Category Archives: Ascension

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House Cleanse and Multiple Me’s

Yesterday I felt a need to smudge my entire house. I have not done so since we moved in. So, for 20 minutes, I took sage and smudge every corner while demanding negative entities and energy leave and asking the light to come in and protect us.

I have not done this in quite some time and my own energy was low in the beginning. I did not think anything of it until I reached the room where I often sleep. In reality it is my son’s room but he refuses to sleep in there – he’s only slept in there once in the nearly 2 years we’ve lived here.

While in the room I felt a distinct difference in the energy from the other rooms in the house. With this sense there came flashes of images and emotions that hit me one after the other. I realized there were quite a few imprints left here by a young girl and I knew who she was. She was the youngest daughter of the previous owners who had gotten caught up in gang life and been kicked out of the house. Apparently, this room had been hers at one point.

I recognized that she had been visiting (another aspect or her astral self) the room over time. The unsettled energy was imprinted upon the room and her frequent visits revived it. So I changed my clearing technique and focused on the imprints and the girl. I prayed for her to have closure and for healing and assistance and asked for the imprints to be cleared. I stood in the center of the room and prayed for her and then smudged the window again as this was a heavy area.

I left, finished smudging the house and felt a distinct difference in my own energy. It felt like I took a damper off of it. I returned to the room and prayed for the girl again and then checked my daughter’s room for similar energy because she has had sleeping issues recently. I found no lingering energy or imprints there or in any other room.

I can’t believe I have been sleeping in that room all this time and never noticed the energy difference!

Multiple Me’s 

While meditating this morning, I was reminded of the smudging from the day before and noticed the room’s energy was much lighter and calmer. Pleased with myself, I focused on my own energy and breath for a while, entering into the trance state quite quickly.

I noticed several strange occurrences while meditating. All of them appeared to be aspects of me exiting. The first was of a hand reaching for a cup that was not part of my reality, yet I perceived it as real and the hand as mine but not mine. The same situation arose when I felt a distinctly different part of me cross her legs but my own legs remained in their present position. There was recognition of another place as well – one in which the other me was dressed in a white lace gown.

The most significant of my observations was when I witnessed this other aspect literally get up and rise out of my chest and walk away. This was quite a shock! An entire body arose out of me. A head came out of my heart and the rest of the body climbed out with it. I did not have time to focus on what she looked like because the shock of it broke my trance state.

In hindsight, I believe all three – the hand, the legs and the entire person – were one aspect that I somehow was able to perceive. At first I thought maybe I was just falling into a dream and witnessing part of the exit from my body and the beginnings of an OBE. This almost seems accurate except that I never felt vibrations and never lost consciousness or felt the shift, etc. The typical OBE signs were never present. My only conclusion is that I witnessed another me – a multidimensional aspect. It raises questions but I don’t bother to ask them. The feeling is that I am correct in my assessment and should count myself blessed to have gotten to this point of awareness.

 

 

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New Cycle of Energies

Yesterday the energy was up and down and a bit rigid, asking us to let go of old patterns – the death and resurrection of aspects of the Self which no longer serve us. Yes, this is a cycle that continues to repeat itself. Why? We humans have a tendency to repeat patterns even when cognizant of these patterns. We “toss” them, think we let them go, but then, when things get tough or circumstances repeat themselves, we find ourselves clinging once again to that which we thought we released. So the work never ceases. If we do stop, thinking foolishly that we are done, we will find a huge dose of reality hitting us sometime in the future that forces us to see that we are not yet finished. This cycle is the crutch that goes along with being human.Without it, we fall flat on our faces and reluctantly have to use it to walk again.

The energy dramatically shifted over night and today it is elevated and bringing with it lots of old baggage in the form of emotion – anxiety, tension, fear – and resistance. These emotions are lingering remnants from the eclipse energies. They need to be released and will be whether we like it or not.

This is the beginning of a new cycle of energies preparing us for the work ahead. For the forerunners most of this work has been done already – or so we thought – but as I just stated, our human condition forces us to continuously work to maintain our current energetic state. With each cycle we chip away at “new” old issues/patterns/beliefs while also flushing out any garbage which may have settled back from past clearings. Remember, also, that we are clearing for the Collective, so this work never ceases and as we (the world) progress becomes ever more important and vigorous.

