Tag Archives: Astral Travel

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Long OBE This Morning

I asked and received. 🙂 

Woke around 5:30am and asked to go out of body. I couldn’t sleep, though, because I was thinking of an issue I discovered with my service record from a school I worked at in 2014-2015. They sent only part of it and I sent them an email requesting they look for the rest. My pay is determined by my service record and the years I worked. I worried the school may have recorded it wrong and I would have to prove I worked there and so I was considering looking for my W-2’s from that year. However, they are in a filing cabinet at my ex’s and he has said I can’t go inside the house when he isn’t there. So I was thinking of ways to bypass that to get to the filing cabinet when this OBE began.

I must have fallen into a dream without knowing it. My sons and I were going to my ex’s house. I don’t remember traveling there, though. Instead, I remember laying in my bed and seeing this as if imagining it. I noticed my vision was not turned on at this time and remembered something I told my son yesterday about how I use to look at pictures or paintings in OBE and then go into them and transport into a new world. With this thought a bubble of light with an image inside formed in front of my eyes. Through it I could see clear as day while around the bubble where I was currently at was like I was in my mind (no color, 2D). I peered into the bubble scene and the scene expanded quickly as if stretchy. My mind could push at the edges and feel the elasticity of it and push it outward. I watched through the bubble rather than going into it but the bubble expanded to the point that I was inside of it just on the edge.

The scene inside was of a beautiful, cloudless, sunny day at a pool. A young teen girl was walking by and glanced in my direction. I felt as if I was in the pool on an innertube and could feel the water gently lapping at the edges. I asked the girl, “Who are you? Do I know you?” She looked my way and her face was quizzical as if my question made no sense to her. I asked again but got no answer. I recall being fascinated at the clarity of the scene. I could see the boards of the deck, the pool items like towels and snorkels, masks, the trees in the background brilliantly green, and the blue sky seeming to stretch forever. I stayed there watching in wonder until I heard my son call to me about the files he had gotten for me out of the filing cabinet. I could see the files in my mind and they were not the correct ones.

My attention went to the grayish, 2D area of my mind were I found myself suddenly falling into water. I saw my phone fly up into the air and fall into the water. I had no body or form yet I panicked as if I did, flailing about for my phone which, unusually, was floating in the water. I grabbed it and let my son know we needed to get inside to dry it off. 

With that thought I was transported inside my ex’s bedroom but the layout was backwards. I recall the ceiling fan above the most vividly. I still had no form and with my mind I flew around the house. As I did, I observed how I felt and how the space felt. I had no emotional attachment whatsoever and did not feel comfortable because I was in someone else’s space, a space I knew I shouldn’t be in. I went to the filing cabinet but didn’t stay there. I settled somewhere downstairs and ended up on a bed. I don’t recall all my thoughts but I think I was sorting through the past – places, events, people. 

Suddenly, I hear a woman’s voice. She is looking for her son and she pops her head into the bedroom. I try to hide because I am not suppose to be in the house, but she doesn’t seem to care. My vision is no longer 2D but vivid 3D again and I recognize I am in my old bedroom at my mom’s house. Not caring how I got there, I listen to the woman say thank you to my mom for watching her son. The woman has blonde hair and is about my age and I hear her go into the other room and retrieve her son. I know now that I was witnessing a memory of a very long time ago when my mom must have watched a young boy who use to come and play with us. His mom was in school to be a nurse and having a difficult time so my grandmother let her live there for free and provided free childcare. My siblings and I use to play with him.

I left the bedroom and walked into the kitchen. I felt solid but I don’t think I had a form. A man came in. He was tall and dressed in a coat and was wearing work boots. I greeted him by name, “Hi (insert name)!” He looked at me and asked, “Why did you bring me here?” I saw a man I knew was his son behind him, though he was out of focus. I don’t remember answering him but I felt super excited that he was there with me. I looked behind me through the double glass doors at a man walking up to the door. I said, “Look, the neighbor (insert name I don’t recall) is here, too! But oh there is a big bear following him!” I saw a large, black bear walking behind the man but instead of causing any harm, the bear was gentle and joined the man alongside some dogs when the man turned around to pet the bear. 

When I turned back around everyone was gone and the kitchen lights had gone low and my vision returned to grayish 2D.

I decided to fly out the door after a bit because it was no fun inside a grayish, uninhabited box of a house. 

Outside my vision stayed grayish and limited. I was flying (still no body) and feeling the ground as I flew along, noting the bumps and valleys and not really knowing what they were. Then I was was pulled upward at lightening speed and as I was, I was telling myself, “I’m not afraid” or something like that and purposefully focused on regaining my sight, which came on with full vibrance instantly. It distinctly felt as if brilliant light was burning a hole through my eyelids. It didn’t hurt and was familiar. I had felt it recently during a healing OBE in my bedroom when I was still living at the family home. It feels like a jolt of energy to my eye area that seems to force “open” my eyes but with the distinct sensation of my eyes remaining closed. Imagine light so bright it shoots out of the eyes like laser beams.

The scene I saw was dreary. The sky was gray and the wind was howling and blowing as if there was a storm but there was no rain. I could see bare limbed treetops that appeared dead. My vision was 360 degrees all around and it felt as if my energy body, which I distinctly felt was still a sphere, was spinning wildly. I didn’t like what I was seeing and said aloud, “I want to see something else” while envisioning the opposite of the dreary oppressed scene I was seeing. Instantly the scene was filled with light, the “wind” died down and I could see a space inundated with light and a kind of fog that didn’t have shape or form. I only call it fog because I don’t know what else to call it. It was like I had on glasses that were fogged and so lessened the brilliance of the light. I felt myself transported once again and tried with all my might to maintain my vision but slowly lost it.

I felt myself come to rest on a solid surface. Before I had a chance to get my bearings I heard my son and also saw him from above as he approached me. I could see myself laying on the concrete by the side of the pool. I had on a coat but wore nothing from the waist down and my bare butt was showing. My son said, “We need to go now….” He paused after seeing my state and said, “Never mind. Keep doing whatever your doing…”. While this happened I was also experiencing myself in a body by the pool. I could feel the cold concrete below me and I felt my energy beginning to destabilize. I began to cry. I experienced many emotions but it was the realization that I had to go back that upset me the most. I didn’t want to. 

I slowly came back to my body. I could’ve returned to astral but opted not to. 

When I woke I thought/heard, “It doesn’t matter”. This was regarding my concern about the service record but also most of the things that go through my mind in waking reality. I asked, “Why am I here then?” I heard back, “To observe.” There was more with the answer, like a flood of Knowing that cannot be put into words.

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Long OBE

Wow, what a night! I had a 3 hour OBE, something that hasn’t happened to me in years. 

