – Received this morning. Unexpected good is coming from unexpected sources.
Dead Dove – Received before stomach flu (May 1st). A dove flew into bedroom window and died on the spot. Symbol of lost love, endings.
Vesica Pisces – Kids got Fidget Spinners. When I played with one I saw it formed a Vesica Pisces and knew it was a message.
Sun and Moon – Seeing the sun and moon right next to each other in the sky.
11, 111, & 1111 – A near constant right now, especially 11 and 111.

 

 

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Sick Again

My cold is still not completely gone and now I have some kind of awful stomach/intestinal virus. Maybe. Not sure what the hell it is or if it is even a virus. It feels like my stomach right below my ribs is getting kicked and it is nearly always aching. The pain arches upward toward my chest in a crescent shape and then hits my lower heart chakra. This started yesterday morning and has just gotten progressively worse pain-wise. My heart chakra even aches, which is really odd.

I’ve never had a stomach virus affect me this way. The closest I can recall is that I was sick way back in 2006 with a stomach virus that just made my tummy hurt and cramp all the time without any other symptoms. It lasted so long I went to the doctor, which is unheard of for me, and was told it was a virus that lasted up to two weeks and was told to take Mylanta which did absolutely nothing.

Whatever is going on I don’t think it is coincidence nor do I think my immune system is compromised or anything like that. I was told recently by my guidance that I needed to “rest” and I do rest, but probably not enough. I went to the gym even when I still felt pretty sick with the cold. I left early, though, and have taken it easy since then. Exercise makes me feel better usually so I opt to do it even when sick most of the time because it will lessen the symptoms temporarily giving me relief (cold symptoms especially). But this cramping stomach will definitely keep me inactive. Even walking to the park with my kids made it hurt more. 😦

Interestingly, the pain in my stomach was preceded by several mornings where eating breakfast was making me feel queasy. I ignored it, though, assuming it was my cold causing the queasiness.

Several others I know online are mentioning trouble in the same area that has been going on for a week. I also noticed others with the full-blown stomach flu. One friend asked me if it was a dietary change thing because those are the changes she is being asked to make. It reminded me of a message I received this morning. I heard “liquid diet” out of the blue. Yesterday I momentarily thought I needed to fix some things about my diet but ignored the message. Yet this morning I did opt for oatmeal over eggs and likely won’t eat much until this cramping crap passes.

So, I’m guessing this is just a warning to focus more on what I put into my stomach. I will likely get out my juicer and make more kitchari (Ayurvedic diet) and avoid meat. Sigh. I really like meat.

I am pretty tired of being sick by now as you can guess. These illnesses seem to put all my spiritual experiences on hold and have made dreamtime pretty boring because I am too tired to remember or care. This stomach trouble would not be so bad if I weren’t still coughing all the time and my nose was not still running incessantly. If this is chakra clearing then I must be clearing all of them except my root and crown!

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Psalm 37

Happy Easter everyone! I hope you have a beautiful day with positive interactions with friends and family.

I wanted to share with you a message I received this morning. I simply heard, “Slom 37” which I knew meant “Psalm 37”. The “Slom” was immediately understood to mean “sloth” (laziness).

If you read my post yesterday, then you know a little about the family drama surrounding my sister’s family. I believe this message was meant to help me manage my own reactions to this drama.

Psalm 37 basically gives advice on how to respond when we see undeserving people get rewarded for doing the “wrong” thing. Here’s an explanation of the meaning. In this case, it was sent to me because my sister and her husband fit in this category. The “sloth” part of the message refers to both of them. They choose either not to work or work very little hours in order to receive Welfare benefits from the government. My cousin (her husband) won’t work a normal job because his checks will get garnished by both the state and the IRS for back child support and taxes. My sister works a part-time job to keep her earnings low so she can be eligible for state aid as well. They rely on handouts from family and create their situation purposefully and with full knowledge of what they are doing. My sister even told me outright she was “learning how to work the system” after she got out of prison and planned to get pregnant because a child brings more free benefits. Everyone in my family is aware of this, even my mom, but my mom enables them far more than she should. Their child, her grandson, is mainly the reason and my sister and her husband recognize and exploit this.

