Category Archives: soul braid

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Dream Message: Walk-In

Went to bed asking for clarity regarding the feeling I’ve been having. 

Dreamed I was back in a school (learning) gym (discipline, strength, health) from my elementary years and my high school gradation ceremony was on the stage located in that gym. It was renovated at some point when I was in high school and the gym in the dream had not been renovated. I was walking around inside the gym with an ex-coworker of mine who I’ve had K dreams with in the past. We were talking and walking, noticing the condition of the space. I told him I recently discovered I owned the gym and relayed how I didn’t remember buying it.

The gym looked a lot like it did when I was in elementary school except more in decay (neglecting learning, health). The ceilings were super high and I remember looking up at them and then looking down at the floor which had been a nice, bright pine wood and now was graying. My friend and I walked to the back where it looked like an old cafe use to be. I actually remembered the cafe in the dream and asked about it. A woman who seemed to appear out of nowhere said it had been closed down years ago. I thought of using the bathroom (cleansing) and she told me, “Do go in the bathroom or you might fall through the floor”. She said an older gentleman had destroyed some of the tile allowing water to get into the subfloor. I mentioned to my friend how I would like to start up the cafe again. He said I could do anything I wanted and the woman said I would need a permit. The idea felt like a good one until I began to think of all the work it might take.

My friend and I sat on the floor at a round (continuum, connection) sofa table as I told him about the unsettled feeling I had been having. In the dream it felt like a demonic presence was following me. I had a bag full of tarot cards with me. I opened it and let them fall on the table. It was clear there were several decks mixed up inside. I asked my friend to help me sort them and apologized in advance for taking up his time because he seemed not to want to help. He did help, though, and began to go through the cards. Several piles began to form and I recognized some of the decks. At one point he pulled one card out and paused. I thought he was pulling the card for the other lady with us (couldn’t make her out but she seemed older) but he asked me to “read” the card. I misunderstood and read the word on the card aloud but the language it was in was unfamiliar and foreign. He said, “What does the picture tell you?” I focused in on the picture and saw it was of a person laying down and overtop of them, almost exactly superimposed except for a few inches, was another spirit-like person. I said, “It looks like the card is saying Spirit is leaving the body….or maybe it is coming into the body. [long pause] It’s a walk-in.” I Knew in the dream that the card was indicating a walk-in situation. 

My friend left the card alone in the middle of the table and I said, “It doesn’t belong to a deck.” 

The rest of the dream was me seeming to fly through the gym and then up and out of it but I could see through the walls.  I could see the entire layout. I began to image the changes I would make to it. I remember considering putting the kitchen in the front of the gym space and then told my friend I would wall off the high ceiling at around ceiling height and just leave the space at the top as is and might later put on a second floor. I also considered making it into a movie theater. 

Then my friend had to leave and I felt sad. I didn’t want him to go and asked him to stay. I got very close, so close our cheeks touched but he turned away. I told him I understood if he needed more time and he got up and began to leave.

The dream scene shifts and I am in a desert-like environment high up on some cliffs. I am walking with others. We are all dressed in long, light gray robes. I remember I had on a long, golden necklace with a cross pendant. I saw this because I was seeing myself from outside myself (memory perhaps of other times). I grabbed it and touched the cross. My friend was also there but he was ahead of the group. The sense I had was we were gathering and it had to do with something holy or divine. 

Then I was walking barefoot (seeking authenticity) through batting cages (protection). I recall how the concrete felt on my bare feet. I passed along the fence towards the exit. Others were there staring at me like I was out of place. I walked out and down a path to a parking lot. I was searching for my car (life path) but couldn’t remember what car I drove (uncertainty of life path) nor could I recall driving and parking it there. I eventually turned back around, realizing I wasn’t leaving and would have to stay the night.

I went back to the gym and many people were there including my friend. I sat down next to him with a salad (balance and nourishment) to eat. He had macaroni and cheese (need to finish tasks). I remember looking over at him and our eyes locking. The feeling was neutral. 

Eventually I walked over to a very high shelving system. It was full of produce. Some was so high I couldn’t figure out how anyone could get to it. The space felt to have partially been transformed into a grocery store (choices and needs for growth). 

Reflection

The dream seems to indicate I am returning to unfinished business. I am told more than once I can do whatever I want with the space which means I have freewill/choice. I spend some time imagining what I want and enjoy this part of the dream the most. The tarot card for me was a direct answer to a question. It was reminding me I am a Walk-in. This was accepted in the dream and I didn’t linger on it. The part where I was wearing a robe seems to have been a memory of some other time. I don’t know what to make of it. The part where I am barefoot was very memorable because of feeing the concrete cold beneath my feet and the odd environment of the batting cages. The lost car isn’t surprising. I feel a bit lost and uncertain of my path. 

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Connecting the Dots

After writing my last post I realized that I did not explain something very key to this process I am going through. In reading my post I saw how similar it is to someone who is about to commit suicide. I assure this is not what is happening, even though it seems similar. I am fine. In comparison to other points in my life which were like mountains in their enormity, this is a hill.

