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Remembering George Michael

Growing up in the 80’s, I loved Wham!, but especially George Michael. I had posters of him on my bedroom wall (yeah) and he was really my only popstar crush, besides Richard Marx that is. lol When the news came out that he was homosexual (actually bisexual) I was really bummed.

I never really got into music like other kids my age or like my sister, who was crazy into music and still is. I credit my sister for introducing me to any and all music I listened to up until I entered high school. Music like Madonna, Heart, T’Pau, Chicago, Michael Jackson,  The Bangles, Duran Duran, Foreigner, REO Speedwagon, Tears for Fears, Pet Shop Boys, Genesis,  U2, etc. You get the idea. My sister had the records (later cassettes) and I just listened because she played music all.the.time and use to do pretend music videos with my cousin. LOL Later, I developed my own preferences in music, shifting to the alternative rock and grunge genre but there will always be a special place in my heart for the music of the 80’s.

Last week, in the days leading up to Christmas, I kept hearing George Michael songs playing. At one point I took notice because it was so rampant, like every radio station was playing his music. The song I remember playing the most was Faith, but there was also an old Wham! song playing, I think it was Careless Whisper.

I forgot all about the repeating songs until I found out about his death. Then all the memories kinda clicked and I thought, “Maybe I was getting a heads up? Hmmm.”

This morning I woke up with one of his songs in my head for some reason:  Don’t Let the Sun Go Down on Me, with Elton John. It seemed like another reminder. I wondered about it. Perhaps I needed to reflect on that time period in my life again? Considering I have been dreaming about giving away a younger version of myself (inner child perhaps) maybe this is a sign that I am letting go of the past, or a part of myself that is not longer useful. Deep, inner healing and clearing necessary for moving forward?

Mostly I liked George Michael’s music in the mid-80’s when he was still a part of Wham! When I hear those old songs I tend to be transported back to that time in my life. It’s instant and so are the feelings that accompany it. There is an opening of awareness of Self, like the very first lighting of an inner fire, that took place when I was about 10 years old and continued through high school. Every song from that time period seems imprinted in my memory with events, like a photo album in my mind, but the music and voice of George Michael will always have a special place in my heart/life/memory.

Here are just some of my most favorite George Michael songs. Enjoy!

Here is a link to the most popular hits of his career if you want to hear more.

 

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Dreams: Separated and Goodbye

I’m not sure what was going on last night but I had so many vivid, in-depth dreams! There are so many this post could become very long. I will focus primarily on the ones that remain in my mind now, several hours after waking.

Dream: Separated

I’m a little girl, blonde, blue-eyed – much like this lifetime. I am with my twin brother but we are not identical. He is the opposite of me in looks – dark hair and eyes. He is also older than me and this confuses me in the dream. How can we be twins if we are not the same age??

He is talking to me about our separation. He misses me and is even crying. He says we stayed together until I was 3 and then I went to live with my mother. Up until that point we spoke the same language. In the dream that language was Spanish. He said I forgot the language when we were apart.

There is much upset on both our parts but mainly his. I am surprised and a bit confused in the dream. I know him as my brother but can’t remember ever speaking Spanish. My waking consciousness keeps interfering, wanting to become lucid, so the whole idea of having a twin confuses me. I am reminded of all the times in my dreams when I speak Spanish and the actual physical life experiences and encounters I’ve had. He talks very fast and excitedly as if wanting to catch up on all the lost time.

Interpreation

This dream actually seems to be about my other half and recovering memories. I have a theory that I have been mulling over in regards to this. I’ve had dreams of a dark haired boy quite frequently, even in my childhood. After a recent OBE in which I saw this same boy I wondered if perhaps when I go OOB I am traveling to a different period on this timeline to act as a guide to him. That maybe we have been doing this for each other all of this life? When I was very small, around 2-3 years old, I played with an imaginary friend (so my mom and sister tell me). They told me the friend was male. I don’t remember so I don’t know. However, one of the first things my Companion asked me when I saw him in an OBE was, “Do you not remember me?” I have often wondered if perhaps he was my imaginary friend and maybe we had been spending lots of time together in dreamtime, the in-between and astral. It’s very likely.

Dream: Goodbye

I am traveling very fast in a car at night with my husband. He is sometimes at the wheel and other times not. We are lost and I am panicking because he keeps falling asleep and I have to take the wheel. One time when this happens I lose control of the car and we end up in the ditch.

We get out and I look around. It is unfamiliar and I don’t know which way to go. My husband leaves, handing me a very large pistol the size of a small rifle. The gun is in three pieces, though, and I have to put it back together to make it functional. It did have bullets and looked like an over-sized, black revolver when I finished putting it together.

My husband seems to vanish in the dream at this point and I am deciding which direction to take. Do I go straight and take the dirt path? Or do I go to my left which is a winding sidewalk with signs indicating it leads to a community?  I begin to walk down the dirt path, holding the gun in front of me but the trees seem to get denser and denser and it gets really dark. It feels scary to me and I stop. I know I need to get to civilization so I turn back toward the sidewalk path.

Suddenly there is a large group of women coming to greet me. They seem helpful and wise and I am not afraid of them. They encourage me to come with them but I am hesitant. I finally decide to go with them but stop and put a pink coat on a small, blonde child. For some reason, then, it seems I am sending the child to go with them and I am staying. I adjust the sleeves on the jacket and say goodbye to the child. As I do this I am overwhelmed with emotion and begin to sob. There is such grief that it wakes me up, tears still streaming down my face.

