Category Archives: Messages

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Dream: Full Moon Man

I had a particularly odd dream this morning in which I was being given information about some things to come.

Dream: Gym

The dream started out inside a truck. I was sitting next to my husband who was pulling milk crate from the floor. It contained his gym clothes. I told him, “Good idea!” and he pulled out a crate for me containing my gym clothes.

We walked across a field. In front of me I could see a large lake and a few buildings to my right. We headed to one of the buildings. It was the gym, but it was very small.

I went inside and found the gym completely packed with people. There were so many people that I could not get to the dressing room. I stood against the wall watching and feeling a bit claustrophobic. A gym employee was there and I commented about how crowded it was for a Sunday. I thought perhaps I had come during a class. The gym employee just stood there but I received the thought that people just had to take turns.

I left the building, telling the employee that I would go to the larger gym where there was more space. I ran into my husband who was wearing swimming goggles and told him my decision. He agreed. The employee asked which gym we would go to. I said, “The one in Copperas Cove”. In the dream I wondered to myself, “Is there a gym there?” I convinced myself there was, recalling a dream in which I went to the Wal-Mart there. I thought, “It’s right next to the Wal-Mart”. This, is not true. There is no gym there!

Dream: Full Moon Man

As we turned to go, the scene shifted and I was standing beside a crystal clear creek. A man was talking with me about a dam. I looked at the stream and saw a small dam was built over it. The dam had some kind of system in it that reversed the flow of the stream. The man told me, “Man has dammed up all the streams. He should not do this”. I looked upstream at the lake it was coming out of and leaned down and put my hands into the stream, taking a drink of the cold water. It was so wonderful!

I was instructed to pay attention and the man continued to discuss with me how mankind had altered the environment and if he does not reverse this damage, Mother Earth will do so herself. He told me that Earth is much like a living organism and needs to be preserved. He directed my attention back at the dam and he said, “All this to make this” and held up what looked like a kitchen scrubber. I didn’t know how to react to this, I just listened.

My attention was then drawn to a woman who was walking in the stream. She was eating orange ice cream and serving it to children. They acted like they were at an event, like the 4th of July. She looked up and so did I. There was a long cable stretched across the lake and coming down on a zip line was a man in a moon costume.

The moon was very large and full and it looked to be covered in white fur. The man was smiling and yelling as he zipped down the line toward the opposite bank. I saw him and wondered why he was in the costume.

Messages

I was awakened by my son yelling for his daddy but the man from my dream, the one who was teaching me, was nearby. It was the old man with the beard.

He explained that there was to be a great cataclysm. I told him, “I don’t want to hear about doom and gloom”. Yet, he continued. I drifted into the in-between and heard about the Bahamas and the recent damage and life lost. I acknowledged this as I came to full awareness.

He said, “You will be called” I had heard this already and somewhat ignored him.

But I saw a vision of people stepping into what looked like individual shower stalls without doors. They were rectangular, white boxes with one side open to allow for a human to step inside. When the human got inside, a yellowish light appeared. It did not come from above but from the center of the person inside. It intensified and the person seemed to break into a million-trillion particles of light. I did not see the person but only the light.

I had slipped into the in-between without knowing it and this vision caused me to say, “The men will be most affected” or something of the sort. This brought me to full awareness but I somehow knew why I had said that. I knew the light show I had just seem would be an spiritually orgasmic-type of experience and that men would be overcome by it faster than woman. I am not sure why I thought this, though.

I also heard that incidents of testicular cancer would increase.

Then I heard him say, “Your body is a living hologram” With it came an understanding that this reality is a physical hologram and like a hologram it is merely energy and can be transformed. Is this what I saw in the vision?

I do not know how to take what I was shown. It is literal or was this just a symbolic showing of what would happen? Is this the rapture? And why am I being shown this? What good will it do?

I then remembered my full moon dream and recalled that I was told a while back to expect another activation in October that coincided with the full moon. I felt a confirmation with this and then a wave of pleasant energy entered through my heart space from my back and reverberated through my body, filling especially my root and second chakras will a warm, pleasant feeling.

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Remember, It’s an Experience

I wanted to share with you the insight I received yesterday.

An expected delivery arrived at our home and it was soon learned that there would be a significant fee, like a COD, in order to receive the shipment. This was unexpected and upset me. I began to feel the familiar upset rising from within and so extracted myself from the situation as soon as I could. Thankfully my husband was able to handle it for me.