This is not the first time I have been at this point in my life. I went through a similar process during my Dark Night. All of the memories coming up for review are ones I have already confronted and handled. I made my peace with my past a long time ago. That doesn’t mean it still doesn’t hurt when I look at it. Right now I am letting go of the residual attachment and emotion I have to these incidents in my life. It is a relief to release them. The more honest I am about my past, the better.

Right now I am uncertain what is at the end of this road. Although I am being told this is a walk-in/walk-out, the idea is still very alien to me in many ways. Remember, the walk-in has been with me throughout this life as my Companion. He came into this life with me. To me, he IS me. We are not separate and he has always been there. I trust him wholeheartedly.

Part of me thinks that this process is merely the obliteration of the Ego, the crumbling of the illusions I have built my life around. Whether this is the case or not will be known soon enough. I will say that I woke with a strong desire to write a farewell letter to my family and also a letter to the Walk-in. Why do I feel this need? It makes no sense yet at a subconscious level I am accepting that a big change is about to take place and in not knowing what I will be like when it is said and done I feel I need to prepare. Weird, but apparently this is not uncommon among walk-outs. No, I haven’t written the letters yet, but I am certain it will come in the not too distant future.

Connecting the Dots

After I wrote my last post I had a near panic attack and asked for the walk-in to take over. Within minutes I was listening to music, cleaning house and feeling clear headed. No anxiety feeling. Information that was not previously available came pouring in and the dots began to connect.

After my awakening in 2003 I was heading down this same path. I entered into the Dark Night almost immediately after and was reviewing my life constantly whether I wanted to or not. I made huge leaps and gains and was at the point where the merge with my Companion could be initiated. That is when I changed my mind. I had freed myself enough that I felt I could handle more of life and allow myself to be loved. At the time I was thrown into confusion because I had felt my life was “over”. It is a hard feeling to explain but it feels like life is complete; all planned lessons learned. Once I accepted the new timeline it got easier. I didn’t have much time to get in all that I wanted, so things moved very, very fast. And then the familiar feeling of being done came back. It is an unmistakable feeling. When asked what I wanted, I never had an answer. The only answer I would give was, “Nothing, I feel done.”

I’ve had questions from the beginning about my Companion. I am told he is a part of me, like my other half but then I am told I have other, other halves. How is this even possible? The Union dream I had really threw me into confusion-land because I met one of my counterparts yet he didn’t look/feel like my Companion. WTF?

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The best explanation I have gotten thus far is that we started as One, then split into Two and then the Two each split again. This happens exponentially as each of us matures. So all this Twin Flame nonsense is wildly distorted. Technically, we can have a never-ending amount of Twin Flames if you consider just how frequently we “split”. What I was shown is that my most intense connections are now Four. This only means that the point of experience for me is now located within the first couple of divisions. Meeting any of the other three would create one hell of an intense connection. I experienced one and I will tell you that it should be illegal. Do not try this at home. Adult Spiritual supervision required. LOL

The spider web analogy works well here. At the center are the main supports and all others branch off from them getting ever wider and adding more and more branches. We can choose our experiences to be at any point on the web. We are all of them, all the time.

Yeah, no wonder I was confused! Add to that the experience of the Union (or whatever it was) and it is no surprise that I want to walk-out.

 

 

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Becoming Whole

At around 5pm CST I received the first of several blasts of energy to my heart center. They did not last long, the longest lasting maybe a few minutes.

All this happened when I was watching T.V. and alone. I had the house to myself and was enjoying just being. This is when my attention was suddenly diverted from the T.V. to my left. I swear I felt/heard/sensed someone trying to get my attention. Then came the heart blast. I smiled from ear to ear.

During maybe the third or fourth heart blast I heard very loudly, “Did you miss me?” This shocked me for it seemed to come from within and without at the same time. Usually I can determine a direction and locate where the message is coming from, but this one seemed to originate from within me, from within my very center. Woah.

This startled me to the point that I began to panic a bit. I was reminded to stay out of my mind and when I did that and focused back on my heart the energy there increased and I calmed substantially.

I recognized the voice and the feeling behind it as that of my Companion. So quiet these last few weeks it was/is nice to have communication from him again.

Every once in a while I will convince myself that I am insane and that this entire experience I am having is some kind of psychotic break with reality. This rarely lasts long as I am instantly reminded of the very real experiences I have had and the amazing feeling of love that accompanies them. It is like I am being presented with the decision – to Believe or not to Believe – over and over again. This is what happened last night as I sat alone, overwhelmed once again with what was happening to me. In that moment I was reminded that I created this experience – it is purposeful. I am on a journey of reUnification; a journey to wholeness. And I heard, “We can do this, for We already are.”

We Can Be All Places, All Times

As I continued to try and watch T.V. my attention continued to be diverted to other things. My mind would blank out and I would feel I was receiving communication but there were no words, no images of this communication. I was just a receiving. Then there came an idea that I could choose to be in more than once place at once – that this was my true nature. I Remembered briefly how to do this, how to be in multiple places at once. I do this when I view the future for myself or another. I have done it before, but a limited version of it, one my human mind can accept for to view too many timelines at once can overwhelm the mind and create a break with reality.

