Category Archives: Dreams

by

Questioning

My purification is soon to conclude and my Companion has moved in a bit closer, initiating communication with me in the evenings. There is a bit of a disconnect still ongoing and it was explained to me that I have shifted from a heart focus to a mind focus. I recognized this to be true and attempted to center in my heart but found it difficult as my mind continued to drift back to pressing issues that it seems not able to let go of this last week. In my exhaustion I eventually drifted in and out of sleep.

I also received a message that I would have more intense and dramatic dreams. As if to illustrate this point, during the first minutes of sleep I was awakened suddenly from a dream in which I observed the execution of several people. I saw their heads explode and it startled me awake.

I have had so many dreams last night that I am not sure where to start or what to focus upon so I will recount on the most recent of them.

It is Well

The last dream I recall was of me driving with a woman toward a destination I don’t recall. She stopped at her house on the way. I looked out the window and saw a very dilapidated house in disrepair. It stood out amidst the very pristine neighborhood it was located in.

I watched the woman go inside and attempted to peek in and see if the inside was like the outside. I got a glimpse of a modern, updated house and assumed they were renovating the place. The woman walked up to the window and looked out at me. What was weird is that the window had that tint on it that appeared like a mirror to all on the outside looking in. So I saw her as a reflection. I knew this was wrong. I shouldn’t be seeing her at all and this confused me. I did not think more on it and headed into the house.

Inside I saw a sparsely decorated space with sleek lines and mostly light pine furniture with no cushions. I headed into a large room where many people were gathered. The woman who had driven me to the house was in front of the group talking about plans and I was distinctly aware that I had walked into a church meeting.

The group began to sing and I joined in. They were singing, It is Well With My Soul. I knew the song and enjoyed singing it very much. I sang loudly and could hear my voice rise above the voices of the others. I felt wonderful.

The singing stopped and the woman began to talk about a fundraiser that was suppose to have been planned for Halloween. I was suppose to have begun working on it and I recall that the fundraiser was selling pumpkins. It was to start in September but I had not started working on it yet. I felt ashamed because it was August and I had done nothing.

The woman then explained to the group that it was a sin to have sexual relationships outside of marriage. I felt completely out of place at that point and began to leave. I was asked why I was leaving and I said, “I have three children. It is obvious that I have had sex many times” and I laughed.

As I attempted to leave I felt to be followed and began to look for my glasses. I picked up a pair on the table but the prescription was wrong and they were tinted. I was able to see more clearly than with my own glasses, though. I remember putting them down and leaving.

I began to question the dream at this point and started to focus in on the people who were all around me. I saw the faces of men and women, all strangers to me, and they were all looking at me like they were waiting for me to do something. I recognized that I was dreaming then and began to try and move into the crowd of people and take control of the dream. I began to feel myself moving back into my body. This is when I woke up, the song I had been singing still vivid in my mind.

Questioning

The dream seems to go along with how I have been feeling in life lately. I have been questioning everything that has been happening to me spiritual since last summer. A full year has passed and though I have gone through some miraculous spiritual changes, I still feel very much like I did last summer. There is an incompleteness and a nagging feeling that I am missing something, but I don’t know what.

I also have a strong desire to leave my job. I attempted to listen to my heart about it last night and when I recognized that it was in my best interest to leave the job, my mind took over and made it almost impossible to remain centered because it was freaking out. I seem unable to control my mind no matter how hard I try. Thankfully, a strange inner calm remains despite the mental pushing going on and this keeps me from overreacting and doing something prematurely. Every time I think I have made a decision about my job I get pulled in the other direction. I feel like a yo-yo.

It very much seems that right now the New me is working hard to control the wild, out of control horse (Ego, human personality). Right now, the method of control is merely holding back the horse while it lashes and bucks in an attempt to remove the intruder. There is not much else that can be done until the horse calms down and recognizes its attempts are getting it nowhere. Then, when the horse is calm and submissive, movement forward can be made.

