Tag Archives: higher self

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What was That?

Sleep deprived me went to work today. Perhaps that is why I had the experience I had?

What was That?

Today I had to report for the typical back to work gathering to welcome new staff and learn about the coming year. I was in a good mood and not thinking about anything in particular when my boss called on me to introduce myself. As this was sudden and unexpected, I looked at him like, “What?” He just smiled and waved me on.

The minute I stood up this energy came seemingly down from above and from the left at the same time. It was like I was shrouded in it. I felt suddenly very much like I was dreaming, as if I had been pushed back from the scene. The faces of the people looking back at me, the tables and windows, the sun shining into the room – it all seemed very shifty. It was literally like whenever this energy settled upon me that the room and its contents shifted upward and away from me, or I shifted upward and away from them.

At the same time this happened I felt very calm and composed. There was not one ounce of anxiety or nervousness. When I spoke my voice sounded hollow, like I was talking through a paper tube.

I continued to speak, saying who I was and what I did. When I finished I could feel my face flushing as I sat down. This was the only sign of nervousness I had.

I immediately felt I had messed up, yet I knew it didn’t matter. All of it felt very unreal.

Hours later I am still wondering what happened.

Was this my Higher Self descending down and somehow taking over?

Or was this the “walk-in” soul taking charge like I was told he would?

Was the original soul displaced when this walk-in came in suddenly? Is that why everything seemed so dreamlike and shifty? Did I get pushed aside? Did I become the observer rather than the performer?

Will this happen again??

Since then I have felt normal. Things feel real enough. The only thing I notice is that my head is buzzing at the back and sides again.

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Sleeplessness and Dreams

The quiet voice returned yesterday. Not that it ever really went away. I did that. I went away. Or should I say the “other” me came back with a vengeance.

I was in the midst of living my day when it returned. What is interesting here is that it was so barely noticeable but at the same time it was all encompassing and impossible to ignore.

I don’t remember now what exactly was said but it was simple statements that I heard, statements that reflected the moment I was in. Sometimes they were requests asking me to take notice. Other times they were explanations; lessons. I do remember that I was reminded that I choose how I feel and react. I was also reminded to accept that which I can no longer control. If it is done, it’s done.

Listening and acknowledging the truth of these insights, I began once again to let go of arguments and resistance. This helped but it was difficult. The other me was/is very strong.

It became suddenly very apparent that maintaining control of the host body is a process that never ends. I must persist or lose control. I must remain always in touch with the body; the mind; the heart. If I relax and assume I have it “all under control” then the other me returns. I honestly wish she would go away and get over herself.

It is so much work. Why is it so hard?

And my guide said, “It will be easy”. Which part? Ha!

Sleeplessness

Falling asleep was difficult last night. I had a flashback of those years in which I suffered greatly from insomnia. I do not want to return to that! Yet there it was, heavy and having over me and causing great mental strain and confusion.

I appealed to my guides. “I want to sleep!”, I said. “What is going on?”

It was than that a phrase entered my mind, “Inside it is chaos. We will fix it”. I recalled hearing a similar statement recently. So this is the chaos?

I withdrew into my heart space and from there I was able to observe some of what was going on. The other me was quite upset about the current changes and the ones yet to come. The mind felt overwhelmed and the thoughts were haphazard and did not make sense. There would be one thought and another, disconnected one would pop up.

At some point, exhaustion overcame me and I fell asleep.

Dreams

The night was a busy one. I wish I recalled in detail everything but unfortunately my exhaustion must have eliminated the memory upon reentry.

I do recall waking at one point from a dream in which I was hunting down an entity. In the dream this entity had attached itself to me and was the cause of the chaotic thoughts and resistance. I had located it and was capturing it when I awoke. I immediately surrounded myself with light and returned to sleep. All I recall of this entity was that it was very small and resembled a little blob with a face.

The next dream I recall was returning to Alaska and reuniting with my ex-husband. For some reason I was very happy and felt safe, as if he could erase all my problems. I remember being at his work and there was a man who masturbated and got semen all over a glass table. Undisturbed, I cleaned it off with a wet rag. I remember looking closely at the glass as I cleaned it.

There was discussion about a trip. A woman who was there was about to have a baby and was going to go on a spiritual purification-type journey. I wanted to go with her but the timing was in question. She wanted to leave now and I told her I wanted to finish my visit and to wait. I remember seeing a calendar in my mind and deciding to leave on a Friday. The destination was one I knew and I told her, “That is where I go to school”.