The “work” ahead varies for each of us. I have recently recognized a consideration once again rising to the forefront of my thoughts. It is the consideration that my work is something bigger and more exciting than my current and past life experiences. It is funny how the Ego likes to feel important and such thoughts still circulate despite all the hard work I have done to put it in its place. This is a great example of the continuous clean-up process. In order to be ready for our “work” we first much drop any expectations of what that work will be. What we want is not always what we get. Few will find themselves in a dramatically different life situation when their work is revealed in full. The reality is that we must be open to experience anything and have faith that our lives will align with our Divine purpose here. Everything has its place and purpose.

As I type this, I am reminded of something I was told this morning upon waking. Though we think we have considered every possible outcome and action, we can’t possibly consider all options that exist. In fact, for every potential outcome we envision, there are unlimited others. In even attempting to predict our future we succumb to the Egoic mind and all its accompanying illusions.

So when you perceive this new cycle of energies, or IF you perceive it, remember to stay present in the moment and open to whatever experience may come to you. If you slip, it is okay. There will be intense emotions and life situations that force repetitive patterns and reactions to the forefront. Try not to judge yourself too harshly when you find yourself embroiled in situations and events reminiscent of your past. Such circumstances are inevitable and purposeful for your development and transformation. Remember not to label your experiences as “good” or “bad”. Observe them and learn from them. In doing so you will not become trapped by them.

 

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Maintain a High Vibration

Yesterday was a fantastically beautiful day! Unfortunately for me, mundane life took the front seat. Things have to get done.

First off, my husband went to get an eye exam. He had been complaining of not seeing well when driving months ago but never made an appointment. The only reason he got an appointment is because I made one for him. lol Anyway, turns out his vision, which has always been 20/20, is almost as bad as mine now. I do not know how he managed to even drive! I wouldn’t dare drive without glasses or contacts. No way! So now he wears glasses and wants to get contacts. We’ll see how he adjusts. lol

Me, I had to get my teeth cleaned per the requirements of starting my orthodontic treatment. I knew I would not get good news. It was just a feeling. I had not been for a cleaning in 2 years and thought I would have to get some fillings replaced. Turns out all is well – apparently I didn’t even need a cleaning (after 2 years!). BUT they found a Grand Canyon-sized crack in one of my molars. Huh? They took a picture with tiny camera and showed me. It was plain as day. So no big deal, right? It didn’t hurt so I figured all was well. The dentist explained that it was good that I had no pain because a crack that size usually exposed the nerve causing excruciating pain. Since this was not the case yet, I was “lucky” and could get a crown and fix the problem before it began to cause me pain and cost me tons more money.

So I will be getting a $1300 crown on Tuesday. Why these things cost so much, I will never know. It definitely makes me feel old, though. How the hell does one crack a huge molar? They said I probably bit down on something hard. Hmm, yeah, of course I did! That is what teeth do – chew! lol

What is crazy curious about all this is that I was calm and collected the whole time. They took my blood pressure and it was 109/69, pulse 80. Hahaha. I’m probably the most chill patient they’ve ever had. And when I saw the crack I never once panicked or worried about money, pain, etc. This is very out of the ordinary for me. I did think about the cost, but mostly because I had not expected the added cost. In my head I was doing calculations to figure out where I would pull the money from. I knew this “bad” news was purposeful.  I need to fix it while I can afford it regardless of the cost. Who knows where I will be in the next few years and I definitely don’t want to be in the position where I am in excruciating pain and need an emergency root canal. Yuck.

On April 5th I will be getting braces. Thankfully, now days they have options that make them nearly imperceptible. Mine will be wire but with clear brackets. I won’t be able to eat normally for the entire time I wear them which is estimated to be 14 months. I still have difficulty justifying the expense for one misplaced tooth, but there is a feeling that I need to do it. Gotta go with my gut.