I attempted to see the future, or at least one of them, and felt myself to be observing myself and moving through time to a point in the not so distant future. I saw my family arriving and me helping with the baby. Then I shifted to look at present time reality. Where was my family at this moment? I saw them settling into the car and knew they were about 20 minutes away. I saw the inside of the car with clarity and saw my middle son drifting off to sleep.

This is remote viewing and I have done it before. I rarely do it because I have a lack of belief in it caused by not bringing back information that can be proved. I do it sometimes on accident, though, and to my surprise it has been proven. Still I don’t do it often for lack of belief.

I discovered the clarity of my perceptions in remote viewing is increased when I have a psychic bond with the individual(s) I am viewing. This can be done if I have a link to an object or place as well. However, I find it fascinating that I can view the happenings of someone I have never met from a far distance just because there is a strong link between us. It is beautiful but at the same time I feel wrong to do it. I feel I am invading their privacy. Yet I know they also can see/perceive me. For this particular person it happens quite by accident, without any intention on my part. Why? I have no idea but it is so astonishingly clear and makes me smile every time. In my life I have never experienced such a link to anyone, not even my own child.

Becoming Whole

After about an hour or so of on and off heart blasts, I got out the wine. This stopped the heart energy but my third-eye flickered on and off and my Companion did not leave. I could still feel him and still feel he wanted me to focus on the remote viewing “lesson”. Sigh.

I fell asleep quickly and slept deeply (thank you wine!) but awoke at around 5:30am with my Companion very present. I recalled my dreams and remembered what had been occurring through the night. We were together discussing my inability to accept my “other half”. I was reminded that this body is but a shell that I occupy for a short time. In reality I am neither male or female. The dream, which involved a discussion about a man who was undergoing a sex change/gender reassignment was vivid in my mind. How could a man be a woman, too? Yet, that is what we are. We are both. Even in understanding this, my human mind struggled to understand it. How can I be both?

I had flashes of my Companion in his non-human form. In this form he had no gender. He reminded me that We can take on any form we choose. He reminded me again the he is me and I am him. This is so hard for me to digest because I am talking to him, which means then that I am talking to myself. Talk about making a person feel insane.

I am reminded that we are in stasis – We I mean. That We are a Pleiadian Starseed, from the planet Lyra. That We are currently experiencing on Earth to help but also to grow, and that we have been doing this for many hundreds of Earth years. We split in two to do this. He lived and I observed and then vice versa. There is something very special about this lifetime for Us. We will both be in this body. I don’t understand it fully. It is a bit overwhelming and I find myself back at the point where I want him to go away. Of course, he never goes away.

I also know we are now writing Chapter 3.

 

 

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Allowing the Exchange

Something shifted for me yesterday and is still in process. It is subtle. Had I not taken the time to meditate and tune in, I likely would not have noticed it at all.

Most of the day yesterday I felt “off”. There was a feeling I couldn’t quite figure out and my mind was not up to par. I keep forgetting things. Small things mostly, but then I forgot my daughter had early out and so missed picking her up at the bus stop! This is so not like me. I am usually on top of everything but my mind is just not cooperating. Really, this mental fog has been going on for some time but now I seem to not care if I forget. I figure if it is important enough I will remember. Otherwise, it must be inconsequential. And really, missing the bus was no big deal. I just jumped in the car and picked her up at school and then all three kids got to play at the school playground. It all works out in the end. Why bother worrying?

Allowing the Exchange

Around 3pm I took a few moments to lay down and tune in. My heart chakra instantly began to pull all the way through to my back. Momentarily I was pleased but then when I got up the heart intensity ceased. However, as soon as I tuned in it would reappear.

When I did my evening meditation my heart lit up again but only slightly. My mind has been somewhat in overdrive from focusing on 3D stuff so it took extra effort on my part to shut it down. As soon as I did one of my guides asked, “What can we do to help you?” This threw me completely. I don’t think I have ever been asked that question. I had no idea how to answer!

Then I was asked, “What do you feel?” Instead of focusing on my emotions like I normally do, for some reason I began to focus on the sensations in my body. I noticed immediately a strange sensation within my brain. It is hard to describe but it felt like I was not alone in there – like someone else was present. There was a strange pressure from within that I had not notice before.

Again I don’t know why but I knew this other presence was part of me, had been part of me, for some time. I will use the word braid in since I have no other way to describe the relationship I have with this other aspect. She/he’s been with me for some time but the upgrades and adjustments to my brain have only recently progressed enough to allow a further integration. This is the only way I know the describe it. I feel completely loonie just considering it, but then again I don’t.

I felt an urge to withdraw and allow this other aspect to come forward. It is hard to describe how I did this but I was able to. That was when it got strange. I became a witness to this other me conversing with my guide. The other me answered the question I had just been asked – “What can we do for you?” He (but really there is no gender associated) said something about making adjustments to this life slowly so as to not cause panic. I was referred to as something else but I can’t recall the term used to describe me. It was something like controlling entity or something like that.