Symbolism

Car – Life path. Since I’m in the car with my husband, it is our joint path.
Accident – Guilt or something I am not proud of.
Gun – Aggression or potential anger; masculine considerations; caution should be taken.
Paths- Options available to me and my reaction to those options.
Pink – Healing through love.
Child – Aspect of myself. Perhaps I am sending away my inner child for healing? The emotion here felt like I was losing someone I loved dearly but there was also fear, like a loss involved.

keysDream: Goodbye (again)

I am at a house that is not familiar. Fumbling in the cabinet for tea bags, I find the last two and then see a heart-shaped key ring. I take the key-ring and the tea bags. I decide to use the key ring in place of the old one I have. I locate my keys. There are more than I have in real life and they are heavy and disorganized. I replace the main key ring with the heart-shaped one and place it on my luggage. I talk with a woman about her luggage at this point and tell her I couldn’t put my keys on mine because it would have to go on the bottom. I see her carry-on bag. It is black.

As I start to leave the house, I prepare laundry. I pull down the laundry soap. It is travel-sized, but I never do the laundry. Instead, I sit on top of the dryer as I talk to the woman. Then a door seems to appear behind the dryer and I am heading out. The woman stops me. I see a small, blonde child. He (I assume he is my son in real life) comes up to me and says, “Do you still love me?” I stopped, my heart overflowing and say, “Of course I still love you! I will always love you!” I kiss him on the top of his white-blonde hair and leave him with the other woman. It feels like I am giving him away.

Symbolism

Tea bag – need for calm in life.
Key ring – adaptability.
Keys – adaptability, accessing information, personal power.
Luggage – desires, worries, responsibilities, or needs that are weighing you down.
Laundry – Preparing to rid self of past hurts; cleansing.
Soap – Need to wash away past worries and emotions; guilt or shame.
Child – Likely represents an aspect of myself. In this case I am leaving a part of myself behind but this part is safe and loved.

Dream: Piggy Swear

I only recall the last part of this dream and only because it was so weird! In it, I am hooking my pinky finger with four other pinkies. It creates a circle of hands all linked by pinky fingers. I remember someone saying, “Piggy swear” instead of “Pinky swear”. I have no idea what it means because it doesn’t make any sense and is almost funny. That is what wakes me up.

Symbolism

Pinky finger – Mental power, intellect, memory and communication.
Circle – Connection, completion, wholeness.

 

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Dream: Kundalini Rehab

Merry Christmas! Hope you all enjoyed time with family and friends. I experienced yet again a disconnected from this holiday. All the materialism is getting to me more and more each year that passes. I wanted to go on a family vacation and just skip the entire holiday but that wasn’t to be. So, I participated and focused on watching my children delight in their many gifts. This morning I am tolerating the chaos and disorganization of my household as my kids enjoy playing with their new gifts.

I also got to hang out with my brother who was home on leave from Tallahassee, Florida. He’s been attending technical training through the U.S. Air Force to be a crew chief (mechanic). He works on fighter jets. Pretty awesome, huh? I haven’t seen him since he left for boot camp. When I saw him I was impressed. Not only does he appear more mature (physically and emotionally) but he was very obviously happy. Instead of seeing him as baby brother I saw him as a man. I’m proud of him! He leaves for Phoenix, AZ this week, which is where he will be stationed from now on.

My brother is so cool. He is a natural healer (Reiki 1 attuned), is fascinated by astrology and all things spiritual and has even succeeded in having lucid dreams and OBEs. He has been this way since he was a child and we have always had a special connection.

Anyway, Christmas was good despite my disconnection from the holiday. I have been feeling odd, though. My heart has been flaring up and I have been unable to fall asleep the last couple of days. Then, when I wake I feel strange and somewhat alienated from the world and everyone in it. Yesterday I started crying a few times throughout the day. It was from feeling Homesick.

Dream: Kundalini Rehab

I fell asleep sometime after midnight and it seemed I was dreaming the same dream all night. In the dream I was in L.A. with a group inside a nice hotel room. I knew the members of this group. We all seemed young despite having the wisdom that only experience over many lifetimes brings. I was with a woman and a man I seemed to have a deep soul connection to. In the dream our connection manifested as a romantic involvement but not sexual. The woman was especially familiar and she and I interacted quite a bit. There was also one man who seemed older than the rest of us. He had silver in his hair and he appeared to be the facilitator of our group.

All of us in the group were there because we were addicts. It seemed like we were in a rehab program of some sort. Yet the addiction we had was not to any drug, though it was referred to as a “drug” in the dream. I knew the drug was Kundalini. We were there to learn to cope with the powerful effects of this drug. I remember wanting to leave and asking when I could go. I didn’t want to experience Kundalini anymore and was frustrated by its effects on me and the inability to control them.

There was a part of the dream which was odd. We were all naked and I was spooning with a man but there was no sexual connection there. When it was time to go, I got up and put on my underwear, hiding my nakedness from everyone despite everyone being naked and us all seeming comfortable being around each other that way. I remember asking someone if I should put on fresh underwear and then choosing my old pair anyway. There was a feeling that we had to leave soon and we were all going to stay in touch, some of us were going to leave together. I was to go with the man and woman who I knew. I thought I was to leave at 1:30 to catch a flight home.

The main discussion I recall having then was about the purchase of a plane ticket. I remember saying I had bought a one-way ticket home yet when someone called to confirm my flight, which was to leave at 1:30pm, she was told the flight didn’t exist. I was surprised and asked her to check again using the flight number. No such flight existed but there was a flight that left at 6:00pm. A round-trip ticket. I didn’t want a round-trip ticket and told them I could just drive my car back when I wanted to return. For some reason this was not to be and the round-trip ticket was the one I would take. I was going to have to return.

Message

I woke up at 5:30am still tired and not wanting to wake up. I was not happy about the dream because it left me feeling like I was nowhere near an end to what has been going on in my life. I just want the Kundalini to complete it’s circuit and move on and leave me alone. I blame it for the upheaval in my life. My guidance reminded me to remain in a holding pattern for now, to continue to follow the guidelines they had given me. These guidelines are to meditate, do yoga, eat for my dosha, avoid strenuous exercise and continue to focus on 3D for the time being.

The time period of six months came to mind. This would mean sometime around June/July next year. Interestingly, I have had a couple of OBEs where there is reference to July 4th as my birthday. I had another one recently that I didn’t post. In it I was protesting my birthday, telling everyone they were celebrating too early and July 4th was NOT my birthday. lol This is also the time frame I was given for when I would attain “wholeness”.