I woke up at 3am crying from a dream. The dream was of similar themes to dreams I’ve had in the past. I was all dressed up in formal wear with a group of people I know from my life currently (ex, his family mostly). The event reminded me of prom. We entered what reminded me of my old high school except it was a bit different with a metal detector type thing we had to walk through and iris scans of the eyes (lol). I was in a super good mood and very talkative. I noticed they were not interested in what I was saying, some of them looking annoyed. We all mingled together waiting for the other guests to arrive. I mentioned something I was considering. I said I wanted to get a personalize license plate that read “EWW PPL”. LOL – I had been talking about this the day before with my kids. Everyone looked at me like they were completely bored and disinterested, some annoyed. Finally, my ex-BIL laughed half-assed to try and make me feel better. No one joined him and he stopped as he felt their critical eyes on him. 

Feeling very unwanted, I excused myself to the bathroom. I sat on the toilet and cried while thinking of all the similar times the exact scenario played out in my life with boyfriends, partners, friends and family. I am good one-on-one with them but as soon as I am in a group they are embarrassed by me and later say, “Why did you have to say that?” or “Why do you embarrass me like that?” or other similar comments. They are happy to be my friend/partner when we are one-on-one but when in groups I become an issue for them.

I got off the toilet and there was a big turd in it (LOL – symbolic of relieving myself of a burden) and as I flushed it I struggled to pull up my hose. I wiped my tears with TP and as I tossed it I saw more crap in the trashcan (I noted its meaning in the dream). As I turned around the bathroom door was gone and a man was standing there looking at me. I was still pulling up my hose but didn’t care if he saw. He asked me, “Are you okay? Why are you so quiet?”  I woke up, tears still in my eyes.

The dream is a reflection of my life for sure as is the last part where the guy was suddenly concerned about why I was so quiet. If I am talkative and attempt to blend in with the group, I am embarrassing and get scolded. If I am quiet then everyone is suddenly worried about me. I can’t win!

I couldn’t go back to sleep at first. I remembered a boyfriend I had years ago who was the exception to the above scenario. I felt bad for the way things ended with us. He was the only one out of so many boyfriends and friends who validated who I was and valued my contributions.

OBE

I asked to go OOB but didn’t think it would happen. I lingered in the in-between for a while thinking of the dream. Suddenly, I felt vibrations and was like, “OMG, vibrations!” (haven’t felt them in a while). I got too excited and lost them but rolled over and was OOB that easily.

I was in my grandparent’s old underground house. It looked like it did when I was young. On the sofa were my two boys. I went over and tapped one on the head. We interacted a bit but I can’t recall what we did. I remember how bright the kitchen was and noted the old gold linoleum, cabinets and countertops. I headed for the door and went out, flying up and hovering over the driveway which was dirt and not paved like it is now. I felt an unseen force begin to pull me backwards and I blacked out a bit. I decided to start singing and regained my vision. I was singing, “Amazing Grace” but sang it with different notes. I flew up over the barn and other parts of the farm. It was dark with a clear sky of stars.

At some point I returned to my body but immediately exited again. I found myself back in the house but this time it was a bedroom and bathroom. It looked like my mom’s room. It was a complete mess and I realized it was a reflection of her inner self. I began to pick up dirty clothes in an attempt to help/heal her. I took a pile to the laundry shute but it was different than real like, opening like a drawer. I put the pile in and it spilled out, old panty liners piled on top. I remember being surprised by the panty liners, they were all clean. The bathtub was next and was full of old, stagnant water. I attempted to drain it but it was clogged. I tried to stop the dripping but it was stuck. The tub was also round and yellowing from old age, not at all like reality.

I came back to my body briefly and then exited straight away. This time I was back in the living room of the old house. A young boy ran past and my boys yelled at him. I followed and found him in the bathroom. I said something to him and he gave me his shoes, the soles were coming off. I told him to get some glue sticks from the kitchen, which he did. I glued them on. He was a little black boy.

I went outside again and flew up into the air. I asked for clarity and assistance and felt the force again but it only turned me around. So I flew around some more enjoying the brisk night air and freedom of flight. I recall asking to see the galaxies above but when I tried to go higher I was stopped.

Again, I briefly returned to my body and then went out again. This time my mom was there. I mentioned her dirty room and how I tried to clean it. I explained that she should be concerned as it is a reflection of her spiritual state. Her response was that she no longer cared if things were messy. I understood. I told her I would help but she didn’t seem interested in changing anything. 

After this I decided to wake up. I felt rested and comfortable when I came to my body. No issues whatsoever with shifting back like irregular heart beat or an off feeling like I sometimes get. 

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Lucid Dream: Australia

It’s been a while. I apologize for the long pause but I have not felt inclined to write lately. I am writing today only because, after longer than I can remember, I had a lucid dream. 🙂

Lucid Dream: Australia

I found myself walking along a dirt path in a rural setting. The sky was blue and dotted with white, fluffy clouds. There were stubby trees here and there, tall grasses and large rocks dotting the landscape. Somehow I knew I was in Australia and I remember thinking, “I haven’t been here in a long time.”

I remember having a conversation with someone in my mind about the government giving away land to people in order to get the area settled. They were telling me about a program to help educate newcomers to the customs and traditions of the land as well as to teach them skills so they could make a living off the land (farming, ranching, permaculture, etc.). I remember my only interest was residing there and taking in nature.

I walked down the dirt path towards a metal stake embedded in the rocky soil. Near it were some large, white rocks similar to the limestone rocks of central Texas (when I visited Aussie in real life I thought it resembled Texas). I leaned down and grabbed one of the rocks to turn it over and moved it outside of the property boundary. It was heavy and I could feel the rough surface of the rock under my fingers. There was momentary worry that I would disturb a snake or large insect that had made its home under the rock, but to my relief there was nothing underneath it. I located another rock and did the same, relocating it to the other side of the boundary.

When I was done, I noted that the area was clear of rocks and saw the corner was well defined. I turned around to walk back up the path and spotted a wooden stake, broken in half, with an orange flag on it. I went to retrieve it when I heard someone remind me that the natives didn’t like the newcomers. I assumed one must have stolen the stake and broken it, tossing it far away from the property boundary. Taking the stake in my hand, I put it next to the metal stake where it belonged.

Again, I turned to walk back up the dirt path. This is when I paused to look around and take in the scenery. It was beautiful! I thought to myself how real everything was. I had an inkling that I was dreaming so I leaned down and felt the soil of the dirt path. It was warm to the touch with a gritty texture. I picked some up, letting the particles of soil fall between my fingers while focusing on the feel it it. Yep, it felt like soil. I wondered if it would also smell like soil, so I took a handful of soil and brought it up to my nose. The smell was earthy with hints of other smells. I smiled and let the soil fall through my fingertips to the ground. Again, I looked around, noting the trees, sky and path I was walking. How amazing! Strangely, I did not continue for long in that lucid state but stood a moment in awe as realization hit me that I had a choice to stay or go. For some odd reason I chose to leave, slowly returning to my sleeping physical body.