Once inside, I was thinking about the situation and heard quite suddenly, “Remember, it’s an experience”. With this I realized the truth in this statement. An experience is just that – an experience. It does not imply preference for one outcome or another. It is simply “the contact with and observation of facts and events”.

It is I who was applying a preference for one outcome or another. With this application invariably comes either disappointment or acceptance and the varying feelings that go along with each.

Through expectation I submit myself to becoming the effect of my experience. I did not have to do that.

With this revelation, I removed myself from any expectation and felt the upset vanish immediately. There was such an emotional release that I began to laugh out loud as I prepared dinner.

I am so very grateful to my Companion for his simple reminder to me. What a difference it made!

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Percolation and Transmutation All Over Again

Percolate. Transmute. Rinse. Repeat.

The energy peaks, then subsides. Peaks. Subsides. Peaks. Subsides.

You get the idea.

This is the process that raises one’s vibration. It is slow and intentional. It is the reason we feel so often like we are on a roller coaster. Yet, if you have noticed, the roller coaster feeling has lessened. The intense high’s and low’s are leveling out.

Our cycles are changing as well. Our physical body cycles such as our sleep cycle, dream cycle, circadian rhythm, and biorhythms are changing. This is also true of Mother Earth and can be seen in nature such as shifts in migration patterns, weather cycles, and ocean currents. 

We are also practicing, preparing, for a different shift, one into a higher vibration, a peak vibration, which has yet to arrive. There is talk that we have entered into 5D. In actuality, the shift into 5D is individual and not a “mass event”. What in fact has occurred is that we have reached a point in vibration where we now have access to 5D, when before the highest we could sustain was 4D. Just having access does not, however, mean that we live there nor does it mean we are even capable of sustaining this level of vibration for long periods of time.

I am told very, very few are able to access this vibration at this time and those who do, do so with significant assistance.

What is important here is that 5D is now accessible to the human biological organism via its operating components. In other words, a specific number of those occupying human bodies have recovered ability enough to access this vibration now.

Do not focus on whether you yourself have entered yet into this vibration for that is not the concern nor will it ever be. Focus instead on the progress you have made; the leaps and bounds in spiritual evolution you have made and the ones you will yet to make. This is to be celebrated. 

Many of you have reached a point in your transition where you are attending “class”, for lack of a better descriptive word. Your memory of these events will be limited, though some will have full awareness of their attendance. These classes are initiations that will act as triggers for movement into 5D. In these classes you will practice crossing dimensions and the maintenance of multiple dimensional experience, the results of which will prepare you for the transition into higher states of awareness and Being.  

Your Star brothers and sisters are already celebrating the coming of the Great Age when they (we) will finally be reunited. There is great joy in your hearts, in our hearts, as we come ever closer to this reunion. Enjoy this moment for it is one that has been anticipated for many a millennia.

Note: This post was not intended to be a channel but became such as it was written. I have not edited it to show where I speak and the collective speak. The experience of writing it is curious to me because as it flowed out of me my heart chakra felt to be moving up into my throat and out beyond the limits of my body. I literally felt my energy “rising up” into my third-eye and crown in the moments that the collective came through and my entire body began to vibrate. An amazing feeling!

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It Has Begun

I’ve been up since 3:30am.

I was having a cool semi-lucid dream where I was running along a country road alone in the evening. The sun was setting and I decided to turn around before it got too dark. As I turned, I saw a mother javelina (wild pig) with her piglets. I avoided her, knowing they can be fierce.

As I ran I saw another mother pig and her babies. And another after that. One turned around and acted like she was going to follow me. I made a huffing noise at her to keep her at bay. Then I stopped and decided to confront her. I turned toward her and that is when I was awakened.

I heard my guide say, “It has begun”.

I heard the song, “Age of Aquarius” and began singing it in my head. I couldn’t get it out of my head.

Not interested in waking up, I told my guide to please let me just dream the message. I said, “I want to sleep”.

As I began to drift, I heard, “On the eve of the full moon”.

This woke me again. I knew the entire message was to expect something to begin on the eve of the full moon. “Is this considered the eve or is it tomorrow night?”, I wondered to myself.

Settling, I began to drift off again.

I heard, “Veinte-four”.

I knew this meant, “24” and wondered why they said it in partial Spanish. What is with me always hearing Spanish?

I drifted once again and heard, “There is a test in 24 hours. Are you ready?”.

I awoke, and responded, “I guess so”. Then I told this voice (I didn’t recognize it), “Please let me sleep”.

Again, I drifted.

Then very distinctly I heard, “A second wave is coming”.

