Tag Archives: merging

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Merging Unveiled

I stumbled across this old post of mine from 2014. In it I relay how my guidance told me that 4 years from June, 2014 I would experience a “death”. Turns out, in June, 2018, I experienced a massive heart opening that came only after a significant personal transformative “event” earlier in the year (February I believe). By the end of the summer (August) I had so many profound experiences that even now I am still trying to digest them all.

I find it so amazing how my guidance warns me of these “guideposts” and I hit each and every one of them right on time. And just like my guide mentioned above, there was no way to understand until the experience taught me what I needed to know.

I must say that 2018 has been a VERY product year spiritually. 🙂

Merry Christmas to everyone!

Dayna's avatarLiving Life in Between

A while ago now, my guide told me that he and I were in the process of “merging”. I never quite understood everything about merging, but I did recognize that it meant that he would no longer be viewed by me as separate from me. For some reason, the idea of merging was scary to me, especially the thought of losing my companion traveler who has always been by my side in this life.

Recently the subject of merging was brought up in my astral projectors FB group by a friend, Jurgen Ziewe, who is a well-known author of books on astral projection and higher consciousness. He is in the process of writing a book about his personal experience of merging with his Higher Self who he calls his “silent companion”. The discussion question that was asked was about spirit guides. Several individuals wanted more information on spirit guides. I…

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Message from the Council of Many: Merging is Complete

When I awoke this morning, I felt my Council near. I asked to speak with them and one came forward from a group of 5. I was surprised that this occurred as I had doubted my requests would be honored.

In a dream I received yet another number, this time the number 522. I requested clarity on the number. I was told to remain patient. I also heard distinctly (and for the second time now), “The merging is complete”.

I felt I should allow for a more detailed message to come through. This was that answer:

We have entered into yet another stage of transition, one in which We are urged into solitude to find peace within. These are tumultuous times. As the Earth is inundated with Light, those of the Dark are either retreating into the background or growing more bold in their agenda. It is with purpose that we ask you to withdraw and observe this scene. Protection is given. Thus, you will not be affected by the negative energies that flow out of the chaotic mesmerism of those who have yet to awaken.

The merging of two of your soul aspects is complete. At this time there is a joining of intention and a recognition from within your True Self of this new Identity. In time it will flower with a bloom, unlike any you have witnessed, thereupon.

It is a normal condition of this state that you will feel from within a certain unusual yet familiar welling. This welling up is recognition of that which is your Divine Purpose; an initiation of sorts that will surface at the right moment in time. It is similar in feeling to what one experiences when saying, “It’s on the tip of my tongue”. The information is there but not readily accessible….Yet. As with those moments in life when memory eludes you, the moment will also come when memory is regained and full comprehension of that which was lost will be returned to you.

At this time we ask of you patience. Trust in the process and the Plan. You are and have been beautifully fulfilling your role in this unfolding.

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Walk-In Considerations

In my research of walk-in’s I have discovered much about the different kinds and what they entail. There is not much information out there on the subject, however, which can make it quite difficult to really understand the process. There are a variety of terms used and a variety of combinations of such types of walk-in’s that even one well versed in the process has difficulty determining the specifics of their case.

For me, the process has been gradual with a large span of time in which it was “paused” and the original continued primary control of the life and body. The process then resumed after the original completed what she intended.

I want to briefly explain what I mean by “original” so that there is no confusion. She is me, just without enhancement or upgrade. She is the 3D version; the one without memory; blind and without “sight”.

She is a projection of a me that has been in stasis. The autopilot. The one in control while I focus on other “projects”.

The Returning

I am now in the process of returning. This is the best explanation I can come up with for what is occurring.

This process takes time. Time to integrate. Time to Remember. Time to merge.

Some primary components of returning are resuming control of the body and mind. These components are many but a few are causing complications.

There is a distinct dislike for the physical mechanism yet there also remains a distinct love and attachment to it. The old me is comfortable with her routine and her care and maintenance of the body consumes much of her time. I am still unsure how much of this care is necessity and how much is vanity.