There was so much more conveyed without words. It was like a knowingness from this other aspect seeped into my consciousness. As it did I became completely compliant and relieved.  I was thinking, “Finally something is happening!” I wanted desperately for it to happen all at once. “It” being the exchange. My guide reminded me it must occur gradually and I asked him if he had ever done it before and he said, “No, but I have witnessed many.”

Memories

I had memories resurface from my life. All at once. It was like a floodgate opened but they came in one at a time. I remembered a time probably around 2000 when I was living in Alaska. I had prayed and prayed for God to take away my fear. I was terrified to make a move I knew I needed to make. In fact, I remember I seemed to be afraid of everything. I realized that now I am rarely afraid. I still have fear, but compared to back then I appear almost fearless. Wow.

I remembered that prior to that I had been writing a novel. It is long gone now probably as I left it when I left my ex-husband. However, the book was almost halfway complete. It was about a woman who had paranormal experiences. She was married with children and had just moved into her new home. Then Spirit began to visit her – first in her dreams then in her waking life. She also had encounters with E.T.s. The last chapter I wrote about was her being “called” into the mountains where she was met by a very large UFO. I wrote this in 1998-99 five years before my awakening. I still remember the book as vivid pictures in my mind. It was so very real to me at the time. Looking back on it now I wonder if I had been perceiving something of my own future and just didn’t realize that is what it was.

After allowing my braided-in aspect to come forward and the memory floodgates opened I continued to feel strange. I fell asleep and awoke at 4am feeling an intense need to get a job. I am really, really not liking the idea but this feeling is so intensely strong that I don’t know if I can resist it.

 

 

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Walk Along

Yesterday my crying episodes and intense grief lifted and turned into a wonderful, happy high. I spent the evening with family and had a good time. I felt normal again. Sigh of relief.

I had an interesting experience in the middle of the night. When I woke at 3am my heart chakra was wide open, exploding with a beautiful love energy but there was still a pulling sensation that would sometimes feel a bit uncomfortable. I was also being washed in energy hugs from my Companion. I wondered, “What’s going on?”

Dreams

It was then that I remembered my dream. In it, I had been having a discussion with a woman who resembled me but was very frantic and frazzled in her appearance. She had a familiar energy, though, like family. I don’t remember much of the interaction except that the woman was killed by a horse who kicked her in the head. I remember being invited to continue her work. I was not alone. My Companion was there with me.

Then I was a baby. A little, tiny baby swaddled up and just laying there helplessly. Innocent, pure – without memory or experience. The image of this baby and the feeling was very vivid.

Connection

The dream itself sparked a memory but this memory came from my heart and I can’t really put it into words. I knew that this was a recollection of the walk-in experience, though I really didn’t want to talk about it as it still feels odd to me to even use that word. Yet my heart flooded with such energy confirmation that I could not avoid being overcome by the love energy. I felt like I would just melt into my bed.

The energy in my heart just continued to expand and I associated it with my Companion. I knew this love energy in my heart was Us but I didn’t understand it and why it was happening.

The heart surge has a way of pulling me into the in-between when I let myself fall into it. This is what must have happened because the next thing I knew I was talking with my Companion. He asked me, “Will you marry me?” This made me laugh and brought me out of the in-between, back to the intensely expansive heart explosion.

Of course I said, “Yes”. It felt appropriate and also like there was some kind of agreement connected to it. Like a pre-arrangement for our combined evolution.

He said to me then, “We will grow together” and I again saw the little baby in my mind’s eye. It felt like we had been reborn together. There was a feeling of newness and curiosity.

It was explained to me then that we are ascending together, he and I, and that this is part of the process. He keeps telling me the intense purging, crying, and emotional rawness is all part of this process. It is letting go of the old soul – the walk-out. Releasing her. There was also a feeling of this being a process involving the spiritual “bodies” – moving through them, clearing and aligning them. Embodiment also kept coming up. I could see layers that were these “bodies” for lack of a better word. I don’t fully understand it but my heart tells me it is a normal part of the process, whatever the “process” is.

Walk Along

Finally, he referred to a group of three light beings hovering near the far left of my vision. They were far back so I only noticed them when he referred to them. He then said, “Walk along” and I knew he was asking if these Beings had permission to walk along with me/Us through this experience. I didn’t know what to say. So I asked if it meant they would just observe and felt this was right but that they would also contribute. They would contribute part of themselves to assist me. Like give me some of their energy but this doesn’t accurately describe it. I agreed. Why not? I can use as much assistance as I can get!

I felt curious about this “walk along” idea. I vaguely recall reading about it in Walk-Ins Among Us by Yvonne Perry. I visited her website and read this:

A walk-in can also be a companion soul in spirit form walking along with an embodied soul. A walk-in can be a fragmented aspect of a soul coming home and reuniting with the soul essence in a body. It can be a blend of soul essences in which two or more souls inhabit a body simultaneously. These may rotate in and out of the “driver’s seat” as needed to accomplish a task.

I find it interesting that she refers to the walk-in as a companion soul walking along with an embodied soul. This feels like my experience 100%. I feel the term “companion” is especially relevant. That is how Steven refers to himself – as my Companion Traveler.