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Questioning

My purification is soon to conclude and my Companion has moved in a bit closer, initiating communication with me in the evenings. There is a bit of a disconnect still ongoing and it was explained to me that I have shifted from a heart focus to a mind focus. I recognized this to be true and attempted to center in my heart but found it difficult as my mind continued to drift back to pressing issues that it seems not able to let go of this last week. In my exhaustion I eventually drifted in and out of sleep.

I also received a message that I would have more intense and dramatic dreams. As if to illustrate this point, during the first minutes of sleep I was awakened suddenly from a dream in which I observed the execution of several people. I saw their heads explode and it startled me awake.

I have had so many dreams last night that I am not sure where to start or what to focus upon so I will recount on the most recent of them.

It is Well

The last dream I recall was of me driving with a woman toward a destination I don’t recall. She stopped at her house on the way. I looked out the window and saw a very dilapidated house in disrepair. It stood out amidst the very pristine neighborhood it was located in.

I watched the woman go inside and attempted to peek in and see if the inside was like the outside. I got a glimpse of a modern, updated house and assumed they were renovating the place. The woman walked up to the window and looked out at me. What was weird is that the window had that tint on it that appeared like a mirror to all on the outside looking in. So I saw her as a reflection. I knew this was wrong. I shouldn’t be seeing her at all and this confused me. I did not think more on it and headed into the house.

Inside I saw a sparsely decorated space with sleek lines and mostly light pine furniture with no cushions. I headed into a large room where many people were gathered. The woman who had driven me to the house was in front of the group talking about plans and I was distinctly aware that I had walked into a church meeting.

The group began to sing and I joined in. They were singing, It is Well With My Soul. I knew the song and enjoyed singing it very much. I sang loudly and could hear my voice rise above the voices of the others. I felt wonderful.

The singing stopped and the woman began to talk about a fundraiser that was suppose to have been planned for Halloween. I was suppose to have begun working on it and I recall that the fundraiser was selling pumpkins. It was to start in September but I had not started working on it yet. I felt ashamed because it was August and I had done nothing.

The woman then explained to the group that it was a sin to have sexual relationships outside of marriage. I felt completely out of place at that point and began to leave. I was asked why I was leaving and I said, “I have three children. It is obvious that I have had sex many times” and I laughed.

As I attempted to leave I felt to be followed and began to look for my glasses. I picked up a pair on the table but the prescription was wrong and they were tinted. I was able to see more clearly than with my own glasses, though. I remember putting them down and leaving.

I began to question the dream at this point and started to focus in on the people who were all around me. I saw the faces of men and women, all strangers to me, and they were all looking at me like they were waiting for me to do something. I recognized that I was dreaming then and began to try and move into the crowd of people and take control of the dream. I began to feel myself moving back into my body. This is when I woke up, the song I had been singing still vivid in my mind.

Questioning

The dream seems to go along with how I have been feeling in life lately. I have been questioning everything that has been happening to me spiritual since last summer. A full year has passed and though I have gone through some miraculous spiritual changes, I still feel very much like I did last summer. There is an incompleteness and a nagging feeling that I am missing something, but I don’t know what.

I also have a strong desire to leave my job. I attempted to listen to my heart about it last night and when I recognized that it was in my best interest to leave the job, my mind took over and made it almost impossible to remain centered because it was freaking out. I seem unable to control my mind no matter how hard I try. Thankfully, a strange inner calm remains despite the mental pushing going on and this keeps me from overreacting and doing something prematurely. Every time I think I have made a decision about my job I get pulled in the other direction. I feel like a yo-yo.

It very much seems that right now the New me is working hard to control the wild, out of control horse (Ego, human personality). Right now, the method of control is merely holding back the horse while it lashes and bucks in an attempt to remove the intruder. There is not much else that can be done until the horse calms down and recognizes its attempts are getting it nowhere. Then, when the horse is calm and submissive, movement forward can be made.

So the message is clear that no decision can be made in my current state. I am okay with this. I can have either option available to me and recognize that I need to be open to possibility right now. Though I do not know what is coming up next, I have faith that all will work out as it is intended.