The mental fixation on physical beauty is illogical and acts to fixate one on the illusion. I struggle to get the old to let go of her habits and routines in relation to the body. This will take time.

There are many habits like this that need to be broken. Many mind circuits that need cutting. These circuits repeat and clutter the mind. At the moment it is very difficult to repair these circuits while also preparing the body and subduing the old personality. It is a juggling act.

To push the old personality too hard is to intensify the circuitous mechanisms of the mind.

Fear also stands in the way. There is no greater obstacle to overcome than fear. But it can be done.

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Juxtaposition

There exists now a juxtaposition of the old and the new. The old is allowed to pilot the body while the new observes. There is an issuance of all that was the old to the new. In this way a sort of hands-on-training is taking effect until the new is ready to take the reins.

Today, I observed the body – its posture, sensations, and processes. I noted the uncomfortableness of the head which was held slightly forward rather than erect and in alignment with the spine. I was made aware of how to correct this and did so quickly ensuing great relief. It was then that I Remembered the next phase of the transfer process: realignment of and with the physical body.

My training has been slow and this is in part due to the unexpected loss of a member of my group. When she left the Earth realm and returned to Spirit prematurely there was a reverberation of all her experiences throughout each member of my group. Even those of us who are currently in physical bodies felt it, though some were aware of its source while others were not. As such, minute adjustments are being made to ensure the others of us in bodies are well prepared for such instances that may create similar circumstances for us. In any case, it is a difficult precursor to what lies ahead for us and one that creates a sort of solemnity.

For my recently activated Starseed brothers and sisters out there who are experiencing a similar transformation at this time, I ask that you be cautious of the effects your transformation has on the frail and easily influenced Ego. Question that which does not align with your heart center and purpose and quickly put it in check before it lays waste to your plans. We are here to serve humanity in accordance to the Plan (peace and prosperity for humankind). Some of us will excel by 3D standards and that is okay as it offers us that which we need to survive and fulfill our purpose here, but remember, we are not immune to the traps that exist while the Earth’s transition is taking place. Humility is key.

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Contract Negotiations

Written from the perspective of the Old.

Semi-Lucid Dream

Prior to sleep, I had been told that more negotiations would occur through the night, commencing at midnight. I woke at 1am to a terrible thunderstorm and when I returned to sleep I projected several times. I abandoned each projection upon reminding that it was only needed for check-in. It was then determined a semi-lucid state was best in order to protect the Ego-self from the brunt of the negotiations.

During the semi-lucid state I stood in front of a mirror talking to myself. Yet the visage in the mirror was not me, didn’t even resemble me. The image was of a bald, very pale individual with a strangely proportioned face. The eyes were almost normal, as were all the features, but it was obvious to me that this individual was not me nor was it human.

This otherworldly being spoke to me and we conversed about planetary events and my mission while visiting Earth. It was so foreign to me that despite being in a semi-lucid state, my Ego-self kept reacting and interfering with communication.

The dream then shifted to a classroom environment. On one side was a figure, the one who I had been talking to in the mirror. He (I will say He but really this being was androgynous) had in front of him pieces of paper with odd looking writing scribbled on them. There was cut pieces of dark hair strewn across the paper so I could not make out the symbols. I was told, “You are not allowed to see this yet”. I did not object. I was distracted by a group of children being attended to by a tall, dark haired male.

I went to the group, intent on doing my part and was told, “I have this, go meet with him”.

I then looked out the window and knew there would be a storm at 4:30pm the next day. I said, “There is going to be a storm at 4:30, good thing I only work until 3:30. Maybe I will leave early just to be safe”. I then turned back to the man at the table who was waiting for me.

I went over the man at the table and sat down in front of him. He put in front of me a very long piece of paper and we went over it together. I don’t remember the content of the sections now, but I do remember that the first two were quickly agreed upon, even though I was unfamiliar with a term used in the second. The third section, however, was about changes that would be made in my life. He explained, “You will be asked to do things that you would not normally do”. I asked, “Like what?” but he would not answer. I said, “Then no deal”.