“What?” I thought back, wide awake yet again.

“What does this wave mean? What is going to happen?” I wondered.

Restless, I began to drift again.

Then I heard very clearly, “Re-Creation – the fruits of hybridization”.

Awake yet again I caught the phrase thought, “That sounds like something Bashar would say”.

I tried to go back to sleep but felt that I needed to write it all down. “Maybe then you will let me sleep?” I thought.

After writing it down, I tried to sleep but couldn’t. I felt the urge to just get up and write down my questions and the answers I received. I chose not to, hoping instead that I would get some sleep.

“Why are you doing this?” I asked.

“To prepare you”, he said.

“Okay, okay, I’m prepared already!” I thought back to him. “Can I please get some sleep now?”

“You don’t need sleep”, I heard in response to my thought. For some reason I knew this to be true.

Then I asked, “When is the next ‘wave’?”

I heard, “January”.

I felt I should write it down. I didn’t and told my Team (who I could feel distinctly by this time), “I will remember it when I write down the message about the second wave”. I nearly forgot it despite this, though.

Continuing, my thoughts went back to the information I had just received. I knew these “waves” were waves of energy that contained messages, or “transmissions”.  In response to this memory, I was told these transmissions act as memory triggers for the Starseeds. With this, I saw the familiar vision of millions of tiny stars falling to the Earth – not meteorites but Beings from the stars. I asked, “How many [Starseeds] are there?” I heard back, “4 million”.

Unfortunately, I did not get back to sleep. My youngest awoke and began to run through the hallway screaming and running into doors in anger. I had to get up and hold him. I wondered as I held him if he was a Starseed. Perhaps he is receiving the transmissions, too? Maybe that is why he is so clingy and possessive of me. He thinks he is going to lose me.

I tickled his tiny toes and snuggled up against him for the next 45 minutes as he drank his bottle and played with my hands, clasping and unclasping my finger. “There is nothing more wonderful than this”, I thought. “Perfection”.

A Sign

Later in the morning, after I had long given up on sleep, I saw something tiny on the floor. Curious, I picked it up. It was a teeny, tiny perfectly square piece of paper. On it was printed a triangle and inside it was the number 5. I thought about it being significant but then nearly threw it out, thinking I must be making it up. Yet I had the feeling it was significant in some way. So I snapped a picture of it and posted it to FB.

Not long after I posted it, I received input from a friend. She said the 5 could be for the 5th dimension but also that the symbol could be something called the Yahyel – the 5th hybrid race, each one represented by a triangle. She explained that it came from Bashar whose civilization is the 3rd hybrid race.

You can’t get anymore confirmation than that now can you? Wow.

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Thoughts on Revelation

I read the book of Revelation a few days ago. This is what came to me while I was reading it.

Numbers Everywhere!

There are significant amounts of numbers presented in the book. Specifically the numbers 7, 12 (3), and 4.

Seven

There are not only 7 churches in the book, but also seven Spirits, seven golden candlesticks, seven stars, 7 horns, 7 eyes, 7 seals, 7 trumpets, etc (there is a lot of this number!). This stood out to me right away. Why the number 7? What is it’s significance? And most importantly, why did I just have a dream in which I was to take 7 tests, the first of which I was in the process?

My first thought it to find out what Numerology says about 7. My next thought was to look up in my blog how often this number appeared – it is a lot! I even wrote an entire post devoted to the number. What is even stranger is that the number appeared to me in the leaves of a tree once, perfectly outlined and obvious. Finally, though, the number corresponds to the number of chakras of the human body.

The number 7 is about seeking Truth and spiritual completion. I think it no coincidence that this number also corresponds to the number of chakras in the human body. The Kundalini energy that many are experiencing right now is specifically the “waking up” and alignment of these energy centers. The ultimate goal of which is ascension or the recognition of one’s Truth (wholeness and re-unification with the Higher Self).

Twelve or Three (1+2=3)

I noticed this number second the the number 7. It did not stand out to me or cause a spiritual pause like the 7 did. However, I did recognize it to correspond to my experiences with my Council. My Council has 12 members typically.

Twelve can also be simplified into 3 by adding together its individual digits. Three is more significant to me than 12 because it has also frequented my spiritual experiences (dreams, messages, etc). This is just one example of the number 3 as a message to me.

Twelve is a number of completion, of shedding the old skin and taking on the new. Three represents the physical, mental and emotional aspects of an individual. It is also known as the number representing the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.

