Day #7

Today is the final day of my gratefulness challenge. I will continue to count my blessings as part of my daily, morning routine but I won’t be blogging about them anymore. I have found that in focusing on my blessings daily my mood is boosted, especially when I am thinking about those things. However, once those things pass from my mind, the boost in my mood is lost. I have concluded that in order to maintain a more positive outlook, one should purposefully focus on those things for which they are grateful throughout the day, making a habit of it.

Today I am grateful for:

  • Being a woman. Not only is the female physical form the more attractive of the sexes (to me anyway), but it offers up so much more in the way of experience than that of the male physical form. The experience of carrying a child in my womb, of giving birth, and of becoming a mother is one I will always cherish. There is nothing more beautiful in this world than the connection/bond between mother and child. I remember when I was pregnant with my last child. Though it had been accidental, I cherished every moment of that pregnancy from his first movements and kicks to the intuitive connection I had with him even while he was in my womb. The female body changes, blooms/blossoms along with the growing baby. I was my most beautiful when I was pregnant.
  • My five senses and what they allow me to experience via this physical body. When I think of all the senses, my most favorite is the sense of touch. My memories from childhood and other cherished moments in my life come first as a sensation of touch and the intimacy that comes with it. After that the sense of hearing would be my next most cherished perception. Followed by taste, smell and sight. I rank sight as last because there is so much more to be seen than the physical eyes allows. This may sound crazy, but in this life I have often wished to be blind at times so as to not be distracted by what my physical eyes perceive. I feel that if I lost my sight, I would be forced to rely on my inner vision, which is far superior.
  • The Kundalini. I wasn’t sure I would include the Kundalini in my list but upon considering it, I must say that it’s activation has changed me far more than any spiritual experience I have had to date. I do not regret the experience of it nor do I wish it to go away. I eagerly await its return because each time it visits (or should I say she?) I am changed for the better.
  • Life. I am ALIVE and grateful to be so.
  • The Earth and all she provides. In my memories of before and between lives I see Earth from a distance. I have also viewed Earth from space while OOB. Every time I see her I am overcome with love for her. She is so beautiful, so unique, so perfect. She can be soft, gentle and nurturing but she can also be brutal and cruel. She is the epitome of duality. And as I type this I am reminded of how similar she is to the Kundalini and I know it is because the Kundalini is alive and active in her as much as it is in me. The Kundalini has taught me that we, the Earth and I, are connected; One.

Day #6

Today I am grateful for:

  • My physical body. It is the vehicle through which I can experience physical reality.
  • My family and the foundation they provided me this life. Without them I would not have the personality and perspective that I have today.
  • My dad. Though you passed away in 1995 your guidance both during life and even in death provided me with some of the most impactful lessons of my lifetime. Your hearty laugh, zest for living, persistence and ability to push the limits of this physical reality even when what you did was against the grain of what society deems “right” is a reminder to me that life is meant to be LIVED not feared. Thank you for that. I love you.
  • My guidance (Team). They are my spiritual family, the ones who are always there observing, advising and supporting me through this life. Most never come to know their guidance. They go through life oblivious to the other world/family that is constantly assisting them and loves them unconditionally. For some reason I chose to be close with my Team during this life and though it has its drawbacks and challenges, I cannot imagine my life without them in it.
  • Astral travel/OBE. The main tool used by my guidance to communicate and connect with me. It provides me with so much: The ability to meet members of my Team in person which has been a Godsend in times of darkness for me, perspective I would otherwise not have had, numerous lessons and experience, access to other dimensions and realities, and so much more.

Day #5

A full work week of counting my blessings has already passed! So far, I have enjoyed focusing on the positive and it has made an impact on my day’s outlook. It is has not been significant enough to transform me into an optimist, however. Perhaps once a pessimist, always a pessimist? Still, I prefer the term “realist”. To me this means not seeing the cup as half empty or half full but seeing the cup as it is.

Today I am grateful for:

  • Hugs. I got a group hug from a first grade class I watched this morning for a half hour. They didn’t want me to leave. They hugged me so enthusiastically that I almost fell over. Imagine twenty first graders surrounding you in a hug. Yeah. I felt special and loved.
  • Love, especially a child’s love. There’s nothing quite like it.
  • Cars/transportation. This morning it was in the 20’s and I imagined how it would be to make my commute on foot or with a horse and carriage. I am so very grateful to have a reliable car with a heater (and heated seats) to get me where I need to go fast. Just a 100 years ago this would have been unheard of.
  • Communication, not only spoken word but all kinds of communication. Imagine what it would be like if you couldn’t communicate? I am reminded of Helen Keller.
  • Art in all forms. Art is the soul’s language. I grew up drawing/painting and singing. My older sister and I would make up entire world’s, creating drawings and stories and acting out scenes. When I drew a picture, it wasn’t just a drawing, it was an entire story with characters and experiences. It was a joyful time in my life.