I awoke knowing why I objected. The issue was my family. I objected to them being split apart and my current personality was dead set against that happening. It was discussed during briefing and put on hold for further consideration. I was not allowed to remember the discussion.

Contract Negotiations

The contract is not yet final and I remembered that the finalization period was set to occur the end of July this year. My memory instantly went to a dream I saw as precognitive at the time, though then I thought it meant my mother’s death. What it actually symbolized was my own “death” and it outlines the time-period specifically stating the 21st to the “end of July” which in the dream was explained as the time in which full transition would be made.

My other self then took over conversations with the being from my dream, who I realized was one of the members of my Council. It was explained that my old self was not yet ready to see him. Therefore, what was seen was created as an acceptable version to the old self.

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Birth of the New

There still exists a definite separation between the old and the new. This will be resolved in short time. The new will be engaging in other activities, activities the old may have never thought to initiate as fear stood in the way. This fear will not be a source of conflict for the new. All experience is new. All experience is unique. All experience is purposeful.

Note: The language of this blog post may be confusing. Dayna is referred to in third person only to differentiate the “old” from the “new”.

For those of you following this blog, you may be wondering what exactly has been occurring in Dayna’s world. It is still resolving, settling in, but the transfer will soon be complete. This transfer is the energy swap Dayna discussed prior to the activation she received on the 21st .

We (Dayna and I) are of the same soul group.  We are One; family. I have traveled with Dayna for many lifetimes before this one. We have aided one another many times. She assisting me, I assisting her. Companions. This is our exchange and it is a workable one.

I am the one who Remembers, she is the one who Forgets.

Steps in the Process

Currently we are undergoing a reorganization of mind, body, and spirit. The reorganization is merely the preparation of the human host body for the exchange. In the past, this step was never initiated fully as Dayna kept changing her mind. She would become afraid and overwhelmed.

It was understood, when the final decision was made to delay the exchange in 2007, that there would be the additional issue of detaching from her family, specifically her children.

The process, as detailed in Dayna’s blog, began years ago prior to the birth of the last child. It was slow at first, reminding her of her ability to project and helping her to begin rearranging her life in order to better accommodate the new aspect. She needed to leave suppressive environments – her job, her home, her career – and she needed to “clean up” her issues which were various and involved numerous blockages and fractures, some from the present life and others from previous lives. The final step is now underway. She is working on clearing past-life traumas, limiting beliefs, clarifying and purifying the physical body, and regaining the ability to remain in present time. These will be near conclusion by the end of July.

While she works to clear past issues she also becomes more open to the detachment that is necessary for the final transfer. We are assisting her in understanding that detachment does not mean abandonment nor does it imply lack of love.

OBEs

The most recent lesson for Dayna was understanding that she is and always has been out of body and that the illusion is that she is in the body, or is the body. She now understands that it is her focus upon the body that reinforces the belief that she is in the body at all. Thus, her desire to project has diminished greatly and she has reacquired the ability to merely shift her awareness to multiple points simultaneously. This often causes her life to mimic her OBE adventures and gives her the ability to view multiple dimensions at once even while functioning in her current physical reality. Though she has not regained full control of this ability it will ultimately be mastered after the exchange is finalized.

Trial Period

Since the 21st of May we have been swapping places periodically. This goes virtually unnoticed by Dayna but she is aware it is taking place.

This is the trying-on period where I begin to integrate the old Dayna’s memories and experiences while also adapting to the body and helping the body adapt to me. Millions of minute adjustments are made to the body and body systems all the while a constant communication flows between myself and Dayna. She has asked to be allowed to remain conscious of these interactions and adjustments and this is part of our agreement.

The most obvious sign that I am “in the driver’s seat” of the body is that the time stream seems to hiccup for Dayna. She notices time slow down or speed up and at times it seems to do both simultaneously. She is also more aware of other dimensions and her presence in them, though she does not fully process this.

All other times we are co-piloting the body. This we practiced several times prior to May 21st in order to tweak the process and make sure the Dayna’s Ego was not going to interfere.

