Message: Let Go of All Attachments

E’Fonin is back along with 9 others – my Team and my Council; The Many.

He never really left, of course.

2:30am

I had a dream in which I was fixing what looked like a dishwasher but then it seemed to turn into a very large window. I refused my husband’s help saying, “I can do this on my own”. I woke up.

I was pleased with myself for standing on my own two feet but there was a resistance to what I have been asked to do. I felt my Team present, but at this time had not singled out E’Fonin. I questioned them about what was happening to me – why did I seem to have so much clarity and resolve about my purpose and then fall back into self-doubt and resistance?

With the question my heart chakra pulled intensely and I could not help but be pulled into it. From this standpoint all doubt and resistance was erased. Immediately. The sensation of the heart had been unnoticeable until this point and then it felt like a metal rod of energy was shoved into the center of it. I couldn’t help but gasp for air from the intensity of it.

Message: Let Go of All Attachments

Once I recognized my question had been answered (remain in the heart) my Team proceeded to speak with me about attachments.

We are being asked to let go of all attachments. This is not limited to relationships but includes all earthly attachment from material possessions to attachments to the physical body.

We must drop them. All of them.

When I questioned why, I was shown how attachment = fear. It arises from fear. Fear of loss. Fear of the unknown. Ego-driven fear.

Attachments have been encouraged and reinforced by society.

I argued for attachment, pointing out that attachment to one’s children ensures the child’s safety and survival.

I was quickly shown this was an illusion. Even the attachment, the bond, between mother and child is riddled with fear, the main one being that the mother will lose the child.

People stay in relationships; cling to family, material possessions, people, situations, physical bodies, because of attachment. Attachment causes much suffering, propels us into moral dilemmas and keeps our vibration low. It fastens us to 3D. It is the foundation of karma.

Love is not attachment, yet here I was being shown how deeply entangled the two concepts have become even in my own mind.

Embody Love

In order to embody love we must forgo attachments. This does not mean we do not love, it means that we love enough to recognize the big picture; to step away and see the path of All which ultimately converges back into One.

I asked if it meant we no longer have relationships, specifically romantic ones. I could not see how not to become attached.

It was explained that we habitually fall into Ego which triggers forgetfulness and incites fear. We think, “I love him/her. I want them to stay with me always”. We forget they are with us always and have always been. Instead, we become concerned that they will leave us. We remember past physical lives, we become clouded and then we resist the potential of a timeline without them. This traps us into the karmic cycle. This perpetuates fear. This is not love. It is illusion. It is attachment.

If we remain in the heart we will find that we have always been and always will be connected to those we love and to all the potential for love that exists. There is no loss of this love. Ever.

I then understood what it is to embody love. It is to fully live from the heart.

hinduism-philosophy-god5D is Here, Right Now

5D is here. It always has been. We just have not been able to access it. We couldn’t see it. Our hearts have been closed. Our minds have been fooled. We have been trapped in illusion. I have been trapped in illusion.

My movement into 5D continues rapidly. I am accessing alternate timelines; “jumping” timelines. My DNA is becoming crystalline. I am shifting fully into the heart. Once there, I will be in 5D all the time. But what is crazy is that 3D will still be there. It is like they are superimposed. I saw the Earth as two; one 5D and one 3D. They are superimposed but most of us live in the one that is 3D. I am shifting to the 5D along with many others. Once we are there we will stay permanently. Yet I see that I will still have access to 3D. I asked, “What will happen to me? Will I disappear?” I was told, “Does it matter?”

No More Astral

Believe it or not, I was/am not overwhelmed by any of this. Somehow the conversation shifted into a discussion about my astral travels. Why have I stopped? Why can’t I project?

I was told the astral realms are connected to 3D. They are an extension of the illusion beyond the physical 3D reality. From there you can manifest much faster but it is still limited to the rules and restrictions of 3D. My travels are beyond the astral now. It is hard to explain because as I was shown it, the astral realms extend past Earth in layers, like an onion. Where I am traveling is beyond these layers and outside of them. Another dimension altogether.

I asked if I was ever going to get to project and was told I could as a means of rest, like a vacation, but the astral no longer serves the purpose it once did for me. My travels are inter-dimensional now, though I do not recall them yet. I am told my physical vessel is undergoing adjustments still and to be patient.

I was shown a Venn diagram. I have seen this previously, in 2003. One side is the human consciousness and the other is the subconscious. These two sides will eventually merge completely, becoming one. I can’t imagine how this will manifest, but this is what 5D looks like.

Acceleration is Imminent

I am told the incidences of heart chakra intensity will continue. This is when I recognized E’Fonin because I felt him “turn on” my heart connection. It was similar to flipping a switch. One minute it was a slow, steady warm energy, the next it was like a lightening bolt trigger that sent my heart into another gear and kept it there. When the switch was turned on, a part of my mind shut off. I separate from my earthly attachments. It is strange and a bit uncomfortable but the heart connection is so intense that I do not resist.

My mind wants to convince me that this heart connection is a trap, a device to “control” me. But when the thought comes my heart overrides it with a knowing that this is different. It is similar to the magnetic pull of a compass to true north. The pull is so intensely strong that it can easily be confused for some kind of possession or manipulation by an outside force. In fact, this consideration has come several times. Maybe I am being possessed by Team Dark? Maybe this intense compulsion is some kind of ET control mechanism they are using to manipulate Earth to their will?