Los Angeles

One thing I was thinking of when I woke was that I was in Los Angeles again. I’ve been to L.A. in OBEs and dreams for about a year now. I have very few connections to L.A. I have no desire to live there (had a dream about relocating there) and no desire to even visit the city. In fact, I’ve only been to that city maybe four or five times in my entire life and was not really impressed. lol Yet again I dreamed of L.A. and it was made very obvious to me that I was in the city. In an OBE I was even given a tour of the city and remember wondering what I was doing there to the point of irritation. lol

So this morning I finally asked. What is up with the L.A. theme? The thought came to me to consider what L.A. means: Los Angeles. City of Angels. Okay, so what, right? lol Angels = spirituality, heaven, ascension, enlightenment, etc. It is a destination.

So I looked up the dream symbolism. Los Angeles relates to one’s spiritual quest. It signifies opportunities and the creation of your own success.

So I guess I have another six months at least of this spiritual quest. Makes sense I guess. Why, then, am I not excited about any of it?

Edit: After reading a post by Molly (thank you!) where she mentioned suicide it brought back a part of my dream I had forgotten. One of the members of my group had committed suicide. Whether this is significant or not, who knows, but the memory came with a very serious feeling.

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OBE: Over the Fence

I had a busy night and morning. Seems I’ve passed a milestone, or something like that.

Toward evening I began watching a Netflix series everyone has been talking about. It’s called The OA. It’s just down my ally – NDE’s, astral travel, empathic connections, psychic premonitions, etc. I only watched two episodes and in both I ended up crying. Not because of something in the show but because my guidance began to come through in their silent but unmistakable way. I recovered quickly from the feeling despite it being once again that, “Get ready for change” message I’ve been receiving for some time.

During my nightly meditation I felt the familiar warm energy in my heart. I have missed it so much! My third-eye and root chakras joined in along with the solar plexus. The energy stayed with me for quite some time, following me into sleep.

Kundalini Dream

This will be a shortened version of the experience because it is quite personal in nature.

I was in a car lot discussing the purchase of a new car. I was trading in my old one, a black sedan of some sort. The one I chose was a silver Volkswagen, maybe a Jetta but I’m not sure. I was really pleased and showing a friend of mine. He was distracted, though, and seemed somewhat concerned about something else. I remember saying I had gotten $50k for my trade-in (I wish!! lol).

He stayed with me and we chatted for some time. Eventually the discussion went to a new cell phone I had just gotten. I was playing with it, exploring the apps on it and trying to figure out why the font was so large and funky. I remember the phone had a message something like, “Will you be accepting T-Mobile…” I can’t remember now what it was asking fully, but it had to do with communication. I was talking excitedly about my phone, showing him how it worked and smiling.

Then I was singing a song to him. I don’t remember the melody now, but it was sweet. I said, “All you have to do is let your cards fall where they may…” The memory of the words is also a picture of someone dropping a deck of cards and them slowly falling on the floor. I recall seeing this woman singing but she was also me as the words were coming out of my mouth. It was like she was talking to both of us. I turned and saw my friend had lightened up and was relaxing.

The next thing I remember is lying face up and seeing his face close up to mine. We were nose to nose and he was smiling at me. It felt tender and loving and I was not afraid. He kissed me and I kissed him back. A shock went straight through my heart and then I was filled with a love so powerful that I lost my breath and thought for sure I would pass out. He pulled back and smiled at me. I saw the glimmer of humor in his eyes. He knew exactly how he was affecting me. I didn’t withdraw but just stared back at him, smiling. Then he kissed me again with the same affect. I lingered there, feeling his lips and his energy mingling with mine. It was beautiful.

The heart energy became so intense at this point that it activated my root and third-eye chakras. A full blast of Kundalini began to make its way up toward my heart. The power of it woke me. The energy continued for some time after I woke. I cried slow, happy tears.

In-Between: Conversations with a Friend

It took me a long while to fall back to sleep after that. It wasn’t until around 5:30am that I slipped into the in-between. While there I was talking to someone about a job. I was setting up an appointment for an interview. I was told to call and set the date. There was no phone in my hand yet I remember hearing the phone ringing. At this point I heard my friend David talking as if on the line, like a three-way call. He was excited, telling me how his plane had landed and minutes after it landed an inversion cloud formed right over it. I could see this oval-shaped, white cloud in my mind. It reminded me of a space craft. I remember realizing he was on the line with me when a voice mail picked up. In front of me I saw a computer screen and there was a black box in the upper right hand corner. From it came instructions to leave a message. I never did because I recognized David’s voice and said to him, “How did you get on the line?” I was laughing, though, because he repeated the story about the inversion cloud and was super excited about it.

Realizing my friend was there and I could talk with him, I began to tell him about an in-between experience I had just had (it really happened). I was walking down a hallway and just as I crossed by the opening to the living area I saw a huge group of people all wearing blue jerseys. They cheered as I walked by and I stopped and looked at them. They looked like a football team. I heard then, “Team” very loudly in my head. It made me laugh because I knew this was my team of guides making a joke. Funny guys!

OBE: Over the Fence

David listened as I excitedly told him my story. Then I became distracted. I saw a young girl climbing a wood privacy fence. There was an urge to climb it, too, and I yelled to her, “Hey! I want to climb it with you!” I ran over to her (and OOB) and jumped up and over the fence. She immediately disappeared. I knew I was OOB. I flew to another part of the fence intent on balancing on top. I remembered I had no feet and only needed to float to accomplish this. I skimmed along the top and the dropped down to the grass below.

Then I soared up into the air and took a good look at the place. I was in a suburban neighborhood somewhere. The grass was very green and in the distance I could see the lights of a fairly large city. There were some small hills but overall the terrain was flat and looked like a park. I decided to settle back down to the ground and said aloud, “I want more clarity. I want this to be real.” The scene instantly brightened and became more real just like I requested.