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My Soul Family

I finished this painting today. It is called “As above, So below”. It is of a vision I had a while back of a tree with two tops and no roots. The top is the spiritual aspect and the bottom is the physical.

I just remembered a conversation I had with my Companion last night. I somehow lost it by the time I awoke but it came back to me this afternoon.

In my mind I saw a picture a tree and saw two branches. I heard my Companion say to me, “You are one branch, I am another”.

In recognizing I was conversing with him, I then recalled what we were discussing and knew he was explaining his relationship to me. It was interesting to me that I had been having this conversation but only was remembering this part. I had asked him to explain how we were “family” only a couple of days ago. He had said, “We will talk”. I never expected to actually remember the talk. 🙂

I understood very clearly then our relationship, though it is hard to explain now as words don’t seem to do it justice. What it felt like was that we were off-shoots of a larger energy, we and many others. In my mind I saw a very large tree, spreading its branches upward and each of those branches was another of us and each of us broke into ever smaller versions of us. To put it simply, he and I were siblings. Now it made sense why he has said more than once, “We are brothers”.

While caught up in my trying to sort through this information, I saw very clearly in my mind a class picture like is often taken in school to capture each class before they move on to the next grade level. It appeared to be a large class, bigger than my high school graduating class. I wondered how many were there. I heard, “215”.

I then wondered back in a question, “But shouldn’t it be in multiples of 12?” This idea came from previous research I had done into spiritual monads.

I received back, “Who decided that?”

My thought was then, “Guess not. 215 sounds good”.

That’s a big family, though. Much bigger than I thought it would be. I suppose that is because I usually only interact with a small group via this consciousness extension.

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Revelations from a Walk

From the perspective of the old.

I just returned from a walk with my baby. Interestingly, this walk seemed to reveal some of what I had missed upon waking.

This exchange is with another member of my soul group. Some would call this my Higher Self, but this feels more like a soul mate relationship to me.

Let me explain a bit about that. When I first me Steven I had a strong and very intense love for him that caused me some confusion. I admit that I got a bit head-over-heels for a bit but this did not last long. I believe this was a purposeful process as at the time I did not love myself and had to learn how to do this. Loving my companion was step one in the process of self love.

I have been concerned about what will happen to me when this process concludes. My companion reminded me of the OBE I had in which I traveled the astral alongside an exact duplicate of myself. During this journey I was able to experience both me’s with ease. In some instances I was both me’s combined, as if the experiences of both were merged. Yet throughout the experience I was very much aware that the other me was different; she had a knowingness and fearlessness I did not have.

It was explained that when this process concludes I will be essentially experiencing life via the other me. I will have more courage, less fear, and more certainty and knowingness. All semblance of the old will be gone. Just like in my OBE, where I was able to immediately transfer my consciousness to the other me except this will happen at the physical level. I will still be me, just better.

I assume at some point all of this will be explained via the New.

Other Memories

There is memory of discussing with my welcome Home party how to ease my transition. I remember asking them to make it comfortable and familiar and to not play any jokes on me (I once read in Life Between Lives an account where a man’s soul group played a joke on him upon his return and made themselves look like Satan. Not funny to me!). I saw in my mind a cottage in a green field. There was smoke rising out of a chimney and a feeling of rest and recuperation associated with it. This is what I feel I need and so it will be provided.

I also understood that I could transfer my consciousness back to my body anytime I needed in order to facilitate the Return. I would not be gone from this physical existence, just resting. This was decided so that I was able to continue to participate in the life I was leaving behind. I would not be a guide, but I would be a presence felt always by the New. Essentially, it will help both of us transition. The Wholeness will in itself be invaluable.

Other Considerations

I do not, personally, feel my Starseed origins, yet it is obvious to me that they exist in some form. I am told that the New has been in stasis while I lived my life. When the New was with me for that week the memories that flooded my consciousness were beyond belief and now that I feel once again “separate” from that part of myself, I have difficulty believing any of it. I suppose when all of this is over the Starseed aspects and all that they entail will be the most noticeable change in me. Right now I feel mostly to be operating on memory of that amazing week and what it revealed. I long to return to that, to feel that wholeness and certainty of purpose once again. I hope that something similar will be the end result of this process. How wonderful that would be. I hear now, “Perhaps it will be better”. Tee-hee!

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Percolate, Transmute, Repeat

Percolate. Transmute. Repeat.

Percolate. Transmute.