When I think this way I hear, “What does your heart tell you?” And I always laugh at the absurdity of all of it.

This heart connection is going to increase beyond measure. It will be my compass. I will live through my heart. I cannot do anything to stop it, either. My path is set. Talk about Ego-trigger. hehe

 

 

 

 

 

Energy Surges

Happy 2016 everyone!

I had a busy night last night welcoming in the new year. Although I stayed home and was in bed by 10pm, energetically and spiritually I was a busy woman.

Energy Surges

After I fell to sleep, I recall being bombarded by energy surges to my heart chakra. I knew what was going on while it was occurring, but all that remained was an odd memory of being zapped and talking with someone. I awoke at 10:30 and 12:30pm because of the zaps of energy. Both times that I woke I was extremely thirsty and felt completely exhausted and wiped out, so I didn’t really care to ask what was going on.

4:30 Briefing

I was awakened at 4:30am with tears in my eyes, but I did not know why I was crying. I was also starving and very, very thirsty. As I tried to remember what had happened, I recovered memory of being on board a silver craft of some sort that was hovering mid-air. I recalled very briefly a dream of being inside a silver helicopter, but I knew instantly this was how my human mind was trying to make sense of where I had been. The helicopter opened up from its center and I knew I had transferred from one craft to another. Unfortunately, that is all the memory I retained.

For a brief time I was upset that my memories were being wiped again but with that upset came an intense calm from my heart and a knowing that I was focusing on the wrong thing. An overwhelming amount of calm hit me then and I no longer cared what I had dreamed about. I just knew I would remember what I was meant to, when I was meant to.

Messages

Once fully awake I had a guide I did not initially recognize to my left. I asked who he was and felt he was the one who I call The Dr. This confirmed what I knew had been occurring throughout the night – I had been receiving major healing and adjustment and it seemed the focus was mostly to my heart. I commented, “How much more is there to clear!?” It just seems like the healing to my heart never stops! I was told then, “All wounds heal with time”.

I was then shown an image of the final result the healing and adjustment. I saw golden energy in human form. I was told, “This is you”. Then, I saw a light shoot up through the middle, starting at the feet. As it moved up the energy appeared to grow in size and intensity. When it got to the crown it exploded out in a cascading golden waterfall of energy. I asked what it meant and I was told, “You will continuously be connected to Source”. I asked what that meant and was told, “It is so you can do your work”.

I managed to fall back to sleep and when I woke up an hour later I had memory of something else. I had been talking to The Dr. and he had put both my hands into a cup full of crystals. I could feel the round, smooth cool crystals on my hands. What was interesting is that they were immersed in some kind of gel, a conductor of some sort. How I know this, I am not sure. I asked what had been happening was was told, “It clarifies thought”. I also knew this had been what I was doing on board the silver craft.

What is very cool about all this is that when I woke I knew exactly what I was suppose to do. Not only did I know what I was suppose to do, but I had memories of a review of not only this life but several past lives. The purpose of which was to alert me to a karmic pattern that I could break in this lifetime.

Changes

My Team has also been congratulating me on my progress. This often comes with a question, “Don’t you see how far you’ve come?” or “Do you see how much you’ve changed?” I have been overwhelmed by the intense energy and the holidays so I have not really thought about their questions. However, this morning I am acutely aware of how much I have changed. What I think is the most noticeable is how connected I feel to my purpose and my guidance. I am notorious for flat-out ignoring my intuition. Now it seems my intuition is unavoidable. It seems to almost shout at me and what is bizarre is that I listen and if I don’t listen I am easily swayed. It’s the heart connection. It is like a mind-wiping, beautiful, loving and comforting hug that says, “Remember”. Though my heart is far from being my primary compass, it is quickly shifting in that direction. I am feeling an intense pull to change. It is almost compulsory in intensity and it is coming directly from my heart center. And I know it is only going to intensify.

Message: Be the Hummingbird

I took the advice given by many of you and focused on taking care of myself and this crazy energy last night. First, I ate a big meal. I immediately felt better. Then I took a hot bath with essential oils – 8 drops of lavender and 2 of Roman Chamomile. I also played music, specifically by Rising Appalachia (thank you KLeigh!). I was in one of my high’s before long and didn’t even mind when all three of my children crawled into the bathtub with me and began splashing.

Afterward I began to lose the high and fall into the exhaustion, but I let it happen and did not resist. My Team has been very close and the message I keep getting is to let go and allow. I went ahead and had some wine and watched some T.V. The whole time I had strange energy sensations all over my body and kept receiving high heart hugs from my Companion. Wonderful and calming. I also, for the first time since these energies began wracking my body, I had a rising of desire from the lower chakras. I pushed it down but it made me smile. I think my blockages are clearing.

I slept very, very well.

Dreams

I almost felt normal before , of course, I began to think that everything that happened to me these last 10 days or so was not real, not true, and I could be normal and move on with my life as planned. This thought was immediately interrupted with a knowing that I knew better than that. Then everything flooded back in and my body was covered in another energy hug. I was told, “You will rest tomorrow and we will talk tonight”. I recognized the energies of my Council of 12 and knew we would talk about contracts. Something felt final about it and I asked, “We are finalizing the contract?” I received confirmation but I joked and said, “Nothing is ever ‘final'” and reminded him of my ambivalence. Instead of humor I received a more serious energy from him. That shut me up and I went to sleep.