I suspect that now that I have agreed to allow these light beings to walk along with me, that I will notice when they are present. But I don’t know. I guess I will see? 🙂

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Walk-In Acceptance

This morning I awoke suddenly to an intense pulling in my heart chakra. This is not new to me anymore. Seems my heart is always doing something these days. Yet this morning there was a serious feeling coming from my Team that demanded my attention. I knew instantly what was going on. I said to my Team, “I’m a walk-in.”

There’s that word again! I have not been bringing it up as much as it is coming up. I think I am just in denial of all of it. It is such a bizarre idea in and of itself and I struggle to make sense of it and how it could possibly be something I am.

Well this morning I guess my Team has had it with me and my denial and they just outright told me, “Yes, you are a walk-in.” With that I knew when it occurred – 2014 – and all the puzzle pieces began fit neatly together.

Talk

I knew I had to talk to my husband. So, I did. I explained everything to him to the best of my ability. I explained how I have been feeling, how I have changed in the last year or so. I explained what a walk-in is and that I believe I am one. I explained what it meant and what I knew was coming.

Specifically, I told him that I had been sad last night after I connected with him at the heart level. I am sad because I know I am being asked to leave. Soon. I told him it is not now. I don’t know when it will be. But I know it is coming. I am being prepared for it and so I am also preparing him and our children for it. I don’t want them to be shocked when the time comes.

Surprisingly, he reacted calmly and with admiration. He said, “You have such great confront! Most people would be squirming away from even looking.” True. Yet I don’t think he really understands.

Your-Higher-SelfThe Specifics

From what I understand (still Remembering), the walk-in began gradually. The walk-out had to prepare and was very reluctant to leave. The walk-out/walk-in should have happened years ago but the original soul kept changing her mind. Ambivalent. She was so excited about the changes leading up to her departure that she kept staying. The changes were the spiritual awakening and everything else she was experiencing. Who wouldn’t change their mind and want to stay?

It was decided that after her last child was born that she would leave. The preparations would begin during the pregnancy and continue until the exchange was complete. And so it began almost immediately, but it was slow and gradual.

When explaining it to my husband, I realized just exactly how it happened and why I didn’t really notice the changes. The walk-out has to relinquish control of the body. This is a gradual process for the two (body and soul) are firmly connected. The walk-in was present the entire time and the merging process was finally initiated. This is why there was a braid-in. Both had to be present in the body and then control of the body could be transferred. This is less traumatic and easier for the walk-out and also gives the walk-in time to adjust and observe.

The original soul is still present. I think she will be for a while. She does not want to let go and wants to see this through to a positive end. Agreements were made and contracts written that must be followed through to completion.

I knew this morning that ultimately my job will be to prepare my family for my departure. They are not part of my mission here. They were part of hers. Though I carry a deep love for them all, I do not have the attachment to them that she does. When I first recognized this detached feeling I retracted in horror from it because it was not something she would have felt; it was completely out of sync with the memories I carried of her life.

Like I told my husband, I don’t know when I will be called to leave. It will come, though. I have no doubt of it now. I explained what the call feels like to my husband and how it has manifested previously. A massive amount of energy descends from above and I feel HUGE and full of clarity and knowingness. I just know what to do and I do not hesitate to do it. This happened when I agreed to sell our old home and move away from my family. I knew a contract with my mom had come to a conclusion and I was free to leave. There was massive amounts of relief along with sadness. The conflicting emotions didn’t make sense to me then but now they do. The old me, still very present, was grieving, the new me was excited to move on.

Preparation 

The body has to be prepared for the walk-in soul. The vibration of the walk-in is much higher and could result in major physical difficulties or even death (at the extreme). My experiences in 2014 up until just recently are evidence of the necessary upgrades.

Simultaneously, I was traveling in my sleep and meeting up with my soul family. These kinds of connections are evident in my journal entries as well. That is why I was asked to review them.

It all makes a so much more sense to me now looking back on it all. I was told numerous times of the upcoming exchange, I just didn’t understand what it really meant and I thought the end result would be different – that I would be somehow changed overnight and be someone else. It is not like that at all. I retain everything from the walk-out – the memories, the experiences, the feelings. I am still her on so many levels but at the same time I’m not. The exchange will not be 100% complete until I have fulfilled all her soul contracts and agreements. Until then, I am bound by them as she was. Once I finish what she started I will be free to join up with my family (soul group) who is waiting for me. I feel the pull from my soul family intensly. It doesn’t ever go away. I miss them.

What is the most difficult for me right now is the reconciliation of what was and what will be. My Team, so very serious this morning, left me with a message. They kept repeating, “Remember you are loved. We love you.” This was said multiple times. As I continue to process everything I am Remembering, I understand why they would say this. What lies ahead will not be easy and I will need to remember I am loved.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Walk-In, Settling-In

The more I live this life the more I think that I put in all kinds of twists and turns to keep myself on my toes. It just keeps getting curiouser and curiouser.

I was in the shower when it happened. Suddenly, I felt completely disconnected from this life and who I am….or….er was. When I tried to contact her/myself it was strange. I honestly can’t find the words for the feeling.