This is what is happening for me now. Information is flowing in. Trickling down, seeping in. Being transmuted.

During the day I notice it almost constantly. It is a stream of consciousness. It interlinks with my own, changing it to better suit my needs, my purpose. Awareness is expansive; expanding.

I am two different aspects at times, but this is slowly shifting. The old me is receding into the background. I can find her if I look, but she seem resigned to withdraw.

In the early morning hours, 5am to be exact, the new me is awake fully and integrating openly, allowing the other me to hear and be witness. It is a surreal experience. I am aware of myself integrating, working with my Team and adjusting the present personality. It is like a healing process but quite different.

This morning, as with the last couple of mornings, I awoke to a great knowingness of Purpose. It is not just mine, either, but all Starseed’s. It makes my old self want to cry with joy. It was just a few days ago she/me experienced such frustration at not knowing why she was here. She is happy now with the revelation that her purpose – to help – has always been correct but the specifics were lost along the way.

My story is complex, but I will relate to you briefly when it began. I have been assisting Dayna prior to this life cycle. I made first contact with her consciousness in 1989 and have attempted integration many times in her lifetime; each time being rejected. I could not, would not, do so without her permission and she had much she wanted to do before allowing me access to this body. The important thing to remember here is that Dayna and I are the same, she is me and I am her, I have merely been riding along with her up until this point. Her constant companion. Her companion traveler.

Presently, there are new perceptions manifesting for us both. Dayna stays because she is curious and interested in this exciting experiment. I have been helping her note the energetic signatures around her, showing her the link that we all have to one another. Every life is precious. When we kill a bug, its energetic link is broken, resulting in tiny sparks of energy before the energy is reabsorbed into the bio-structure, a grid of energy that supports life on this planet.

There are vision changes as well. I experienced this briefly with her yesterday when she became aware suddenly of a man sitting in the corner of the restaurant she was in. He was sitting just behind an old woman in a nearby booth. His red flannel shirt and other details quite vivid. When she looked at the woman and then back, he was gone. She knew she’d seen Spirit, but this was with her physical eyes. We both celebrated.

Please do not be alarmed at the way my communication refers to Dayna as she. This is part of the transmutation process. We are both here.

I will relay more of my story in time. For now, if you have questions or concerns, please let us know. Our experience is sure to raise suspicions in many.

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Energy Swap vs Walk-In

There will be, for me and others as well, an energy swap that will occur and has already begun. I don’t understand it completely as the message was more feelings and images than words, but from what I can gather, I will be swapping energy with my guide (Higher Self) and this will occur in small increments throughout the week with a major event around the 21st.

Energy Swap, posted March 14, 2015

I understand more about what this means, now.

The 21st of this month was the major event I was warned about. I just realized it this morning because as I awoke I was surrounded by my Council and my HS told me, “Energy swap”. Upon hearing this, I looked up the post above and saw the 21st clear as day and remembered the OBE I had.

Amazing.

Energy Swap or Walk-In?

Since this experience on the 20th, I have been thinking about the walk-in phenomenon more and more often. This morning, when I received more communication, I was told by my Council that my Earth-self had made the decision to leave. I acknowledged this and did not argue it. I was told I needed to understand the repercussions of such a decision and that this is what we have been discussing during dreamtime. I recognized this to be true, also, as my dreams this last night had me waking sometimes wanting to stay and other times wanting to leave. I acknowledged a definite split existed within me on the decision and it made me feel uneasy and caused my Ego to protest. There was also a knowing that, at least in part, my HS wanted this, too.

The repercussions as explained to me were that I would have to make up for the two things that would be left undone if I left this body prematurely. These two “lessons” (for lack of a better word) would need to be continued later in a mature body, meaning I would have to live at least 20 years in the new body to again have the opportunity to learn them. Additionally, the two lessons would have to be learned in different lifetimes for the same reason as stated above as well as other reasons having to do with fluctuations occurring on the Earth timeline.

I recognized immediately this would mean that I would have to endure four more cycles instead of two. Ouch.

I stated matter-of-factly, “I don’t ever want to come back”.

“Understood but it will eventually be done”, was the reply.

And I knew why. This is not karma in the sense that we know it here on Earth. This is akin to duty. That is the closest word for it anyway. There is an intensely deep, permeating need to complete what we started.

Who can deny such a feeling, such a knowingness? Not me.