Teaching Developmentally Delayed Adults

The first vivid dream I recall is actively teaching adults who were most obviously developmentally delayed. We were doing language and vocabulary activities and I soon realized they were all at very different levels. Some were already able to spell while others couldn’t. I remember directing them to use block letters to spell out an answer to a question. It was like they were toddlers in preschool but some of these individuals were older than me!

I woke momentarily and knew this dream was representative of the various levels of consciousness of those on Earth. It was a bit disturbing to think that so many of us are at the spiritual toddler stage!

Be the Hummingbird

I had an entire dream where I was learning to be the hummingbird. This is symbolic of my mission here. I am being asked to fulfill my mission.

Bus Turned Trailer

Another vivid dream was of my husband and family. I was walking down a dirt road in the country. Tall, green trees and lush grass were all around and the dirt was that orange-red color I remember from my childhood days in east Texas. I looked up and saw my husband towing a white trailer behind him. He was not in a car and the trailer was one that should have been hitched to at ruck. I said to him, “Where’s your bus? Is it broken?” He just turned, smiled and waved at me and continued on. I knew he had our children in the trailer, but I kept going in the opposite direction

This dream woke me up with a start. I knew the symbolism right away. The loss of the bus is significant. Being on a bus or some other form of public transportation is representative of one’s family or group dynamic. In this dream the bus was broken and replaced by a trailer. In recognizing this I saw that a message I have been receiving was coming out in my dreams. My husband and family are moving in the opposite direction from me.

spiderweb-2

Messages 

The amount of information coming to me now is extremely high. I have been processing it for some time now. This partly because I am struggling to accept it and partly because I don’t know how to impart it.

Message 1: My mission is to embody the light; to be a beacon of light as well as to ground and anchor the new energies. I am also to activate others and act as a guide. I work with energies in many ways, more than I am aware of in this Earth consciousness.

Message 2: I am being asked to embody the light now. To do this I must drop relationships and connections that do not harmonize with my own frequency. If I am unhappy, depressed, angry, etc then I am not embodying the Light and so not fulfilling my role here. I have to “step up” now. Others are also receiving this message.

Message 3:  When I hit the age of 40 next year things are really going to shift to a higher level of intensity. I have already been warned of this as it will start next summer right before my birthday to prepare me. I am told 40 is a significant age for more than just me. It has to do with spiritual maturity and ability to hold more Light.

Message 4: I was greeted this morning by Eric who is a member of our ground crew. He is living presently in a physical body like me. He showed me a web, like a spider web. In the center the fibers of the web are very close and they get farther apart as it expands. He explained that the web is being extended now. With this explanation I was told that some members of this web are interconnected with me at a very, very deep level. These are the ones in the center. Others a less so and as the web extends outward even less so. Those most connected to me, those with me in the center, are extremely spiritually intense connections.  The others are less intense and more casual relationships. Our strength comes via these connections. The web grows stronger with each connection.

We are building the web now. The center is first and the most important. We will gather on a spiritual level first but eventually in the physical as well. I see large areas of light across the U.S. These epicenters of Light are crucial.

Message 5: I again saw my Companion as non-human in form. Those who read my previous description say he is Arcturian, but I identify him by his energy, not his appearance.

This time I was accepting of his appearance. He is beautiful beyond description! In accepting him, I accepted myself. I looked down at my hand and saw a non-human hand. Three long, thin, blue fingers and one thumb with over sized fingertips. I laughed because I was immediately reminded of a frog. Also with this acceptance I began again to think in terms of We. I have done this before but it had stopped.

We have many names. We take many forms. We are the Many. 

Elohim.

Day of Rest

When I awoke this morning my husband and three children were gone. They are on a camping trip and won’t be back until tomorrow evening most likely.

Day of rest indeed! 🙂

 

 

 

 

Recent Happenings

This post is just on random things I have been noticing but have not had time to write about.

Starchildren

It has become clear to me that my middle child, who is about to turn 5 in January, is definitely a starchild. He Remembers and is telling us about it.

For a few weeks now he has been calling people “humans” and does not associate himself with the word “human” at all. In fact, he gets very serious about how he is NOT a human.

For example, yesterday he wanted to play with his new tent. I was telling his daddy that it was two person tent. My son said to us afterward that he wanted to sleep in it but thought he couldn’t. He said, “But it is only for humans!” My husband and I laughed and said, “You are a human”. He said, “I am NOT! I want to sleep in it but I’m not human!”. We asked him who humans were and he said, “Not me. I’m a kid”. So we assumed he meant humans = adult. He refused that explanation, too. We just let him not be a human and joined him by saying we weren’t humans either but we can sleep in the tent because non-humans can sleep in it, too. 🙂

Aliens

My children keep referring to me as an alien. I finally asked why and my daughter said they were playing a game. I asked what I looked like and my son said, “You look like you but it is not really you. You put on a costume that looks like you do now”. I asked him to explain. He showed me. He said, “You put on your body, like this” and then pretended to put on a body. I laughed because he is so right! He couldn’t tell me what I looked like underneath.