Despite all the “bad” news yesterday, the energy was sublime and people who I encountered were happy in a bubbly sort of way. Spring is in the air!

violet

Protect Yourself – Maintain a High Vibration

Today the energy is a bit different – more erratic. My household seems quite affected. This morning my husband woke on a rampage which was not pleasant. I hate it when he gives me lectures like I am one of his children!

I began to perceive this difference last night. My husband is big into Game of Thrones and so I watched it with him but kept being distracted by our stereo system. It kept flashing the message, “Connected”. This is the Bluetooth, of course, but usually it is not connected. When I saw the connected message I felt a wave of energy pour into me via my crown and from my back through my heart chakra. I knew this was a message that me and my counterpart in Spirit are “connected” and the love that washed over me was confirmation.

About half an hour later I was drinking my tea and felt a different energy. It did not scare me but I recognized it as lower in vibration than is normal. The communication from this entity suggested an earthbound (ghost) or at the very least a resident of the lower astral/etheric. This particular entity was trying to disguise himself as my Companion and I detected his disguise quite quickly and surrounded myself with Light and called upon the Violet Flame.

Afterward, I asked why this was occurring and was told to be careful of my thoughts as they manifest quite quickly. I then realized that watching that T.V. show had shifted me into fear mode and my thoughts had been along the lines of doubting what I had been experiencing. This opened me up to lower vibrational entities. NOT something I wish to experience.

Just goes to show how very important it is to keep your vibration high.

 

 

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Willing to Experience Anything

Though the energies have been high and quite intense, I have not noticed them quite as much as is normal. Perhaps I have adjusted? The only indicators for me that the energies are high right now are: 1. My guidance/intuition tells me they are. 2. My heart, third-eye and crown have been active on and off. 3. My sleep is more interrupted than usual and I am having more vivid dreams.

My dreams indicate that I am going through yet another transition period and making more decisions behind-the-scenes.

Community College or University – I had a dream in which I was deciding if I should go to a community college or university. A line of students were waiting for orientation at the community college and I remember mulling over my options. I was going for an advanced (doctorate) degree so I chose the university. The feeling from this dream is that I am choosing what direction I wish to go in. There comes with this dream a sense that choosing the university indicates choosing a “school” many, many others would also be attending. Maybe the lessons then are more mundane in nature?

Piranha Swimming in Air – I walked into a bedroom and saw a large aquarium with big fish in it. I prepared to feed them when I saw one of the fish swimming around in the air about me. It startled me and I left in a hurry. I told some people outside, “Do you know one of the fish escaped? Be careful because it’s a piranha and it could bite you.” I also asked, “Is it even possible for a fish to swim in the air??” Fish out of a fish tank and swimming in the air is actually a common dream for me.

Fish are usually representative of ideas and/or insights from the subconscious. A piranha is likely an idea or issue that is literally eating away at me and causing me internal upset. The fish tank itself indicates I am in control of my emotions (all but the piranha that is).

tardisRejecting Intuition – In this dream I was at a busy intersection with others. It reminded me a large city like New York. There was a man sitting on the bench. When I saw him I intuited that he would be in an accident and lose both his legs. I decided not to tell him because I believe doing so is irresponsible and unethical. I continued past him but was asked to stop and reset this machine for the next person. It reminded me of the Tardis from Dr. Who except it was smaller. I found the latch and flipped it. The latch was labeled, “Walk-in”. There was much confusion here in the dream and a thought of wishing I didn’t know what the future would bring.

Continued Shifting

There are other dreams intermixed with these but the themes are similar. When I awoke one of the six times that I woke in the night (ugh!) I recall knowing that I had chosen to slow down progress towards Wholeness. I am afraid and need to sort through that fear. I was not very nice to myself upon recognizing this and viewed it as a flaw. There was also knowing that a rest period has been entered (again) and April 4 came to mind. As usual it appears my guidance is giving me a heads up on when the next rush of energies (likely Kundalini) is coming.

In the meanwhile, physically I look and feel wonderful. There has been a physical transformation in me over the last couple of weeks that I am pleased with. My complexion is superb when it has been anything but since the end of January. I have more energy than usual and my body just feels lighter. It is hard to describe. Additionally, I am feeling more connected to my body and feel so much more than I have in a very long time (3 years?). I am actually interested in sex again. Huh? lol Happy dance. I literally feel like I am 20 years old again. Woo-hoo!

