I had this dream the same night as the dream memory of the Great Galactic War. The date was May 21st.
Activation of Purpose
The scene in front of me appeared to be of a disaster area. Spread in front of me was a roadway which had been lifted up and tossed over in all directions. Chunks of road could be seen that were as big as a car. People were standing stranded on the roadside, crowded up against the side of a mountain or cliff of some sort. The other side of the road was a steep drop-off. Peculiarly, there were no cars.
It was obvious the people had been there a long time. The part of the road that went over a ravine was destroyed and there appeared to be no way in or out of the area. Some people were in apathy, lingering together in huddled groups. Others still had hope and were trying to figure a way out. Still others had decided they were going to make the best of it and they began to pick on the weaker individuals, stealing from them and roughing them up.
I see the chaos and the lack of organization, of unity, and I begin to speak to everyone about how important it is not to give up and to work together. I become very passionate about what I am saying.
I awaken in the midst of speaking to the group. I am saying, “We must unite. We have to unite. Without us, mankind will perish”.
It is then that I realize who I really am. I am distinctly aware of this new me, this other me, and the contrast between the old me and the new. The New me has arrived.
Processing It All
The amount of awareness is indescribable. There is really no way to impart to you the evolution that appeared to take place at that point. I knew instantly, without doubt, that I was, am, a Starseed. The importance of my mission was so strong in me that it was like a light went off in my world.
This, I am told, is part of the activation process but there is so much more going on that is still yet to be completely revealed. There is a delicate balance that exists within me at this point between the old and the new. The old is not yet ready to be assimilated. The Ego is strong as is the mind. It is imperative that each step is taken slowly in order to procure acceptance.
Ultimately, there will be a swap in energies, a complete transfer from the old to the new.
I had this dream over a week ago and am just now feeling okay about posting it. I believe it was a memory mixed with a message and so took it as such. This dream was unlike any other I have had and I am still not sure how to categorize my experience, so I am calling it semi-lucid.
The Great Galactic War
My vision blacked out and I felt transported somewhere else. When I opened my eyes, I was standing inside an immense canyon, the walls of which towered hundreds of feet, maybe even a mile, above my head on either side of me. I was immediately reminded of the Grand Canyon here on Earth, but since I have never been at the bottom of it, I thought to myself, “This must be what it would be like”.
It was then that I realized I was standing with someone and we were in the midst of an important conversation. I spoke to this person as if I were reciting the lines from some long ago play. We spoke about something similar to a vaccine, though I don’t believe that is the word we used. It was a genetic vaccine, not a vaccine against a virus, and it had been tested on a certain individual to see if they were susceptible to its effects.
Slowly, I got out small vials filled with different colored, clear liquid. The first was a yellowish color. I said, “No effect”, and then put it in a nap sack I was wearing over my right shoulder. I then took out another one, this one a vivid blue. “No effect”, and put it in the nap sack. I did this six more times, each time saying, “No effect”.
I don’t recall now what the person I was talking to looked like, only that I knew them. In my recollection of this event they are not there at all, as if I am talking to thin air.
The individual I am talking to makes a comment to me about how odd it is that the individual we tested was not susceptible to any of these vaccines. In my mind I am reminded of the human race and think that it must be the human genome we are talking about. I was fascinated.
Then my attention is drawn to a tall, gangly looking individual who stood a good seven or eight feet tall. He was most definitely not human, his green mottled skin very obvious as were his strange facial features. His head was elongated and sloped backward and his eyes were dark and hooded. I could see no nose and only a thin outline for a mouth.
I knew this creature, this reptilian humanoid, was our prisoner. Had we tested the vaccines on him? I didn’t think so. He had something contained within his head, though, something vile and dangerous. My immediate thought was that it was a bomb and my companion began to tug at the reptile’s head to try and lift off the outer portion of it. I was a bit horrified as I could see inside the reptile’s skull and see the pinkish tissue of his brain.
Two sections came off before the reptile insisted he continue and do it himself. He pulled apart the hemispheres of his brain, parting them like water, and pulled out a small, circular device.
I woke suddenly upon seeing it, thinking it was a bomb and he was about to destroy all of us. In my mind’s eye I saw his eye, looking at me.