Real Dreams

My middle son has been telling me about his dreams lately. He knows I “leave my body”, as does his sister, but he has never talked about his dreams. Then a few days ago he went on and on about one of his dreams. He said, “I was in our house mommy but it was empty and it was REAL! I walked around for a while and there was nothing in our house but it was REAL, mommy, real!” He continued to tell me how it was real. I asked him if he flies and told him I fly in my dreams. He said, “No, I walk I think”. I asked, “Do you have legs?” He thought really hard and said, “No. I think I float”. Bingo!

Other Comments

My daughter has been asking questions lately, too. She asked me one morning, “Mommy, what is real?” Now I know she knows the difference between real and make-believe but this was a question brought on by a conversation about ghosts. She likes to ask questions about them. We had talked a while about ghosts and then I forgot about it. Then she asked what real was. I asked her to think about it. She has not gotten back to me but I am sure she will.

Besides my children who constantly amaze me, my older sister called me yesterday. She never calls me. We had just spent time together over the holidays and had a really cool conversation about the show Ancient Aliens. She and her husband believe the same as me, which really shocked me. We had fun talking about it among other things. Then, when my sister called me, she said, “I was really attracted to your energy when we were at Mom’s house. Your energy was different. I don’t know how, but it was nice. You seemed really, really happy.” Now I didn’t have this experience at all. I was struggling with intense energy surges the whole time and kept to myself. However, when I was interacting with my family I felt really high and happy and was talking very, very fast and excited-like. I don’t know why. Maybe I am happy? What a thought.

Intense Heart Issues

One more random thing. After a week of being a sloth-person I decided to visit the gym. I go at least 4 times a week. It’s my escape and I physically push myself which is kind of like meditation for me because I can’t think when I am working out. Anyway, on the way to the gym my heart was pounding and burning through my chest non-stop. It continued while I was lifting weights and I had to cut my workout short because my heart would not stop and it sent me into anxiety/panic attack mode. On the drive home it continued but the closer I got to home, the less intense the energy until it just completely calmed down.

The thought came to me that maybe I should not be going to the gym. This is not the first time I have had this thought. This is also not the first time my heart has been crazy on the way to and during my workout. It seems to be screaming at me to not go there. But I like going to the gym! 😦

 

Message: Reassignment – Ashtar Mothership in Saturn’s Rings

I attended a company Christmas party last night hosted by my husband’s boss. Normally I don’t go to such events but I promised my husband I would. As is normal for me, the large number of people along with the fact that they were consuming alcohol, caused my energy alarm to go off.

I ended up sticking close to my children and away from the crowd in order to cope. When I did this it helped immensely and I found I was able to protect my energy. What is funny is that the more drunk the crowd got, the easier it got for me. It is like once they got tipsy the group energy stabilized and thus allowed me to lower my energy defenses somewhat. I still kept my distance, though.

Toward the end I accepted a rum and coke from a friend. I didn’t drink it all but got reprimanded by my Companion for drinking it. He said, “We must keep this vehicle pure by not introducing toxic substances”. I saw a visual of my liver and understood. Though just a small amount, alcohol can dramatically shift one’s energy. I could see the diversion of energy into channels surrounding the liver while my body was processing the alcohol.

Dream: New Assignment

I struggled to sleep (not surprising after alcohol intake) and when I did sleep it was deep and restful with few dreams. However, this morning I awoke in the early morning feeling “alerted” to something. At the same time my crown chakra was buzzing.

I returned to sleep and had a dream where I entered a classroom full of high school students. I had no idea where I was but knew I was a “new” teacher at this large school. I remember another teacher came in and took over the class, allowing me to help students individually. I felt like the “co-teacher” or “assistant”.

While I was helping a student a female teacher entered the room and confronted me. “Who are you? Are you new here?” I told her I was. She began to tease me in a nice way, laughing and trying to be friendly. She invited me to lunch and I declined, feeling a bit out of my element.

There were two male teachers there as well. They also teased me, making remarks one would make to a newcomer. All was in fun and none taken the wrong way by me.

I could not for the life of me remember why I was there or where I came from. I went into the halls to find the administration and figure out how I got there and where I was. The halls did not resemble a school, though, and I wandered to a waiting area where others sat on comfy couches. I went to the front desk and was told to “Take a number”. I reached for a number but had thick gloves on so it slipped, but it was the number 8.

Then I ended up going to lunch with some others and had a dream within a dream of encountering a dark black wall which I climbed to the top of. It was nasty, like made of sludge. When I got back they had already called my number and I was told I had to draw another one. I showed them my number 8 and they accepted it. I then asked where I was and saw a planet hologram floating in front of me. It was large and resembled Earth but had a very large, dark spot on it similar to Jupiter’s spot only black or dark gray. I got confused as memory tried to surface. I recalled this planet clearly for a moment and then the memory vanished.

Message: Reassignment

When I woke I questioned the dream I had and what was going on. There came into my mind the image of symbols on a gray metal-like surface. I recognized it instantly as a ship and the symbols were familiar. I somehow knew this was not my Home ship so I asked where it was. I saw a planet with numerous rings around it and knew it was Saturn. I saw that the ship I had visited hid inside the rings, becoming a part of them so as to not be detected. I also heard, “Ashtar” which I instantly tossed from my mind assuming it was just my conscious mind interfering.