On top of these changes, I am also feeling more motivated. Today I have an appointment with an orthodontist to fix my teeth which has been an on-going irritation for me since my 20’s. I have never done anything because of the high cost involved and I could never justify paying so much for one out of place tooth. This time I’m going to do it. It’s an early 40th birthday present to myself. 🙂

There is also present an inkling that I might be able to venture back into the workplace. The thought of it is still unsettling but I sense this will break down in the next few months. There are still some things in my life that need to shift before looking for work but I am being prepared for something that is coming.

I am willing to experience anything at this point. 🙂

 

 

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Meeting my Mentor

This post is just to document some things for myself. 🙂

Messages

Met with one of my guides who refers to himself as my “mentor”. He has very calm energy and I feel very comfortable with it, it’s soothing and reminds me very much of the energy of a water sign. I felt he had no name but the name “Robert” popped into my head for some reason. I recognized his energy and knew he and my new entourage of guides had been in the background of my life for some time. They are the ones who planned this life with me.

Most of his communication with me was in feelings and images, though he did use words. So, most of what I recall now is in feelings. He asked me if it would be okay with me for us to meet. He explained that in this meeting he would not block the energy which would result in an amazing heart blast of bliss. I understood that this will happen either in a lucid dream or the in-between. He also explained that he will reveal aspects of himself to me. Since he is most definitely other worldly, I do not know what exactly I will perceive but he wanted to warn me of it in advance and reassure me that I could request it to stop at any point. He reassured me that I am ready for this and that it is necessary for me to become Whole. I wasn’t told exactly when this would happen. He just said, “soon”. I suspect it will be Tuesday or Wednesday based upon dream messages and the upcoming lunar eclipse.

While communicating with him we discussed the state of this world, my progress and my role in the future. Team Dark was mentioned and his reaction to this name and the energies they represent was, “It is inconsequential.” My understanding from his reaction was that Team Dark is simply a fear-based name based upon human programming and not to get caught up in the duality from which it arises. Those who choose that route are no different than those who do not – they simply wish to experience it while others choose not to. There is no judgement made and no “us versus them” mentality taken.

He advised me to avoid reading other accounts, channeled messages, books, etc right now because my experiences need to remain “untainted” by outside sources. He also triggered memories of my dreamtime activities. I recalled discussing trigonometry, specifically Sine, Cosine and Tangent and seeing/discussing actual math problems. There was acknowledgment of math and its interconnectedness to the universe and spiritual concepts. I saw the familiar triangles of the Merkaba and patterns of sacred geometry.

I also remembered that I chose to explore the social, psychological and spiritual while in physical form rather than scientific and mathematical concepts. This is because on the Other Side (or wherever we are in Spirit) my strengths are science and math and my weaknesses are the social sciences. I love to solve puzzles, just in physical life the puzzle I chose to solve was me. Pretty cool.

Throughout our conversations, I had an overwhelming familiarity hit me. There was also a feeling of anticipation and excitement – a “this is it!” feeling. My heart, third-eye, and crown were also activated at this time.

Dreams

I have been sleeping very deeply and have lots of dreams which are mostly lost to me upon waking. Last night I awoke at 1am to intense root chakra activity. It felt like a bubble of energy was expanding out from the root chakra. I do not recall the dreams associated with it, but I knew it was in preparation for whatever is coming next.

I recall being in college, specifically in a class about psychology and dreams. I asked a question about lucid dreams and astral travel and the class ended abruptly. I then met a woman with long, light brown hair who was shorter than me. When I saw her, I instantly felt drawn to her. The entire room had been dark but she was bright and her image very clear. I told her, “I like you.” lol We hugged and I felt we were long-time friends and she and I seemed inseparable. I sensed a strong heart connection with her and there was knowing that we were “partners”. She appeared to know this as well and we walked out of the room with our arms draped over each other’s shoulders. She disappeared after that, though.

Then there is memory of me and four others holding hands in a circle as we floated/hovered. The feeling was that we were co-creating/manifesting, but I can’t recall anymore. In the in-between more was revealed but I did not write it down and so now it is lost to me as well.