So the message is clear that no decision can be made in my current state. I am okay with this. I can have either option available to me and recognize that I need to be open to possibility right now. Though I do not know what is coming up next, I have faith that all will work out as it is intended.

by

Preparing for the Next Stage

I am on day 12 of my purification and am feeling excellent except that I am now struggling to fall asleep at night. I blame the extra energy I have for that.

At this stage I am not noticing too many toxins and chemicals being released. There are occasional muscle twitches in my back and one nostril will stop up randomly, but other than that, nothing. I suspect the muscle twitches result from a release of tension in my back from all the time in the sauna. The stopped up nose could be allergies or maybe the nasal spray I used for so long through each of my three pregnancies.

I now look forward to the running and to the Niacin flush as it turns on full force in the midst of my runs.  I forgot how freeing it can be to run for long periods of time. Yesterday I did not want to stop running and actually extended my running time to 35 minutes. 🙂 I also find myself daring the Niacin to do its worst during my run. I kind of have the “no pain, no gain” idea going on. That is just how I am, though. I love to push my body to its limits. I also strongly believe that one’s mindset makes all the difference. Long ago I decided, “I control my body, my body doesn’t control me”.

Sleep Changes

As I mentioned already, falling asleep has become a challenge with all the extra energy I have. It takes me about 2 hours to fall asleep when before it would take literally minutes. I am also now waking up more frequently in the night like I did prior to starting the purification. I suspect my body has adjusted to the new routine and the increase in vitamins and minerals. I also find it interesting that these sleep patterns go hand-in-hand with the solar flare activity lately, which has been off the charts.

I awoke this morning from a very realistic dream in which I had accidentally killed a man and deciding if I should confess or try and hide it. I went to the police station and told the officer of my crime and he filled in a sheet. He left for a long time and I began to fret and worry if I had done the right thing. I ended up sneaking out the back door and running. The whole time I was escaping I knew that it was pointless as all the evidence pointed to me. I thought of all my options, even suicide, but recognized I had to take responsibility for my actions.

When I woke from this dream it was still very real to me and I had to reorient myself to present time. I literally awoke feeling I needed to prepare myself for a long stent in jail. Ha! I then recalled that while I was hiding from the law I was mowing a lawn and doing yard work. How odd!

Spiritual Changes – Preparing for the Next Stage

Yesterday, while in the sauna, I felt the familiar energy helmet sensation come on for a minute or so and then vanish. It happened again an hour or so later and now is just barely noticeable again.

I spend most of my sauna time reading Science Fiction books, so it is rare that I notice anything going on with my body/mind because I am so engrossed in my reading. I am currently reading, A Darkling Sea by James Cambias (great book!). Reading passes the time and keeps me from fixating on just how hot it is in the sauna (168 degrees).

Yesterday I would be pulled out of my reading by the strange helmet energy or a sudden thought unrelated to my reading. My guide would respond to my thoughts, which he hasn’t been doing for some time. He again communicated with me last night prior to bed saying to me, “You are large” and sending me a mental visual of my energy (aura) expanding way past my normal six to eight feet around my body. I was white and expansive and felt this body to be so very small. He then said, “You will remember again” when a memory of the amazing things I have experienced caused me to long for more. I asked if this meant that my “rest” was over, and he said, “Not just yet. We will ease you into it”. I know I am nearing completion of my purification, so this is likely why I am again receiving communication.

by

Universal Consciousness Revisited

Despite deep sleep last night, I had some interesting dreams in which I was being led into an understanding of upcoming shifts in consciousness. I awoke, in fact, with an image of the Earth in front of me. It was spinning on its axis and the continents were visible. I then saw pinpricks of light begin to pop up in one area, expand outward in a blue grid pattern and then move to the next continent in the same manner. Eventually, all of Earth was lit up with this blue communication network. Seeing this woke me up and I heard, “universal consciousness”. I understood that an event was soon to come in which those ready for a consciousness upgrade would experience a linking with one another at a very deep level; a Oneness. This, of course, would come with a Remembering of the Self.

Large Earthworms and Tree Root Houses

My dreams were interesting and memorable. The main one began with me at a friend’s house. She was opening her garage and we were getting into the car when I spotted what looked like a large clod of wet dirt. I said, “Watch out for that. What is that?” She said, “Oh, those are just worms”. I looked closer and sure enough it was a glob of snake-sized earthworms.