I thought I was done but more information came. The dark spot I saw on the planet in my dream was symbolic of the “dark”. I understood “dark” to mean negative energy but really it is the “misuse of energy”. The dark spot was over a specific region of Earth and I wish I could remember it better but I want to say it covered all of North American and part of Central America. I don’t know if there are more dark spots (likely) but this was the area I was shown. This is the area where I am located so it makes sense that I was shown this.

It appears that I have been “reassigned” and so was being introduced to a new “crew”. When I questioned this I was told it is a “ground crew”. “We spend most of our time on the surface” was the response I received to what this ground crew is. My dream was symbolic of my introduction to my new crew and new assignment.

There is also a faint memory of an individual, a man, who came forward to introduce himself. He presented to me a hand-written message which promptly disappeared as soon as I tried to focus on it. He was speaking as I read it so I was able to hear him say, “I am…...52“.

Because I was told this ship resides within the rings of Saturn as it observes Earth, I was curious if anyone else had received this information. I found an article that confirmed my suspicions almost right away. I also looked up Ashtar but I don’t know how I feel about it yet. Something about the information I read does not resonate with me so I am inclined to distance myself from this link until it does resonate. Perhaps the reason it doesn’t resonate is because this is “new” territory for me.

For those of you who don’t normally follow my blog, you should know that I do not seek out information via books or the internet unless I am led to do so. Therefore, I do not have background information on Ashtar or motherships in Saturn’s rings. I have in fact never considered the rings of Saturn to be anything other than a debris field.

The Owl and its Connection to ET Experiences

My totem for as long as I can remember has been the owl. The Great Horned Owl to be exact.

Some of my earliest memories are of playing with my grandmother’s owl figurine as a child. I was always drawn to it and touched it whenever I saw it.

When I was around 8 years old my father was driving in his black Porsche with me and my two sisters. He liked showing it off and we took a drive at night on a familiar country road.

Out of the blue a large bird flew into the front of his car. It hit so hard my father stopped to check for damage – both of his car and the bird. He went into the ditch to see what he had hit. I had a strange feeling at the time, like I was scared something would happen. My dad laughed his hearty laugh and said, “Look! I hit an owl!” He held up the massive bird by it’s feet, which was still alive and just stunned. I looked on in both curiosity and horror, standing back and away from my dad because the owl suddenly woke up and began flapping its massive wings. My dad yelled out and let go of the bird and it flew away. I can still hear the sound of its wings. The memory is one of my most vivid memories of my early childhood.

When I lived in Montana we had a family of Great Horned Owls living near the house. They would perch on the top of our roof and look at us – Mom, dad, and three babies. They also would leave us pellets which always seemed to be right where we would walk. They stayed the entire time we lived there, which was about a year, and I saw the babies grow up. No matter the season, there they would be seemingly watching all the time.

Even more recent, but probably a good four years ago, I had an incident where I was driving home alone at night and had to stop because a Great Horned Owl was just sitting in the middle of the road looking at me. It was right in front of the entrance to my driveway, so I didn’t have to slam on my breaks. I sat and looked at him for quite some time. He also looked at me, just staring at me. What was even stranger is that there was a strange fog that night which settled around the owl making him look almost like an apparition. I remember thinking he must have something to tell me, but I don’t recall getting any messages.

I turned into my driveway after a good while of back and forth staring and saw him fly away.

Owls and ET Experiences

Only recently have these memories surfaced. I actually read about how owls can be indicators that one has had an ET abduction. I read this in Keepers of the Garden by Dolores Cannon. She mentions how often owls are used to hide an abduction memory. The owl memory gives the human mind something to focus on and distracts from the true experience and memory. She then hypnotizes Phil whose own experience begins with having to stop suddenly because of a huge owl.

Reading this, I began to wonder about my own owl experiences. I quickly tossed the consideration that maybe they were shielding my own ET encounters. No way could that have happened to me!

Then I stumbled quite coincidentally upon a book by an ET Experiencer called, The Messengers: Owls, Synchronicity and the UFO Abductee. I haven’t read the book yet and am not sure if I plan to, but the book is about the author’s  experiences with owls and their connection to ET abductions and contact. This, of course, I could not ignore. Here I had been reading about owls and had thought maybe it may be applicable to me and had just tossed that reasoning. Now to find yet another hint that maybe, just maybe my owl encounters have been more than what they appear.

1989

My mind has been going back to the summer of 1989, when I was only 12 years old and that strange, eerily calm and quiet night when I saw the UFO right over top me. My memory of seeing it is so clear and the awe I felt returns as if I am living it again. I don’t know why I wasn’t afraid. I was the exact opposite. I was thrilled and excited yet all I could do was stare and I did not, could not move. No beam was upon me, that I recall, but I was staring into a very, very, large, round, white light. It was one of about five total that were on the bottom of the craft which was directly above me. It was centered right over me!

Yet I have no other memory of the experience except for the awe I felt, the bottom of the huge craft, the lights, and what seems to be an endless amount of time just staring up at it. I don’t remember any communication or abduction, just the UFO and the intense white light.

When I finally broke from the trance-like rapture I was in, I went inside to get anyone to come see. My mom came but when we got outside it had gone and I saw it in the distance. I pointed it out but my mom did not believe me. I watched it dart away at an angle but she had already turned her head to go inside. Such a bummer!