When I woke I was surprised and pleased I had a lucid dream. It has been a long time! I wondered why Australia and then recalled that just yesterday I had been talking about my visit there. I guess a part of me wanted to return and so did. 🙂

Walk-In

Another thing that happened in the night was a brief waking almost immediately after having fallen asleep. I remember getting reminded, out of the blue, of my past and how I was a “walk-in”. I called bullshit, saying I didn’t believe in that but was asked to Remember, meaning to feel within myself what was truth. After a pause, I acknowledged my past experiences were real. However, I still felt that all of it seems very unreal in my present state.

I am certain this short reminder came as a result of something I had told someone about my past and how I am going through a major stage of disillusionment. When I think of my all my past spiritual experiences they feel to have all been for nothing; pointless.

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OBE: Go Back

I continue to have difficulty getting to sleep. Flare activity was high most of the day yesterday, so that is a likely contributor.

I woke around 5am and couldn’t return to sleep until about 6am. I fell into a short dream where I was observing a woman picking up a prescription. Something about the dream brought on lucidity and I shifted OOB.

I had a string of OBE’s after that with each OBE becoming more and more clear as I progressed. My bedroom also changed with each exit. My bed moved from one side of the room to the other with the window remaining in the center.

My vision was off or limited in the first few OBEs and my energy felt shifty and unbalanced. When I would try and leave my bed I felt heavy with blankets or clothing and had to convince myself that I was free of it in order to move away. My vision was off and on. When I could see, it was brief and everything was dark and covered with shadows. In those OBES my attempts to leave my house was unsuccessful. I would reach the front door to my house and return to my body before I could exit. I could make it down the stairs to the front entry but that is it. In one instance my entire front living area was filled with gym equipment and I had to maneuver around it to get to the door.

With each return to my body my lucidity would increase. Eventually, I realized leaving my house via the front was pointless. For some reason that exit was blocked. So, I decided to try my bedroom window. This proved successful and with my first attempt I was able to exit despite several layers of window screens barring my path. The window itself would open and a screen would appear. I would push it aside and another would take its place and then another until finally I decided to mentally remove all barriers. I can’t recall my exact thought but it was something like, “The window is open.”

This is when my OBEs began to become more solid and the experience more realistic. I was able to raise my vibration by singing and sang throughout the rest of my experiences. I can’t recall what I was singing but the few bits and pieces I caught indicated I was encouraging and guiding myself.

My first ventures out my window were short but a pattern emerged after a few successful excursions beyond the limits of my constructed house reality. The seasons changed but the place I visited appeared to remain the same. I am not sure where exactly I was but it was a city, one that was very familiar. In fact, in the few OBEs I’ve had over the course of the last year, this was the city I ended up in whenever I was able to leave my house.

The area near the city resembles a lazy, New England suburb and the city itself feels well established. It had a very downtown feel to it but a downtown that has been updated and modernized. There are lamp posts positioned all along the roads similar to what lines the San Antonio River Walk. Some of the streets are paved with bricks and the sidewalks also have this feature but only at junctures and intersections. The shops are quaint, many with awnings and apartments above. The overall feeling is of a small town but it is anything but that.

With each exit through my window the season changed. Sometimes it was dark and other times it was light outside. Sometimes there was foliage on the trees and other times they were bare.

At one point, I was able to venture far enough away to enter the city itself. I felt myself being pulled upward but I experienced it as if I was learning to control my astral body. It felt very much like I was flying an aircraft, making slight adjustments here and there to remain steady.

Ahead of me I saw lights strung around an outdoor dining area surrounded by thigh-high, red brick walls. The tables were full of people enjoying their meals. When I saw it I immediately wanted to investigate. My main goal was to interact with the people. Maybe I could talk to someone and find out where I was?

I spotted a table. Three people were seated and having dinner. I quickly flew in, landed and approached them only to have one of the men at the table give me a disapproving look. His energy said, “Get out of here. We don’t want you here.” I remember thinking I must have broken a rule. Maybe I wasn’t suppose to be flying? Regardless, the energy of my concern sent me straight back to my body where I quickly recovered and went OOB again.

By this time going OOB felt no different than being awake in the physical. My last exit was so clear and crisp that I had to remind myself I was in the astral.

OBE: Go Back

I flew out my bedroom window and into the tree tops. There were branches in my way, so I pushed them aside. The air was crisp and below me I could see there was snow on the ground. It was still dark out but the area was well illuminated by the city lights.

I flew along without having to fight a pull upwards. It seemed I had mastered flying my astral vehicle. I didn’t notice this, however, as I was reminding myself that I was asleep and OOB. I remember thinking, “Someone pinch me”, because everything was so spectacularly real! I couldn’t believe I had succeeded and was back exploring the astral! I hadn’t had this much lucidity and clarity in so, so long!

I flew through the city. What I recall most is the crispness of the scene. How the darkness was perfectly balanced with the sparkling, city lights. The buildings appeared solid and I could make out the tiniest of details. I took it all in and couldn’t wait to explore.

Suddenly, I heard a masculine voice call out to me from my left. He said, “[Go] back”. I stopped and turned toward the voice in surprise and saw a man floating next to me. He was facing the direction from which I just flew and I knew instantly he was not a dream character but an actual, astral traveler like me. I could see his entire body from head to toe floating there. He had blonde hair and a square jaw like a football player. He was wearing light colored blue jeans, a t-shirt and tennis shoes. He looked to be between the ages of 16-24, likely college aged or close.

Honestly, I didn’t know what to do. I was so surprised to see and hear him so clearly that I froze on the spot and adrenaline poured through me. I tried to stop my reaction because I knew it would pull me back into my body, but I couldn’t control it. I remember thinking, “What did he say? What is he doing here? Who is he?” and more. Not only did I not expect him to be there but seeing him there, floating mid-air, is not something I recall ever seeing while OOB. Why I never have, I don’t know, but seeing him there like that shocked me. The amount of adrenaline I felt is similar to what I’ve felt after narrowly avoiding a car accident. I suspect my reaction was in part due to the fact that everything felt so real and I momentarily believed I was in my physical body walking rather than flying. So seeing him mid-air was unexpected.

When I came back to my body I was worried the man I saw knew where I lived. lol That is how disoriented I was. I quickly recovered but couldn’t return to sleep. It was 6:30am, so I had only been OOB for 30 minutes. It felt like hours!