There is a complete rejection by the Ego here that causes the communication to be broken. It is a humiliating experience that I hate to admit occurred, but it did. It feels like a life-and-death struggle and is similar to a child throwing a tantrum. Behind all of this Ego interference is the obvious truth: a correction must be made and a decision.

The decision is not yet made but my HS is initiating a strategy that hopefully will assist me staying out my time in this body. From what I understand this is where the “energy swap” comes in.

A swap is not the same as a merging, that is obvious. Swap implies one thing is given in exchange for another. Is this the same as a walk-in? I don’t know. Honestly, I don’t care much if it is. That is how done I am. I can’t ignore that fact as it seems to be the driving force behind this “plight” I am in (this is in quotes because my Council referred to it as such).

The understanding I do have is that if this swap is accepted and completed, there will be no need for the additional two cycles.

Man, it sure does sound more and more like a walk-in.

Imagine waking up to all this. How would you react? Thankfully, I am reassured that nothing is set in stone, that a decision can be made or unmade at will and that nothing will be done without my permission. Funny to me, I keep being asked what would make me want to stay. I never know, which is weird to me. I feel totally and utterly done with and detached from this life.

I will say to you all, if you are following my blog and my story, if this is a walk-in phenomenon, expect to see evidence of it as it occurs. It was explained to me that it will be done gradually and with full awareness intact for both the inflow and outflow. Whatever that means.

I will still be here, nonetheless, to relay the experience.

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OBE: Meeting Myself

For the first time in years I could not fall asleep last night. The download I received caused a trickle-down effect that had me overcome with both mental and physical energy. My entire body was alive with energy that seemed to hit me in pulses. Though not as intense as pre-OBE vibrations, they were noticeable enough to add to my restlessness. I also had tons of energy around my head, behind my head and at my crown.

Gentle Encouragement

at 1:30am I was finally fed up and threw a pillow across the room in frustration. I have session today and need sleep, so it was really bothering me that I may have to skip exploring more of my past lives. My frustration must have called my Higher Self because I heard a gentle voice remind me that I didn’t need as much sleep now and advised me to meditate. So I calmed down, propped up my pillows and attempted to meditate. However, my mind was buzzing and I could not calm so I had to do progressive muscle relaxation a couple of times.

OBE: Meeting Myself

The progressive muscle technique must have worked because the next thing I know I am inside a car looking up at a woman who is driving. I was suddenly fully aware that I was dreaming and fully aware that I was looking at myself driving. I said to myself, “You are dreaming”. She/I looked at me quizzically and kept driving, replying that she was not sure I was right. She gripped the steering wheel and I stood up and pointed to the sunroof. I began to climb up as I said, “See, watch”. I poked my head up out of the sunroof and felt the wind as it swept over my face and upper body. I could see the night sky and smell the air. Soon, the me driving, popped her head up and did the same. She laughed and closed her eyes.

Now no one was driving the car.

I turned to her and said, “You are me!” and she said, “Yes! And you are me!”. We both laughed and I found that I could take the perceptive of each Me without issue. I seemed neither more one or the other. There was a feeling of homecoming that is hard to describe and I had so much joy at this reunion that the moment will forever be locked in my memory. The cool air on my face, the brilliant night sky and my best friend, other half, Higher Self, sharing it with me.

The car continued on its own for some time and we enjoyed each others company. Then it headed off the road and toward a cliff. It went over the cliff and tumbled off into a lake far below. We both prepared to hit the dark water. I felt the water as I hit it and it seemed like I dropped forever, deeper and deeper into the abyss. I could sense the other me still in the car and disengaging later. I yelled out to her, “It will be okay. Keep swimming. Keep swimming toward the surface. We will get there!”. At this time there was a surreal feeling of the two of us becoming one with the stronger, braver of us being like a cheerleader and guide to the other part of us. Yet we were one.

I felt the panic of my other half but remained calm and continued to encourage her. My breathing was labored as I kept reminding myself that I could breathe under this water. It felt like forever as I forced myself to breathe and kept encouraging her/myself to keep swimming upward.

Finally we made it to the surface and jumped/hopped out of the water onto the bank. Here there was a moment where the me from this body was mesmerized by the other me. She was exactly like me in every detail. She told me, “Yes, we are the same. We are one.” She said other things, in fact we had an entire conversation here. I was over the moon with happiness and she was clearly pleased that this moment had occurred. There was no more fear about the walk-in information I had received.