I had flashes of my life come into my mind. My past and present all at once combined together. Usually emotionally charged memories were just dead, like a movie film of someone else’s life. There were memories of specific people like my Mom and sisters, my childhood friends, and pets I loved and lost. All incidents which I held onto for whatever reason be it anger, hurt, sadness, joy. When I saw these memories I knew those experiences had “served their purpose”. I was “done” and they weren’t needed anymore.

Huh?

I freaked a bit, but not too much because I instantly recognized where this amnesia-like feeling came from. My Companion and his settling in. He told me it would be “different”. Ha! This is freakin’ WEIRD!

I remembered the blender I saw in a vision. Funny but not funny. I feel a bit violated. This is MY life dammit! Stop taking it away! – Yet I know it is not going anywhere, hasn’t gone anywhere. But I am so utterly different than I was. So totally different than I was even yesterday.

It is hard to explain. I wish I could articulate it, but I don’t think a feeling like this has a word in this or any other language.

I sense a change in my energy. It is specifically on the entire left side of my body; the left side of my brain. My head hurts on and off. My neck, too. My focus shifts in and out.

My heart chakra hurts one minute and is exploding in love the next. Then I want to laugh and giggle and let it take over. Woosh!

I keep expecting the lost emotion from those memories that flooded my mind to come back. But when I inspect them, they are the same. They are there. I can remember everything about them, but I am different. It is like I am turning my back on them and walking away. I am saying goodbye to my life and everything that went with it.

I will say my children have not been in those memories. Neither has my current husband. The memories in question are of my Mom, Dad, sisters, old friends, ex husband, college, high school, etc. They go back to the beginning of this life. That me is fading quickly. She was already alien to me in many ways but now it is like she is just gone. And what is even better is that it feels like the karma is gone with her. Maybe this blending thing isn’t so bad….

As I type this I am being asked to let go, to step aside, to make room for this other me. But I see the division clearly, it is like a door has opened and I am being asked to walk through it. When I do, I leave this behind, these memories, this entire story that is my life.

And the glimpses I am getting of what it will be like without the heaviness of my past (I didn’t realize it was heavy until now) I am not near as afraid I was.

I can’t help but think that I will wake up in the next week or so and not be me anymore. Not this me anyway. Parts of me will be there, I think that is necessary, but a new part will be in charge. How can this be? How can such a thing happen? Honestly, I don’t know. And I don’t even know if I will know when it occurs being it has gotten this far and I am just now noticing. Weird. Weird. Weird.

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Dream: Light Language Transmission

I finally slept pretty soundly last night. I had many, many dreams containing more information than my conscious mind was able to retain. Thankfully, I did retain some and my Companion helped me access it.

Dream: Light Language Transmission

This dream was long, so I will condense it.

I was visiting with a group of people living in a commune-type setting. It was families sharing everything and they were very tight knit. I was learning of their daily routine and my husband and I were considering joining them.

At one point they were telling me how they lost a member of their group. I felt very sad for them and told them I would help. I got down on my knees in this golden space (alter maybe?) and looked up at the sun which was at about 10 o’clock in the sky. I began to sing a lovely song that was very alien in its sound. It was nothing like I had ever sung and the melody was strange yet beautiful. As I sang the song which consisted of words and syllables I was unfamiliar with, I saw a golden light come out of me and connect with the sun in the sky. Within the light were symbols streaming out of me and up. They were golden also and shimmered in the light.

I had such a peaceful feeling while singing but something about my song connected me to these people I was with and I felt an overwhelming love and sympathy for the loss of their loved one. All I wanted to do was help them.

My husband did not want to stay with these people so we chose to leave, which saddened me for they felt like family to me now. As I said my goodbyes, three women dressed in simple dress, stood in a line to see me off. I went to each of them and gave them a hug and a kiss. I felt myself crying as I did.

Message

When I awoke I immediately recognized the song as light language and was surprised that it had come out of me. I also knew I had sent it, or transmitted it, to an individual far, far away as a means to “bring them back” from being lost from their family. I don’t remember what I sang but I finally understood what light language is. It is a connection established between one (or many) consciousness and another. It is purely telepathic so no words could ever actually translate, only an emotion or an overall sense of the message.

Space Craft and Being

I fell back into the in-between thinking of this and saw suddenly that I was hovering inside some sort of space craft and I was not alone. The craft was a circular, domed disc. It was vast, spreading out around me and covered with symbols similar to what I had just seen in my dream. I was hovering over a window that looked down onto a galaxy far below. It looked like a partial swirl of stars and dust. I knew instantly that I was in space on board a ship and that I had been there before.

With me was my Companion. He asked me to look down at the swirling mass of stars below me. He said, “That is You”. A tiny star stood out more brightly than the rest. I understood this to mean this star was Earth.

We conversed for quiet sometime. Him telling me that They wanted me to Remember and that this was a test to see how much I could handle. I could see him, or parts of him, and knew he was not human in appearance. He was much, much taller than I and very pale, with long, spindly arms and legs and a bulbous mid-section which was hard for me to make out. His head was elongated without any visible hair and his facial features were very small in comparison. He had massive eyes that took up the majority of his facial area. They were dark blue (like the eyes of a newborn baby) and slanted upward toward his temples. I do not recall seeing any whites, only the bluish color. His nose was very small and petite, but it was there, and his mouth was similar in size to his nose with no discernible lips.I did not see any ears. It was hard to tell what color he was in the light (it was dark) but he appeared light in complexion, so I suspect he was either light gray or blue in color.