Once I awoke, I knew my dream was a memory of the Great Galactic War and that I had seen a reptilian E.T. I decided to paint the eye I saw because I could not get it out of my head. It was so peculiar and I had no fear when I saw it.
Prior to sleep, I had been told that more negotiations would occur through the night, commencing at midnight. I woke at 1am to a terrible thunderstorm and when I returned to sleep I projected several times. I abandoned each projection upon reminding that it was only needed for check-in. It was then determined a semi-lucid state was best in order to protect the Ego-self from the brunt of the negotiations.
During the semi-lucid state I stood in front of a mirror talking to myself. Yet the visage in the mirror was not me, didn’t even resemble me. The image was of a bald, very pale individual with a strangely proportioned face. The eyes were almost normal, as were all the features, but it was obvious to me that this individual was not me nor was it human.
This otherworldly being spoke to me and we conversed about planetary events and my mission while visiting Earth. It was so foreign to me that despite being in a semi-lucid state, my Ego-self kept reacting and interfering with communication.
The dream then shifted to a classroom environment. On one side was a figure, the one who I had been talking to in the mirror. He (I will say He but really this being was androgynous) had in front of him pieces of paper with odd looking writing scribbled on them. There was cut pieces of dark hair strewn across the paper so I could not make out the symbols. I was told, “You are not allowed to see this yet”. I did not object. I was distracted by a group of children being attended to by a tall, dark haired male.
I went to the group, intent on doing my part and was told, “I have this, go meet with him”.
I then looked out the window and knew there would be a storm at 4:30pm the next day. I said, “There is going to be a storm at 4:30, good thing I only work until 3:30. Maybe I will leave early just to be safe”. I then turned back to the man at the table who was waiting for me.
I went over the man at the table and sat down in front of him. He put in front of me a very long piece of paper and we went over it together. I don’t remember the content of the sections now, but I do remember that the first two were quickly agreed upon, even though I was unfamiliar with a term used in the second. The third section, however, was about changes that would be made in my life. He explained, “You will be asked to do things that you would not normally do”. I asked, “Like what?” but he would not answer. I said, “Then no deal”.
I awoke knowing why I objected. The issue was my family. I objected to them being split apart and my current personality was dead set against that happening. It was discussed during briefing and put on hold for further consideration. I was not allowed to remember the discussion.
Contract Negotiations
The contract is not yet final and I remembered that the finalization period was set to occur the end of July this year. My memory instantly went to a dream I saw as precognitive at the time, though then I thought it meant my mother’s death. What it actually symbolized was my own “death” and it outlines the time-period specifically stating the 21st to the “end of July” which in the dream was explained as the time in which full transition would be made.
My other self then took over conversations with the being from my dream, who I realized was one of the members of my Council. It was explained that my old self was not yet ready to see him. Therefore, what was seen was created as an acceptable version to the old self.
For the past two nights I have slept super hard, so hard that it is difficult to recall my dreams. I wake knowing I have had in-depth conversations, lessons and interactions with my HS and guides, but specifics are lost very quickly. I feel as if it is erased purposefully, only remnants allowed to remain.
One of those remnants, or pieces of clarity, remained this morning. In this dream communication I was discussing my blog with someone and read aloud a comment I had received.
The comment was: “It looks like she’s of MOAB”.
I spent the remainder of the dream trying to decipher MOAB. I was certain it was spiritual in nature. I probably repeated the acronym ten times in the dream, usually letter by letter.
It may not be significant but my husband and I were discussing the LDS religion when I remembered the dream.
MOAB
I did not recall this portion of the dream until almost an hour after waking. My first thought upon waking was, “Isn’t that a city in Utah?” But I immediately threw that out because in the dream it was in all caps.
So I looked it up. This is what I discovered. I may not have found all significance:
1. Mother of all bombs or Massive Ordinance Air Blast
2. Explicit sexual term (I won’t write it out) meant as an insult
3. The seed of the father, the eldest son of Lot (Genesis 19:37)
4. A plain opposite of Jericho mentioned in the old testament; the desirable land. Source
5. Represents the Protestant religion and referred to in a prophecy about the “End Days”. Source
6. City in Utah.
Biblical References
I would not call myself a religious person. In fact, I avoid organized religion in general. However, I keep running into biblical names and references in my dreams and spiritual encounters. I cannot avoid coming to the conclusion that there is some significance in this. But what?