There was a dream between this experience and the next, but I will not recount it. I was told by my HS that I needed to purge the worry and so had the dream.

OBE: Portal and Lessons

The next thing I recall is being with my HS walking down city streets. The city was seemed cartoon-ish and larger than life. There was a name for it but I don’t remember it now. It started with a “P” and sounded like Padmium.

We talked for some time about what was happening. I was shocked at how easily I transferred my consciousness into this experience. She told me I would get use to it.

At one point I wanted to fly. She told me, “We can’t do that here. We are practicing and it needs to be similar to the physical experience”. I nodded and then said, “Well, can we find a portal to somewhere else?” She said, “Yes, I know of one”.

Since we couldn’t fly, my HS created large toy cars and we got onto one and began to speed down the streets. I don’t recall the portal but somehow we ended up standing near a concrete lined waterway, talking.

My HS was now a transparent ball in my hands but was still talking to me. I practiced making the ball/me larger and succeeded, the now balloon-sized ball floated upward and sparkled with life from the inside. I experienced pure joy in this and the entire time we talking about how she, my HS, could teach me how to master skills I had. There was talk of manifestation among other things.

This OBE lasted many hours and seemed to stretch on and on. Many times I touched my sleeping body, probed it as if to satisfy my curiosity about this new experience. I shifted in and out with ease and was told this was something I would practice and that it would be used during daytime awareness as well. I was fascinated. Dream experiences during the day? It was beginning to seem possible.

At one point I met my Team and I entered a dream to do this. I was told later the names of the members who I identified as “the fat one and the thin one”. The fat one was Ron and the skinny one was Dave. I remembered Dave. I was told there would be many more meetings with them and that there were five, but I already knew that.

I then chose to end the OBE. I was worried I would not remember it all, which has proven to be true. There are so many pieces missing, so many in-depth conversations with my HS. But when I awoke I was, still am, connected in a way that I have yet to be in this life.

Conversation Afterward

My HS continued to talk to me and we practiced me staying in the in-between (easy really) because this is the ideal meeting place. She reassured me that it will be easy, this transformation, merging, walk-in. She said, “There is only one problem”. I said, “What?” She said, “You don’t want to stay”. I knew this to be true and said, “I have wanted that all my life”. We discussed this problem at some length and she explained how she could help, how we could work together to fix it.

I asked my HS her name and she said, “Athena” (Ath-in-a not the traditional pronunciation). She then gave me the rest of her name in another language that sounded German but wasn’t. It was impressive and familiar. Wow. I heard it clearly and she told me, “We will talk more”.

I fell back to sleep a few times without going OOB but am still wired with energy. I was OOB for three hours but feel completely rested. This merging process is awesome!

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Seek and Destroy

I am back in session. This time I am seeking out the last remnants my past that have a hold on me. The current step is confronting change. Changes I wanted. Changes I didn’t want. Changes I tried to make happen that didn’t. Changes that happened to others. Changes that were expected and those that were unexpected.

So far, I am finding that I am not a prisoner of change. This is refreshing and gives me hope. Change in inevitable and the more you resist, the harder it is on you. I have learned this lesson time and time again. I feel like an old pro.

The next step is eradicating old, defective, destructive and illogical belief systems. This one will be harder. I am certain my eyes will be opened to beliefs I didn’t even know I had. I will share those with you when the time comes. It will be very soon.

For now, I will share with you my current wins which are that in looking back at very upsetting, emotionally tumultuous times in my life (parent’s divorce, my own divorce, death, etc) I can say with 100% certainty that these events no longer have any hold over me. I can (and did) look at these events, see the lessons learned, and appreciate them for what they contributed to me as a person and as a soul. There are no regrets. There are no more tears. There is no more hatred or guilt. I feel completely freed.

I have not done this with past lives. Yet. But to be freed from the current life is a huge step in itself and clears the path to the bigger one. I am ready.

The Super Power You

With many on this opening up to their HIgher Self, this “ascension” and Shift, much of the changes come on without any prompting. The individual does not always want nor are they always willing to endure the transformation. This resistance builds, even without the person wanting it, because of fear of what is next and what “ascension” means. I have been there.