Could it be that I have experienced other such encounters and they have just been wiped from my memory? With all the odd memory lapses I have been having lately I am starting to think it is very likely.

 

 

Dream: Light Language Transmission

I finally slept pretty soundly last night. I had many, many dreams containing more information than my conscious mind was able to retain. Thankfully, I did retain some and my Companion helped me access it.

Dream: Light Language Transmission

This dream was long, so I will condense it.

I was visiting with a group of people living in a commune-type setting. It was families sharing everything and they were very tight knit. I was learning of their daily routine and my husband and I were considering joining them.

At one point they were telling me how they lost a member of their group. I felt very sad for them and told them I would help. I got down on my knees in this golden space (alter maybe?) and looked up at the sun which was at about 10 o’clock in the sky. I began to sing a lovely song that was very alien in its sound. It was nothing like I had ever sung and the melody was strange yet beautiful. As I sang the song which consisted of words and syllables I was unfamiliar with, I saw a golden light come out of me and connect with the sun in the sky. Within the light were symbols streaming out of me and up. They were golden also and shimmered in the light.

I had such a peaceful feeling while singing but something about my song connected me to these people I was with and I felt an overwhelming love and sympathy for the loss of their loved one. All I wanted to do was help them.

My husband did not want to stay with these people so we chose to leave, which saddened me for they felt like family to me now. As I said my goodbyes, three women dressed in simple dress, stood in a line to see me off. I went to each of them and gave them a hug and a kiss. I felt myself crying as I did.

Message

When I awoke I immediately recognized the song as light language and was surprised that it had come out of me. I also knew I had sent it, or transmitted it, to an individual far, far away as a means to “bring them back” from being lost from their family. I don’t remember what I sang but I finally understood what light language is. It is a connection established between one (or many) consciousness and another. It is purely telepathic so no words could ever actually translate, only an emotion or an overall sense of the message.

Space Craft and Being

I fell back into the in-between thinking of this and saw suddenly that I was hovering inside some sort of space craft and I was not alone. The craft was a circular, domed disc. It was vast, spreading out around me and covered with symbols similar to what I had just seen in my dream. I was hovering over a window that looked down onto a galaxy far below. It looked like a partial swirl of stars and dust. I knew instantly that I was in space on board a ship and that I had been there before.

With me was my Companion. He asked me to look down at the swirling mass of stars below me. He said, “That is You”. A tiny star stood out more brightly than the rest. I understood this to mean this star was Earth.

We conversed for quiet sometime. Him telling me that They wanted me to Remember and that this was a test to see how much I could handle. I could see him, or parts of him, and knew he was not human in appearance. He was much, much taller than I and very pale, with long, spindly arms and legs and a bulbous mid-section which was hard for me to make out. His head was elongated without any visible hair and his facial features were very small in comparison. He had massive eyes that took up the majority of his facial area. They were dark blue (like the eyes of a newborn baby) and slanted upward toward his temples. I do not recall seeing any whites, only the bluish color. His nose was very small and petite, but it was there, and his mouth was similar in size to his nose with no discernible lips.I did not see any ears. It was hard to tell what color he was in the light (it was dark) but he appeared light in complexion, so I suspect he was either light gray or blue in color.

I contracted from this image at first but felt no fear so stopped and took a closer look.

The most vivid aspect of him were his hands. They were very thin, with long fingers that had overly large pads on them. It was almost like he had frog fingers. I asked about them and he said, “Our senses are not like yours. We have a supremely developed sense of touch”. I saw that he used touch to control the ship and saw an electric blue energy that ran through the ship in what appeared to be “veins”. I knew then that the ship had consciousness and that he was tapped into or a part of that consciousness.

I asked many questions as I hovered there over the window overlooking our solar system. He told me that They stayed far from the Earth so as to not be detected. The ship was indeed “alive” and the symbols inscribed all over it were the same symbols that I saw in my dream. The ship itself communicated with those on Earth who were receptive to it. Similarly, those on board the ship (connected with the ship) also communicated with those on Earth who were receptive. It was like a mass consciousness circuit between the ship, those on the ship and those on Earth. I was and am still in awe! So this is what Light Language is! It is US communicating with Them and their ships!

I asked about his body and where he was. He told me that his body is not like ours. He said it is composed of energy but would feel solid to the touch. This is/was hard for me to understand. Eventually, after several questions and answers, I concluded that he is either a 4D or 5D Being.

What was the most concerning to me was that this Being was in fact my Companion. I have no doubt of this. He explained that his consciousness and mine had been interlinked but that he continues his commitments/activities in this craft as well as other areas all at the same time. He can do this easily and without much concentration. This is very amazing to me.

I once again saw the 3D plane set out in front of me. It again had objects and markers on it. He said to me, “We need you to Remember your mission now”. I did not and do not remember it despite being in awe of this experience. I was told more was to come which indicates to me that my reaction was appropriate.

There is so much more I was told, but I am still digesting it all. I will share it as I feel comfortable.

Meditation Reveals More

I had a chance yesterday afternoon to meditate for a little while. I was exhausted from not getting good sleep, so it was a nice reprieve.

Meditation Revelations

I focused on my third eye and heart which were not very responsive but did eventually respond. In the last couple of days my connection has been interrupted by my overemotional reaction to the soul retrieval work I unintentionally recalled. It brought tons of fear and old emotion to the surface.