Considerations

Though the above OBEs are not near as cool as some of my previous ones, I feel like major progress was made. I broke through a self-imposed barrier, one that has been firmly in place for quite a while. That barrier appears in my OBEs as blocked exits. I am not able to get outside and if I do, I usually can’t venture far.

I also recognized that the feeling of being pulled upward, which feels to be controlled by something or someone else, is totally and completely under my control. What is odd is, how I did I get into such a position to believe that to begin with? In my early OBEs I never believed someone else to be controlling where I went, not really. And if I did the control was mutual. I always knew that “other” was me, my HS. Yet here I was learning to fly my astral body all over again. Something I learned to do way back in 2004!

And then, seeing a fellow astral traveler like that and it being the first time I recall such a thing (full-body and in flight), well that is just bizarre! Sure, I’ve seen other travelers but they always felt to be my own creations; part of my constructed reality. This guy was most definitely not! How do I know? I don’t know. I just instantly knew. And the reason he surprised me so much, besides that he was floating there like that, was I assumed the reality I found myself in was one of my constructed ones. How then could someone else be there? Unless….I invited him.

Then, there is what the man said to me. Was he asking me to “go back” to my house? Or just back in the other direction? Or back to my body? I wish I had not reacted like I had. I wish I could’ve talked to him, found out who he was, where we were, etc. Sigh.

On a positive, when I came back to my body it was seamless. No heart flutters or pounding heart. No irregular energy or jagged vibrations. It was an easy, comfortable, settling into my body and return to physical reality.

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Halloween Lucid to OBE: Numb

Happy Halloween and full moon! Seems that lately the only way I go OOB is when there is a full moon.

Lucid to OBE: Numb

I woke at 5:30am wide awake. I didn’t want to get up so I attempted to return to sleep, but found it difficult.

The next thing I remember is talking to someone in the in-between. I assume is was a male guide. I can’t recall what we were talking about. I believe we were discussing issues I am having in life.

I became lucid when I felt arms wrap around me from behind. I replied, “That’s wonderful. You did it.” With this I am acutely aware of where I am and all my perceptions turn on. As I talk to this man who has now appeared behind me I survey the scene. I am laying on a sofa in a very nice home with vaulted ceilings and mahogany trim. To my left is a modern kitchen and to my right is a staircase leading to the upper floor.

The man is snuggling up behind me on the sofa talking. He is mostly excited that he was able to be there with me saying things like, “I can’t believe it. I did it!” When I turned to look at him I didn’t recognize him. He was quite nerdy looking but not ugly, just unique. The thoughts I had about his appearance were ignored because he felt so very familiar to me his. His energy said I could trust him and that he was a close, beloved friend.

I remember attempting to kiss and cuddle him but he would freak out, worried he would ruin the experience (go back to his body). I understood his concerns as they were valid. He encouraged me to give him a sensual massage. I traced my hand down the back of his thigh down to his calf. When I was done I tried to hugged him close and he again resisted, fear in his eyes. The whole thing was so very real that for a moment I forgot I was dreaming.

We talked quite a bit but what I remember most is thinking of the time and how it was almost 11am. I felt guilty for sleeping in so long and wasting the day. It felt like I needed to get up and get my day going but I don’t recall having anything in particular to do.

Then, I could sense that our time together was coming to an end. I looked at him, studying his face as I explained I could feel he would be leaving soon. His appearance was still very strange to me. He had light hair and a very pronounced mouth area with deep smile lines, almost like his face was carved. Again I dismissed my judgements and just enjoyed the time I had with him.

Not long after he was just gone and I felt myself shifting back to my body. I pulled myself back to the scene, got up from the sofa and walked into the kitchen.

What I first noticed was that someone had left food out from breakfast – 3 open jars of jam (feeling stuck in a situation) with lids scattered about. I grabbed the lids to put them back on the jars but I thought I heard someone talking. I listened hard and heard it again. I said, “Is someone there?” I noticed a tiny radio (awareness needed) on the counter but it was not turned on.

Rather than clean up, I just left the mess there.

My thought at the time was that I needed to write down what I had just experienced. So I headed upstairs to find my laptop.

As I climbed the stairs I got a strange feeling. It was like I was dying or like all my energy was being sucked out of me. I couldn’t feel my body, my legs, nothing.

I barely made it to the top and when I did I looked toward the bedroom on the left which I knew I shared with my husband, but I didn’t want to be in a shared space. So I headed toward my bedroom at the end of the hallway. I stopped, though, when I saw a visual in my mind of the bed in that room covered in books, papers and other materials. I knew my husband had taken over my space.

In that moment I fell to my knees, all my energy gone. The feeling is hard to describe but it was as if I were about to pass out and die. I began to try and crawl toward the bedroom but my thoughts took over and I collapsed. I looked around at the amazing house I was in. So grand! It was familiar. I knew it. Yet something was very wrong. I was thinking how the house must be haunted, either that or I must be going insane. I am losing my mind I thought. At the time the memory of where I was seemed overlaid with memory of my current lifetime. I felt to be torn between the two. Who was I? Where was I? Why did I feel so confused?

Then I felt to be dematerializing back to my sleeping body. When I woke a song was going through my head:

I’ve become so numb, I can’t feel you there
Become so tired, so much more aware
I’m becoming this, all I want to do
Is be more like me and be less like you

Considerations

My best guess is that I somehow shifted into another reality, one where I had a different life and remembered that life to some degree. The problem was that my current life seeped into my memory of the other one and so created disruptions that I perceived and knew were wrong in some way.

Or it could have been that my problems in my current life seeped into my OBE in order to show themselves. My husband had completely taken over my bedroom – my private space, the space where I could be myself without hiding or pretending. The feeling that I had no space of my own was prominent as was the feeling of being completely exhausted and near energetic death. Mentally I was unable to make sense of anything because of my depleted state.

As I write this, I am reminded of something. I drew one of my Light Code Oracle cards last week. It was the Grief card, reversed. This is the card’s message:

Failure and loss bring strength that can move mountains. Reversed – New hope. An end to a period of grief is approaching or has already begun. Your tears are drying or have long dried up. Your view of the world is becoming lighter with every passing day. Possibility abounds. Complementary cards – Rebirth, Remembering, Death.

I knew today would mark the beginning of a period of understanding. The fog is lifting.

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OBE: Silent Night

I got an unexpected OBE this morning. It was short but followed by some interesting messages.

Dream: Teaching Assignment

The dream takes place in a non-traditional school environment. I am working there and talking to the principal and other teachers about the end of the school year which is fast approaching. This is a self-paced school and the students are expected to reach their goals in a timely fashion but are not forced to adhere to specific syllabus or itinerary.

At first we are talking about an email virus (interference in communication) that has been infecting our work computers. I see the email containing the virus in my inbox. It seems to replicate and I hurry to delete it.