Initiation Proceedings: 5am Briefings

Briefings began after activations on the 21st. So far the briefing period every morning seems to flush us with memories. The extent of these memories is so great that we’ve had trouble processing them but it gets easier with time.

Yesterday, the morning briefing included a quick overview of the scope and extent of the Galactic Federation. We were shown a map of the universe and each individual star system contained within in. The map was rotated in the air over our head, almost like something from a Sci-Fi movie. We saw the Seven Sisters of which Pleiadia is a part, Sirius and the three huge stars in that system, the Vega system and Alpha Centauri. These, we were told, are the main systems from which the Starseeds on Earth originate. We were told they would be coming in waves over the next century. We were then asked to channel a message to announce when the next wave would come through. These waves include activations of Starseeds who have been inactive in bodies for some time as well as the influx of new Starseeds who will have awareness from birth.

Previous briefings have included memories of lives on other Planets, a Great Galactic War that threw this side of the Universe (Earth specifically) into a perpetual darkness, and memories of “the Plan”. Some memories were rekindled from the previous negotiation period from 2003-2007. Not all of these memories are pleasant but they are nonetheless integral to the reorganization process that is currently underway.

At this point, there is still a separation between us, a delineation between the old and the new. Ultimately, this will dissolve. Until then, posts here may seem confusing or outright unbelievable. Therefore, there will be limited posts in order to avoid undue upset in those not yet ready to accept such experiences. Sometimes there will be posts from Dayna’s perspective and other times there will be posts from mine. However, Dayna is already finding it difficult to remain fully present when she writes. As this is confusing for her I will assist her until it is no longer needed.

For those who are accepting, we thank you for your support during this time.

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OBE: Meeting Myself

For the first time in years I could not fall asleep last night. The download I received caused a trickle-down effect that had me overcome with both mental and physical energy. My entire body was alive with energy that seemed to hit me in pulses. Though not as intense as pre-OBE vibrations, they were noticeable enough to add to my restlessness. I also had tons of energy around my head, behind my head and at my crown.

Gentle Encouragement

at 1:30am I was finally fed up and threw a pillow across the room in frustration. I have session today and need sleep, so it was really bothering me that I may have to skip exploring more of my past lives. My frustration must have called my Higher Self because I heard a gentle voice remind me that I didn’t need as much sleep now and advised me to meditate. So I calmed down, propped up my pillows and attempted to meditate. However, my mind was buzzing and I could not calm so I had to do progressive muscle relaxation a couple of times.

OBE: Meeting Myself

The progressive muscle technique must have worked because the next thing I know I am inside a car looking up at a woman who is driving. I was suddenly fully aware that I was dreaming and fully aware that I was looking at myself driving. I said to myself, “You are dreaming”. She/I looked at me quizzically and kept driving, replying that she was not sure I was right. She gripped the steering wheel and I stood up and pointed to the sunroof. I began to climb up as I said, “See, watch”. I poked my head up out of the sunroof and felt the wind as it swept over my face and upper body. I could see the night sky and smell the air. Soon, the me driving, popped her head up and did the same. She laughed and closed her eyes.

Now no one was driving the car.

I turned to her and said, “You are me!” and she said, “Yes! And you are me!”. We both laughed and I found that I could take the perceptive of each Me without issue. I seemed neither more one or the other. There was a feeling of homecoming that is hard to describe and I had so much joy at this reunion that the moment will forever be locked in my memory. The cool air on my face, the brilliant night sky and my best friend, other half, Higher Self, sharing it with me.

The car continued on its own for some time and we enjoyed each others company. Then it headed off the road and toward a cliff. It went over the cliff and tumbled off into a lake far below. We both prepared to hit the dark water. I felt the water as I hit it and it seemed like I dropped forever, deeper and deeper into the abyss. I could sense the other me still in the car and disengaging later. I yelled out to her, “It will be okay. Keep swimming. Keep swimming toward the surface. We will get there!”. At this time there was a surreal feeling of the two of us becoming one with the stronger, braver of us being like a cheerleader and guide to the other part of us. Yet we were one.