 

Day #4 and Dream: Saxophone

Day 4 of my gratefulness challenge. Today I am grateful for:

  • Sleep. 🙂 I always want more but am happy for what I get. I had awful insomnia from 2011-2013 on and off.
  • Heaters, especially space heaters. It is still too cold here in Texas for my liking!
  • Coffee – goes with the cold days! I didn’t start drinking coffee until I lived in Alaska back in 2001-2002. Nothing like negative temps to drive you to a habit even if it is a tasty one.
  • Sight (vision). I use to have awful eyesight (can you say blind?) and got Lasik in 2000. Even though I have to wear glasses/contacts now my vision is pretty decent even without correction. Every day I wake up and can see my alarm clock without having to get within a foot of it is a good day!
  • Friends and helpful neighbors. My neighbor is a godsend for watching my littlest on short notice.

Speaking of insomnia, I’ve been awake since 4:30am but am glad I got the 6 hours I got. Seems like I don’t need near as much sleep as I use to these days.

Dream: Saxophone

I had a marathon of dreams last night but this one is worth recounting.

I walked into a small classroom building that was very obviously a music room with carpeted walls. There were instrument cases all around and I spotted a saxophone case. I played sax in high school so I opened up the case and pulled it out. Even though I knew it wasn’t mine, I played a few notes and was pleased I hadn’t lost the ability to play. It sounded nice and smooth. I played a scale, noticing the sound and feel of the pads as I played. Eventually I put it back in the case. However, I decided to fill the case with water. I don’t know why I did this. After I left I worried about it because I knew the water would rot the pads. I hesitated several times and finally chose to go back to empty the water and fix my mistake. Unfortunately, the kids were coming back to the room so I didn’t go in.

Then I was talking to the student whose sax I had flooded. The student had short, black hair and appeared to be a boy but then I thought, “This is a girl!” However, there were no identifying features to prove gender. The student told me that he/she had stayed home sick the day he/she found the sax flooded and was very hurt that someone would do such a thing. Then he/she didn’t return to school but stayed in bed with his/her dog who was elderly and sick. I remember him/her showing me a photo of his/her twin – a child with short, blonde hair  who was also genderless. Both children were about 8-9 years of age. The dark haired one told me all about his/her twin and was eager to share but this is when I woke up.

Interpretation

It’s interesting to me that I keep having dreams with adults and children whose gender is undefinable. They appear asexual. The twin theme is also recurring.

The saxophone is a dream symbol I can’t recall ever having. To see and/or play a saxophone in a dream indicates a need to express one’s self from deep within. It also indicates I’ve made a deep connection with someone. Water is emotion so since I flooded the sax with water, perhaps I flooded the person I have a deep connection with, with emotion? Considering the person’s whose sax I flooded was dark haired and a twin, I suspect that the emotional overload is this other’s person’s and that I am the cause. I felt bad in the dream and wanted to correct my mistake.

Additionally, a sick dog represents a neglected friendship.

Finally, I keep having dreams with elements of music especially being either a part of or seeing an orchestra, though they are never playing music but preparing to. Orchestras represent inner integration, resolution and harmony and incorporating various aspects of one’s life for smooth functioning. It appears that I am working on or preparing to integrate various aspects.

I am hoping this dream and others like it are a positive sign of my progress. It is hard to tell, especially since I keep waking up from these kinds of dreams feeling very pessimistic.

 

Day #3 and Dreams

Day #3 of the gratefulness challenge.

I am grateful for:

  • A warm coat on a cold day. It was 37 degrees outside this morning!
  • Singing.
  • Children.
  • My intuition.
  • Source/God.

Some dreams from this morning.

Dream: Zombies

This dream was primarily me avoiding zombies and lasted a good chunk of the night. I ended up going in through a window to try and get away from hoards of zombies and found some inside. A person was in there saying not to worry, these zombies were tamed and under this person’s control. There were 50. I remember thinking, “Oh wow, you can tame them?” lol

Dream: Shasta

I was traveling with my family through the mountains of California. We were going to visit Mt. Shasta and the mountains were dotted with bicycles and gear left behind by travelers. I received a message via text by a person who I know as Helen. She was apologizing for not knowing me in her dreams and telling me that I had moved past a certain point, a point she had not been able to pass yet. This made me “see” things in the dreamstate that others could not. She was under the tutelage of another person we both know. I recognized her in the dream but did not become lucid. I was also talking to my cousin via phone and he was telling me the restaurant would be open soon (continued from another dream). I remember the reception was bad because of the mountains. As we got to the top I remember someone asking what would happen when it got dark. I said the mountains would light up. I saw them dotted with lights. It was beautiful.

Dream: Discussing the Feminine Energy

I was inside a restaurant that had closed but would soon be opening again. I was arranging tables along the wall and talking to a man. After arranging the tables, I met up with one of my guides. I hugged him and felt a familiar energy, not his but mine. It came with a longing to embody my female energy completely but I needed a male counterpart in order to do so. I asked my guide, “Can you do this for me?” He replied, “No, only your counterpart can.”