The feeling from my dream was this term, MOAB, was important. So important in fact that I repeated it to myself over and over again in order to remember it. I also attributed it to something spiritually significant. Other than that, I am at a loss. I guess the term will join the other names I have received along the way until their significance is revealed.
If anyone has any idea what this term could signify, please let me know.
Last night was again a night of frequent vivid dreams.
Reorganization
I was in a school and left my room. When I returned an older lady was inside and had completely reorganized it, turning it into a classroom. There was a group of elementary students sitting in desks. I was alarmed.
The woman smiled, very proud of herself and said, “We decided to set up the room so that it was more conducive to teaching. I needed to work with these students and this works better for me”. She pointed to a table and then at the twelve or more individual student desks crammed up near the front of the room.
I looked at her like she was crazy and told her, “But this doesn’t work for me and this is my room. Please put it back to the way it was. I don’t work with more than six to eight students at the most, so I don’t need all these desks”. I pointed to cubbys that had been set up on one side and said, “And I don’t need these”.
I walked to a closet where I had stored some things and found that it had been cleared out and made into a small classroom with a large central desk with chairs set around it. Feeling I should at least try to compromise, I concluded that it would be okay to leave this space as it was and told her, “But you can leave the closet like you have it. I am okay…”
She interrupted me, obviously very upset and disappointed and said, “That’s fine. I will put it all back like it was”. She walked around the class and began to get the students to help her put it back the way it was. I remember feeling at odds with myself somewhat. I wanted to make her happy but at the same time I did not want my space cluttered and taken over by this woman.
Premature Baby
At this time, a black woman entered the room looking for me. She told me that she had some important news for me. She introduced herself as the representative of a family, the name is lost to me now.
“You have been listed as the new guardian for a baby girl. Her parents were both killed, as was her twin and other sibling”.
She escorted me out of the room as she told me their story. I was, of course, shocked as this was unexpected and I was not prepared to once again care for a newborn.
The woman explained that the family knew me from a while ago. The grandmother, still living but ill, was one of my previous coworkers. She had chosen me as the new guardian. She told me I had a choice and did not have to accept. I told her, “Of course I will take her”. In my mind I could not refuse and leave the little girl in the system. I quickly disregarded all my concerns about being ready and the burden it would cause my family. I wanted to meet the child.
We entered the house of the family. The grandmother was sleeping in a chair. I looked closely at her, trying to remember her. She was very old, with white hair and dark skin. I immediately went to her and another family member said to her, “Mother, she is here”. The old woman opened her eyes and smiled at me. She conveyed to me that she knew the child would have a better life with me.
I was then shown the baby and it was explained to me that she was born premature but was currently just 4 weeks old. I looked at her, expecting to see dark skin, but her skin was pale and her eyes light. She was very, very tiny and so precious. I did not dare pick her up as she was sleeping. In my mind I saw an image of what she would look like as she grew up. Beautiful. She had that beautiful creamy mix-race skin and curly, soft blondish-brown hair. I was completely accepting of my new role as her mother.
It was then explained to me that I would have to take a class in order to be her new guardian and then adopt her.
The word “adopt” kept echoing in my mind and ultimately woke me up. I was in a panic over it, literally thinking such an event might happen. But now I think it was more symbolic of a new beginning coming into my life which involves acceptance of parts of myself I have previously rejected. Then the previous dream flooded my memory and I realized I was in the midst of a reorganization of Self.
Sometimes I have very emotional dreams. This morning I awoke to one such dream.
Temptation
Most of the details of the beginning of the dream are lost to me now, but I recall the most important details.
The dream consisted of me meeting this good looking, Hispanic man. He appeared younger than me and reminded me of someone but I cannot figure out who. We were in a house that I was not familiar with and he and I had just met. When I saw him I was hit with such a familiar pang of recognition in my heart that it took my breath away. I do not know if he had this same connection, but I think he did based upon the way the dream went.
I avoided him for some time, speaking to him briefly and engaging in only casual conversation. I made sure to keep my distance because being near him caused an overwhelming amount of desire and I was certain he would notice. Perhaps he did because he kept coming closer to me and would not allow me to go far.
Throughout this I was overcome with feelings of foreboding, continually thinking of how I was married, had children and would not do anything to cause them potential suffering. I felt as if I had been ripped in two every time I saw this young man who would not go away and who I did not really want to go away. It was an agonizing feeling!