My Companion brought with him a counseling energy as we discussed what was going on with me.

“It’s time to be decisive. Your considerations are noted. We are aware that you are not fully comfortable with that which has been presented thus far. It is important, however, to trust that which you have been given as it comes fully from Source. Before you can move onto your next step your mind must be focused, not distracted by Ego-driven questions or influenced by Ego-driven, illogical emotional outbursts”.

I spend some time mulling over what it is that is bothering me so much about what I have Remembered. It isn’t so much the upset caused by my soul retrieval work. I can handle emotional heaviness as it has been a burden I agreed to carry this life. What is bothering me is a feeling that whatever awaits me on the next step is enough to throw my current life and relationships into a tailspin. I have had similar big shifts in my life long ago and so the fear of such a change holds me back from wanting to see whatever it is that I am meant to.

Yet I know there is no going back and that my resistance only makes the next step that much more challenging and upsetting. I also know that I tend to overreact prematurely to the feeling of the upcoming change. Likely it is not as bad as it appears.

I Stay Behind

I fell into the in-between at some point and found myself walking down gray, stone steps. I felt to be descending into an underground room or similar. My awareness kicked in when there came over me a heavy, gentle energy that swayed me towards unconsciousness.

I immediately knew my Companion was taking me deep into my subconscious. What would have happened next is unknown to me because I woke and reprimanded him for trying to subdue me in such a way. I want to be conscious of what is going on!

There was a realization of what we were discussing then. I asked questions I already knew the answers to. Questions about the time when They would come retrieve those who were to be saved from the inevitable cataclysms in Earth’s future. I wondered if I would go, too, and instantly knew I was to stay behind. I knew why, even though I didn’t want to know. I was to stay to help gather as many as possible for the evacuation, to help them see, to help them to not be afraid. I would stay because that is what I do. I help.

This is definitely not something my Ego wanted to hear or know. But I am OK with it. There are many, many others like myself who will stay. Many of us who volunteered for this task will stay behind. There will so much to do here and Earth will not be a complete loss. We will rebuild it. And I love Earth. It feels like my child; like a part of me. I could never leave it.

This is not all in one lifetime. In this I Remembered why I will have two more lives here after this one. I had secretly hoped to get out of those lives and was reminded that I could choose to finish what I started here somewhere else. Unlike many of my Starseed brothers and sisters, I chose to create karma and have some repayment left. I felt and was similarly advised that Earth was the best and quickest option for settling those debts (I am almost done!). Specifically I heard, “Why stop now when we have come so far?” and saw a vision of marathon route and knew I only had a few miles left to go.

We Won’t Give Up

I felt and still feel the combined goal of those of my kind – the Starseeds. We came here because we love Earth and everything that she is – the good and the bad. We see her potential above all else and the potential of mankind as well. In this there is a combined effort to make sure she is not destroyed.

We won’t give up on her.

Prompting from My Team

After yesterday’s sudden memory of dreamtime work, I found myself struggling with massive heart chakra fluctuations. I would go from feeling normal to suddenly being very emotional. I busied myself baking Christmas cookies for most of the day to avoid it, but there was always a feeling that my attention was needed elsewhere. There came with it an urge to sit at the computer and write, but I was afraid of what would come out.

Night Brings Memory

I desperately wanted to sleep and wake to a new day, but it seems that was not meant to be. I tossed and turned for a good three hours before I finally slept. In that time I would often slip into the in-between; on the edge of sleep and wakefulness. It was like when I crossed that “line” there was a floodgate opened and all that transpired previously – my “other” work – would return.

The memories would wake me up with a start and I would ask they be removed and they would. Yet some remained, enough for me to feel the urgency behind them and the prompting from my Team to allow these memories to remain.

Thankfully, I fell asleep and do not recall much of my dreams. I do remember once again being a teacher of children, this time high school aged. I felt very calm and composed despite their misbehavior. It is like I transformed into a much wiser, more patient guide to them compared to my actual time teaching in the physical.

I awoke much too early for my liking – 5:30. I felt immediately the presence of my Team. One was close and persistent. I would fall into the in-between and it seemed like he would slip into my consciousness symbols and memories. One such symbols I saw looked like a large pecan. I thought, “pecan” and was corrected by him – “chromosome”. I recognized the similarity and almost laughed but then got upset because I knew what he was trying to do. He was trying to get me to remember something and I was set against it.

Another memory came to me in a very detailed image of blueprints. They appeared to be blueprints for the building of some kind of machine. It was curious and I knew it belonged to a type of aircraft and that part of the blueprints included the platform on which it would land. I was curious but then again pushed it away as if yelling, “No!” Yet the memory remains solid in my mind even now.

As I tried to settle into my heart center I felt this assistant nearby. I received communication from him on behalf of my Team. “We want you to Remember. It is of the utmost importance”.

I do want to, but then I don’t. I am conflicted.

I received communication that I would Remember. I was told I would be “visited”. I am not sure what that means nor do I really care. I can request it be saved in my subconscious to be remembered later.

Prompting 

Though I do not open the doors to the full communication, I can feel what it is They want me to do. They want me to fully accept what I Know and am Remembering. This includes sharing it with others. The reason I feel urged to write is to share what I am experiencing and Remembering. This is part of my mission here. It is meant to be more involved than I am allowing it to be.