I contracted from this image at first but felt no fear so stopped and took a closer look.

The most vivid aspect of him were his hands. They were very thin, with long fingers that had overly large pads on them. It was almost like he had frog fingers. I asked about them and he said, “Our senses are not like yours. We have a supremely developed sense of touch”. I saw that he used touch to control the ship and saw an electric blue energy that ran through the ship in what appeared to be “veins”. I knew then that the ship had consciousness and that he was tapped into or a part of that consciousness.

I asked many questions as I hovered there over the window overlooking our solar system. He told me that They stayed far from the Earth so as to not be detected. The ship was indeed “alive” and the symbols inscribed all over it were the same symbols that I saw in my dream. The ship itself communicated with those on Earth who were receptive to it. Similarly, those on board the ship (connected with the ship) also communicated with those on Earth who were receptive. It was like a mass consciousness circuit between the ship, those on the ship and those on Earth. I was and am still in awe! So this is what Light Language is! It is US communicating with Them and their ships!

I asked about his body and where he was. He told me that his body is not like ours. He said it is composed of energy but would feel solid to the touch. This is/was hard for me to understand. Eventually, after several questions and answers, I concluded that he is either a 4D or 5D Being.

What was the most concerning to me was that this Being was in fact my Companion. I have no doubt of this. He explained that his consciousness and mine had been interlinked but that he continues his commitments/activities in this craft as well as other areas all at the same time. He can do this easily and without much concentration. This is very amazing to me.

I once again saw the 3D plane set out in front of me. It again had objects and markers on it. He said to me, “We need you to Remember your mission now”. I did not and do not remember it despite being in awe of this experience. I was told more was to come which indicates to me that my reaction was appropriate.

There is so much more I was told, but I am still digesting it all. I will share it as I feel comfortable.

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Dialogue with my Companion

One of those wiped memories that suddenly returned was a conversation I had with my Companion yesterday. I wanted to share it with you all since I am confused still by it.

I asked him about Us. Who are We? Is everyone like Us? Does everyone have a Companion Traveler? Is a Companion Traveler different from a Spirit guide?

His answers were this:

Who are We?

We are two of the same individual (individual is not the right word here but is good enough). Halves of a whole. I am You and You are Me. You are the Earth Traveler and I am your Companion Traveler.

Does everyone who comes to Earth have a set up like us – Companion Traveler and Earth Traveler?

No. We are chosen to do a specific task while here and have traveled this path before. We travel always together.

Is a Companion Traveler different from a Spirit Guide?

Based upon the definition you have of spirit guide, no, but your definition is the one We provided Us previously. In terms of what most people consider a spirit guide, I am not that. You have those, though. We call them Assistants.

Are you my Higher Self?

This terminology can be very confusing in that it implies that We have a Higher and Lower Self; that We are one more important than the other. So, no, I am not your “Higher” Self, I am simply You.

Yes, You are the Me that Remembers, correct?

Correct. I am here to give you access to certain knowledge at certain points in Our journey. Through you I see and experience the physical, which you call 3D. This is your application at this time. You were created by Us for this purpose – to be the Experiencer.

So not everyone has a Companion Traveler, then?

No. Only those who have come for the purpose of restoring Hue-manity.

Is a Companion Traveler limited to those who are soul braided?

No.  A soul braid is just one way it is done. In this case, We have chosen this particular method in order to strengthen our connection and communication during Our time here. Without such a connection it is likely that You/We would fail to complete our mission.

You say we “travel always together”, what do you mean by that?

We have been together from the beginning. It cannot be explained in a way that your human mind would comprehend. I will explain it as best I can. Imagine a piece of fruit. You cut it in half. You still have the fruit, but it now in two pieces. This is Us. We are separate for a time. We do this purposefully in order to experience. When You return from this life We will once again be whole but remain separate until We have finished what we started.

So when I die I will return to You and We will be whole again?

Yes, but we will again separate to experience again.

Will you be the Experiencer this time?

No. I am sorry. This is your application.

The way you are describing our relationship sure does sound like what I have read of the Higher Self.

It is similar but not correct.

Are you then perhaps my future?

This would be a more appropriate description, yes, except that Time is part of the illusion from which your experience stems. 

I am confused about my memory of being in stasis and of my Starseed origins. Can you explain this to me so that I understand?

What you recall of your origins is in fact accurate. This is where We reside, though it is not confined to Time or space.

So you are in another dimension yet you are braided with me?

Yes, this would be accurate.

Is this other dimension consider the Other Side? Is this where people go when they die?

No. This would not be accurate. The place people go when they die is located around the Earth in layers. This you know as the astral realms. They extend for many layers.

Yet the image you show me in my mind shows me going through these layers and beyond.

This is accurate.

I am confused by this.