This is just the short version. If everything I just wrote infuriates you, then you know how I felt for a long time. There is so much more, but I wrote all of the above without upset or annoyance. I know this is the lesson they came here to learn and it is also a lesson for me. Prior to coming into this life, the last memory I have of the Other Side is looking down at the Earth below and knowing my sister was already in life and needed me.

Psalm 37 from the King James version of the Bible:

Fret not thyself because of evildoers, neither be thou envious against the workers of iniquity.

2 For they shall soon be cut down like the grass, and wither as the green herb.

3 Trust in the Lord, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed.

4 Delight thyself also in the Lord: and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.

5 Commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass.

6 And he shall bring forth thy righteousness as the light, and thy judgment as the noonday.

7 Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for him: fret not thyself because of him who prospereth in his way, because of the man who bringeth wicked devices to pass.

8 Cease from anger, and forsake wrath: fret not thyself in any wise to do evil.

9 For evildoers shall be cut off: but those that wait upon the Lord, they shall inherit the earth.

10 For yet a little while, and the wicked shall not be: yea, thou shalt diligently consider his place, and it shall not be.

11 But the meek shall inherit the earth; and shall delight themselves in the abundance of peace.

12 The wicked plotteth against the just, and gnasheth upon him with his teeth.

13 The Lord shall laugh at him: for he seeth that his day is coming.

14 The wicked have drawn out the sword, and have bent their bow, to cast down the poor and needy, and to slay such as be of upright conversation.

15 Their sword shall enter into their own heart, and their bows shall be broken.

16 A little that a righteous man hath is better than the riches of many wicked.

17 For the arms of the wicked shall be broken: but the Lord upholdeth the righteous.

18 The Lord knoweth the days of the upright: and their inheritance shall be for ever.

19 They shall not be ashamed in the evil time: and in the days of famine they shall be satisfied.

20 But the wicked shall perish, and the enemies of the Lord shall be as the fat of lambs: they shall consume; into smoke shall they consume away.

21 The wicked borroweth, and payeth not again: but the righteous sheweth mercy, and giveth.

22 For such as be blessed of him shall inherit the earth; and they that be cursed of him shall be cut off.

23 The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord: and he delighteth in his way.

24 Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down: for the Lord upholdeth him with his hand.

25 I have been young, and now am old; yet have I not seen the righteous forsaken, nor his seed begging bread.

26 He is ever merciful, and lendeth; and his seed is blessed.

27 Depart from evil, and do good; and dwell for evermore.

28 For the Lord loveth judgment, and forsaketh not his saints; they are preserved for ever: but the seed of the wicked shall be cut off.

29 The righteous shall inherit the land, and dwell therein for ever.

30 The mouth of the righteous speaketh wisdom, and his tongue talketh of judgment.

31 The law of his God is in his heart; none of his steps shall slide.

32 The wicked watcheth the righteous, and seeketh to slay him.

33 The Lord will not leave him in his hand, nor condemn him when he is judged.

34 Wait on the Lord, and keep his way, and he shall exalt thee to inherit the land: when the wicked are cut off, thou shalt see it.

35 I have seen the wicked in great power, and spreading himself like a green bay tree.

36 Yet he passed away, and, lo, he was not: yea, I sought him, but he could not be found.

37 Mark the perfect man, and behold the upright: for the end of that man is peace.

38 But the transgressors shall be destroyed together: the end of the wicked shall be cut off.

39 But the salvation of the righteous is of the Lord: he is their strength in the time of trouble.

40 And the Lord shall help them, and deliver them: he shall deliver them from the wicked, and save them, because they trust in him.

download (1)Guidance

My take on Psalm 37 is that it is reminding us that our purpose here is not to judge others but to help them and assist them in their life lessons whatever they may be. To remember there is much more going on “behind the scenes” of life than we are meant to know. Often these “injustices” are meant to teach us about ourselves and how to love unconditionally. To have compassion in our hearts for everyone equally. To view life from the perspective of another. This is extremely hard to do with family. We have history with them, a history of doing wrong to them and them doing wrong to us. A history of hurt feelings, guilt, jealousy and more. This doesn’t even include the karma from other lifetimes either. The key is to somehow wade through all of the above and center ourselves in the love we feel for our family member. We may think, “I don’t love them. I hate them!” but ultimately, at the root of all of the emotional charge related to our relationship with them there is love. You cannot feel so much and carry so much emotional baggage for someone you don’t love. If we can contact that love and stay centered in it all of the baggage falls to the side and compassion, support and well wishes reign.