Then the principal asks me if I think all my students will be done by the end of the school year. I say “no”. The principal asks how much time I think they need and I say, “Another four weeks, at least until the July break (4th of July).” A co-worker acts surprised and I mention how I will take my summer break then. She looks even more surprised and I ask, “Don’t you have a summer break here?” I am told school is year-long.

Next, I remember pacing back and forth in front of my mother’s house talking to someone about how my current employment as a teacher is in my favor. It can help me find another job, one where there is a summer break (need for a break). It feels like I am trying to convince myself that everything will be okay because I have a Plan B.

Then I am watching as the children head down a steep set of stairs (levels of consciousness) to go home or to lunch. A group of hillbilly looking people drive up. They have a trailer attached to their truck. It is filled with all sorts of birds – chickens and turkeys (cowardice) mainly. The principal says the group is a family who he is trying to nudge away from his school. It feels like they are a nuisance. We begin to usher the kids back up the stairs but it is very steep and the top step very high. I have to help a little girl (aspect of myself) who I think of as my daughter because she is so little and the step so tall. She makes it with my help and we stand on the balcony watching the hillbilly family below.

The principal makes a deal with the family who offers to use his turkeys and chickens as a petting zoo for the kids. He warns us to not let the children get too close or they might get pecked.

OBE: Silent Night

I am aware of lying in my bed and hear a familiar clapping beat to my left. I say familiar because I heard it yesterday morning. The clapping goes along with drums but I don’t hear the drums, I feel them. I am following along, trying to learn the rhythm. Yesterday morning I was actually saying the rhythm while clapping, “Da, daa, da-da, da, da…” As my mom, a music teacher for 30+ years, would have said it, “Ta, ta-i, ti-ti, ta ta.”

Unlike yesterday, this morning I recognize that these are a type of “noises off” except that focusing on them doesn’t keep me from going OOB, they assist me. As I decide to shift OOB I feel heavy blankets (security, protection) over my head and shoulders. I will them away, clapping my hands harder and singing the rhythm louder. In my memory I see the music I am making move the blankets off of me and I feel lighter as they fall away.

Out of bed and OOB, I head toward my bedroom door and easily pass through it. It acts like a portal and I find myself floating down, down, down towards a school setting with wood flooring and toys scattered about. I set my eyes on something, a toy of some sort, but I can’t recall what it was now, and head toward it, curious and feeling somewhat out of character for myself while in my astral form. Something catches my eye from behind me and I turn to see a man standing, hands casually clasped behind his back. He feels like a teacher and is dressed very casually in a blue polo shirt and jeans. He is looking at me and sending me a telepathic message for me to come over, so I do.

On the floor at his feet is a fluffy teddy bear (trust, security, companionship) with a large object in its hands. I want to say it is a megaphone (need to hear something) but it is hard to say. It is definitely shaped like one and is red in color. I lean in and snuggle the bear and the man says, “He is saying something. Listen.” He again says this telepathically so there are no words but rather it is like a hum or energy inside me that urges me to pay attention to the tiny bear.

I put my ear up to the bear’s mouth and listen. I don’t hear anything so I listen harder, stilling myself in order to catch even the faintest of sounds. I hear a small voice, very faint and it is singing a song. I listen and catch the bear’s words and know he is singing a lullaby. He sings, “Silent night….” but in the tune of the familiar ABC Song.

Caught off guard by the message I am receiving and not understanding I look up to question the man but don’t remember if he is there. I decide to explore the area more but am stopped by the familiar sensations of shifting back into my body.

In-Between

I shift back into my body which feels very heavy with energy focused in my mid-section. I receive visions and communication from the same man from my OBE for some time after. In these visions he is next to me. I am seated in a captain’s type wooden chair with a tall back that reaches shoulder height. The man pulls up another chair but does not sit in it. The feeling is the chair is meant for a visitor but that visitor is not the man. Am I waiting for someone? I feel the answer is yes.

The man tells me something but his exact words are lost to me despite my repeating them over and over in order to recall them. The meaning remains and it is that they (my Team I guess) will assist me with a type of re-integration and healing. I am frustrated to not recall the word he used because it made so much sense to me in the moment! Yet now I have no clue other than a feeling that lingers and suggests a “piece” being re-placed via a type of “lesson” that is forthcoming.

I remember seeing the edge of a pool, its waters crystal blue, calm and clear. I hear the man say, “See” and I know he is indicating the waters are related to my spiritual state, not just a “clearing” or healing. When I visit waters like this in my dreams and OBEs I find them delightful, calming and peaceful with a sense of freedom and fluidity that is hard to describe.

I am reminded of a message I woke to yesterday morning. Someone was whispering to me, “En Fuego.” All day I thought, “I should look that up just to be sure of it’s meaning” but I never did. I already new it meant, “On Fire” and was likely a message relating to the Kundalini “fire”. Later that day I was driving home from the store and heard a duet on the radio. The song stirred something in me and I remember how music and singing light up my soul. I began to fall into the song, seeing the voices as the masculine and the feminine energies within me. They danced together as the two voices in the song harmonized and I felt it within myself. It was beautiful but sadly it was interrupted by a phone call. 😦

In reflecting on the water symbolism along with this message of being “on fire” I can’t help but think of the elements and astrology. I am Leo – a fire sign. Water signs are strangely attractive to me, likely because they are my opposite. I can’t help but wonder if I am being asked to immerse myself in the opposite “element” to create a catalytic effect. Perhaps that empty chair holds the answer?

 

 

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OBE and Message: Go to Florida

After hearing my husband brag about an OBE he had two nights ago, I went to bed last night feeling a bit jealous. I have been sleeping really deeply lately so my dreams are often lost upon waking. The tiredness keeps me from lucid dreams and OBEs so when I wake I feel like I’m missing out. So I said to my guidance, “I would really like something interesting to happen tonight.”

Something woke me up around 2am. I have no clue what but I ended up going downstairs to get a drink and was wide awake by the time I got back in bed. Seeing the perfect opportunity to try WBTB (wake back to bed), I began to repeat in my mind, “I am now out of body” over and over. To be honest, I have never tried the repeat method but heard an online friend of mine has success with it so I figured, why not?

As I was repeating “I am now out of body” one of my guides reminded me to set an intention for my projection. I thought about it and told him I wanted to be shown what I need to see (one of my favorite intentions) and when I can go Home (lol) because I have been so, so bored lately.

OBE

I don’t know when I shifted because I can’t recall feeling any vibrations. What I recall next is sitting in my bed as the body of a warm cat pushed itself against my hands. The cat was purring and I could see it was brown tabby. I remember thinking, “I don’t own a cat….” and then realizing I was OOB and could take over the experience. I chose not to take control, though, instead allowing the experience to show me what I had asked to be shown.