You must travel through the varying levels. It is similar to your scuba diving experience. You cannot come to the surface from deep below without first decompressing at the lower levels. To do so would mean damaging your human lungs. It is similar for us when we leave a human body. You must “decompress” in order to return to your original vibration.

Okay. This makes sense to me. Why then don’t others also go where I will be going?

Some will. Those whose vibrations lead them…… higher will go higher (resistance to using word “higher” here).

The resistance is that We do not want anyone to misjudge what We intend to relay because the word “higher” once again implies that there are lower, thus, lesser levels. These levels are not “less”, they merely are. When a body is dropped, the individual will then go to where their previous (before Earth) vibration was. 

So when I go to You and We are once again whole, is this what I perceive as Home?

Yes, but what you perceive is but a sliver of what is available to you.

Like always, I am left with many more questions than I had to begin with. This is why I often do not ask many questions of my Companion.

 

 

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The Antecedent

I have been holding back writing about something that has been going on because I was still trying to figure out what it was and if it was anything of note. I believe I now have a good understanding of what it is.

Antecedent

For the past several nights I have been seeing colors behind my closed eyes. These are not just blank patches of colors. No. These are colorful objects. I have no idea what I am seeing, though.

The color I first saw was a vivid purple. It was in the shape of two circles, one on top of the other, but there were swirls of different hues of purple inside the circles and I swear I also saw triangles inside.

The next color was blue. A vivid blue. A blue that completely saturated my visual field.

The next color was orange. This time the image was obvious. It was of oranges, a huge pile of them.

Then I saw a vivid red. There was a circular shape with this color, too.

I have a slight memory  of seeing yellow and green as well, but not as vividly nor as long.

These colors came and went in the previous nights always in the same order. Last night I finally asked what was going on.

I saw myself as a shimmering, crystalline energy body. I was nearly white but when I thought “white” I was corrected. No, its silver.

I was told this is what my energy now looks like. I could clearly see my arms. They looked like they were covered in silvery-white, iridescent armor without seams. So beautiful!

I wondered about the lights. I heard, “Antecedent”. This caused me to pause for a moment. I was momentarily confused. Was this the grammatical version of the word or the version which meant, “to come before”?

I knew it was the latter.

Of course I asked,”Antecedent to what?”

I saw in my mind’s eye two different spirals, one silver, the other gold. They intertwined and spun together as if dancing. It very much resembled a metallic braid.

The information came through along with the image. I knew what I was seeing was a soul braid, a term I have only heard recently to describe a type of walk-in experience where another soul “walks in” but the current soul remains and the two share the physical vessel. They are braided together; merged.

It was then as if all the blanks began to fill in. Like someone turned on the lights.

 

What I Know

The colors are a process I have been through before. My chakras are being aligned and attuned. I was seeing and experiencing this attunement in a different way than before. Last time I had a dream of it. This time I am feeling it. The attunement is a preparation for another energy to assume control over the chakras. They must be precisely attuned for this to occur. Not necessarily a higher vibration but a purer one.

With seeing the colors I often get a strange buzzing in my crown chakra. This last time, last night, I felt as if I was being pushed OOB. I felt myself shifting to the right as if being pushed gently from the left. This startled me and I resisted. So I did not leave my body.

The information that came to me was that in May this year, when I had that profound experience where I felt to be two people in one body, was in fact that. The other remained, remains to this day. I was told not long after that that we were merged. This essentially means the soul braid is complete. Presently, another step is about to be taken. I am being asked to “step back” and allow this other me to come forward and “take the reins” again.

Oddly, I am not freaked out by this. The experience I had in May was so sublime, so beautifully spectacular in every imaginable way that there is no way I am going to say no to another opportunity to experience something like it again! However, I am told this time it will be “different”. How, I am not sure.

I am told that this other part wants to experience this life for a time and that he/she wants to “teach me some things” and will do so when this “transfer” occurs (now I know why I said a “transfer” the other morning!). I felt from this communication that there is a great opportunity to learn on both our parts by participating in the transfer.

When asked when this will occur, the other me just said, “Whenever you decide to let go”. Which, of course, means I must be willing to give up the pilot’s seat. Considering I did it before, I don’t think it will be an issue. However, I am reminded that last time I never actually gave up control, I just shared it. Can I actually give it up? What would that be like? Hmm

Walk-In/Soul Braid

The third-eye and accompanying heart chakra activity I have been experiencing on a near constant basis is evidence of the successful soul braid. I know that now.

I honestly can’t believe this is happening to me. I was led to the idea of walk-in months ago (prior to May) but it never quite made sense to me. Why would I be told walk-in when it is evident that I am STILL here? Yet I did experience something profound and have since been so much more connected than I have ever been with my guide/HS/companion traveler (not really sure what to call him now!).

It now makes so much sense to me! The other soul walked-in in May and initiated the merge/braid at that time. The connection or braid was made official not long after when I was told “the merging is complete”.

I feel honored to be in this situation. I cannot explain it nor can I describe the deep connection, the love and devotion that I have for my Companion (that is what he wishes to be called – so be it). Call me crazy or whatever but I wouldn’t have it any other way.