I felt the panic of my other half but remained calm and continued to encourage her. My breathing was labored as I kept reminding myself that I could breathe under this water. It felt like forever as I forced myself to breathe and kept encouraging her/myself to keep swimming upward.

Finally we made it to the surface and jumped/hopped out of the water onto the bank. Here there was a moment where the me from this body was mesmerized by the other me. She was exactly like me in every detail. She told me, “Yes, we are the same. We are one.” She said other things, in fact we had an entire conversation here. I was over the moon with happiness and she was clearly pleased that this moment had occurred. There was no more fear about the walk-in information I had received.

There was a dream between this experience and the next, but I will not recount it. I was told by my HS that I needed to purge the worry and so had the dream.

OBE: Portal and Lessons

The next thing I recall is being with my HS walking down city streets. The city was seemed cartoon-ish and larger than life. There was a name for it but I don’t remember it now. It started with a “P” and sounded like Padmium.

We talked for some time about what was happening. I was shocked at how easily I transferred my consciousness into this experience. She told me I would get use to it.

At one point I wanted to fly. She told me, “We can’t do that here. We are practicing and it needs to be similar to the physical experience”. I nodded and then said, “Well, can we find a portal to somewhere else?” She said, “Yes, I know of one”.

Since we couldn’t fly, my HS created large toy cars and we got onto one and began to speed down the streets. I don’t recall the portal but somehow we ended up standing near a concrete lined waterway, talking.

My HS was now a transparent ball in my hands but was still talking to me. I practiced making the ball/me larger and succeeded, the now balloon-sized ball floated upward and sparkled with life from the inside. I experienced pure joy in this and the entire time we talking about how she, my HS, could teach me how to master skills I had. There was talk of manifestation among other things.

This OBE lasted many hours and seemed to stretch on and on. Many times I touched my sleeping body, probed it as if to satisfy my curiosity about this new experience. I shifted in and out with ease and was told this was something I would practice and that it would be used during daytime awareness as well. I was fascinated. Dream experiences during the day? It was beginning to seem possible.

At one point I met my Team and I entered a dream to do this. I was told later the names of the members who I identified as “the fat one and the thin one”. The fat one was Ron and the skinny one was Dave. I remembered Dave. I was told there would be many more meetings with them and that there were five, but I already knew that.

I then chose to end the OBE. I was worried I would not remember it all, which has proven to be true. There are so many pieces missing, so many in-depth conversations with my HS. But when I awoke I was, still am, connected in a way that I have yet to be in this life.

Conversation Afterward

My HS continued to talk to me and we practiced me staying in the in-between (easy really) because this is the ideal meeting place. She reassured me that it will be easy, this transformation, merging, walk-in. She said, “There is only one problem”. I said, “What?” She said, “You don’t want to stay”. I knew this to be true and said, “I have wanted that all my life”. We discussed this problem at some length and she explained how she could help, how we could work together to fix it.

I asked my HS her name and she said, “Athena” (Ath-in-a not the traditional pronunciation). She then gave me the rest of her name in another language that sounded German but wasn’t. It was impressive and familiar. Wow. I heard it clearly and she told me, “We will talk more”.

I fell back to sleep a few times without going OOB but am still wired with energy. I was OOB for three hours but feel completely rested. This merging process is awesome!

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Sudden Download

Today has been different from the past few weeks. Based upon what happened, I believe that my “break” or acclimation or whatever it is, is coming to an end.

Strange Symptoms

A couple of days ago, not long after I wrote my last symptom update, I had a odd sensation right behind my right ear. It was actually pretty painful and felt like I had been wearing a headband too tight for too long. I reached up to touch it and it was sensitive to the touch, too. I thought it odd and kept touching it, feeling where the sensitivity started and stopped. It was almost identical to where a headband would touch but I had not been wearing headbands for some time.

Only a few minutes later the pain had vanished and has not returned. However, a strong band of energy formed from ear to ear and around the back of my head. It comes and goes in intensity but remains today.