What helps me the most is to remember that the other person is choosing this for a reason and I have no control over what they choose. For example, yesterday my husband was going to take my two youngest in a convertible to go swimming with the top down. I insisted he put the top up because my youngest would likely stand up and I had all kinds of fears arise about him flying out the back of the car while it was on the highway. My husband agreed after much resistance. I stayed home and nearly burst into tears right after. My Companion reminded me, “It is not in your hands. It is his (my son’s) choice.” I knew this was true. No matter what I did, it was his choice to live or die. My Companion then said to me, “You’ve lost many babies but you won’t lose this one.” I knew he was telling the truth but regardless it was hard to get my emotions under control. We love our children so much and we think we are keeping them safe, we find comfort in that. But ultimately this is an illusion we create to help ourselves feel safe. They are choosing each moment of each day of their life, not us. It is hard to find comfort in that sometimes, but with trust it is possible. It is the same with our friends and family members who constantly make life choices that create problems for them. We see it, but they don’t, and we want to protect them from themselves. But we can’t. It is not our place nor our lesson. Our lesson is how to learn to let go and allow them their choice and consequence, good or bad.

 

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Streamlining the Self

Update you all might be interested in. Thanks for reading! ❤

Dayna's avatarA Walk-In Life

Integration is almost complete and I am noticing a substantial difference in myself. I have been told for longer than I can recall, “You are changing.” I have noticed this and that along the way, but currently there are so many changes I am noticing that it is mind boggling. I am so different than I use to be in so many ways. It seems miraculous, but it isn’t.

My Companion says it is the result of “streamlining the Self”.

Streamline definition from Dictionary.com:

1. a teardrop line of contour offering the least possible resistance to a current of air, water, etc.
2. the path of a particle that is flowing steadily and without turbulence in a fluid past an object……..
4. to alter in order to make more efficient or simple.

The Discussion

After waking this morning I recalled that there was discussion in my dreams of all the progress I had made…

View original post 1,797 more words

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Portal Section Theme: Form Follows Function

We are three days into the second section of the Equinox portal that opened up on April 7th. So far, I have not noticed any significant differences from the first section except a smoothing out of the energies and a rise in Kundalini energy. The Kundalini fluctuations may or may not be a part of your individual experiences, however.

Much work continues in the dreamstate. Deeper, more prolong periods of slumber accompany this section of the portal. During waking hours there is more immersion in 3D life, more focus and enjoyment of those things which previously there was disinterest or no motivation toward.

As a theme for this section I am led to the principal of “form follows function”. This is a principal used in architecture but it also has applications in Biology. “Form follows function” means that “structures are formed in direct correlation to what they are meant to do.” All the work we have been doing, all the healing, purging, integration, acceleration and accommodation of new energies, it has all been to update and bring into alignment our “form”. Form here does not only refer to our biological form, this is also applicable, but also to our energetic structure. We have been making adjustment to our “form” so that we can fulfill our “function” here, whatever that function may be. Function = mission. We are now at the point where we can begin our work and fulfill our intended mission(s) here.

Not all of us are ready yet. Our form must be tweaked and calibrated, adjustments may still be needed before we are 100% ready to jump into action. Action here doesn’t necessarily mean we are to make drastic, overnight change.  Though some of us may feel a near compulsion to do so, it is not advised. Think of this time period as a trial run where we try out our new form, get use to it and make adjustments to our lives to accommodate it.

Thus, the focus on 3D life again. We can’t know the exact applications (and implications) of our new form without taking it for a test drive in 3D. Yes, we have had many similar periods of more focus on 3D life, but this one is different. There will be less resistance, less fear and less internal conflict this time. Less doesn’t mean “none”, though. It all depends on your individual progress and readiness.