Day #2 and Dreams

Day two of my gratefulness challenge and I’m already seeing changes in my mood. As I drove into work I was actually thinking of all the things I am grateful for and by the time I arrived I had my five for today and then some. My entire day was brighter because of it.

I am grateful for:

  • Music. I don’t know where I’d be without it!
  • Sunrises. Today’s was especially spectacular.
  • Alone time. I really enjoy my commute to and from work especially. Probably because I get to be alone AND listen to music at the same time! 🙂
  • Nature in all it’s forms.
  • Dreams. I don’t think I need to go into detail here. You all know how much I love my dreams.

Speaking of dreams…

I had some of note that I wish to document.

Dream: Renovated House

I was in my sister’s old bedroom. I was not alone and commented that I knew where I was. I saw the gold, shag carpet and then it shifted into an almost white, more modern carpet. We walked into the hallway and I looked into the bathroom and noticed that it was nothing like I recall. I said to my friend, “We renovated it all. I don’t like it.” For some reason I missed the gold and green laminate. lol

Interpretation

I think this dream is an indicator of positive change. The house in the dream was from my very early years, the first house I ever lived in. That it is renovated indicates a renovation of that time period.

Dream: Red Snake

I was with a group and discussing a video that was taken. I entered into the video as we talked. I saw my brother standing by a swollen creek that was barred by two, silver chains. I ventured beyond them to investigate and saw a large, python-like red snake. I took video of it, capturing it’s almost 6 foot length. Then, as I turned to leave, I noticed it was chasing me. I was not afraid but called to my friends to find them. I asked, “Where are you?” They called back, “Four!” I saw large signs on a pier and located the number 4. I climbed up to the pier and the snake was behind me. He grabbed my leg and squeezed but I kicked him off.

Interpretation

Video in this dream is indicative of the past and past issues/challenges/lessons. The first video is one I am going into, which is more about current issues than past. The snake is most definitely the Kundalini. It’s color could be related to the root chakra. It chases me and I often feel like the K energy is pursuing me, so this makes sense. The number 4 could be representing this numerological cycle for me. I have entered into a 4 year.

Dream: Intruder

I left the snake and joined my group. We continued to discuss videos and I uploaded several of my past – one from 5th grade and one from Halloween. I noticed a stranger was sending me PMs and I didn’t know him but he seemed to know me. He had a name like Vishtu, something foreign. His English was bad and he wouldn’t stop PM’ing me so I blocked him.

Then we talked about a man that kept coming into the house uninvited. I said I didn’t want him in the house. As I said this, I could see the man. He was a blonde man I don’t recognize. A man I was with said to me, “Then we’ll fix it.” He pulled out a gun and shot the blonde intruder in the heart and he fell to the ground.

Interpretation

Again the videos are reviewing the past. In this particular dream I think I was avoiding something or someone related to my past, though who is uncertain. Perhaps it is the man who I feel is intruding in my “house”. This is likely an aspect of me I wish to kill off and which is killed off in the dream.

 

 

 

 

Gratefulness Challenge

Today I read an article discussing how to make yourself more optimistic. Since I consider myself a realist (pessimist in denial lol) I figured I would read it all the way through. One of the suggestions was to write down five things every day that you are grateful for. Do it for one week and see how it changes your perspective. I thought it was a good idea, so started today. Funny enough, when I got home tonight a friend on FB had posted that she was participating in a gratefulness challenge. Ha! Love how the universe works!!!

So here are my 5 things for today in no particular order. 🙂

I am grateful for:

  • The sun and warmth today. A thunderstorm hit in the early morning hours but as the sun rose, the sky cleared and it warmed to 72 degrees. My kind of day!
  • My three beautiful children. They bring me joy every day.
  • My health.
  • My job and the financial security it brings me.
  • My home/Home.

I plan to do this for at least a week, maybe longer. I will try to post daily, but that may or may not happen considering I am back to work full-time. Join me if you like! 🙂

In Other News…..

I woke my two oldest up early and sent them to the bus stop and they didn’t have school today. Ooops! lolol

All day my heart chakra has been fired up – higher heart, too. My throat has also been very active. Feels like a snake is wound around it and trying to choke me. Ugh. Thankfully, no sickness. Knock on wood.

During my lunch break I saw this sitting across from me:

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No big deal except that it is. I saw it the first time on 12/12/16 and forgot about it. It came along with more 11’s than I could count. When I saw it today I laughed because I realized this box has been sitting there the entire time I’ve been working at this place. Look really closely where it comes from…..

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Sometimes I think Tennessee is stalking me. LOL

Finally, just because it was so odd – On my commute home today at 4pm I was behind two very obviously drunk drivers. One was on a four lane highway scaring everyone who tried to pass them, the other on the interstate. I mentally sent them a note: New Year’s Eve was two days ago…. 😉