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Prepare for Take-Off

It is funny how sometimes it takes a question to illicit an answer. That is how it works with my guidance anyway. I believe this is true in all cases of spiritual guidance. Am I wrong? Tell me if you have had experiences that say otherwise.

Anyway, a friend of mine on FB has been reeling from the intense energies.She asked me, “Why is this happening?” This is what I wrote in response:

Acceleration on all levels. We are being propelled in whatever direction we have set sail for. So if you are one who is moving into the next level (5D or whatever you want to call it) then it will propel you that direction. If you are wanting to stay in 3D then you will get more of that. The energies are especially heavy and meant to clear out old crap we won’t let go of.

She is one of many who are being floored by the energies coming in now. There is wide-spread concern, even in the 3D world. For example, my husband called me yesterday on the way home from work. His mom got in a car accident. A woman rear-ended her and she bumped her head. My husband sounded strange on the phone. He was unsettled by it and apparently other things. He flat out asked me, “Is there something going on with that astrological stuff you always talk about? Because it has been a weird day. Lots of things have gone wrong and people are not acting right.” Ahhh! He IS listening to me! I told him about the recent geomagnetic storms and the upcoming solar eclipse and alignment with Jupiter. I gave him the short version. When he came home he was on the phone with a coworker. It was on speaker and the coworker was giving him more specifics from the NASA website. LOL My husband is too funny!

The energies are not negatively affecting everyone, by the way. Some are shifting into higher vibrational states, experiencing heart chakra bliss, and connecting to Source. Their crown chakras are blazing wide open and they are more receptive the messages (channeling). They are shifting into an altogether different world. I call this La-La Land but then the reality is that they have shifted into 4D or 5D. Honestly, I think most are in 4D – the heart-centered, intuition-led space that brings with it a feeling of connectivity to ALL on all levels. 4D should be named Blissville really, not La-La Land. I only call it La-La Land because of the mental space-out that accompanies it.

These energies are the ignition of the ascension engine. Up until now, everything has been preparation for departure. Some were preparing to shift into 4D while others were still deciding which direction they wanted to head in. Many, many have chosen to remain in 3D. Their engines will not be igniting nor will they be going anywhere. They are grounded for the time being. Others will be taking off very soon, heading in the direction they have charted for themselves. This will not look the same for everyone. Some will be heading for further clearing of 3D energies – their heart centers still quite blocked. As you know, to shift into 4D your heart must be clear; open. The heart is where it is all at in 4D and you can’t get to 4D with a blocked heart chakra. It just won’t happen. So some will be heading for some intense clearing at that level. Others will be shifting into further communication in 4D; tweaking their heart-centered walkie-talkies so to speak. Tuning in, learning the different frequencies and finding their own, individual frequencies, which, by the way, connect them with their soul families who have similar if not identical frequencies.

It is all very beautiful to think that one day we will be so connected. BUT ignition does not mean we will necessarily be ready to take off. Some of us will flounder and require more preparation. That is just how it goes. Just remember we will all eventually get to our destinations and when we do, we will not be alone.

I’ll let you know whether my engines are ignited just as soon as I get over this stupid cold. Of course, I have no idea what that is suppose to feel/be like anyway. I suspect it will be like all of my experiences thus far – I won’t know I have arrived until I get there.

The countdown begins……………….

Edit: Guess when this song was released?? 1989. LOL

 

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Wipe-Out

They say about the ascension energies, “Ride the wave”. Well, sometimes the wave is so gigantic you get overwhelmed by it and it takes your all just to stay afloat and keep the water out of your lungs. Sometimes there is no avoiding a wipe-out.

Yep, the BIG, super intense energies are here and, well, they aren’t finished. More is on the way. Intense and strong and in whopper pulses each time. Hang on. If you aren’t already feeling it you likely will in some way shape or form. Unless, like me, you have been sick this whole time. Then, maybe, you won’t have energy to notice much as you will be too busy blowing your nose and laying in bed. Of course, my illness is likely a direct result of my body adjusting to the energies anyway.