As I petted the cat (female sexuality, femininity), I heard music in my mind and sang along to the familiar song while also recognizing it was a message from my guides or Higher Self in response to my request to be allowed to cut this life short out of “boredom”. I wish I could remember the song now but all I can recall is that it was something like, “Why give up now when you’ve come so far?” Knowing it was a message I needed to remember, I grabbed a pencil and began to write it down on a piece of paper.

Then I noticed that the paper was covered in algebra problems and I remember thinking it would be a nice way to occupy my mind and time. So I set to solving the equations but also knew it, too, was a message. Algebra and math was always easy for me in school. I loved the challenge and the step-by-step process and rules to follow. So perhaps there is something in life that is similar?

Recognizing the messages I had been waiting for had been revealed, I got up and took over the OBE, flying out of my bedroom and down the stairs to the front door. When I opened the front door it flew open and disappeared. Outside the sky changed from dreary, dark and rainy to blue skies and a brilliant day. In front of me was a forest of Magnolia trees (a strong will and resolve to make changes in life when needed). When I noticed them I felt giddy with glee.

As I flew among the trees I saw that the dreary, rainy skies were all around me but I was left untouched inside my bubble of light. I remember thinking the rain and dreariness would surely get me, but my bubble of light remained and I took thrill in this.

Then a force began to pull me upward. I surrendered to it, allowing myself to be pulled upward with greater and greater speed. My eyes automatically closed but every once in a while I would peek out and I would see those Magnolia trees below me. I smiled and then shifted back into my body.

Message: Go to Florida

When I shifted back to my body I remained in the in-between as I thought of the OBE I had just had. My memory here is faded, though. I know I went back OOB but I don’t remember anything about it except talking to someone and being told, “Go to Florida.”

When I woke I struggled to remember the song I had been singing in my OBE. For some reason the song, A Whole New World was in my head, but I know that was not the song. The section of the song that was repeating, “I can show you the world….let me share this whole new world with you.”

I am not sure what the message about Florida is all about. lol It felt like when the opportunity arises I should go, whenever – if ever – that is.

Overall, a nice OBE if not a little odd. 🙂

 

 

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Premonitions and OBE

After a day of furniture shopping for our sons’ new bunk bed in which we ended up buying much more (lol), I fell asleep quite quickly. Unfortunately, I woke around 4am and couldn’t go back to sleep. I was regretting a certain piece of furniture and worrying over some others. Typical buyer’s regret. lol

I was also annoyed by a completely clogged nose, well only one side. There is nothing more annoying IMO!

By around 5am, still unable to sleep, I gave up and opted to meditate while sitting in bed. As I meditated, though, I became more and more sleepy until eventually I turned off the light and fell asleep.

The last thing I remember is a song going through my head:

“Don’t worry, ’bout a thing. Every little thing’s gonna be alright.:

Visions of 2020

I didn’t fall straight to sleep. Instead I lingered in the in-between where I was talking to a man about things to come. I don’t remember asking to know this but, funny enough I remember wondering about what 2020 will bring a couple of days ago.

It all began as a vision. It was so clear that it pulled me out of my reverie. In the vision, I saw my step-father in a hospital bed with oxygen and other cords attached. He looked okay – not at death’s door or anything – but he was most definitely wearing a hospital gown and in a hospital bed. I knew immediately that this was a premonition. I also knew it didn’t necessarily mean he would die.

I remember discussing a scenario where my family moved in with my mom. I suspect I was looking farther ahead to when she would be a widow, living alone in her big house. I came out of this min-dream or vision thinking, “She would never agree to move.”

Then I recall a vision of a black man who was a tad gray and unfamiliar. My cousin, who recently split with her long-term and much younger boyfriend, was dating this older man and moving back to L.A. I remember being surprised because she has always talked about living in the country in her little home until the day she died. Perhaps love changes her mind? She currently lives in a double wide mobile home on family land. The home is in horrible disrepair from years of her letting pets and animals live inside with her and also not being very cleanly.

There was a scenario where my husband was asked to renovate the home and I remember tying it into the idea of moving in with my mom. I thought of our family living in the mobile home while we renovated it. It is literally a walk away from my Mom’s house.

Suddenly, I shifted into what was very obviously a lucid dream. I walked to my cousin’s house, which had been abandoned by her. Inside everything was as she left it. The first thing I saw was a fish aquarium with tons of tiny fish that looked like cats. The fish were hungry and gathering at the front. I got out some food and fed them while talking to someone about how odd it was for my cousin to just leave them and her other animals behind.

In the corner of the room was a bed. Tired, I lay down on it to sleep. When I looked up at the ceiling, though, I saw two visuals of the wall/ceiling. One was the dream scene, another was my own bedroom. I knew instinctively that this was an invitation to go OOB. I think, though, that whoever I was talking to indicated this telepathically, also.

OBE

Without hesitation, I decided to leave my body, though sleep tempted me to fall into oblivion.

OOB now, I was still talking to a man who seemed to be with me. For some reason I see him as a young black man and assume he is my cousin’s ex-boyfriend.

I fly out of the house and outside. The sensation of flying is wonderful and I hover near the barn intent on investigating my grandparent’s property while OOB which I do not recall doing often, if ever. My vision is full-on but everything is blurry and shifty.

Suddenly I am pulled upward toward the sky. I remember telling someone, “I don’t want to go up” while at the same time surrendering to the pull because I know that to fight it will likely pull me back into my body. I end up pausing over the tops of the trees.

Someone is with me and we go into a space full of people. It appears to be a party. There are people crowded in brightly lit, golden hued room but I  hear no music and they are not dancing or moving about like people in a party do. They do seem to be conversing with one another, though. I try to focus in on their faces to see if I know any of them but their faces blur the minute I try to focus. I speak to a few but get no responses. It is like they are asleep or not really there. Despite all this, I am very excited and feel like a child, curious and wide-eyed.

There is a distinct shift and I know I return to my body but I do not wake up or shift back OOB. I assume I fall victim to my exhaustion so some lucidity is lost.

Lucid Dream: Ship of Darkness and Giant Turtle Guide

The next thing I remember is being high up in the trees with others watching a scene below that is hard to recall now. I believe there are people below me swimming in clear water. The people are children and a child is with me, to my left. The entire scene is reminiscent of a fantasy book illustration. It has a very dreamy quality, brilliant colors and sparkly air that is alive with lights.

A woman to my right is instructing me to do something but I don’t remember what she tells me to do now. What I recall next is that the woman has a serpent-like, white body that moves toward me. I am drawn to her and feel that she is inviting me to join or merge with her. The energy is intoxicating and I remember hearing a female voice inviting me to come to her, telling me not to resist. I have a consideration that I am being tempted to do something “bad” but I don’t care and immediately toss the idea knowing it is not bad and fear is clouding my judgment.