I saw another clump of these worms before we left and remember wondering why they were so big. We drove right overt he top of one clump even.

On our way we traveled across a desert in the car and other times floating along just above the ground. We came across what appeared to be a hollowed out structure made of rock. It was meant to hold a fire inside and when illuminated resembled a skull. I commented on it and was asked, “What is it for?” I explained that it was meant to illuminate the mind.

We went onward and finally left the desert area and came upon strange structure made of tree roots. The trees appeared to be dead but they weren’t. Upon future inspection the structures resembled houses and I said to my friend, “I could live here!” I went inside. It was perfectly made, trees branches entwined to create the perfect dwelling. I felt so comfortably happy.

Interpretation

I awoke with the vision of earth and a message, “There will be a climax in consciousness”. I tried to ignore it as I did not want to get my hopes up, and tried to sleep. I couldn’t, of course, and eventually got up and wrote down the message.

For me, the dreams encompass the preparation for whatever is about to come. I was being shown a penetration of deeper layers of consciousness (earthworms) and a connection with universal consciousness (tree root houses). I received communication from my guides but it was lost to my mind before I could interpret it. Already, my mind is beginning to blank out in preparation for the coming changes and reception of information is limited to my heart space. it is a feeling of knowing rather than a knowing of knowing. My head is also abuzz with energy and has been for the last few days. However, my focus on my purification has left me so exhausted that I have been pretty much oblivious. I am adjusting, though, which is why I believe I perceived so much upon waking. My body feels to be recovering and rebounding. Yay!

by

Dream: Bluejay Turned Cat

I couldn’t fall asleep last night because of a nasty head cold I came down with a couple of days ago. It is funny how this cold works. Through the day I feel fine but then once the evening approaches I begin to get all stopped up and my throat hurts. I can’t sleep with a stopped up nose and sore throat. Nasal spray and Benadryl were my go-to’s but it still took me until midnight to fall asleep.

Bluejay Turned Cat

I was inside a house talking to a parent-figure for some time. The house seemed filled with twilight – the ambiance was calming with a bluish-gray tinge and sparkling energy that was energizing and familiar to me. I never saw who I was speaking to but I knew him.

Suddenly, I saw what appeared to be a large spiderweb covered in dewdrops. It was spectacular looking except that there was a large bluejay trapped in it. The bird was flopping around trying to get free and I watched it, hoping it would succeed. I eventually felt bad for it and stopped my conversation to help free it. However, it freed itself without issue and flew off.

I followed it and found myself walking in the twilight on a beautifully manicured green lawn. Down below was a large lake with cattails and lily pads. There was still an energy and bluish tinge to the air.

I watched as the bird turned into an orange striped cat. He was meandering toward the pond. He would turn into the bluejay ever so often and this did not seem to bother me. To me, they were one in the same.

The cat stopped and seemed to have something around his leg. I went to try and help and he flew (turned bluejay) across the pond to the other side. He then ran out of my sight, again turning into the cat.

I noticed he had dragged something with him across the lake. It was a green extension cord. How odd.

I was speaking with a boy at this time, my other half or twin. We decided we wanted to get the cat and he said the parent person had a boat. I saw it in my mind, a nice, flat bottomed boat. We requested to use it and permission was granted. However, I was afraid I would fall out and explained I had never been in a boat before. I was told I would have to do it without the parent person’s help. I would have to row my way across on my own.

Interpretation

I felt to be in a school situation at this time and much of the conversations I had are lost to me. However, the dream symbolism suggests I have overlooked something (bluejay) and am trying to control my spiritual progression (stuck in web). The bird turns into a cat suggesting that the overlooked aspect is connected to the spiritual feminine, independence, creativity and power. The green cord could be symbolic of connection to the spiritual like the silver cord so often observed in OBEs by others. Green symbolizes healing.