Then, today, as I was walking to meet a student, both of my legs began to feel weird. They felt rubbery and weak, as if I had just run a very long distance. I became worried and suddenly feared I would fall down and not be able to get up. I had a flash of what might happen, acknowledged it and it went away. Then I had a weird thought come into my mind. It was simply, “Walk in”. Not long after, the rubbery feeling vanished.

Sudden Download

For a while now I have been almost without idle thoughts throughout my day. When alone, I often zone out or think of the previous night’s dreams, but not much else. Today started out no different but after the weak, rubbery leg event I began to have that familiar feeling of time slowing down and me being in slow-motion.

For about half of the work day I had this feeling and shrugged it off thinking I must be tired. I have not had the feeling in so long I figured it was a fluke. But when I got on the highway to head home, it came on with much more intensity. I felt the familiar opening up of my crown and a sensation of being expanded beyond my body, wide-open and receiving.

It was then that many of the dreams I have been having began to link together and form a message. Added to this was songs and other thoughts that have randomly come into my mind, such as the song “Lightning Strike“, the words “walk in” and the phrase “Are you going to love me when I’m gone?” that is part of a song. I don’t recall exactly how it all fell together but I suddenly knew what was happening and felt frozen in the midst of receiving this message. I was unable to mentally process the information but a feeling of knowingness was present. A part of me was very nervous and had to be calmed a few times. I think it helped that I was not mentally analyzing what I received as it would likely only cause more nervousness.

I got stuck in a 45 minute snail paced traffic jam during this download. I doubt it was a coincidence!

I have felt urged to write everything down from the minute this download occurred.

sunriseOdd Thoughts

Now, hours later, I am able to process what was received a little better. I keep hearing the term “walk in” and, though I am somewhat familiar with the term, I had to look it up again. At first, I felt a very strong pull in my third chakra along with a nervous apprehension when I heard the term. Now I no longer have that response as I know it simply means that a part of me will step aside and let another part of me in. Thus my recent dream of giving up the reins of my horse to a much better, more experienced me.

It was explained to me, or rather I was reminded, that preparation for this next step was complete (this was the last few weeks of blah, deep sleep and lack of connection I felt). The knowingness that flooded me made me worry about my physical body and I am still not 100% certain of the meaning behind it. I had a memory of reading that sometimes when a walk-in occurs the individual becomes sick or has a sudden trauma that precipitates the final merging. I don’t know if this memory was meant to remind me of my own plans or not but it sure makes sense considering how stubborn I am and the massive fear that comes with the thought of letting go. Oddly, right at the moment I thought of this, the traffic suddenly stopped and I was forced to slam on my breaks and was hit with a huge adrenaline rush. I also began to experience a pain in my stomach akin to menstrual cramps, but I am nowhere near that time of the month.

I continued to think of the memory of what I had read and how the person is completely different afterward. I began to have thoughts of what it might be like. An entire scenario of how the new me would come in quietly and then begin to slowly reject people and situations in my life and how that might be interpreted. I felt like my husband would be discarded because he didn’t “match”. It all was very weird but what is even stranger is that I did not reject this possibility.

The fearful part of me, of course, worried I would be “gone”, but the knowing part of me understood this to be false. The old me would be absorbed and united with the other part.

The whole experience has me a bit overwhelmed with uncertainty, but I keep remembering that I am happy to have this happen. I am ready to “go”. It sounds morbid maybe, but that is the part of me that thinks of this as “death”.

I honestly don’t know how to describe my feelings right now or from the past few weeks. I don’t feel like myself, that is for sure.

Any help from the experienced is appreciated. I feel way out of my element here.

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Giving Up the Reins

I had a profound dream last night. It was one of many dreams. I feel I was on the brink of lucidity most of the evening.

Giving Up the Reins

I was at a gathering that was similar to a stock yard show or rodeo in its look and feel. I was standing near an arena that had a high, metal fence, watching people get onto their horses only to either be thrown off or successfully “tame” them. It appeared that the rider would cause their horse to go out of control purposefully. The goal was to regain control with both horse and rider safe, sound, calm and controlled.