I surrender to her and she wraps her tail around me, igniting my lower chakras in pleasure. I remember feeling drawn to stay with her forever but say, “I don’t want this. I want….”. What I want is a feeling that cannot be described in words.

Then I am standing with the woman at what appears to be the entry into another world. We are on the deck of a huge, black ship. The ship surges into a dark space with dark water. Inside, the ship doesn’t go far because it encounters a wall of round, black rocks. It turns back and then enters the blackness again and again, each time stopped by rocks.

I say to the woman, “There are only rocks here.” I am looking for an opening and there is a feeling that just beyond the rocks lies what I am seeking. I believe I am seeking a reunion with Self, or that is what it feel like anyway.

On the third trip into the dark waters I turn to the boat toward the rocks and get off. There is a small child with me who walks ahead of me. I only see the child’t feet, though, and at times the feet of the child shift to my own feet wearing black boots. We/I walk across volcanic-like rocks in the water. The child’s foot touches the water and a snapping turtle head pops up. Then I am watching a turtles attempt to bite my booted foot. Thrilled, I yell, “Look! A turtle! He is trying to bite my foot!”

On the other side of the rocks and water I turn back and see the turtle has grown so large that it fills up the water and towers above me. I grab onto his shell, fascinated and overjoyed to be holding onto him. I can see and feel the shell. It is very real!

The turtle disappears and someone (the turtle maybe?) hands me a penny that is the size of a basketball. I am told to kiss the penny eight times, breathing in with one kiss and out with the other. I do this, knowing that I am setting an intention for all things to work in my favor. It is my “lucky penny”. I remember breathing in deeply and kissing the penny, flipping it over, breathing out and kissing it again. The penny looks very dark like the rest of the place, as if it has been sitting at the bottom of the dark water for ages.

Interpretation 

When I wake up I know that my dream is showing me my future and giving me advice on how to handle what is to come. The darkness is the unknown. The black ship is the unknown, subconscious and perhaps unpleasant emotion. I enter it three times, each time encountering a dead-end filled with black boulders which are obstacles to progress. I do not give up and on the third try stop the boat and climb over the rocks across dark, deep water where I encounter a turtle. Turtles are wisdom and patience and this turtle feels like a guide. I am given an over-sized penny and told to kiss it eight times a certain way. Pennies are good luck and it feels that if I handle it correctly luck will be mine.

What is it I am looking for in this dark place? Well, prior to going there I am pulled into the snake woman where the Kundalini temps me. I do not resist but when asked to remain in the bliss I resist, recognizing it is not what I want. Specifically what I don’t want is the very sexually intense experience that tends to trap individuals in the lower chakras. I am shown that to find what I seek I must delve into “dark waters”. The ship keeps me afloat, though, which indicates I will not drown in the unknown but sail above it. Ultimately, I find a path through the darkness and a guide in the turtle. The penny can be luck as well as new beginnings.

 

 

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Kundalini Yoga Meditation Practice and Short OBE

It’s been a busy week and with Christmas just around the corner I expect it to just get busier. My husband is back home at least, which helps. 🙂

I’ve started a new Kundalini Yoga meditation routine and plan to continue it for the recommended 40 days. The meditations are one of many from the book I recently purchased called The Art of Making Sex Sacred. I specifically selected two meditation to help me with specific issues. The first is a meditation to work on trust, trust of others, of life and of self. The second is to assist with stress and anxiety. It is composed of breathwork, or pranayama. You take 8 deep, quick breaths in through your nose, filling your lungs completely, and then let out a long breath through your nose for 8 counts that empties your lungs completely.

Here is an example of the first meditation. You only have to do 1.5 minutes, then you can build up to the full 11 minutes:

Here is an example of the second meditation. Again, you build up to the full length.

I have completed about five days of my 40 so far and for two days now have noticed some subtle energy in my third-eye and crown when meditating. Last night the second meditation was very, very relaxing to me. I could have done if much longer than I did. Breathwork seems always to be the most relaxing to me anyway (except Breath of Fire), so I am not surprised.

The videos are an excellent way to begin practicing these meditations. This particular woman has several on her YouTube channel you can check out. I do not use the videos myself because 1. I can’t do the mediation as long as she does and 2. I find the computer prevents me from relaxing fully.

Short OBE

I’ve not been sleeping very well for about a week beginning around the recent full moon. Thankfully, last night I slept really well and this morning was gifted with a lovely OBE.

My youngest woke up crying because his leg was asleep and so I got up briefly to help him manage it. When I attempted to return to sleep I just sort of meditated and drifted into the in-between.

Somehow I found myself conversing with someone I did not see but I could hear his voice quite clearly. The last thing I remember him saying is, “Go to [look through] the blinds.”

I became aware of being able to leave my body and so I did, floating up above it and letting myself be drawn as if by an unseen force into the space next to my bed. As I floated I kept my eyes closed and just relaxed. I began to sing a song about love but I can’t recall the words now even though I remembered them for some time after coming back into my body.

I floated on my back, facing the ceiling, and finally opened my eyes just slightly to see where I was. There was a sense that if I opened my eyes I would see the bedroom and it would pull me back into my body but I still peaked out. Above me the ceiling was much higher, a dome that extended at least a hundred feet above me. The dome was filled with glass – windows I think – that sparkled with light like crystals. What is interesting is that at my level the bedroom looked like it normally does. Knowing I was very close to my sleeping body, I closed my eyes to avoid the possibility of losing such a pleasant experience.

Eventually I shifted to a more vertical position. Eyes still closed, I continued to sing and noted the quality of my voice was much more feminine and smooth than it is in the physical. It was almost angelic and there was a sweetness to it that pleased me. The words I sang were about love, a deep, connected love; Divine love.

I remembered (or maybe was reminded) of what I was told prior to exiting my body – “Go to the blinds.” I floated over to where the window was, took one finger to the blinds and opened them, intending to look through the window. Before I could look out my intent shifted as if pulled away by my Higher Self and my focus shifted within. My lower chakras began to fill with a pleasant energy that morphed into the Kundalini bliss of which I am so familiar. The energy pulled me into the physical. I lingered in my bed, eyes closed, for a while, enjoying the energy and not wanting it to end.

Song

Intent on remembering the song I was singing, I went over it and over it for as long as I could but must have been pulled into the in-between because there is a space in my memory that is lost. Then I heard something downstairs and got up quickly. When I returned to bed I had forgotten my song. Another song was on my mind, though, one that I have been hearing upon waking for a couple of days now:

The lyrics that tend to repeat in my head are: “I believe that the heart does go on”. Yet this morning the part that was repeating was, “Once more you open the door.”