For me, personally, I am surprising myself. This weekend I have been extra busy and focused on 3D life. The most out-of-character thing I did was spontaneously invite my BIL’s and their families over for BBQ. I did this without taking to my husband first. Usually he is the social one and does the invites with resistance from me. Similarly, I let my daughter’s friend sleepover and took them shopping, buying them matching shirts. All the while my husband was putting in a new sprinkler line (my idea) and there was mud and mess going through my kitchen and living area. Total chaos that didn’t trigger me like usual. Finally, I decided to stop worrying over a large debt my husband and I owe, announcing to him that I was fine with us just paying the interest over time and that I was not going to stress over it anymore. Ha!

It is the focus on 3D that will help us to notice that we have changed and for the better. It also helps us see where we have more work to do.

 

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Spirals within Spirals

Woke this morning with scattered memories of very detail-oriented dreams about the life continuum. I was working specifically with a symbol. I wish I could recall it now, but in the dream I was holding it and scrutinizing it. It was small, about the size of a fifty-cent piece, silver and mostly rectangular in shape.

What I brought back was Knowing that the spiral of life is much more complex than I ever could have imagined. I saw spirals within spirals that doubled back on themselves creating a circuit of extremes. It would be like the infinity symbol made of spirals – no ending and no beginning. One section would have much more distance between the points on the spiral, making the spiral-circle appear lopsided. All of these spirals contained within them lifetimes. Not just one lifetime but lifetimes – plural. However, one spiral contained a particular life theme or lesson meant to be learned within the spirals of lifetimes contained within it.

All of these spirals within spirals seemed to double back on themselves, returning to the point of origination, or the point on the spiral where the concept of the experience first “split” and then split again and again and so on. Whatever the concept was, it would expand into so many versions of itself that the spirals multiplied exponentially.

The symbol that I mentioned earlier represents one concept on one spiral of experiences within a larger spiral of experience. My scrutiny of it was similar to how a researcher looks at the results of an experiment. The feeling was that I was seeking a specific result and would make adjustments in order to get to the end result I wanted. Each adjustment resulted in a new spiral. That end result ultimately is a return to the original concept, a full-circle from initial conception to complete maturation through experiential means.

When I woke up and had this information in my mind I was a bit overwhelmed. It felt as if I had spent the night in a laboratory discussing scientific subjects beyond my human ability to comprehend.

When I attempted to recall the dream that went with this Knowing I received back a reminder of a movie I watched a couple of weeks ago. The movie is called, The Discovery.

You will have to watch the movie to get how it helps to explain the information I brought back from dreamtime. It provides more of an understanding of how the spirals might look from a human, experiential perspective, though.

At this point in my spiritual evolution I have learned when to stop trying to understand something that is way beyond my human ability to comprehend. This is one of those times. I have to trust that at some level this process, of which life plays a part, is purposeful and that I understand and choose to participate in it.

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Rainbows, Butterflies and Duality

A synchronicity has been presenting itself to me over and over these past couple of weeks. Usually it comes in pairs but other times it is just that I notice it briefly. The specific symbol is the rainbow.

Honestly, it has taken me a while to notice the sign. I even had a dream filled with rainbow eggs and shrugged off the symbolism of the rainbow after seeing a friend of mine from Shasta write about his own rainbow dream the very next day.

Rainbows to me equate to “the pot of gold” and “hope”. I haven’t been feeling particularly hopeful the last few weeks. In fact, I feel uninspired, unmotivated and stuck in the mud. I know this is purposeful and I am acutely aware of the Equinox portal (stargate) and the peeling away of the last remnants of the False Self, parts I seem to cling onto for dear life and are just a PITA all around. Just so happens, tomorrow is the next section of the Equinox portal as told to me by my guidance. April 7 all hell breaks loose. Or something like that. I am not shaking in my boots or anything over here. I’m in a “Whatever” shrugging my shoulders mood at the moment.

Anyway, believe-it-or-not, I think the rainbow symbol/message to me is not about a pot of gold or some “reward” for all my hard work. Actually, I believe it is more along the lines of symbolizing duality and bridging Heaven and Earth. Somehow we’ve got to straddle the razor blade of duality to find and establish our direct link to the Divine. It reminds me of the 8 winds in Buddhism and the lesson of non-attachment.

Worthy persons deserve to be called so because they are not carried away by the eight winds: prosperity, decline, disgrace, honor, praise, censure, suffering, and pleasure. They are neither elated by prosperity nor grieved by decline.