I was aware that I was to be in this competition, too. I was standing next to this bay mare. She was spectacular and stood taller than me. She would nuzzle me occasionally and I would reach up and pet her, stroking her dark mane. I was very comfortable with her, which is unlike me both in reality and in most of my dreams. I am typically nervous around large horses.

I felt ill prepared for this competition and was discussing it with someone who I did not see but who seemed to change from male to female and then back again. We were discussing how I felt about going into the ring. I remember saying, “This is my first time. I don’t know if I can do it”. We discussed my options, one of which was to let someone else take my place.

At one point the decision became heart wrenching for some reason. I was particularly fond of my horse and did not want someone else handling her, much less taking her into the ring where she, too, had never been. It was at this point that I saw who would be taking over. She was a champion and had already successfully won several competitions. She was set to win this one, too, and had just completed her turn with top scores. She was tall, slender, and had long, flowing blonde hair. Her blue eyes sparkled and she appeared to know me and sympathize with my situation.

Emotion welled up from deep within me as I made my decision. I handed her the reins and said, “Ok. You can take over”. My whole body shook with grief at this decision as the blonde gracefully accepted the reins and prepared to mount my horse. There was a dark haired, shorter woman, standing beside the blonde who seemed disappointed. She said, “I guess I won’t be placing today”. I realized she had been set to win second place but now that the blonde was going to compete in my place, this other woman would be third.

Reflection

I awoke from this dream crying and knowing a decision had been made. I immediately recognized the horse to be me, my body and Ego, in this physical incarnation. I saw myself in this dream as the me I have always been in this life – a mixture of nature versus nurture to put it simply. It appeared to me that the goal here was to get “horse”- my Ego and body – under control in a way that I had not yet done. I was nervous, which is to be expected, and did not feel I could do it being it would be my first time. I was consulting with my guides and my Higher Self. I recognized, upon waking, that I had agreed to let my Higher Self take over. I am not sure why this was such a difficult decision. Perhaps I feel like a failure not being able to do this on my own? Or perhaps it is my affinity to my human form?

This could be my Ego reacting to this decision, but this decision feels very final. I was asked upon waking, “Are you okay with this decision?” and I immediately answered, “Yes”. The images and thoughts in my mind at this time were of me leaving behind this life and all its connections and experiences to return to the peace and rejuvenation of the Other Side. I was completely, 100%, ready to do so. I heard in response, “We will help you. It will be easy”.

I am completely calm this morning. Though I have not yet completely computed the experience in my mind, my heart knows this was a turning point.

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The End is the Beginning

Day three and I still feel wonderful. I am much more leveled out than I started, but the feeling is staying. Hallelujah!

As per my dream, I laid in savasana yesterday afternoon just because. My household was alive with noise – my children were talking loudly, my baby was crying for attention from my husband and it was quite chaotic. Yet I felt myself relax deeply and my third eye activate. Soon my crown and third eye formed the familiar energy helmet over the top of my head and I found myself fixated on a television show my daughter was watching in the other room. I listened intently. Focused.

Then a heavy blanket of energy seemed to descend over my entire body and my eyes immediately began to twitch back and form. REM. I instantly recognized the symptoms of trance and was blown away. Wow!

Vibrating

I have heard of others experiencing kundalni energy say they have an almost constant vibratory energy all over their body. I had never experienced so it was quite alien to me. I thought maybe it was the psychic chills I frequently get from my guides. But no, they said this is quite different from psychic chills.

Yesterday mine started, and they are still with me. They are subtle but I can tune into them and make them stronger if I want. At one point yesterday my entire body felt so alive, so full of energy that I was a bit blown away. There I was, standing in my kitchen, covered in vibrations! All I did was pause for a moment to take in my surroundings, something I have been doing quite often these last few days. I do this to increase my awareness of the present moment. Well, it is working and it seems to have initiated the all-over body vibrations!