Finally, I gave in and stopped dodging him. Just looking at him was painful and also amazingly wonderful. I don’t remember what he was saying to me but I ended up allowing him to kiss me. This was, of course, probably not a good idea as the kiss caused me to understand the intensely deep connection that existed between us.
I broke away from the kiss and began talking one hundred miles an hour about my husband and family and how I could not, would not, do anything that would put them at risk. I remember wishing I were single so badly that it hurt. My insides were in all kinds of knots with energy welling out of my first, second and third chakras.
Message from Azekiel
I awoke still feeling the agonizing split between what I wanted and what I felt was “right”. I could not figure out why I was once again having this type of dream! Then I remembered the brief OBE I had where I was allowed to witness an agreement being made between my Higher Self and some others. I remember that there was a man involved and that he was married. I also knew the agreement was that he and I would meet. I remember I felt sorry for him.
Needless to say, I was not pleased with this memory and the sudden realization that I was preparing for a meeting. Dread is all I felt. All I could think was, “Why?”
My guide was very close and he said very simply, “You are sad”.
I didn’t feel this was true, but then maybe it was? Maybe I am hiding from a part of myself, some part deeply connected to a past where I was unfaithful? I do recall a life that fits that description.
In that, I remembered too much, I think, because I did find the sadness and two tears slowly rolled down my cheeks. I asked for healing, hoping to avoid any meeting like in my dream.
My guide said, “The healing needs to come via the physical”.
Just my luck!
I asked, “Who are you? What is your name?”
He replied, “Azekiel”.
I knew he was trying to prepare me, to help me with some big hurdle that is holding me back. I am not exactly sure what it is or why the healing needs to come via the physical. I suspect the person I am meeting has a similar need. Perhaps he and I are cancelling a karmic debt?
Near OBE
I fell back to sleep, asking to project. I was on my stomach and almost instantly found myself in the in-between but I was not becoming conscious like is normal.
I suddenly felt to be laying in my mother’s bed and all I could think about was the man from my previous dream and how desperately I wanted to be with him. The agony was very real and I just wanted to stay asleep and not have to confront the situation.
I felt someone shake me and say, “You need to get up now”. I ignored it and pushed against the hand saying, “I want to sleep”. The shaking happened again and I groaned. I heard other noises, the noises of a busy house – children’s voices, pitter patter of tiny feet, talking, etc. I specifically heard my sister’s voice. I do remember thinking that all I needed to do was roll out of my body, but I literally felt too tired to bother.
I woke up feeling so much better but I don’t know why. Perhaps I am just accepting that this needs to be done. Sigh.
Yesterday I had a phenomenal thing happen while in session. I recalled a moment from my past. This would be a time when not in the body. I have had this recollection many times, but only this time did it have an impact upon me.
Breakthrough
The memory is of being in pitch blackness. I can perceive the space around me and it feels as if I am floating in outer space, but I do not see stars or planets. When I try to move, I am blocked by an invisible wall that seems to go forever. This wall, when explored, forms a cube that completely traps me inside. I can see through it but cannot move from the small space.
In the past when I have encountered this memory I had no feeling except that I was stuck. I didn’t panic or worry about it. It just was.
This time, when I found myself within the space I instantly recognized that the way out was simple. I existed beyond the walls of my confinement. Reality was there was no confinement except that which I perceived to be there.
The moment I realized this, the barriers seemed to explode outward and away from me. I was hit with both a rush inward and a rush outward of immense amounts of energy. The energy was rushing into and out of the front part of my body from my heart to my pelvic area.
When it was done, I realized I had broken through a self-imposed limitation. I still do not know when this memory occurred. I just know I was not in a body.
Dream: Guiding Another
I had an interesting dream last night that had me recognizing a theme that has been on-going for some time. I seem to be guiding others in my dreams.
In this particular dream, I was inside a house that me and my family occupied. I was remodeling it and putting in quite a bit of time. There were these air conditioning units attached to walls and cabinets in each room. The units were no longer functional and I was taking them out.
I remember talking with someone. They were asking me questions about my plans. They asked me, “Why do you spend so much time on this house when you know you will not live here much longer?”. I replied, “Well, we will be here at least four more years, until I graduate. I figure I might as well make it the place I want”.