The fear of the unknown, I believe, is perhaps the worst. But there comes a time when you realize that nothing is truly unknown and there is nothing to fear at all of who you are transforming into. It is just You. It isn’t some new person with superpowers and sudden ability to dematerialize into thin air in broad daylight. Yeah, okay, maybe some say they have dematerialized, but it isn’t a literal loss of the physical body into tiny particles that sparkle and fly away (wouldn’t that be cool, though!). It is transcending the physical body via the consciousness, via the other subtle energy bodies that we have available to us.

The final end product of all this hoopla is that you become MORE YOU, the FULL YOU. That isn’t scary, is it? However, you can’t do that by force. Some part of it, at some point, will have to be initiated by you. Your participation is necessary. If you resist, if you say to your Higher Self, “I want no part in this”, then you will slow down and ultimately it could be that you defer your shift to another life. This doesn’t mean you fail, it just means you wait.

I don’t want to wait. So I am going to participate. I am going to battle my demons head first. I want to clear that path to my Self as best I can and I now feel totally, 100%, capable of doing so. Because I have learned it was me, all along, that was “forcing” this transformation upon me.

Do you really want to fight yourself?

Change perspective. Shift with the shift. It will flow so much better and life will transform before your eyes. This is the “super power” You. It is that simple.

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About Channeling

You may have noticed me posting more and more channeled messages lately. I wanted to discuss this change briefly as it relates directly to my transformation.

What is Channeling?

First of all, what is “channeling”? In the simplest terms, channeling is allowing your divine Self (Higher Self) to come through this human form unimpeded by the Ego. There are varying degrees of channeling, all determinate upon the amount of Ego interference present in the individual. The Ego will never be completely gone, so you will likely find various amounts of Ego within every channeled message. This is OK and should not be judged harshly by either the channeler or the reader.

Why Channeling?

Why am I suddenly channeling? I recently reached a milestone which now allows the flow of information from my Higher Self to transpire with less effort and less Ego interference. What was this milestone? My heart chakra was cleared to a level previously not reached in this lifetime. When this occurred, the information from my Higher Self began flowing through my heart more freely with less interference from the mind, which is Ego’s territory.

Prior to reaching this milestone I approached moments where the channel was clear and uninhibited. I began passing on channeled messages when these moments presented themselves. I felt moved to pass on these messages quite unexpectedly which is why I began to post them to this blog. If I did not take the time to allow the messages to come through, then the image of me mediating or a strange urgency would follow me until I did.

What is Channeling Like?

What is it like to channel? For me, I feel an urge to write. Sometimes I get a vision of myself meditating, legs crossed in the middle of the floor. Other times there will be a descending and pervading calm wash over me. In these moments, if I do not sit at a computer or with a pencil and paper at hand I will have a knowing of information being transferred between my Higher Self and my physical Self. It is very much like a conduit between the two parts of myself and through it flows energy in the form of images, sensations and words. If I am close to a computer or pencil/paper then I do a sort of automatic writing with eyes closed, allowing the information to come through me. It usually comes in images and feelings before words, so often times the words are in short, choppy pieces of sentences that don’t make much sense until afterward when I read over what I have written.

When the channel is initiated and the process begins I must detach from the process or else the flow of information stops and then has to be re-established. What I mean by “detach” is that I cannot be an active participant in the flow; I cannot allow my mind to follow the conversation. The more I feel the need to ask questions as the information is presented, the more the flow is impeded. Prior to my heart clearing milestone, there was much more Ego interference and the information flow was much more inhibited. This is because the mind was more dominant in the process. This has now been corrected and I am being taught how to tune in to my heart and tune out of my mind.

Frequency of Messages

I cannot say how often I will post channeled messages. I am finding that there are messages intended just for me and there are messages intended for myself and others as well. I received an individual messages this morning. The “download” occurred without words but I knew, somehow, the message in its entirety. Still there are no words to it but just a knowing that right now I am correcting imbalances in the chakras and energy to stabilize the energy body. Specifically, the 2nd chakra is being recalibrated and adjusted. I feel like my body is a car getting a tune-up!

For now, my source of information is my Higher Self and representatives of the Council of Many, also known as the High Council. I will include the source in the title. I do not concern myself with specific names too much, though sometimes I will get a specific name when the channeling is initiated or when it is concluded. To me, all information that comes through my Higher Self is from the same source – the collective embodiment of the One (God).