I walked along for a while, talking to myself. It was like I was praying aloud or saying affirmations. I said, “I want peace. I can do this. I will be happy….” I walked next to a large fountain with a fish pond of dark water. I decided to dip my hands into the water. There was some trepidation here because I didn’t know what was under the water’s surface. Yet I pushed myself to dip my hand all the way down and grab whatever was underneath. The water was cold. I felt something and pulled my hand out quickly. It was just old leaves but for some reason it freaked me out because they clung to my hand. I imagined creepy bugs and dead things for a split second and then cleared my mind. I repeated my affirmations. “I can do this. I want peace.” My vision blacked out as I continued to repeat, “I want peace.” My awareness returned to my body.

Considerations

When I woke my heart and third-eye were still active and I felt relaxed, calm, almost peaceful. This is very welcomed considering how I’ve been feeling lately. I recognize the OBE symbolism right away. I flew over a fence. Fences in a dream represent obstacles and feeling “fenced in”. Then I pushed myself to dip my hands into dark water, not knowing what I would find. I did this despite fear bubbling to the surface of my thoughts. What I feared was there was nothing at all like reality, though. My affirmations confirmed my willingness to move past my fears and seek what I want from this life. I can do this.

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Kundalini Dream and Reconstitution

Woke at 5am again and could not remember one dream. I requested to go OOB and heard, “No.” I understood straight away that my energy body wasn’t adequately charged or aligned for an OBE this morning. Disappointed, I asked, “Then can I just get something? Anything? Maybe more Kundalini??” lol I didn’t get a response which to me is the same as, “Maybe” or “Okay.”

Dream: Renting Rooms

I was in a small, older house, with a group of people. There was much activity. I sat in a chair next to a sofa in the living area with several others. The sofa was gold, like from the 1960-70’s. It was very worn in certain places and had a multi-colored crocheted throw draped over the back.

I chatted with someone about a job. The job was similar to a physical trainer but with EMT-type experience. There was a young girl in need of one of these trainers for when she exercised because she had a disability and might pass out mid-exercise. Her disability involved inability to breathe and seizures. What is odd was that it felt like I may need this kind of help – like the girl of the discussion was really me.

I changed the topic to going fishing. I suggested three places. In my mind I could see them. One was a lake, another a pond and another a circular section of a river. I remember saying, “I haven’t gone fishing in a long time. I would really love to go.” It was agreed that we would go but then I couldn’t find my glasses. I searched, finding various other pairs that were not mine. Right when I figured I would give up my search, I decided to look in a drawer. I found them tucked away inside. I remember saying that they were “well worn” and “old”.

I never left the house. The next thing I recall was that rooms were being rented out for the day for various purposes. I watched as two women got keys to a room from an older, dark haired lady. They went inside and locked the door. It was obvious they were lovers and I remember smirking and then wondering if maybe all the rooms were being rented to couples.

I knew I was an employee there, like a caretaker and part of the “crew”. I gathered up dirty, blue bedding and washed it. After seeing the couple go into the room I was a bit grossed out handling the bedding. lol As I was working I saw a very tiny, blonde woman with her small child hiding in the corner. I went over to investigate and she spoke to me in another language. She seemed to be crouching in the corner near the washing machine and I wondered if she was frightened. I also worried about her child. I asked her if she was okay and she ran away, looking behind her frantically. I told her I was worried about her, wouldn’t hurt her and just wanted to make sure she was safe. She kept speaking in another language so I have no idea what she said. She was very small, though, like midget size. She reminded me of a nymph or fairy.

115445-butternutKundalini Dream

Finished there, I went into the kitchen where a man was standing near the sink. I knew him and spoke to him like we were old friends. He was preparing food and I stopped to help him, squeezing in next to him as he stood over the sink. I held a chunk of butternut squash in my hand. The orange color is very vivid and memorable. I was working at getting to the center of the piece in my hand when he gently grabbed my hand and said, “No, eat the whole thing.” I had been about the drop the rind but stopped and put the squash on it and said, “Like this?” I held it up and then put the squash in his mouth for him to taste.

For some reason I reached up and kissed him squarely on the mouth. In the midst of kissing him I was confused by my actions. I was thinking he was not my type at all. He was a very large, burly man with facial hair and I recall that he had an accent – Australian.

He picked me up as we kissed. It surprised me. It was like I weighed nothing. I wrapped my legs around his midsection and we just kept making out. lol It was around this time, though, that my lucidity began to peak and the energetic sensations became noticeable.

My entire chakra system was activated but not sequentially. Instead it was like my chakras were blinking. Some blinked simultaneously. I felt like an energetic polka dot. I could feel all of them but some of them seemed to be in the wrong place, like to the left or right of where they should be or too close to one another. Or maybe I had additional chakras because it sure seemed like there were energy centers all over the place.

I remember talking to the man between kisses but I don’t know what we said now. All I recall now is thinking, “I shouldn’t be doing this.” He whispered to me several times, “You’re so good.” The last time he said it I woke up.

Reconstitution

My entire torso was aching when I woke up, especially my lower back and solar plexus region. The energetic sensations lingered for some time but instead of jumping all over the place it was mainly my mid-section that was buzzing. My neck was stiff like I had slept wrong, but since I was laying on my back I highly doubt that was the reason.

I could feel my guide and asked him, “Why did you look like that? Why were you so large?” He laughed and said, “Was I?” His response caused me to consider that perhaps I saw him that way for a reason. I recalled other K experiences and realized that his largeness represented indulgence and prosperity. The butternut squash was also symbolic. Symbolic of the second chakra.

I wondered about why he said, “You’re so good.” I asked him what he meant. Good at what? Kissing? lol But then I understood. He was responding to my statement. I’m trying to be a “good girl”.