I went back to the kitchen where I had just taken out a unit and realized I needed to get new a new counter top. I was talking to my mom (though not my mom in real life) about what kind of counter top to get. For some reason it shifted to a bed and comforter and my mom shifted to my sister.
My sister here was obese, young and very plain looking. She was in college but struggling. She was also struggling with being happy and with life in general. I found myself guiding her and giving her advice about how to get the life she wanted. I told her, “You cannot have the change you want if you continue to do the same things you always have”. I helped her change from being at home all the time and eating to going to the library to study. I remember telling her about how her diet was rotting her teeth, too. We even went to the library together and I helped her to look up a book on microeconomics. I asked if her class was in economics and she said, “No, government”.
I assisted her with an essay she had to do. She seemed to know nothing about how to do research. The librarian wasn’t there and so she just wanted to just quit. I spent a lot of time instructing her on how to take the initiative. She just didn’t know how to do things on her own. No wonder she was failing!
Practice Makes Perfect
Upon waking I wondered if I was to take from this dream that I needed to change my own routines. The thought, however, that I was actually working with this girl to help her kept coming back to me. I have seen her before in my dreams……
That is when I remembered something I was told upon falling asleep. One of my guides had said to me, “There are others. You are not alone”. I replied, “I know, you’ve told me that from the beginning”. I then got a memory of a group and a feeling that I was to meet with them. I didn’t understand so I just went to sleep without asking for clarification.
Now that I think about it, I suspect this girl is part of my “group”. I remember her from other dreams, dreams in which we are always in a “classroom” or “teacher-student” scenario. Sometimes we are in an actual school, other times a warehouse and still other times in just normal places, such as with this dream.
Perhaps I am practicing my skills as a guide and doing so in my sleep? This rings true to me.
There was another shift in energy yesterday, at least I sensed it. I awoke in another sour mood but was able to shift out of it without issue and the day went about as normal but with low energy. However, the night revealed the shift was an actuality.
I awoke in the middle of the night from a dream I do not, could not, completely remember. The only thing I remember was that I had been in a completely white room and there were images floating around me. I felt completely peaceful when I awoke. It was like a weight had been lifted. I smiled and thanked my guides and fell back into a blissful sleep.
Deforestation
I found myself within a dream but not lucid. The dream was very vivid but that was it. I was inside a home with other women who were all mothers. We were eating a meal I had made and discussing our children. I can still taste the meal! I remember telling them about my most recent pregnancy and how easy it was even though I had was of “advanced maternal age”.
There was a point where I was organizing a shelf and someone had broken a figurine. I went to repair it and the bottom of the shelf became sand and I had dug a hole. I then began to uproot grass that was invading the area.
The dream shifted and I was suddenly aboard what appeared to be an amusement park ride but the car I was in was floating in mid-air all by itself. It was a bench seat and I was on the end holding on for dear life. The other women were with me and I was holding onto one’s hand.
The car moved like a helicopter (if you have ever been in one they can make your stomach flip flop) over the top of craggy mountain peaks. I looked below me and saw that the mountains were very rocky and almost completely devoid of trees. They looked barren although still majestic.
Then we flew into another area and I noticed vast expanses of green begin to appear. We flew closer and I saw that it was millions of tiny saplings growing in different stages. I was in awe and somehow knew that I was being show the devastation caused by deforestation and the hope that it could be reversed.
As we continued to fly (I felt like I was in a Harry Potter movie!) the trees began to grow taller and taller and the scene began to get more and more beautiful. I began to cry happy tears. We approached an old school building that appeared to be from some other time. It had ornate decorations and when I saw it I got very excited, as if I knew where we were going.
I saw the trees turn ancient at this time as well, their gray and twisted bark and green foliage very distinct. The car slowed and we entered the building.
Suddenly I was walking along an amusement park sidewalk and to my right was a large, shallow pool with bumper cars in it. All was quiet and no one was around.
I moved closer and saw the mechanism to turn on the ride but did not touch it. Suddenly the pool was alive with small, doll-like children. They were all the same age and seemed like cartoon characters at first but the turned more realistic. They came and encouraged all to get on the ride. I did not.