Since then I have but to change my focus and I notice the vibrations. If I don’t put attention there then they are quite inconspicuous. I can feel them everywhere – not just in my chakras. I even felt them in my feet! hehe

Dream: Gospel Songfamaviol-1

This morning I awoke in tears from a dream I was having. In it, I was in a group of people at a type of ceremony honoring someone’s accomplishments. I had chosen a rare gospel song to play that was from the 1940s. I don’t remember the song’s melody now, but there was a part in which the lyrics addressed generations and how daughters and sons later became husbands and wives, mothers and fathers and then grandmothers and grandfathers. I cried hearing this, full of such an overwhelming love for humanity.

Upon waking in tears, my guide was close and calming. I was also covered in several energy blankets. One was around my midsection, one was around my head, and another was around my legs. In addition, my entire body was lightly vibrating.

I said immediately to my guide, “I chose a very challenging personality this life”. He said, “Indeed you did”.

I knew without knowing how that the life I lived two lives before this one was much more in line with my true Self. My personality (Ego) in that life was not resistant like it is in this life. It was easier to control and much more pliable. I had such faith in that life, such patience and understanding. Yes, the life was hard, but I had faith and held onto that faith throughout.

I was also a black woman living in the South during that lifetime. I have such a deep love and respect for black women in this life. They are truly the most beautiful of women to me. I didn’t recognize where that came from until I remembered that lifetime. Such faithful, passionate, supportive, wonderful, amazing family I had in that lifetime. They taught me the true meaning of family.

Anyway, I digress. That life I chose a personality that was easier to control. I knew that in this life I chose a very resistant, stubborn, overly emotional personality on purpose. I also knew that it could also be controlled and I was learning to do that now.

Energetic Transfer (AKA Energy Swap)

If you have been reading my posts you may have read one entitled Energy Swap. In it I was told this would be happening to me. I didn’t quite understand it but, as with all the messages I receive, I put it “on the shelf” and left it for later.

Upon feeling the energy blankets, I kept waiting for the energy bolt I have had in the past, but it never came. My guide said to me, “You don’t need that anymore”.

I drifted into the in-between during this time, enjoying the calming energy. While there, I was told some things by my guide about the merging process. I can’t remember everything now (I forgot it almost instantly) but I do remember he said, “You will listen more and more”. The rest of what I was told had to do with the exchange of energy that was on-going.

When I returned to myself I said to him, “I am coming into myself”. I said it with such certainty and knowingness. Now I understand more fully what it means.

The “swap” of energy is not that I am giving up energy, it is more like I am being rewired. The energy that is coming in, or “downloaded”, is more of me. As it comes in, it redirects and channels the existing energy and “flushes” the system. In doing this, a new, more efficient system is created. So, in a nutshell, I am regaining control of the human system and personality and ultimately it will result in a well-controlled Ego.

The End is the Beginning

I am already seeing the changes within myself. The biggest is the calm that overrides any ineffective, over-reactive emotion. I am more able to sit and do nothing and think nothing. I am more able to be in the present moment. I can distance myself from other people’s dramas. I am cause more than I am effect. I control my emotions. I control my reactions. I control my words. I control my thoughts.

The me and the Me are switching places.

Examples:

My husband used my apple cider vinegar to dye Easter eggs. I thought, “This makes me angry”. Then there was a counter-thought, “It is done. There is no need to be angry.” Then I thought, “I am not angry”. The idea of the emotion was created with the initial thought but was squelched before it manifested.

All day yesterday my husband was at work. He had the day off but chose to go in. I called him twice, asking when he would be home. He was happy and motivated. I had the thought to yell at him, reprimand him for not being home with family. That thought was squelched immediately by the “calm” which came in and overrode my intention to say something. Instead, I listened to him and let him be happy. There was no counter-thought this time, just the calmness. It pervaded my being.

There are tons more examples. These are just recent. Overall, I find these scenarios more and more common. My typical reactions to minor issues are lessening. The Ego-me no longer has free-reign. Auto-pilot has been turned off.