I seem uncertain about how to retrieve what I desire which is to help myself heal and reconnect to my spiritual feminine, independence, creativity and power. It is important to note here that bluejays also can symbolize the mind, body, spirit.

by

Clearing the Path

My night was full of healing dreams last night. I had so many that it would be the longest post to write about them all. What seems to be happening, though, is that I am being guided through memories from my early life – teen years mostly. In one dream, I even ran into my high school friend’s father who died several years ago. I told him,”You look different”, and he asked me, “How?”  I said, “You don’t look so harsh”. Of course, this is a reflection of me more than him, but it was so very vivid that I wondered if I actually met him or if it was a dream creation of mine to help me learn.

I recall having a conversation about that high school friend, discussing how I felt I should still keep in touch with her. My guide asked me questions that I did not hear aloud and I reflected upon our severed relationship. I felt guilty for not being there for her during her cancer but then I realized we had drifted apart long before then. I remember saying, “We were too different”. At the end of that dream I realized that relationships are purposeful. She came into my life to help me and when she was no longer needed, she left. I acknowledged this and moved on.

In another dream I ran into an old coworker who I feel I wronged. I hugged her upon seeing her and she flinched as if I hurt her. She put her hand to her left shoulder and held it and I apologized asking, “Did I hurt you?” She did not reply and I realized she had a chip on her shoulder which I reminded her of. Her healing is not done and she is still bitter. I felt no remorse for what I did upon that realization. It is her burden to carry, not mine.

When I finally woke up for the day, I heard very clearly a voice say, “You are becoming crystalline”.

Chakras as Alarms?

When I went about my day today, I found my reactions to my husband were full of anger. I didn’t understand and could not hold back my spite towards him. I also noted a strange sensation in my second chakra. It was almost like that sinking feeling one gets in their stomach when they are nervous, but this was lower down and not very strong. I have never felt anything like it. I recall recognizing this feeling was out of place. I wondered, what was going to happen?

The day continued with me remaining irritated at him. It finally subsided later on after he told me something that upset me and I just accepted it and moved on with my day. Later on, however, I got onto the computer and happened to see an email he had typed. It was related to what he told me earlier in the day so I read it.

I became completely enraged by the email because 1. it revealed he had not told me the full truth and 2. the subject matter was something I should have been consulted about, but was not.

He left to take the kids to a party and I got to be home alone. I immediately remembered the second chakra feeling I had at the beginning of the day and I wondered, when did he send the email?

I checked the date and sure enough he had sent it the night before. Somehow, I had sensed his betrayal and a part of me knew. Had I just paid attention I would have known why I was so upset with him most of the day.

This betrayal is not the end of the end or anything, it is just about being able to trust my husband. This is a core issue in the realm of the second chakra which is all about relationships and creativity. My second chakra acted as an alarm to try and help me understand why I was feeling the way I was feeling, but I didn’t catch onto it. I will next time.

It is interesting to me that all this occurred today after receiving the message about becoming crystalline.

by

Dream: Soiled Wedding Gown

I again had a night full of vivid dreams. This time there was a theme. In several of my dreams I was either looking into a toilet or sitting on one and each time there was feces in it that was not mine. Yuck! Both times the feces would not flush even though the water would drain and new water would fill up the toilet.

Soiled Wedding Gown

In this particular dream I was hiding inside a bathroom stall. I say hiding but I am not sure I was doing that, but it felt like I was trying to stay unnoticed. I was sitting on the toilet, preparing to use it, when my dress got into the toilet water. I pulled up on the dress and saw that the white lace had been splattered with tan colored feces.

Grossed out, I attempted to clean it off by using the toilet water but saw that it was full of a very large turd. It was not mine and I did not want it there so I flushed the toilet. The poop remained as if stuck to the bottom of the toilet and I flushed it again. With the second flush, it went down the drain and clean water remained. I used it to clean up the dress but the spots would not completely wash out. I remember thinking, “Oh well, no one will notice”.

I then noticed my baby had found me and this caused me some upset as I wanted to be alone and there he was in my private space!. So, I got up to leave but saw that the entire silk underskirt of the dress had gotten into the water. Thankfully it was the clean water so I just squeezed out the water and went on my way. I remember thinking my dress was ruined but then reconsidering as everything that had been soiled on the dress was from either underneath or at the end of the train.