Four

The number 4 stood out to me also, but I was especially interested int he four living creature mentions in chapter 4:

….and in the midst of the throne, and round about the throne, four living creatures full of eyes before and behind. 4:7And the first creature was like a lion, and the second creature like a calf, and the third creature had a face as of a man, and the fourth creature was like a flying eagle. 4:8and the four living creatures, having each one of them six wings, are full of eyes round about and within: and they have no rest day and night…..

I am unsure why this specific section stood out to me so much. I was/am still very interested in these four creatures for some reason. Any suggestions on why this is are welcomed.

For me, personally, the number 4 has been a pattern in my life. 4 years has been specifically the time it seems to take me to reach certain milestones in my life. Often, when I have asked my guides to tell when to expect something in my life, I am told 4 years.

Four represents stability, practicality, patience, trust, and faith. It represents Home. It is Heaven and Earth respectively.

The Seven Seals

There came to me an idea about these seals. The idea was that they correspond to the individual in that each person will unlock or open each of their own seven “seals” which in turn unlocks a corresponding aspect to be overcome. This, in itself, is the ascension process in its entirety.

I do not have this all figured out by any means, but when this idea came to me it came with such an “ah-ha” that I felt satisfied in its accuracy. Since I have yet to open all of my own “seals”, it is hard for me to identify with all seven of them. However, I can see how they align with my own experience thus far.

The first seal is merely the questioning of the old. This is the conqueror within us awakening to that which is false in the world. It is the catalyst for transformation and an essential part of the awakening process. One cannot awaken from sleep without first questioning reality. Once the question has been asked, there is no going back.

The second seal is the war within that results from the questioning. It is the dark night of the soul, it is the utter chaos that often results when one begins to take down the walls of belief they had around themselves. Questioning leads to uncomfortable truths and recognition of the reality one has been sleep walking through.

The third seal is finding balance. It is a long search and often painful one. It is a constant struggle and takes persistence and courage. We are our own judge and jury and ultimately we must recognize and take responsibility for both the good and the bad within ourselves. There is so much more to this part of the transformation, more than I have yet learned for myself.

The fourth seal is Death. It is death of the old. The killing off of the Ego. I find it significant that Revelations says 1/4 of world dies. When I have asked my Team about this first wave of ascension I have heard 1/4 of the world is a part of it. Coincidence? I doubt it.

The fifth seal speaks of rest for the faithful, or those who have already died. They must wait as they watch others go through what they did. I do not feel this has been a part of my journey yet, but it is something I am being taught to do as the Observer.

The sixth speaks of natural disaster, specifically a great earthquake, a blood moon, solar eclipse and meteors hitting the Earth (strangely all of these have recently happened). While these things may indeed occur physically, I recognized how these might correspond to physical body changes. I have felt what I can only describe as a physical body earthquake as my entire body shook, lightening-type bolts of energy, colors behind my eyes and periods of spiritual darkness. I am led to connect each of these events to my own physical manifestations of the Shift. It is interesting to me that when each of these (earthquakes, blood moons, eclipses, meteor showers) occurs, there is a huge wave of energy felt that seems to kick-start more manifestations and increase vibration.

The seventh seal speaks of even more natural disasters and more death. I am at a loss as to how this directly relates to my own transformation. However, a part of me thinks that the last two seals are for those who do not move into 4 and 5D (those left behind).

Visions and Knowingness Received

I had some strange information via knowingness and a vision while reading the Book of Revelations which I will mention briefly here.

  • I had knowing that someone of importance in the UK would be assassinated and that it would be a tipping point similar to the assassination of Franz Ferdinand was to the beginning of World War I. I at first thought it would be after Queen Elizabeth dies and that it would be whomever takes her place but then the thought of the Prime Minister popped into my head. So I don’t know which it will be as this was not clear.
  • I had a memory of an old vision of mine from 2003. I saw an area near Fort Hood in Texas completely demolished – flattened. The entire military base and surrounding cities were obliterated. The vision was so real, I was knocked to my knees and started crying. No one can forget that. This vision resurfaced in my memory as I was reading Revelations.
  • I had a sudden vision of the west coast of the US. As it unfolded, it zoomed into the state of Washington and then the word, “Vancouver” popped into my head. With that came the idea that if my family decides to move (which we have been discussing) we should move to Vancouver. There came a sudden intrigue with the idea and a total acceptance followed. I suddenly wanted very badly to visit the mountains there and I wanted my children to grow up surrounded in that beauty. There was also a feeling that it would be “safe” there because it was not in the U.S. Eeek!
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Two Dreams and a Message

I awoke yet again at 5am not very pleased that I was waking so early. I awoke hearing my guide again. This time I remember more of our conversation.