Then I wondered about the strange energy. What is going on? He said, “Reconstitution.” All of my chakras are being reconstituted in preparation for the Kundalini. I remembered how I was warned about the last part of December. I was asked to prepare myself for the K energy, to eat properly, meditate, do yoga, etc. My guide tried to explain what reconstitution meant. He asked me, “What happens when you renovate a kitchen?” I said, “You completely gut it and then replace everything with something new and rearrange the space.” He said, “Yes. That is what is happening to you. You are changing.”

I fell into the in-between somehow and caught myself saying, “But she’s not human.” As I said this, I could see “her”. She was not human. Entirely of another species, likely an E.T. but my memory of what I saw is blurry. Her coloring was blue and there was a pulsating, multi-colored light within that resembled her blood maybe, or something else. I saw these tentacles coming off her and retracted from what I saw. I said it again, “She’s not human.” This is what brought me back to full awareness. What was that?

I thought perhaps I was seeing myself in another form. When I tried to remember her face all I recall seeing was slits, like for breathing maybe? The coloring of the skin was odd and really creeped me out. It was like she was an amphibian. Weird! I wondered if this was what Arcturians looked like? Or was this some other species?

I pushed it out of my mind and tried to return to the in-between. I didn’t but I heard that a reunion was taking place at other levels, in other dimensions. What I experience here is merely a reflection.

 

 

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Dream: Kundalini Formula

I woke at 5am with my mind full of concerns. I had asked for clarity about several issues prior to sleep but when I awoke I had none. So I requested clarity again. Why is it that my root chakra has been missing in my astral experiences? Why am I having so many physical issues related to my lower two chakras? Where is the Kundalini?

Dream: Lemonade

I was a partaking in a study. Each individual was to take one spherical shaped, yellow pill the size of a marble. Throughout the dream they were referred to as “lemonade“. There were instructions given, but I can’t remember them now. I do recall taking one of the pills and it tasting like lemonade, though. The main part I recall is someone holding a long, dark colored, circular cord about two inches wide that didn’t seem connected to anyone or anything. It had been punctured at one point and fluid was pouring out. I was alarmed, asking what could be done about it. The man in charge said that I would need to take five of the pills all at once. I was concerned. What would it do to me? I watched as he showed me. I saw the five pills all enter the energetic system. They appeared as yellow tendrils of energy and went directly to the brain and split into five distinct sections. I could see thoughts coming off, like branches of a tree. I don’t remember now what the thoughts said despite them being written in thin air. However, they appeared to be re-wiring the brain somehow.

Vibrations

I awoke in the midst of very chaotic, jagged vibrations. It felt as if my energy body was being jolted back and forth very rapidly. Additionally, there was a huge bubble of energy expanding from my root chakra. I couldn’t distinguish the root chakra in the energy, though. It felt more like an expansion of indistinct energy. Along with this my heart, third-eye and crown were active, though not as intensely. They felt dull in comparison. I also had pain in my lower back and pelvic region. It was uncomfortable. Just as I began to worry something was very wrong with me, the pain reduced substantially.

Dream: Kundalini Formula

Somehow I returned to sleep. I ended up in a parking lot outside a large mall that had been turned into a school. I searched for a parking place. There were many empty spaces but I wanted one in the shade. I saw several shaded spots but no trees to provide shade. Weird.

I was pushing my car rather than driving it. It’s engine was off and I was slowly putting it in various spots. My car was white, too, and not one I recognized.

I bypassed a spot because it had a baby stroller in it. I finally chose a space close to the front but I had chosen a lot nowhere near the main entrance. Concerned, I began to worry how I would find my way in. A woman and a man were outside with me. I knew them as fellow teachers. The man went inside using his key and the woman stayed with me. I went toward the entrance and found it, going inside. The woman followed me.

I had a red folder with me that I opened to review the contents. I had scribbled information down – dreams, thoughts, etc. Most of it mathematical equations. The page full of equations was titled, “Kundalini”. The woman saw it and asked to see it. I handed it to her, embarrassed that she would see my mathematical incompetence and judge me for my interest in Kundalini. She began to make corrections to the equations. I saw lines of fractions with letters mainly. The top row looked something like 1/a + 1/1 + a/1 + a/a = 1a/1a. She replaced the 1’s in the answer with 8’s. She did corrections on all of the lines, there were at least 7. Each line of fractions had different variables. They followed the page down in sequence: A, B, C, D….  In my discomfort and embarrassment I made excuses for my errors saying, “I’m a social studies teacher.” lol

The woman was impressed, holding the page of equations up and reviewing all of my notes. She asked me, “Can I make a video of this? This is excellent material!” I agreed. Before long there was a holographic screen up in front of me showing the video she created using my equations. I saw an outline image of a person. Then a rush of white light came in through the crown and flushed out the entire chakra system from top to bottom. What was left behind was a white, iridescent, swirling energy in the center where the spine should be. The white light expanded to fill up the energy body almost entirely.

The video shocked me for some reason and I was frozen there not knowing what to think. The woman was ecstatic and asked me if she could distribute the video in her name via the school. I agreed. She asked me to follow her up stairs. I did.

The rest of the dream was of me following her up 7 flights of stairs. Each one I climbed was different. Some longer than others. The sixth flight was the longest and steepest. I thought I would fall down but made it to the top. She was waiting for me at the top of the 7th. The 7th was very short, probably only five steps, but the only way to get to it was to jump because it was not linked to the other stairs by a landing. Instead, it seemed to come out of the wall a good distance above me. She gave me directions on how to jump up to it. I did. What is odd here is that there was a babydoll that spoke to me at this point. I have no idea what it said now but the woman activated it.

Explanation

When I awoke I spoke with my guide who appeared both as a woman and a man. It was odd and when I asked about it I was told, “I am YOU.” Then I was asked,”Are you only a woman?” I understood and said, “No, I am both.” I was told then, “As am I. I am you.”

The Kundalini dream was curious to me. Wasn’t the K energy suppose to go from bottom to top? Why was it shown to be doing the opposite? There was a in-flow of knowingness at this time. There lower two chakras are the current problem. There is a rejection of them and as such there are physical side-effects. I was encouraged to reflect upon the areas of life these chakras relate to. The answer would be seen therein.