Interpretation

I awoke from this dream in the midst of an argument between my Ego self and my guide. This part of me was adamantly against the instructions we had recently received. My guide was asking me to listen to my heart and I fell into this space with ease and was immediately calm and knowing. The Ego self got quiet all at once and I understood the dream and the reason for her upset.

The wedding dress was an assessment of a personal relationship, in this case most likely my relationship with my family. The feces indicates areas of my life which I find repulsive and reject. I understand now that I was being shown these areas are still “soiled” and my reaction is that they are not a big deal in comparison to other issues I have had in the past.

The upset in this case was that my instructions are to remain where I am in life and continue to focus on my family while expanding myself spiritually. There was no other work to be done, no specific or exciting projects forthcoming and no relief from the daily grind of life that my Ego self was hoping to have.

It was then that I was taken to a place quite unexpectedly. Standing next to my guide I saw a lush green valley spread out in front and below me.  A river was winding toward the horizon where the sun was low in the sky and there was such magnificent colors that I thought it must be a painting I was in.

My guide said, “Do you see that river?”

I nodded, “Yes”.

He said, “That is your life, your path”.

I looked closer at the river. It was shallow with various higher areas of green grass in between dozens of channels. It appeared almost like a path with various roads which would diverge only to meet up again and then diverge again. There were many, many paths and I knew they were all possible routes I could take.alaska

So many options.

I understood then what he was showing me.

“It is easy”, I said to him. “The river is shallow enough to wade through”.

“Yes”, he confirmed.

“And I can choose to go any route I choose”, I said as I pointed to the paths the river took.

I remembered then my plan prior to this life which was to assist with the ascension. My job is to help others find their way. I do this through my writing and the relationships I have in my day-to-day life. My counseling came into my mind as did my relationship with my children.

I saw then that the other paths were mine to choose. They were not pre-planned. I could do whatever I wanted with the rest of my life. I could fill that time however I chose.

So much possibility but I did not know what I wanted to do. I wish I had planned these paths before coming.

“Whatever path you choose will be the right one. They are all part of your path”, my guide reminded me.

The Ego self wanted more, though. She wanted something grander. She wanted to scream to the world of her gifts, of her “specialness”. To set herself apart from the crowd. But to do that would destroy my purpose completely.

I then understood that I had to blend in; to do my work without being noticed or praised for it. To walk in my human shoes as a human does but with a knowingness of my origins and my purpose tucked inside my pockets.

It is probably the hardest life one could choose to live. It is the ultimate in humility and servitude.

by

OBEs: Body Troubles

After a night of intense dreams and the typical wake-up for my briefing this morning at 5am, I fell into the in-between where my guide and I conversed for some time. I heard my guide say to me, “You can go anywhere you want, whenever you want”. In hearing that, I attempted to launch myself out of my body in one giant leap only to find my exit was blocked by the body. It was like a tall, impenetrable, invisible wall. I wanted out!

Observing Another Me

I then found myself watching a scene play out in front of me. I was the main character but I was not in the body experiencing myself as the character but rather above and to the side as an observer. The man who was me was in the midst of a lucid dream in which he had just recently awakened. He was standing next to a woman who was his wife I think and she was the typical dream dummy – blank face, zombie-like expression and slow-motion, puppet-like actions. There was a child as well, but the focus here was on the woman. He was trying to get her attention but she did not respond to him.

Then, suddenly, she had in her hand a pistol. It was a pretend pistol, though, and looked like one of the child’s toys. She took it and shot herself in the left hand, right in the center of the palm. She then took her hand and held it up high. Blood was pouring out of the wound. She took her hand and put it in the face of the man.

The man was confused. Why did she do this?

As if his question were being answered, the woman suddenly had in her other hand a folded up note. She began to hand it to the man.

As the observer, I suddenly was very interested in this note. I wanted to know what it said!

I pulled my energy in towards me, like summoning it from beyond myself into my center. I then rolled to my right and off the bed.