These in-coming energies are focused on the solar plexus and heart primarily, though the root and crown could also be affected, depending on the individual. This means all kinds of crazy things could manifest. Illness, depression, hysteria, headache, confusion, heart palpitations, anxiety, fear, restlessness, skin issues, digestive issues….the list goes on. The solution is to stay focused on your heart. Stay out of your mind. BUT if you get sucked into some of those low, scattered emotions, it is best to not be alarmed and allow them to pass. Try to keep to yourself and communicate to those around you that you need space and time to yourself. However, I recommend having someone close by if you are prone to depression, that way you can communicate that you need help if you get in too deep. Nature is always a good place to retreat to if you can, but if not, find a sunny place and sit/lay there for a while. I found watching movies occupies my mind and allows me to avoid over-thinking. Stick to positive ones, though, like What About Bob or a Chevy Chase movie. lol  Music also helps. Again, stay positive with the music even if you want to cry in your Cheerios.

You may also notice there are tiny lulls. This is just the space between the pulses. Like the trough of the wave, it will pass soon enough, so take the brief reprieve when you can get it. I noticed one of these yesterday morning. I woke up cheerful and felt almost normal. It didn’t even last the entire day. I am not sure when the next one will come but rest assured one will.

Personally, I have not felt too much of the energies. I do get all-over energy helmet (crown, third-eye, and sides of head) but honestly I think it is my guidance sending me healing as it has been happening at night after I request healing. There has been some heart chakra activity, but nothing major and always pathetically weak in comparison to what I have experienced before. I have, however, been experiencing some major emotional surges. These emotions are way low and negative. Hopeless, death-wish-type emotions and thoughts. I also have been very tired and sleeping deeply with few dreams. On top of that my guidance has gone almost completely silent, making me feel abandoned when I most need them.

Hang in there. The most intense energies will hit on and around the 9th and will then subside for a little while. The end of the month will bring more of the same but my guidance suggests the energies at the end of the month will be more gradual and beautiful; so less internal and external upheaval. That sounds nice and something to look forward to, I guess.

Remember, you are loved. 🙂

Edit: Just now saw that the K-Index was in the red yesterday and early this morning. Not surprised. NOAA website – check out the electron flux!

noaa_kp_3d

 

 

 

 

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Another Shift Approaching

Even in my sick state I feel it. So this suggests whatever is coming is going to BIG.

I was feeling good so decided to run some errands in town. While driving home I entered a dream-like state. And what is weird is I swear I saw energy patterns moving and swirling in the sky as I drove. Almost made me run into another car. lol

When I came home I wrote this down:

Sensing upcoming energy shift. Energy in-coming. Unsettled. Wavy. Energetic grid update underway. Realignment of Earth energy centers coincides with alignment of human energy centers. North and South poles and around the equator. Effects critical to hueman evolution. Shifting at the heart and solar plexus. Many will notice subtle effects at first. Heart palpitations, breathlessness, dizzy spells, panic, anxiety, fear. Maintaining a high vibration will reduce the negative effects and bring about moments of bliss, calm, peace and temporary amnesia to life considerations and/or problems.

Time frame? I am told there will be a steady climb in energy starting this weekend which will extend  into the end of next week. Wow. The especially big hitting, knock you down on your a$$ energy will be around the solar eclipse, but specifically I heard March 9th. The date was practically screamed at me.

My first thought was, “I’m still sick! Why are you telling me this now?” The answer was that I need to rest up because this next one is going to knock the last surge out of the ballpark. And based upon what I feel right now, I do not doubt it.

If we ride this one properly we can be in La-La Land the entire time. I prefer to be there, despite my mind not working, than sucked up into the depression and chaos that the 3D world will be sinking into.

Already I am sensing I am about to undergo more “adjustments”. Just when I was starting to feel more like myself….

Oh, real quick, I wanted to share the SuspiciousObservers YouTube Channel and their website. If you don’t follow them, you should check them out. 🙂 Here’s one of their recent videos.

 

 

 

 

 

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Temple Grandin

If you haven’t seen this movie, you should. It is free on Amazon Prime if you have a subscription.