His first words to me were in response to a dream I had just had. “You are purging”.

Dream: Civil War

The dream was about being in the South during the Civil War. I was a woman who had stayed behind with other women of the family as well as some close neighbors. We were huddled inside a large, plantation-type house that was very elaborately decorated with a grand staircase and ornate wood trim in all the rooms. The war had been raging for some time and we had begun to run out of food. I had discovered some hidden in the back and had brought it to the front but was confronted by two men who followed me into the house pretending to be friendly. I knew their intent was bad and did not have a good feeling about them.

The men were wearing ragged clothing and had hungry looks in their eyes – hungry for food as well as lust hunger. The other women heard them and came down at this time.

One man saw two children and said, “You have children here?” and I became instantly worried for their safety. I thought the men intended to hurt them, specifically that they wanted to eat them. There was a horror reaction from me along with an knowing that this was not unheard of at this time in the war.

I then was not inside the body of the woman I had been and was observing. The woman said to the man, “I am sure you are tired. Why don’t you stay and rest?” When she said this, she raised up her petticoat to reveal her “knickers“. The men instantly turned and were mesmerized, their attention now on her.

Once distracted the men did not notice another woman coming around the back of them. I missed the specifics because I was focused on the woman with her knickers showing, marveling at the detail of them. They looked like tiny shorts with ruffles on the bottom and seemed very familiar to me.

The next thing I knew, a woman had surprised one of the men and he was on the floor with her on top of him. She pulled a rifled out of his pants and had it pointed at him.

That is where the dream ended.

Message Continues

Hearing my guide say I was purging, I immediately began to go through past lives I had remembered, looking for the Civil War era. I had not recalled one during the war and wondered if perhaps the dream was a recollection of a life during that time. With this thought came a feeling that this was correct, though the dream was likely a mixture of reality and symbolism.

Distracted, my guide went on:

“You have not begun reading the book of Revelations”.

I thought to myself, “No. Not really interested”.

He continued. “It will help you understand”.

I am not really interested in reading about Armageddon but I wondered why he would suddenly bring this up after I had a dream of Civil War.

The thought/feeling that came to me then was that the purging was not just happening to me – others were also experiencing it and some would not handle it too well.

I began to think of the odd thoughts I’ve been having and the past times in which I had felt on the verge of insanity. I knew not everyone would be able to handle such thoughts/feelings/memories. As more and more people began to awaken, there would be more and more instances of instability – individual and group (countries, regions).

I shrugged off these feelings, believing they had come from a video I had viewed the day before about the “end days”. Surely I was just influenced by that?

I asked to return to sleep and to receive the answer to a question I had posed: Do I really have two more lives or do these “lives” refer to a new consciousness within this life?

The answer I received was, “You already know the answer”. And I understood that I did. Two more lives then.

Burundi Bear

I fell asleep (surprise!) and had a strangely vivid dream.

I was at a river with my middle son. We were on a fishing trip. The river reminded me of one I use to frequent as a child.

Once we found a spot from which to fish, I began baiting the hook. The rod was a plain one without a reel and I only had a single length of string. I vividly recall sticking the hook into a minnow’s head and out through its mouth and then casting it several times. One time I cast it, I saw the minnow swimming near a large bass, but the fish did not strike.

I threw out the line and it went out farther than expected. It instantly pulled and I knew I had something large on it. I pulled it in, wrapping line around my wrist. I saw something orange and suspected I had snagged a carp. I told my son this and felt somewhat afraid that it was too big for me to handle.

When I finally pulled it in, it landed on some rocks. I was surprised to find that I had snagged a small bear. I ran up to it, feeling sympathetic to it. I had to free it. The hook was in its chest and it let me pull it out. I saw very clearly its little face and tiny, pointed teeth. It looked like a teddy bear but was distinctly real with orange and brown markings and a masked face. I thought, “It’s just a baby”.

I gathered it in my arms and tried to find it’s mother but it had gotten too dark. I remember calling it a “Burundi”. This is when I woke up.

When I awoke I wondered about the bear and looked it up. Turns out, Burundi is a country and the “bear” is actually a Red Panda.

I am still unsure why the name Burundi was so vivid and why I saw the Red Panda. Burundi is in chaos currently and the Red Panda is near extinction. Was this a message regarding the state of the world? I have no clue.