I had instant, clear vision. The colors were golden and the room and its contents seemed to spin around me. Or was that me spinning? I could feel people there with me, but could not look at them because of it.

There was a feeling that I was not OOB. “This is real”, I thought. I then bumped into the corner of a table. It felt solid and the impact on my hip caused me to pull back from the sting of it. Still spinning with the bright light flooding my eyes, I felt a bit disoriented.

“No, I am OOB”, I thought, “but this sure does feel real!”

I immediately headed out of the room as fast as I could. I felt rushed, as if I had something important to do.

I then became aware of a strange sensation. I felt a part of myself trying to break off. I wanted free of it but it would not budge. Instead, I felt wracked by intense, sporadic vibrations that threw me into more of a tailspin and made my vision begin to fade out. Then, I could not breathe and began to gasp for air. I felt my physical body very acutely at this time but was also very much aware of my being out of it. I was literally split and there was a distinct dislike for my physical body and a resistance to it.

Body Troubles

I came back into my body and took a deep breath, still feeling a constriction in my throat area. I noticed my throat hurt but I didn’t care. I also felt odd sensations in the lower three chakras, like they were breaking apart. There was a deep aching in my second and solar plexus.

I wanted to go out again.

With the thought, I waited for a bit and then, as if knowing the right time, I rolled backward again, right out of my bed and my body.

This time I had no vision and I felt something wrapped around my neck. It felt to be my blanket and it coiled up tightly around my throat. Since I only had mental vision, I pulled myself hard against the blanket in an attempt to free myself from it. I requested clarity to try and gain some stability (should have asked for stability), but nothing happened. I had to free myself from this blanket!

I walked around the front of the bed and pulled the blanket over my head. It released and I tossed the blanket on the bed and headed toward the door. Again I asked for clarity, but something didn’t feel right. The vibrations were again wracking my body and I felt to be spinning and standing still at the same time.

With that I began to again feel desperate for air. I knew it was my physical body doing this to me and so I tried to get away from it so its hold on me would be less. Unfortunately, the body took a huge gasp for breath and this pulled me back into it.

Realization

Back in my body, I wanted to make another attempt but felt there was something I needed to know. So, I changed positions and swallowed hard, noting my dry and sore throat.

I thought back on the experiences and wondered why I felt such strange spinning and shaking.

Then it hit me: It was my etheric body that was causing the crazy shaking. I was attempting to drop it, to throw it off and be free of it. The sensations fit. I felt like a snake shedding its skin and finding it won’t come all the way off. So it stuck to me and pulled on me, shaking me and disrupting my progression.

In my past OBEs I have never had such a feeling. I would just move into the next level, the astral, without issue. However, this was more of me throwing off this lower body rather than moving into the next. It felt like I was trying to dissolve it altogether. Is that even possible?

by

Dream: Flooded Car

For the first time in a while I remembered a full night of dreams. I will focus only on one since it was an answer to a question.

Flooded Car

In this dream I first remember being told about a huge flood that was stopping traffic at certain intersections. I then saw in front of me a road and without knowing why, I began to drive at high speeds toward a part of the road that was partially submerged. What is interesting here is that I was flying, not driving at this time. I never actually saw my car but knew it to be my silver Prius.

When I hit the part of the road that was flooded, I was stopped by the water. I don’t remember being in the river of water, just that I was now without my car. I saw other cars that had been caught, lined up along the side, but did not see mine.

I then spent a while trying to find out where my car went. I ended up inside a stark warehouse asking different people what happened to my car. I saw in front of me a list of different car types and their corresponding storage areas where they were placed to dry out. I could not find my car as it was by license plate and I did not know mine.

I began to wander through the building and into rooms. In some rooms there were household items and furniture piled up with tags on them. I passed through this room without much interest.

I went through various levels, sometimes up and down, without finding my car. Finally, I was outside the warehouse being shown where my car was. But when I located it, it was my SUV, not my Prius. The Prius had been totalled, its electrical systems destroyed by the water.

Conversation with Guide

I awoke in the midst of conversing with my guide about the above dream. I recognized the dream was in response to a question and request I had made. My request was that I go quicker through whatever transition it is that I am going through. The question was, “Why is it going so slow?”