I have a strong draw to connect with others like myself. At first I was just reading other blogs and websites and perusing Facebook. Now, though, I am feeling a strong urge to connect with certain groups and people – meaning send them emails or telephone them. I resist, though, because to connect with these group and people means I am accepting my experiences and knowingness fully. I am not sure I am there yet. Some of these groups and people are very “out there” in their beliefs and experiences. There are contactees, abductees, Starseeds, channelers, and others. I am drawn to them very strongly. I feel like I have to talk to them, but about what I have no idea.

Shifting into Alternate Dimensions

I wanted to add one more thing before I forget again. The reason I am struggling to fall asleep is that as I slip into the in-between I feel a strangeness come over me. It is an odd feeling that I cannot describe and it unsettles me. It reminds me of previous experiences I have had where I feel that pieces of me are leaving or returning. It scares me but really I should not be scared. When I feel this fear my Ego driven consciousness awakens and the feeling subsides. But it returns as soon as I near sleep.

I am told I am shifting into alternate dimensions. I cross over the veil or whatever it is that divides this world from the next. The feeling is my energy body moving out of my physical body but not in the way that is usual with an OBE. There are no vibrations like with OBE. It is subtler and hard for me to understand. It has to do with a new ability I have not fully awakened to (I am doing it but it has not fully integrated with this consciousness yet) and the crystalline body is involved.

When I shift is when the memories come flooding in. I feel different when this happens. Like I am me but I am not me. I suspect this feeling is my Companion taking the pilot seat and me stepping back. Except that I don’t step back. I freak out when the Knowingness and the strange feeling takes over.

I will say that the urges I am feeling to connect with others like myself and to speak up about what I am going through are getting stronger and stronger. I almost blurted out to my husband, “I am talking to aliens” but held back this morning because I was not ready to get into a long dialogue about it. But I suspect I will eventually blurt out something soon enough if this urgency, this prompting of such intensity, continues.

I know why I am so resistant. The urgency and the intensity of it scares me. I feel unable to control it and the things I Remember and experience. This creates fear and resistance from the Ego and is in the way. I am told I will “relinquish”. Probably. They are always right.

 

Dream Work Remembered

After writing my last post, I kept feeling like I needed to write more, but I didn’t know what or why. I had a strange feeling following me, so I decided to go grocery shopping for Christmas cookie ingredients to get clear my head.

On the way home I had an unexpected vision of the Earth as if viewing it from space. When I saw it, I felt an intense sadness and suffocating grief come over me.

Then I remembered why.

Dream Work: Assisting the Preparation

All at once I remembered what I had been doing in my dreams. Early in the night I awakened from the most intensely emotionally disturbing dream ever. Thankfully the dream is almost completely erased from my mind. Images remain, as does the intense emotion and the memory of where it came from and why.

The images are of people of various ages and genders. I didn’t know any of them but there were hundreds, maybe thousands. I was trying to help them, trying to calm them down. They were all in despair and suffering from various stages of shock. Some were missing body parts. Others were injured in other ways such as abrasions on their face, hands, legs and arms. Some were looking for loved ones.

The scene they were coming out of was full of dust and debris making it hard for me to see. It seemed like a massive explosion or some kind of disaster area. I don’t know what happened whether it was an explosion or something else. All I know is what I saw and the intense emotion I felt for the people I was trying to help. I became so involved in what I was doing that I began to confuse them for people I know in my life. This is why I believe I became so distraught. I had been reminded to “remain objective” the day before. Had I done that I would not have taken on the emotion and pain all around me.

It felt like I had visited Hell in my sleep.

Relief Given

When I awoke I was crying in heaving sobs. My nose was so clogged and my pillow so wet that I must have been crying for a while. I don’t remember much of what happened when I woke except that I was aware that something horrible was going to happen and I didn’t want to feel what I was feeling. I asked to sleep, and so I returned to sleep quite quickly. Apparently I also was relieved of my memory because when I got up this morning I had absolutely no conscious memory of this at all (not the dream, not my tears or wet pillow – nothing). Just an odd feeling that was bothering me.

Memory Recovered

When all this came back to me on the drive home I was hit with such despair that I almost couldn’t breathe. My Companion took it away, though, just by saying, “It’s okay”. I felt the warm, loving energy come into my heart and spread out and I heaved a sigh of relief. But it was too late to avoid the memory. I had it back.

I instantly knew what I had been doing in my dream. I was assisting people who would be involved in a crisis that would end their lives. I instantly knew they were “preparing” – that they knew this is what they had agreed to. I am not sure why I was assisting but it was overwhelming to my Earth consciousness.

I cried when I saw the Earth in my vision because I feel loss for it. The feeling is what I would image I would feel if my own child were taken from me and destroyed right in front of my eyes.

I understand why I felt so weird this morning, now. I don’t want to scare anyone, but after this memory and experience and the emotion of it, I feel again that sense that time is running out.

There was also a strange feeling that there will come a time when I will “speak for them”. It is like They will make themselves known and people will be afraid and I, and others like me, will speak on their behalf to help calm people and explain why they came.

Honestly, when this kind of information comes to me and in such a way as this I think I must have woken up inside a movie or something. It is so bizarre. What the heck is going on?