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Growing Pains Ahead

When I awoke this morning at 5:15am, one of my guides was close by. He very obviously was there to give me a message. I felt very alert to this, almost like I had been forewarned, though I have no memory of such a warning.

What is interesting is that he was not close but some distance away from me. In my mind I perceived him to be about the distance from my bed to the door, which would be about 8 feet away. I could not see him clearly and my first thought to him was a question, “Are you one of my Council?” The response back had a slightly amused quality to it, “No. You know who I am”.

I acknowledged he was part of my Team, but nothing more than that. I could not specifically place him, but then I usually do not try to as I get so many assistants coming through that I lose track of who is who.

With this acknowledgment came the familiar rush of energy that grows until my entire body is covered in calming chills. I just want to melt into the bed when it happens.

“What do you want?” I asked when the chills subsided.

“Your bones will hurt”, was his reply.

My initial thought was, “What?” but then I had a memory in my mind of when I was a small child and my legs would hurt so badly that my mom or grandmother would have to rub them to get them to stop hurting. They called the pain, “growing pains”.

When I had the memory and recognized it, I felt this was accurate.

The message continued. I wish I could remember it word-for-word, but as with most of the early morning messages I receive, I lose most of the specifics upon leaving bed.

In summary, though, the message was this:

My (our) DNA is altering, has been altering, with each wave of the energy that has been pouring in. The result will be changes which I have already experienced but this particular message was to warn me of new changes, changes similar to the growing pains of childhood. I am still not sure if this is literal or not, so we shall see, I guess.

I specifically heard that I need to refer to the book of Revelations and to view it with “different eyes” than when I read it in the past. I was instructed to pay attention to the symbolism and to remain unbiased as I read.

I was also told that the Earth will be completely changed in four generations time. Two of which I will be a part of (not counting this one). I know I have two more lives but hearing this in such a way at an early hour when I really didn’t want to be having a conversation about such things was not exactly welcomed. I really don’t want to focus on the fact that I am coming back to do this again two more times after this one. Sigh.

I was told I would enter my next life “aware”. I am not sure if this is a good thing or not, but okay.

In addition to this information I was left feeling an expectation of more to come. It is a very strong feeling; an intense alertness. I have had it all day, almost like I am waiting for something to fall out of the sky or a lightening bolt to hit me.

Oh and I was told, “You will remember”. Again. Yeah. I got that.

My main concern is about the “growing pains” or “bone aches”. It doesn’t sound fun. Yuck. When I had them my legs ached in the bone, literally like the bones were hurting. I suppose that at the least I can expect that my bones will literally ache.

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Wide Open

I had a realization yesterday. While at yet another meeting, I began feeling anxious and panicky for no reason whatsoever. Yes, I was at a meeting and expected to voice my two cents, but it was nothing out of the ordinary and usually I am quite relaxed at such meetings. So the anxiety was out of place.

I thought at first there must be geomagnetic storms or something causing the anxiety but something didn’t feel right about that conclusion. I felt I should inspect the feeling more and recognized that I had increases in the anxious feeling when I would focus one whomever was talking.

Was I perhaps picking up on their energy?

That was when the idea came to me to surround myself in protection; to block the energies coming in from all around me.

I visualized an egg-shaped shield of protection around my body while focusing my energy into the ground and out through my crown chakra. When I did this, I unintentionally put up the violet flame. I don’t normally do this. Honestly, I don’t remember the last time I put up an energy shield and I don’t recall ever using the violet flame. In fact, I didn’t consciously think, “I invoke the violet flame”. I just noticed that the shield I had erected around me was a pinkish-purple color and the words “violet flame” popped into my head.

Taking deep breaths I left the shield in place and focused my full attention back on the meeting. My heart rate dropped significantly and my breathing settled. I no longer had anxious thoughts when just moments before I had thought, “I am going to pass out” or “I need to get out of here”.

The rest of the day was similarly clouded with anxious thoughts that made no sense. I did not take the time to put the shield in place as I was too distracted and had already forgotten about my experience in the meeting. I had another meeting at the end of the day which had me a bundle of nerves and no matter how I tried to settled (I even stopped to meditate) the nerves would not calm down. I knew in my heart there was no reason for my concern but I seemed unable to control the anxiety over this meeting because my boss had not told me why we were having it.

At the meeting I soon discovered that my intuition had been right. There was no need for the worry. I was being called in for a consult! Haha!

You are Wide Open

I had a headache most of the day that came and went along with the strange changes in mood. I just felt off-kilter most of the day and could not wait to settle down to sleep. Except, like all of my nights this week, I could not fall asleep. I was tired but wide awake and alert for no reason. Thankfully my thoughts were not ridden with negative visions or strange concerns.