I have had a headache ever since waking up.

 

 

 

 

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OBE: OM

My travels in dreamtime continue. 🙂

Lucid Dream: Rolling Chair Road

I was traveling a familiar road from other dreams. It is a long, dirt road lined with small ranchettes with houses. Every time I travel it, this road feels like the long road leading to my grandparents house. This time I was scooting along the road in a rolling office chair. lol I was having a good time, too, pushing myself in spurts and going as fast as I could. At one point I ran into a man doing the same thing. At another point I was slowed by a massive semi-truck that was backing its flatbed trailer down the road.

After passing the truck, I slowed and stopped at small office cubicles lining the road. I assume this is why I was in a rolling office chair? I chatted with various people, stopping to chat with a group of three guys I seemed to know. The guys were flirting with me and as I flew away I heard them discussing my age. One was sure I was much younger than I was while the other two were teasing him for his interest in me. Since this guy was interested in me, I flew over to him and he propositioned me. I did not refuse but found my chakra response to him was nonexistent. Again, like in my previous OBE, when I kissed him my mouth seemed to open up into this expansiveness that was very strange and brought me to full awareness.

Lucid Dream: Left Behind

I woke briefly and then entered into another lucid dream. I was talking with a store owner about her business and there was discussion about how the transfer of ownership would be handled when she passed away. A short-haired, masculine-looking but petite woman approached me and invited me to help her with a small business. I agreed. She showed me some things but then came onto me, somewhat pressuring me into becoming her girlfriend. I remember thinking it odd and not wanting to be involved romantically with a woman. Yet at the same time I allowed her to hold my hand and kiss me. My lucidity almost peaked at this time but I remained just below OBE level.

Then I was being shown a newly purchased home on 10 acres. The cost was discussed and a tour given. It was a very large house, newly remodeled. I was envious, wishing my home was as nice.

Inside, I was watching as everyone in the home was preparing for a vacation. I was not going and was surprised to find that everyone was going to be gone and I would be left home alone. I said, “I don’t know what I will do with all the alone time. Maybe I should go? No, there is no way I would get any sleep.” I started thinking about what I should do with my alone time. Meditate? So I began to take slow, deep breaths.

OBE: OM

I began to have memories then of an OBE in which I OM’ed and heard an entire chorus of monks OM with me. The memory brought me to full awareness. I was OOB in a blackenss, a void, floating horizontally as if laying in bed, but I did not sense any other objects, not even a bed, in the space. I could feel my guidance with me but I was not focused on them. Instead, I was caught up in an amazing, energetic vibration sweeping over me in waves. It was extremely calming and comfortable. I remember considering moving out of that state into a full projection, but felt I needed to stay.

The idea came to me that I needed to OM, so I did. The sound of it made me feel lighter. It was as if my entire energetic body came alive. It was not a normal vibrational pattern, either. It was like an expansion outward. Like I grew in size, filling the void or maybe becoming a part of it.

I OM’ed over and over again, each time extending the Mmm sound for longer and longer periods. The pitch of my voice began to waver at the end, almost like a melody and my body seemed to echo the sound of my voice. I noticed this and wondered if I stopped OM’ing, would my body OM on it’s own? So I stopped. Sure enough, my entire energetic body OM’ed. It was a fantastical feeling, too. It was not a blissgasm like the Kundalini often produces. Instead it was more of an amazing explosion of pure joy. My entire body was pulsating with sound and vibration. OMmmmmmm up and down and up and down in an ecstatic wave of joy.

Eventually, the vibrations and sound began to crescendo. Louder and louder. Stronger and stronger. This brought me back to my body in a rush of energy and I couldn’t stop smiling. Absolutely beautiful.

 

 

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Lyra Message

I was going to add this to my OBE post today but decided it should stand alone.

In my last OBE there was a song playing in the background which followed me to wakefulness. The song, Heaven by Bryan Adams. The specific lyrics were: “Baby you’re all that I want, when you’re lying here in my arms, Findin’ it hard to believe we’re in heaven.” Considering the OBE had nothing to do with romance of that sort, no true love or even feelings associated with it, the song made no sense to me and I promptly dumped it from my memory banks.

Later, as I shopped with my daughter, I remembered that a song had been in my head but I couldn’t remember anything about the song except that it had the word “heaven” in it. I knew, that I had to look it up when I got home. I Google songs from the 80’s about heaven to find it. lol I had total amnesia on the melody and lyrics. Didn’t take me long to find it, though. 🙂

Once I found it on YouTube I listened to it to make sure it was the right song. It was. However, the YouTube link address caught my eye, specifically the last five letters/numbers.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3eT464L1YRA

When I saw that it spelled Lyra I laughed. Heaven = Lyra for me since I’m a Pleiadian Starseed from the planet Lyra. Pretty cool, huh?

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OBE: I’m a Warrior

Woke at 5am wide awake but not wanting to get out of bed. Told my guides, “I want to astral” but felt it was unlikely because my kids wake so early. I have a personal space heater in my room so I switched it on to “fan” mode to drown out any noise that might interrupt my travels. Then I positioned myself flat on my back with my arms comfortably over my head and my pillow over my face. This position, weird as it is, seems to be most conducive to projecting for me lately. I have not projected from my side in ages.

OBE: Black Kitten

I entered into a dream in which I was watching a little, dark haired girl trying to get into a closet full of toys. I pushed the door shut with my foot. It hit her arm, hurting her. This was an accident and so I got up out of bed (and OOB) and let her into the closet which opened up to reveal many various toys. I moved them around to show her what was there and she morphed into a tiny, black kitten. The kitten surprised me and I re-entered my body.

I had not realized I was OOB until then. I had vibrations so I knew I could exit, so I tried, but I was really tired and relaxed, wanting only to stay right where I was. I pushed past it, though and walked across the room. My energy was failing so I asked for clarity and even heard my guidance suggest I do breathing exercises. This pulled me back into my body.