It seems to me that my guide was asking me to go to the blinds, to look through them, in an attempt to show me something within myself that is always there: Love/Divine Connection/Bliss. In my OBE when I went to the blinds and attempted to look out the window I was pulled within and into the Kundalini bliss.

I also feel as if the lyrics I heard this morning are a message that my heart will be “opened” again.

 

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OBE: Impressionable

It has been an eventful few days. It feels like some major shifts are underway, and not just energetically.

First, I’ve had some developments in terms of my spiritual services. For the first time in a while I did a session in my own home. I smudged the entire home first and then set up an area downstairs. The energy felt very good and balanced and the session went well. With my children gone at school all day I can return to offering my services in-person and so this was the first step in doing that.

Another interesting development was that yesterday I was offered a part-time personal training job at the YMCA. I applied back at the end of September and out of the blue they called, interviewed and offered me a job on the spot. I have yet to receive the paperwork I need to complete but feel like this is an opportunity to go in a new direction if I want.

Spiritually, yesterday I felt strong energy in my third-eye. It has been such a long time since I have experienced that, so it was nice! I have been feeling less and less anxious, too, which is wonderful and could indicate a successful clearing of a stubborn blockage.

Then last night I had an unexpected OBE followed by a dream where I was given a message.

OBE: Impressionable

I had a few exits from my body. When I exited the first time, I went out my bedroom door and was pull right back into my body. The second time I felt like I had blankets wrapped around my feet. I kicked them off and headed out into the hallway. I tried to look at my hands to solidify my energy, but couldn’t see them. My vision would not turn on. My energy felt odd, too – not heavy, not unstable, just different. I remained in this portion of the astral for a while but I don’t remember much now. I think I ran into my middle son, though. I also believe I made it outside because that is where I was when I went back to my body.

On my third exit I came out of my body feeling much more stable. I could see but it was dark in my bedroom. I moved through the hallway and down the stairs where I encountered my sons. They were very active, like flying in zigzags around me similar to how they act when they are playing. I invited them to come outside with me and they did.

Outside it was dark and unfamiliar. The streets were there but not in the right place. I recall walking down the street with my son when I saw a young man walking toward us. He had on a hooded sweatshirt and was no one I knew. I approached him and asked him who he was. I suspected he was not real but when he responded intelligently I remember correcting myself aloud saying, “Oh, you aren’t a ghost” or something similar.

Then a strange looking vehicle came to pick up the young man. It was triangle shaped and low to the ground. The top of the triangle was the roof and it was flat. I jumped on top of it and sat down, noticing the two doors hinged open, connected the the top. I said, “Wow! We must be in the future!” I don’t recall if the vehicle had wheels. I don’t think so.

Then my vision began to fade out and I felt like I was going to go back to my body. I didn’t want this so remember talking to myself about how to get more stable. I began to look up at the sky, which I couldn’t see, and tell myself how I controlled my experience. I said, “The sky is beautiful” and imagined a colorful sunrise/sunset with oranges and yellows, fluffy clouds, etc. To my surprise the picture manifested, chasing away the darkness. I floated face up there a while marveling at the sky.

To my surprise, my vision blacked out for a while and I felt myself making a shift. When my vision returned I was inside a room full of individual, divided desks like you would see at a testing center. Some of the desks had people sitting at them. I walked around the room, seemingly talking to myself about whether I had time to do what I needed to and decisions that needed to be made. I can’t recall now what it was, though. It felt like I was being asked to make an appointment. Maybe to take a test or be evaluated? Whatever it was, it felt like I was seeking counsel.

The room layout had the desks in a U-shaped format and as I walked back around to the start of it I encountered a woman sitting at a desk. Her location in the room made her seem like a proctor or at the very least a teacher. When I saw her my entire OBE solidified instantly. Her face became the focal point, crystal clear in my vision to the point that I do not even remember her having a body. When I saw her I studied her face a while and thought to myself, “I know her.” She was about my age, plain looking with her brown hair pulled back tightly around her face. Her face was oval with a prominent chin. She had brown eyes and thin lips.

She spoke to me. “You’re impressionable,” she said matter-of-factly. I was still staring at her marveling at how crystal clear she was and how real the experience was.

A female voice from behind me said, “You’re suppose to be here to help.” I glanced behind me and saw the voice came from a student dressed in plain clothing that looked like a uniform.

I responded to both of them with, “I’m definitely not very welcoming.” I smiled, laughing a bit but they did not laugh. Realizing this was “serious” I focused back on the woman.

She said to me, “You still have a little time left.” As she said this, she turned to a bulletin board as if showing me something, but I didn’t look at the board so I don’t know if it had any information on it pertaining to me.

I woke not long after the last message. I returned to my body slowly and recall not resisting it. A part of me wanted to wake up.

Message

It was 4:30am. I couldn’t return to sleep after that. There was more to the words throughout this interaction. Most of it was unsaid; telepathic. I was going over and over the memory. I knew I needed to remember.

When I was told I was impressionable I felt like it had to do with life distracting me. Physical life changes my personality. I go from free-loving, free-flowing, open and positive to overly serious and easily bogged down by things that are not really important. However, upon further inspection, it could have been that she wanted me to know that I am open or receptive right now.

When I was reminded that I am here to help, I recall thinking I was suppose to be “welcoming” others to Earth. There was more a feeling of this than a thought. A visual comes to mind. I am standing, waiting at the threshold between the old and the new Earth. People come through this opening or gate and I welcome them. These people are just waking up. It feels like my job is to greet and direct them on to their destination. I knew I was not doing a good job of it, which is why I laughed saying I was not very welcoming.

I am then reminded that I chose to stay a bit longer. My previous dream comes to mind where I felt I was given an option to stay here and continue this life/work or go to a healing place and resume my work as a teacher. How much time “a little time” is, I don’t know.

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Dream: Godmother

Somehow I managed to fall asleep and entered into a semi-lucid dream at my grandparent’s old house. Inside it looked more like a doctor’s office, though. I was taken to a room, which had a patient chair draped in white, and directed to lay on it. I did as I was told. An older woman with gray hair entered the room. I called her by name but all I remember of the name is “Godmother”. The woman began to tell me things about another person, things I needed to know in order to help them. The person was male but she never gave a name. She told me that he was likely to fixate on something. All I remember of the details are images that resembled a calendar with weeks highlighted. It felt like he would be fixated on something for weeks. I remember feeling a bit out of it during this time, like I was in a trance or like I was not meant to remember the details so my memory was wiped or a block was placed.

The woman left and I realized she had never told me his name. I got up and followed her. When I saw her I tapped her on the back to get her attention. When she turned around she looked different, old and gray but different, but I knew it was still her. I said, “What is his name? You never told me his name?” She said, “How should I know?” I said, “How am I suppose to help him if I don’t know his name?” She never answered and I shifted into another dream.