As I lay there trying to meditate I focused on my third-eye and heart simultaneously. When I did, I suddenly saw this odd pattern of energy dancing around me. I recognized it as my aura but it was unlike any visual I have ever had of my energy body. It was in waves of pink and indigo and was moving in and out and through me very quickly like electricity. I could see tendrils of color oscillating across my line of sight. It was absolutely spectacular.

As I recognized what I was seeing, a question began to form in my mind. Before the thought was completed my Companion said to me, “You are wide open”.

With this came an understanding that the current process I was going through was causing this sudden openness to everything that I had previously been closed off to. It was like I had returned to my youth, a period when I was bombarded with similar unwanted feelings and found it difficult to cope. But this time I knew how to shield myself but had gotten lazy over time because it had become second-nature. Apparently I could not rely on the shield just automatically being there right now. It would take specific intention to keep myself shielded from unwanted emotion, energy and negative feedback.

Thankfully my headache is gone today but I have energy sensations around my head. It feels like gentle healing energy all around my head and face. Almost like someone is wrapping me in a pillow of energy. It is subtle and calming.

by

Redefining Reality

Like clockwork I am visited in the evenings before bed by my Companion. His presence and intent is made known via an intense pulling sensation in my third-eye. If I send out a mental query, I receive nothing in return. Yet if I direct my focus to my heart center, I received the communication. It is from this center that I receive his messages and accompanying comfort and calm.

I am unaccustomed to this new method of communication and struggle with it greatly. I want, no it seems I need, to translate the messages I receive into thoughts and words. Writing posts in this blog adds to this difficulty in translating what it is that I have received. In our original form we do not speak in words or even thoughts like what would be expected by us in the physical form. We speak in feelings which translate into a deep knowingness that is not limited to words/language.

My understanding is that I am to recover that which I have lost in the transfer into this human form. This includes, among many other abilities, the ability to know without the need to rationalize or analyze through the use of thoughts and language.

Yet at the same time I am still urged to share this process of transformation, of awaking to my True Self, with others. To do so means language must be used to translate all that is occurring. This is an intricate process because to use language incurs the use of the human mind and thus awakens the Ego to the process. It seems a catch-22 but I am assured it can be done.

Control of Thought

One lesson I am learning is how to control the random thoughts that are rising up out of my subconscious. They bombard me especially as I attempt to fall to sleep. Images such as a messy room strewn with torn paper and a pair of broken glasses and a counter top covered in spilled milk. The second these images appear there is an accompanying reaction of rejection and anxiety. It fills up my entire chest region and pulls me to wakefulness. I think of my youngest who has been into mischief these last few weeks – climbing up onto the kitchen counter or getting into things he should not. He has been known to toss dishes on the floor and break eye glasses (two pair now) among other things.

Image after image came into my mind last night and each time I awoke to a strong anxiety and upset. I pleaded to my Companion to help me. Why is this happening?

I was instructed to become the Observer and to note what was occurring each time one of these thoughts came into my mind. It did not take me long to recognize the pattern – visual appears followed by immediate rejection and welling up of anxiety.

It was then explained to me that these random images were the result of a purging of my third chakra and heart centers. There is a need to control my environment attached to a belief that if I can keep it under control then it cannot control me. The key to dissolving the images was to change my reaction to them. Acceptance is the key. Allow the experience to occur. Inspect the negative reaction. Allow it to teach me what it has to teach.

All experience has a lesson for us. To reject the experience is to reject the lesson. To reject the lesson means it will repeat until it is learned.

I appealed to my Companion, “But I react instantly and seem not to be able to control it”.

The response was that to control automatic reactions one must disengage and become the observer. And one must not be discouraged along the way for this is a habit that has been a lifetime in the making and will take time to reverse.

Discouraged, I felt suddenly very overwhelmed and wanted to quit.

I was then reminded that I must celebrate even the “smallest” of achievements.

Seeing Things as they Are

Still struggling to fall asleep, I was brought to awareness by a simple statement: “You will see things as they are rather than how you want them to be.”

I thought of it but could not stay focused and managed to fall asleep (finally!).

New Patterns in the Making

I overslept by 40 minutes this morning. My alarm did not go off and my husband and daughter forgot to wake me. As I rushed to get ready for work, my tired mind was interrupted periodically by the calming thoughts of my Companion. Each comment was in response to a thought of my own.