It is obvious to me that the Prius represents my individual path and the SUV is that of my path with my family. The flooded roads indicate areas of high emotional charge that have yet to be released and perhaps even the Ego’s hold over these areas of my life. The road was not completely submerged, only halfway.

I threw myself down the partially submerged road and got stuck, my car ultimately was totalled. This symbolizes what would happen if I were allowed to go quicker through this transformation. I would stall out, overwhelmed by emotions, literally drowned in them. I won’t say it means I would “die” but it definitely indicates an overwhelm so big that I would be unable to cope with it.

Then I was shown the SUV as an answer to what I need to be doing now – focusing on this path I am currently on with my family. The rooms in which I walked where furniture and household items were stored symbolize areas of my current life that are emotional triggers for me (there was another dream that explored my connection to my children after this one).

I was not very happy with the answer I received because when I am not experiencing changes related to my transformation, I feel bored and restless. I was reminded to focus on my heart and it helped and now I feel fine, but upon waking I was very upset. Slow and steady wins the race I guess. Sigh.

by

OBE: Practicing Multidimensionality

After the weird sleep paralysis episode and then being engaged in a lesson about confronting death, I went OOB three times.

Two Short Projections

I found myself in a semi-lucid dream in which I was watching a town full of people who had gone crazy. They were all starting fires within their community and nothing seemed to break them from the trance they were in.

I then shifted into a room and which I was talking to a massive Great Dane. He was as tall as me but I was a dwarf and male. We were discussing the issues of the world, specifically a war and the devastating results of it. We eventually decided that we needed to change bodies. I went into his and he into mine. He then took a large carpet and wrapped me inside of it. At this point I remember trying to figure out who I was. Was I the dog or the man?

This is when I became aware of the vibrations which were intense. My body felt to be jumping and I wondered briefly if I were really awake.

I decided to sit up and get out of my body. When I did, I worried I would sit up physically and stop the projection. It felt so real!

Thankfully, I was able to get up and I went out of the bedroom. I immediately began to chant, “OM”. Unfortunately, it did not have the affect I wanted and I was pulled unevenly back into my body.

Upon re-entry I heard my guide say, “Not now” in reference to me wanting to go back to the place where I had met up with my Team the last time I projected. I understood why. We were practicing something, but I could not remember what.

Not long afterward, I projected again, sitting up out of my body like I did before. This time I did not chant but thought that I wanted to go to a higher level than I had previously been on. I ended up walking on soft grass. Unfortunately, my vision was inhibited but it did slowly begin to clear and I could make out a tall tree in the center of the grass field I was in. I touched it and said aloud, “Ok, what did you want to tell me?”

I got no response and my vision quickly faded out.

Practicing Multidimensionality

When I came back to my body I once again felt the weird shaking vibrations. This time I could also distinctly feel energy spots on my body and there was a sense that I was being adjusted and worked upon.

I projected quite easily after that, just popping out of my body and moving directly out of my bedroom to the area just above the stairs. I couldn’t see again but wanted to float down to the first floor. I jumped up and looked over the side and for a moment thought, “I will fall”. There was a thought in response that said, “But I can fly”.

I successfully floated down and landed in the living area and my vision turned on crisply. I saw my husband and daughter and could also see my youngest. When I saw them, they greeted me. My daughter said, “Mommy!” I said to her, “Want to come with me?” She said, “Yes!”

Eagerly, she ran to the front door and threw it open. She was out of it before I could catch up.

I went outside and it was a brilliant day with bright blue skies, puffy clouds and vividly green trees. It resembled very much our neighborhood. Oddly, it was horribly windy, so much so that the wind hit us with tons of resistance making it hard to stay stable.

My husband came out behind me and I watched as my daughter propelled herself into the air and reached her hand out to me. I jumped up, flying toward her, and grabbed her hand. I looked back and my husband was heading the opposite direction on foot. He left the door open and I almost said to him, “Shut the door, Elek will get out” and then I remembered, “Even if he does, it won’t matter, he can’t get hurt here”.