I watched as the people I was with got into the ride and it swirled them about in the water. They were strapped in and looked to be having fun. The conductor looked over at me. He was a man I had not noticed before with dark hair and blue eyes. He stared at me and I knew he wanted me to get on. I felt uncomfortable, suddenly knowing I was wearing a swimsuit under my clothes.
I thought of the shoes I was wearing worried they would get wet and then, not caring, decided to get in. The scene again shifted.
Three Bathrooms
I was waiting with the women to use the bathroom. I suddenly had the urge to have a bowel movement. I went to the bathrooms and was told that all but one of the three was broken. I waited and got a call from my husband. I answered it and he told me to be home by 1pm. I said I had not yet started and was a bit shocked he wanted me home so soon. The bathroom opened up and I let another woman in.
The scene shifted again.
Three Boys
I was traveling along a road in a car and stopped as a large, semi truck was going through a small tunnel. I got in line behind it and watched it squeeze through. Then I followed behind at high speeds and had to slow for a little boy was running about. He was attached to a car by a long cord that came out of his center. I followed him to the car as he climbed in. He was not a very nice little boy but good enough that he listened to me as I climbed into the car to take the wheel. He had two brothers with him, one in the back and the other, the smallest, in the front. I told the older boy to turn off the music (it was playing Cold Play) and looked at his brother. He had the most gorgeous green eyes and I complimented him on them. He seemed wise beyond his years. I was in the back seat at this time.
Upon Waking
When I awoke I knew I had been OOB but just had not been lucid enough to notice. As soon as I thought this, a voice from my right said eagerly, “That was me. I was with you!” A little irritated to have my thoughts interrupted I ignored him. He said again, “That was me! That was me!” I acknowledged him this time saying, “But you are male. I was with a group of women”. He stayed silent after that as I thought of my dreams.
I realized the number three was significant here. The three represents the physical, mental, and emotional aspects of me. Currently I must be working on the physical.
I felt, still feel, so much lighter today and happier. I now know the individual who was talking to me when I awoke was Spirit, not a guide. I feel bad now for not acknowledging him better. I suspect he was one of the little boys from my last dream.
I had this song in my head when I woke up, too. Specifically this part:
If scars are for the living
Then I could be forgiven
And everything you need
I could give you
If scars are for the living
Then I could be forgiven
And everything you have
I take too
I have been medicating my sleep with Benadryl so that I feel rested in the morning. However, for the last couple of days I have felt I should not take it. In this time I have come to understand why. I was missing dream messages and it was time to take notice.
The change in my sleep patterns is obvious. It goes like this: I struggle to fall asleep and when I do, I wake immediately after a dream. I fall asleep and the cycle continues. I woke about five times last night and each time from a vivid dream.
Eyes
In the past two night I have had dreams where I am fiddling with my eyes. In the first dream, I was putting in my contact lenses. One of the lenses was a large, pink pill the size of my eye! I saw it, thought it odd, but went ahead and inserted it into my eye. I blink and it dissolved into my eye and I went about my dream without issue.
In last night’s dream I took out my contacts because my eyes were dry and placed them into large, square dishes the two hands in length. A woman questioned me and I told her, “My eyes are dry, so I am giving them a break”. I later put them back into my eyes as I was leaving the scene of the dream.
Eyes symbolize enlightenment, understanding, subconscious, and awareness. They also indicate there is something that is being seen clearer than it may have been in the past. I seem to be playing with my awareness in my dreams – noting how I can choose to “see” or not see. The pill is interesting and in itself indicates restoration and healing. It is pink in color, representing love. In the dream I am inserting it into my right eye which indicates that I am accepting of healing of my physical self.
Manifestation
Another dream theme I am seeing involves exploring possibilities and manifesting desires. In one dream I allowed my husband to buy us a new house. He bought a mansion and inside I explored the rooms. He spent $410,000 on the house, which was twice what I thought we could afford but I shrugged it off. Inside the house there was a room that was elaborate with gold embellishments and a huge drum set that took up half the room. I remember thinking, “This room is not necessary”. The kitchen had small, shallow, black filing cabinets lined up inside it. I remember talking to my husband about the files we could put inside them.
When I woke from this dream I immediately thought, “I need to manifest what I want”. There was a feeling that I am too self-limiting when it comes to material things in life. It is time for me to allow myself to have more. This was what I was exploring in the above dream. It exposed my belief that having too much is excessive as represented by the room with the drums. The filing cabinets represent things I store or file away for use in life such as beliefs I hold on to.