The more I internalize this lesson (which seems never-ending) the more I recognize that it is the not the attachment we are meant to avoid, nor the emotions that arise from it. Instead, non-attachment is not becoming the effect of the inevitable emotions that will arise from attachment. We breathe through the emotions, whether they be good or bad, and then allow them to pass. We let ourselves learn from the experiences and flow with them. Both “good” and “bad” are beautiful. We recognize we are the experience and do not judge our reaction. This is allowing. Attachment is part of the human condition, thus, it is part of why we became human in the first place.

It is important to be impartial towards such perceptions we receive and to determine not to be driven by emotional expressions. Our path to enlightenment will be obstructed when we assign a sense of influential authority on our feelings and on our lives by the experienced situations – rather than becoming unswayed by their impact. Source

Even more interesting is that as I am writing about the rainbow and remembering all the many synchronistic signs from it, I recall I have been seeing butterflies quite a bit, too. Then I hear part of a song and it makes me smile. “It’s not always rainbows and butterflies, its compromise that moves us along”. Duality again. 🙂

The deeper I go within, the more pockets of resistance I encounter. Resistance that I never knew existed pops up. It’s usually always resistance to those things I judge as being “bad” or “non-optimum”. Yet sometimes there is resistance toward things others would be attracted to. Resistance to success, power, self-praise. Oh how worthy yet unworthy I am all at once. So paradoxical, yet that is the point I think.

Like my friend wrote recently, we must Know the self fully before we can destroy it.

It’s a curious thing that my self has to be healed, strengthened, and built up, only to then be dissolved. (There is an old saying in spiritual practice that you must have a self before you can get rid of the self. I think this is what it refers to. You cannot have sustainable spiritual transformation without the psychological healing, otherwise you end up with a completely fractured personality.)

My guidance often reminds me to “relax and just enjoy the experience of life.” It is funny how difficult it is to do. I know I use to do it. I remember doing it in childhood. I see my own children doing it every day. It is possible to be that way yet be “grown up” and “responsible”. It is similar to being “worthy” and “unworthy” at the same time. If we can be both of those, then why not a grown-up, responsible child at heart? I like the sound of that!

So, my goal through this next portal/gateway/stargate section is to stop resisting. To stop rejecting things I perceive as “bad” to the point that experiencing them does not create a resistance reaction within, but rather an understanding and appreciation for the fleeting moment I have been given to experience duality is all its glory.

 

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Magnetics and Duality

Wow. Did you see the geomagnetic storm!? This one is a doozie. When they get up above 5 then I normally get physical symptoms – headache, stomach issues, lethargy and/or insomnia. This time I am getting more anger thrown at me. Sigh.

planetary-k-index

The anger thrown my way was in my dreams this time. I had a very active night of dreams but this particular one woke me up.

Dream: Anger from a Friend

I was traveling with a friend toward the mountains. We stopped at a restaurant where we were told that they were trying to rid it of a nasty rat infestation. I saw a man go into the basement portion to look for it. It was cluttered with boxes and crates and I saw the rat running behind the mess. I believe the rat was white.  I don’t know if the man got him. All I remember is seeing a man dressed in work clothing with a hardhat and a flashlight going in after the rat.

We waited in the parking lot which was facing a the mountains. I noticed there was snow on the ground and decided to take pictures of it with my phone. I wanted to send it to a good friend of mine. I recall taking a selfie and I did not look like I do in waking life. I had long, medium brown hair and was quite pretty. I made sure to send that pic to my friend because it had a beautiful shot of the mountains in it.

Then I was in the car jabbering away happily with my friend. I was so happy that we were reunited and wanted to catch up. My friend was silent most of the time while I talked. I recalled discussing all the spiritual things I had been going through and how I felt I was recovering and finally making progress. I remember asking my friend, “Did you go through all that, too?” My friend nodded and I replied, “Oh good! I was starting to think I was nuts.” Then my friend sent a wave of anger and irritation toward me along with an audible sigh that indicated disinterest and annoyance.  Images were thrown at me all at once. I knew the images represented what my friend was focusing on currently. The images were of politics and 3D world things. I saw an image of someone trail running as well as some images that must have come from the media, but I can’t recall them now. My friend said more but the energy and images were enough to cause me to recoil in surprise. This was not a typical response from this particular friend, a friend whom I cherished dearly and would do anything for. In fact, I had only received similar energy once before but it was not prolonged like this. My friend was obviously immersed in 3D world issues and did not want to be bothered with my spiritual excitement.