“I’m going to be late” was redirected with, “Let it go” and a feeling of calm and a knowing that it was not a big deal.

“I am going to miss my first appointment” was redirected with, “I can change my schedule”.

As I drove, I encountered a dreamy feeling and my vision was hazy. I briefly worried I would get into an accident and I was reminded that my thoughts create my reality and to control them. I no longer thought of “what-ifs” and drove faster than my normal cautious speed.

I arrived to work on time and noticed the sun in its brilliance as it rose. I heard my Companion say to me, “Celebrate! It’s a new day!” and I was filled with wonder and joy, as if this day was my first day of life.

And so far, it has been a good day.

by

Semi-Lucid Dream: Heart Expansion

I awoke around 5:30am and asked to astral project. I fell back to sleep quickly.

I gradually began to gain lucidity. I was in a shallow, rocky pool with others like myself. We were spread out and discussing the healing processes we had each been through. I felt comfortable but at the same time was not sure who these people were or where I was.

There was an older gentleman near me who I had been working closely with. He was very familiar to me. He had blonde hair, or maybe it was white, but had deep furrows in his brow and laugh lines around his eyes and mouth. I assumed him to be about 20 years older than me.

We were talking about the healing sessions but I can’t recall it in detail now. I felt drawn to the man and so moved in closer to him as we talked. There was a moment when I felt a decision was made to proceed to the next “step” in the process. I remember looking at the water and seeing that we were sitting inside a rocky, clear stream. The boulders were dark and smooth and the water shallow but deep enough to cover our legs as we sat in it. I fiddled with several red bricks that were at my feet and looked out of place. I said, “The bricks moved” as I tried to put them back in place.

The man said something to me and I turned and looked at him. His eyes were smiling even though he wasn’t. I made the “decision” then and fell into his arms. It seemed as if I melted into him and at that moment I didn’t care about my life or the consequences of this decision I made. All I knew is that I would give up everything I had to be right here, right now – forever.

As I held onto him I was approached by a little girl. She had dark, curly hair and was very timid-like. A woman was behind her and I felt she was her guide/caretaker. The little girl touched my knee and spoke to me.

“Quiero la verdad”, she said to me softly. But I heard her also say, “Tengo la verdad” at exactly the same time.

Confused, I caught only the word, “verdad” and knew immediately the translation.

“Truth”, I said aloud. “She said, ‘Truth'”.

I then looked behind her at the woman guardian and felt we needed to invite the little girl to/into us.

Heart Connection

The sensation of the connection I had just made woke me up and I lay there in total bliss as the energy of my heart chakra expanded. I felt the presence of my Companion close and knew something was up, but didn’t care. This indescribable feeling was all I cared about. I also knew the little girl who spoke Spanish was me and that she brought with her “truth”.

I tried to figure out what the feeling I felt was. I had been, still was, willing to give up everything for the feeling. It was similar to intense sexual attraction without the sexual part. It was like I had found my other half and there was no way I was about to let it go. (As I type this my heart is expanding again and the feeling makes me want to cry with joy)

My Companion said to me, “We are One”, and as I worried the feeling would leave he said, “It is always there. It will always be there”.

The feeling intensified and I caught myself holding my breath.

“It is beautiful”, I said to him. And it was/IS.

I recognized then that some of my other chakras were sporadically pulling and filling with the blissful energy as well. I felt my second chakra and my third eye the most intensely, but my root chakra also pulled. As I focused on them, I heard my Companion comment on the thoughts I had. My second chakra is nearly cleared and soon there will be a full alignment and the energy will pour in from the top and the bottom. I could only imagine how that would feel. His comment to that was, “Soon”.

I didn’t wan to move or leave. I said to him, “I don’t want this to stop – ever”.

I was instructed to relax and let go, so I did. An image then came to me of a shelf with hay, similar to the nesting boxes of chickens. I saw myself selecting eggs, but these were no ordinary eggs. They were huge, like ostrich eggs, and each was a vibrant color. I saw blue first and reached for it and held it in my hands. It was larger than my hand! I then became fully lucid and said, “They are the chakras!” as I saw a yellow one, an orange one, and a purple one. I looked for the red one and when I saw it the image vanished and I saw myself surrounded by a circle which was clear on the inside but outlined in solid red.

I woke up fully then, still feeling the amazing sensation expanding from my heart center. I rolled over and our conversation continued, but I don’t recall it all now. I was instructed to lay on my back, so I did. I also recall being told to not resume smoking (I quit my one-cigarette a night a week ago today).

The next part will be in my next entry for this one is too long already.