OBE: I’m a Warrior

When I re-entered my body this time I was able to exit again. This time, when I got out, my energy level was higher and I flew out of my room into the hallway. I got the idea to sing in order to raise my vibration. Words and an unfamiliar melody came out and immediately I felt myself grow lighter and my vision became crisper and more vivid. I was singing, “I can do anything. I’m a warrior….” There was more, but I can’t remember it now. It was all about feminine power, though. As I sang, an entire band joined me with back-up singers and everything. It sounded like jazz maybe and the singers sounded African American. lol

I flew down my stairs, singing the entire time, and went out the front door. Outside, the streets of my neighborhood were overgrown with tropical vegetation. Trees that were taller than the telephone poles with vines hanging off of them lined the streets. There was no evidence of the suburbia to be found. Seeing this made me super happy. I was over the moon with joy.

For some reason, though, my legs were hurting me while I was flying. I remember being distracted by them and worrying they would force me back into my body. I had an internal dialogue about it that went something like, “Don’t focus on them. But something’s wrong. Don’t focus on them, you will go back in body. But they hurt. What if something’s wrong? Nothing’s wrong…” LOL

Eventually, the leg discomfort was enough that I checked on my physical body. I went back to it but did not enter it. Instead, my vision blacked out and I recall moving my legs remotely. I wonder now if I even moved my legs at all because it is so surreal a memory but whatever I did worked. My legs stopped hurting.

Then I was back in flight. Somehow I managed to find a house amidst the vegetation and entered into a long hallway. The lights inside were dim and I encountered a woman with five small girls approximately the age of 8-9 years old. The girls were in a line heading outside to the back. I flew over the tops of their heads talking to them. I worried briefly that I would get into trouble for flying. Somehow I knew it was not allowed where I was. For some reason, though, they tolerated it and I accepted without ever mentioning it or asking permission.

I followed them outside to a courtyard and stayed floating above their heads. I looked at them all very carefully, trying to remember the details of their faces. They were all ethnicities. I recall seeing an African American girl with her hair in multiple ponytails. There was a blonde girl whose cheeks were covered in freckles. There was also a dark haired girl whose hair was about shoulder length but she was very shy and stood back.

I wondered what to say to them and had the idea to ask them if they had physical bodies. I saw the dark haired girl nod “yes” but I wanted to hear them say it so I repeated the question and heard another girl say, “Yes, we all do.” Then I asked, “Do you come here often?” The blonde girl said, “Yes, all the time.” I didn’t think to ask them if they had ever seen me. lol

Then I asked them, “Do you visit any other places?” I heard back, “Yes, sometimes.” I said, “Me, too.” I tried to remember the names of all the places I had been but my mind was blank except for memories and impressions. This is when the little freckle faced girl said, “I’ve been to Taipei.” I said, “Oh, I’ve never been there before.” For some reason I thought it was in Japan but now I know that I was thinking that I have been to Japan but at the time it confused me so I never told the girls about my travels there.

I recall then that the little girls went to a swimming pool and began to swim. I knew I could go with them but decided not to, flying off without saying goodbye. I was singing the song with music and background vocals again. This time, I stopped singing as I returned to my house and went up the stairs. The women singing continued and I recalled clearly the words, “I can do anything. I’m a warrior.” There was a third line but it is lost to me now. The last thing I recall upon return to my body was that my legs were hot from the insulated leggings I wore to bed (in the 20s last night). lol

warrioringardenOBE: Locked In

I could still feel vibrations so I decided to exit again. This time I went down the stairs and when I tried to leave via my front door it was locked. For some reason I got the idea that I would stand in front of my window and take my clothes off. I was sure it would get someone’s attention and they would come open the door for me. LOL I began with my shirt and bra and it was very difficult to get them off, they kept sticking and my fingers felt too big. I watched a car pull up and turn off its lights. A family approached the house, a mom and a couple of kids. By then my top was off but my bottoms were not cooperating.

I moved to the door to wait, fiddling with my drawstring which was too tight and in knots. I could hear the woman trying to unlock the door. I kept trying to get my clothes off quickly (not sure what I was thinking lol) and finally got my bottoms down and then couldn’t get them unstuck from around my feet. lol

The door opened and the woman entered. She was very obese but all I remember of her was her enormous thighs. They were as large as the seat of a chair. I sat down on her thigh (why? lol) and noticed that I could not feel my base chakra. It was like there was a huge, gaping hole in my energy body! This threw me because I had never experienced anything like it. Then for some reason I decided to kiss the woman. A big, wet french kiss. lolol What is odd here is that I don’t remember seeing or even feeling her lips or face. Instead, what I experienced was this massive space in my mouth and a distinct taste of salt, like ocean water. My mouth became expansive, like I was being sucked into a salty void. lol So completely weird!

As I woke up, the song Heaven by Bryan Adams was in my mind, specifically, “Baby you’re all that I want , when you’re lying here in my arms, I’m findin’ it hard to believe we’re in heaven.” Hmmm.

 Miscellaneous Thoughts

I wonder about my missing root chakra. It was a distinct feeling of empty space in my otherwise “whole” astral body. Like someone came and removed the entire chakra. Interestingly, when I woke, my lower back was hurting and I had started my monthly cycle early. This is the third month I’ve had an irregular cycle, too, which is very unusual for me. Are they related? Who knows.

The feminine theme of these OBEs is interesting to me. Every individual I encountered was female. In the final OBE I was looking for a male and swear I sensed one in the corner of my living room, yet I never approached him. It was like he was watching from the sidelines. A guide perhaps.

There were several in-between moments that occurred before these OBEs, too. Once I was underwater, breathing. It was as if I was fluid and part of the water. It was a beautifully integrated feeling and hard to describe. There are also memories of a discussion with others and seeing the numbers 11 and 111.