I woke up suddenly from the backlash of energy. I asked my guidance what was going on and received an answer, “Your friend wants you to move on.” Move on? I didn’t understand. Whatever the problem, though, it was obvious that my presence was not wanted at this time, whether it be physical or spiritual. It saddened me but then I remembered the current intense energies and shrugged off the experience, returning to sleep.

Magnetics and Duality

The rest of the night I had dreams about the dualistic nature of physical reality.  Rather than go into detail about all the dreams, I will relate what my understanding was of the messages being sent via the dreamstate.

First I was shown the Earth positioned between Venus and Mars. In physical location the planet Earth is positioned between two polar opposites – Venus the Goddess of Love and Mars the God of War. How appropriate. And purposeful.

Then I was shown how duality came into being. I saw an image in my mind of a dark mass of energy. I understood this to represent the state of being Whole and pure potential yet to be tapped into. Then the mass began to split in two. A brilliant spark of light resulted for an instant and what was left behind were two distinct masses of energy. Two individual but Whole masses of pure potential.

When this division occurred, duality came into being. There was an entire lesson on the physics of this division but it is lost to me now. In summary, the division created all the forces of the physical universe. Most of the information I received had to do with magnets and how they worked. Essentially, it was relayed to me that all one had to do was change the polarity of a magnetic from North to South to affect what it attracts and repels. So if a magnetic’s polarity is North it will attract only magnetics with a polarity that is South. Once the polarity is changed, however, that magnetic will then repel all magnetics with a polarity that is South.

Note: As I was tying this I kept misspelling “magnet” and typing “magnetic”. I finally requested clarity. I was led to this website and knew the term “magnetic” was the appropriate term. I did not argue as the definition is “anything that creates or has a magnetic field.” In essence, we are all magnetics aren’t we?

Information about magnetics was then applied to individuals. We repel and attract others (and anything with a magnetic field) based upon our own polarity. Yet, our polarity can easily be changed. It can be changed by coming into contact with someone (or something) that has an opposite polarity to us. In other words, put the magnetic in the field of a magnetic with an opposite polarity that is higher than its coercivity, plus a bit extra to neutralize the field it already has, and you change the original polarity of the magnetic.

Lost yet? I am barely following along but then I see the bigger picture so it is all lining up as I write this.

Ultimately, I was being shown this to explain how our relationships with others change throughout our lifetime; how we can be attracted to particular people, places and things only to seem to become repelled by those very people, places and things at a future date. We, as magnetics, change whenever we come into contact with other magnetics. Sometimes we change slowly and other times quite dramatically. I am shown that we add or lose protons (+) and electrons (-) all the time. Usually, this occurs very gradually. Sometimes this process can take lifetimes. Sometimes it can be instantaneous (and quite disruptive as you can imagine).

I wondered about this information. Perhaps the dream I had was showing me that such a change is occurring with my friendship? Is it possible that our polarities are changing, causing us to repel one another when before there was attraction? I was told, “Blend”. This in itself requires further contemplation perhaps for another future post. 🙂

Information about the sun (plasma), solar flares and geomagnetic activity was also relayed to me. I was shown that the dramatic changes occurring on planet Earth are resulting in similar dramatic changes in the magnetics of Earth (which means you and me and all life) and are a direct result of the sun (plasma).

At one point in time all this scientific explanation would have put me off for lacking a “spiritual” component. Yet this entire planet, universe, that we exist in, was created by Spirit (us). Science is just part of the end result of our creation. All of it – protons, neutrons, magnetism, plasma, etc – is a result of that beginning spark created by that split that resulted in duality. We’re living it.

The final message I woke with was that duality is purposeful. It is intended to help us experience ourselves. On my mind was a question posed by my guidance, “Why do you resist duality? Why not embrace it?”

Indeed, why not?

 

Sources

http://science.howstuffworks.com/magnet.htm

https://www.nasa.gov/mission_pages/themis/auroras/sun_earth_connect.html

http://www.livescience.com/54652-plasma.html