I continued on with my daughter and we flew up above the treetops. I felt a tugging on my other arm and looked back. There she was pulling me the other way. There were two of her! I laughed and pulled the other her along with us as we soared down the streets.

The wind was still blowing fiercely and there was a thought that came with my inspection of it, “It is your body. You are sensing the vibrations”. And I knew suddenly that I was both experiencing this astral experience while also experiencing what my body was experiencing. I was in two places at once.

I then saw a woman place something on her front door step and shut the door. Curious, I began to move toward the house but felt, “No”. I ignored it, though, and kept going to the door. My vision darkened and I was back in my body which was shifting violently with vibrations. If I had not known what the vibrations were I would have thought I was having a seizure.

After this projection I heard my guide say, “You should get up now and write this down”. I didn’t though. I lay there for some time enjoying the energy blanket, surprised that I was able to remember everything that happened.

by

Dream: 40-Year-Old Virgin

I again experienced the strange separation from my body as the night before, but this time it was only once and I resisted very little. I did resist, though, as the feeling is somewhat disturbing.

Interestingly, I remembered several dreams upon waking. I have determined that the dreams I am remembering are meant to help me with this transition by allowing me, this Earth Self, to play out scenarios and sort through beliefs and worry. Technically, these dreams are doing what psychologists say dreams are meant to do.

40-Year-Old Virgin

One particularly vivid dream I remember occurred this morning and was the last dream I recall having. In this dream, I was inside a small, yellow-lit house, in the kitchen with a man. He was older than me, about 40, and confided in me that he was still a virgin. I remember that at this point in the dream he began to resemble Steve Carell and the movie, “41-Year-Old Virgin” was prominent in my mind. I am not attracted to Steven Carell in the least but in this dream there was an attraction I could feel in my root and second chakras. I recall feeling very alive and vibrant but not being overcome by desire or anything like it. I felt compassion and sympathy toward this man and also felt a very strong connection with him.

The dream seemed at first to be moving toward the sexual. We kissed and touched one another, but it was all very gentle and exploratory – there was no hot and heavy passion or flames of desire. It was like we were getting to know one another and exploring the familiarity that existed between us. It was very much like we were two teenage virgins connecting with the opposite sex for the first time.

I remember deciding that we should stop exploring one another. I was also aware of my middle son being nearby and something about his presence caused me to think of my husband. My relationship with my husband was what caused me to pull back and I remember thinking and saying, “I have to end it with him”. There was such finality in what I said/thought. I also felt to be doing the right thing because I did not want to hurt him or cause him to feel betrayed by me going ahead with another relationship while still in one with him.

At this point there was a knock on the door. It was a friend. I began to busily clean up the living area, sweeping up debris and cleaning off the furniture. I moved upstairs and I overheard the Steven Carell look-alike complaining and reprimanding my son. My stomach flip flopped and I thought to myself, “There is no point in starting a new relationship. They [men] are all the same”. Yet there was recognition that the words being said, the harsh criticism coming out of his mouth, were in fact my own words.

When I went back downstairs I was questioned by my friend, “Where were you? We have been trying to find you since last night”. I realized it was already mid-morning and so I told her, “We fell asleep”. I had a worry that someone would think we had been doing something wrong but then I knew we had not.

Interpretation

When I woke from this dream I thought, “I have to leave him” but it did not scare me and now, as I think about it, I don’t think that is necessarily what the dream means. To dream that someone is a virgin denotes integrity and honesty with one’s self. It suggests that there is an “ideal” that is being sought out in a situation. In this case, within a relationship. So I am looking at what I would like to have versus what is reality. The reality being that I am not innocent in how my relationships turn out. The statement, “I have to leave him” is representative of the Old me, not my actual husband. I have to leave behind the old me, the old habits, beliefs and criticisms, in order to achieve my ideal.

The Steven Carell look-a-like was most likely a version of myself, the me I connected with in order to explore this area of my life.

When I got online to peruse the news I found this article – Heartache for Japan’s Real-Life 40-Year-Old -Virgins. It was the first article I saw and I actually laughed when I saw it.