I also had several short exits from my body that failed abruptly and were followed by hypnagogia. I recall seeing thousands of tiny, perfect bubbles in my vision.  I’ve also been experiencing vibrations, which is not usual. This is the third night in a row that I have awakened to vibrations and/or hypnagogia. The other nights, though, I was unable to exit my body.

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OBE: Illusion

Busy night.

Dream: Drug

At some point in the night I entered into a semi-lucid dream in which I was inside a house with a man. I seemed to get a tour of it, specifically the back garden and the garage. There was a small vegetable garden that had been neglected. The vegetables were wilting and there were some weeds but it could be salvaged. Inside the garage there was a single, white table. On it was food. I don’t recall what kind, just that I ate some and then felt large, grainy stuff in my mouth, like crystals. I stopped eating and became horrified realizing I had just eaten some kind of drug. I spit it out as fast as I could but knew it had already dissolved into my tongue and gotten into my system. My friend was reassuring me that it was no big deal, smirk on his face the whole time.

He asked me how I felt. I could feel this large energy surround me and settle around my head and face. It made me dizzy and disoriented so I held onto a chair to balance myself. There was a strange all-over feeling I can’t quite describe. It is what I would expect a heavy dose of an illegal drug would do, except I have never done any drugs like that so I don’t know. I kept looking to my friend for reassurance and he just kept smiling (ugh!) and asking how I felt. I got pretty nervous because the energy was so weird! It felt so physical yet I knew it was not and my head was the main focal point. My cheeks were numb and as I stood there my arms and hands became numb, too! There was also a strange energy in my stomach and all of it was just too much.

I startled awake. It was 4am. The energy was gone but my hands were both completely numb! lol I requested sleep because I have been waking up early every morning. I was able to fall asleep and entered into another semi-lucid dream.

Dream: Into the Nothingness

I was in my mom’s house with several family members, one of which was my SIL. I was flying around the whole time and confused as to whether I was really awake or dreaming. I did things that I needed to do upon waking like put out the trash and get ready for work. I was also extremely thirsty and seeking water. When I filled my glass from the refrigerator the liquid was brown and bubbly and I realized it was coke. This peaked my lucidity.

I went to my mom’s closet to borrow a sweater and as I was putting on clothing I wondered again if I was awake or not. This is when I realized I was floating and not standing and became completely lucid in the dream.

Upon realizing I was dreaming I entered into a place of nothingness similar to the in-between but I was OOB. One of my guides was speaking to me, instructing me. He said something about how I was there to regain my abilities in astral. He spoke of things I needed to practice like creating vortexes and such but I can’t remember his exact words. I was very happy and agreeable, listening like a good student. I don’t remember ever seeing him, I just felt his energy near me.

During this instruction period I remember feeling various energies. In one instance I was connecting to my friend Angela. I felt a huge wall of energy around me. It felt like water. It washed over me, like a tidal wave but it was very gentle. I remember allowing the flow of it to come over me and enjoying it but at the same time knowing I needed to connect with her to see how she was doing. Was she in an emotionally turbulent state right now? I wondered.

OBE: Illusion

At some point in my instruction my guide/teacher let me loose to practice. When this happened a rush of perception hit me all at once. I was floating in the middle of a suburban neighborhood and I was reminded that I needed to set an intention. My vision was crisp, the air was cool and the colors were amazing. I was floating at window level of the house I was near. I lifted up higher toward the rooftops and trees and stated my intent. I wanted to visit with a friend. I flew as I repeated my intent and let go, allowing myself to be drawn into the portal that I was creating to take me to my set location. Instead of going into the portal, though, I felt someone grab my left foot and begin to pull me. I was thinking I was going to be taken somewhere but instead I was set firmly on the ground, as if I was being told to stay grounded or maybe that I was grounded when it came to visiting this friend.

Undeterred, I asked why I was not being taken to this person. I was told, “Because there are things you need to see.” I replied, “But I need to see this person.” I explained why and was still very happy and carefree about it, convinced I would get my way.

I continued to fly and headed away from the houses. My vision was so crisp at one point that I had to remind myself I was OOB and to not get carried away by the lucidity of the situation. I could hear music every once in a while. The music was of a song I know called Illusion. I didn’t focus on the music, though, and it moved to the background.

I flew up high toward the stars and the light dimmed, as if night suddenly descended. There was a moment here that I knew I should not go any higher or attempt a visit into outer space. I somehow knew I was in an alternate reality created just for me to practice in. So, I changed my mind and went back down and the daylight returned. I did flips and just generally enjoyed my freedom. It was refreshing!

I was still trying to convince my guide why I should get what I wanted when I looked down and saw my dog, Trooper, in a three-sided cubicle chained up. I decided to investigate and flew down to him. He was soaking wet and I commented on it as I greeted him. I unchained him and said, “Do you want to go swimming!? I know that’s your most favorite thing to do!” My dog jumped and was enthusiastic so I took him to a pool and we jumped in together. We swam across the pool and then he overwhelmed me, pushing me underneath him and under the water. I remember feeling the water come over my head and not being concerned. I grabbed him by the collar and led him to the side of the pool.

When I got out my mom was standing there and sent me a telepathic message about a situation that had occurred with my son. He had been bullied on the bus and the perpetrators were paying for it, literally. She said something to me about them owing $2,000 total but $1,000 was already paid. She said, “And they will pay.” I remember thinking it odd that this would be brought to me as part of what I needed to “see”. I wondered about it and then settled into the nothingness space again. My guide close, I knew I would wake soon, which I did. I entered my body very gently.

Illusion

As I settled into my body I heard the song Illusion again, specifically the part, “Please don’t go. I want you to stay.” But again I wasn’t really paying attention to the song. Instead, I was focused on my guide who was close by. He said to me, “Remember who you are.” I said back, “What exactly is that suppose to mean?” Before I finished my question a thought entered my mind – A spiritual Being having a human experience. Not impressed, I then noticed the music repeating in my head over and over. I acknowledged it saying, “Oh, I get it! You want me to stay so you are bribing me with OBEs to keep me interested!” I laughed because my guidance knows me so well.