When I was working as a school counselor, I primarily worked with autistic children. This was not my first encounter with children on the spectrum – I once taught a student with Asperger’s Syndrome – but it was my first ever experience with small groups of them. The occupational therapist (OT) who worked alongside me knew a ton about Autism and often mentioned Temple Grandin. I had watched some of Temple’s lectures at the OT’s request, but never watched the movie about her life. Now I wish I had. This movie is superb.

In September, 2014, I wrote a post about Autism and ascension. I have not thought much about it until now. Why? Well, while watching the movie about Temple Grandin I burst into tears more than once. This movie is not the typical tear-jerker, so why did it make me cry so much?

My thoughts when I would cry were linked to being misunderstood, overly sensitive, and an empath. All of these things were present in the movie, though the empath part was not prevalent in Temple Grandin’s story except when she worked with animals. I also cried because I knew that Temple and others like her were very, very special. Not just special in that they are considered Special Needs by the education system, but because their brains and the way they process information is special. Finally, I sympathized with Temple’s inability to understand humans and their complicated social system. She didn’t understand why girls cared only about boys or why people thought she was mad all the time and never happy. Facial cues were a complete mystery to her. Now, I don’t have the social ineptitude that she does, but I have long been made frustrated by human social interaction – the untruths, outright lies, peer-pressure, sex/gender stereotypes, roles, etc.

Considering all of this, I can’t help but conclude, once again, that autism is intricately linked to the new Hueman. I don’t believe we will all eventually be autistic. No. It is more that autism and the various levels that exist therein are preparing humanity, forcing us to change the way we view learning, so that we can better accommodate the starchildren.

 

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Rest = Illness?

It’s going on day three and the chest cold continues. I am reminded of something my Team told me in January. I did not take their warning seriously. I guess I should have.

There will be limited periods of relief which may physically manifest in illness, melancholy, confusion, listlessness, lethargy and other ailments. Provide yourself with what you need when you need it.

“Limited periods of relief which may physically manifest in illness“?  Isn’t that an oxymoron?

Since this message was received I have been sick twice. Both times I was “prepared” by my Team by hearing, “You are resting now”. Then….wham!…I was hit with illness. The first time was a nasty stomach flu. I have had the stomach flu before but this time my entire body hurt, I had a fever and was forced to rest for 24 hours because I just couldn’t do anything but lay down. Thankfully it just lasted 24hrs.

I guess this time I need more “rest” because this chest cold is killer. Yesterday my entire body hurt, I had hot flashes with sweating, my stomach hurt (what??), I had strange pains in various random areas (wrist, shoulder, leg), I had stabbing pain in my left eye, I was dizzy/light headed, fatigued, etc. What chest cold does all that?

Today the cold has moved to my head and my throat hurts. Yay. When I awoke both my eyes felt like they were raw, but no headache, which is normally the cause for my eyes hurting. Thankfully I have no fever, no body chills or aches and feel well enough to do my normal workout.

Oh, didn’t you know working out when sick cures you? LOL <—-This is why my Team calls illness rest – because it takes a whole hell of a lot to make me rest. I have to be slammed really hard by – yep – the stomach flu or something similar to slow down, stop and rest. You would think I’d have gotten the message by now. Nope. I don’t plan on changing anytime soon, either.

Their suggestion to me is to trade my heavy weight lifting routine for yoga, Pilates, body weight exercises, light circuit training (is there such a thing?), walks in the park, etc. In fact, I had a very strong urge to cancel my gym membership. What???? I was warned that my heavy workout routine will “exhaust my resources”. With this, they pointed out that I have not been eating as much. This is true. My appetite is gone. I have to force feed myself and many foods don’t appeal to me anymore. For example, peanut butter. My all-time favorite snack. Now it tastes just wrong and the honey I eat with it does, too. 😦 I turn down sweets as well and if I do eat them I don’t eat much because they taste too sweet. And I don’t want to eat as much, it is like my stomach shrank.

I almost followed their suggestions last week. The urge to cancel my gym membership was extremely strong. I have only been going to the gym one day a week instead of four. So I have at least toned it down. Instead, I workout at home but apparently I still do too much. I can’t believe they expect me to tone it down so much. 😦

I’m a glutton for punishment I guess. When will I ever learn?