Celebration
There is also a theme that indicates I have much to celebrate. In last night’s dream I was waiting in a doctor’s office to get my papers to go home. I was with a group and we were transferred to a room where there were people gathered to remember a passed loved one. There were images of the person who passed and everyone was grieving but I felt no grief for him as I watched images on a screen of his life. In the images the man was gutting his house and there were tubes all over the place. He died as a result. I recall feeling connected to him and happy for his successful transformation. We were then were led to another room and all let out a cheer together for our accomplishment.
When I woke from this dream the leg I had surgery on was covered in healing energy and I had a feeling that all was well.
I began to notice an energy shift a couple of days ago. At first it was subtle but it was affecting me. I felt “off”, like something wasn’t quite right but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Yesterday the energy was even more noticeable and dense. It hung over me like a cloud and I recognized that the shift was coming in hard and fast. This morning I didn’t want to get out of bed and I my mood was sour. I have adjusted now, but it has been so long since I awoke in a sour mood that it surprised me.
On Restriction
Last night I requested more information on the energy shift I am perceiving. I also asked if I could go OOB, lucid dream, or at least have some sort of wonderful energy-bliss experience. Finally I asked to see my Council, since I had never seen them before.
I was told that the perceived shift was indeed real and that it was to continue for the remainder of this week. As for my request for some kind of spiritual or OOB experience, I was told, “Not for two weeks”. When I asked why, I was told, “Your body is in peril”.
When I heard the word “peril” I wondered if it meant death but immediately knew the definition here was “risk”. In contemplating why this would be, I knew that it was because my body was recovering from my recent surgery still and that what was needed now was rest and recuperation.
How odd that a simple surgery to close one vein could result in such a long period of rest. Yet there also was the knowing here that it is much more than just the surgery that is the cause of this need. The energy shift and the resulting reorganization of the energy structure of my body is also at fault. Dense energies such as these hit the lower chakras that hardest. These are the chakras that are the most blocked by upsets in life. For me the result is a bone-deep tiredness and fatigue mixed with a high mental energy and restlessness.
Golden Lights
I fell into a restless sleep, still requesting to go OOB. I received confirmation from my Council – “Your request will be considered”. This was enough for me as I have faith that my Council will do what they can to fulfill it.
I found myself in a very odd dream. In hindsight, it appears that the dream was odd because I would drift in and out of the in-between state, coming very close to achieving lucidity.
In the dream I was laying in my bed and there was someone with me. This person was nudging me and talking to me about “waking up” and kept telling me someone wanted to talk to me. This person was pointing and nudging and shaking me and I was vaguely aware of being in a gray, shifty environment. I would shrug off the nudging and say, “I want to sleep”. I could feel myself trying hard to wake up but I felt overcome with exhaustion.
At one point I spoke to this person, who by now seemed to have a feminine feeling about them. She was asking me, “Wouldn’t you like to talk to them?” and I responded, “I would like to talk to my Grandaddy”. I was flooded with images of my grandparents during this time. My arm was being pulled and I remember wanting to get up but also not wanting to.
Something about the conversation and the pulling sensation woke me up. When I came to I was in the midst of intense hypnagogic imagery and subtle vibrations. My vision was flooded with a golden mandala-like image that moved and seemed to breathe with life. It was quite beautiful and I noted that it contrasted with the black and white images that have been commonplace of late when I wake in such a state.
Recognizing that I should not focus on the images, I began to try and relax and fall into the vibrations. When I did this, I began to notice my heart pounding in my chest and immediately knew that this would be too distracting to allow me to leave my body. I ignored the heart pounding and looked through the moving mandala image. There I could see a golden, winding staircase. I willed myself toward it but I must have been trying too hard because the minute I did this the imagery disappeared and I was wide awake.
Not too upset over the missed opportunity I fell back to sleep into odd dreams. When I awoke in the morning, I was overcome with the sour mood. I immediately was hit with intense, calming energy that radiated over my entire body. When it hit my leg it was uncomfortable and it was obvious that the trauma from my surgery was causing it. I thanked my guides and sighed. Two weeks seems like such a long time. At least I got the hypnagogic images.
